The Dr. Jay Gordon method of night weaning - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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#31 of 46 Old 02-08-2002, 12:41 AM
 
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Strange turn of events. i took my son to the dentist today for the first time and he said his teeth are decaying (one tooth is chipped) and the night nursing is making it much worse....Now I may be compelled to stop at night. I'm not sure how I'm going to handle it. I guess I'll have to look for info regarding this new issue.

P.s. I got my period at 14 months and I was exclusively nursing a lot and I am very lean. the point. You will get your period when your body is ready and probably very soon. Just be sure to get enough food.
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#32 of 46 Old 02-08-2002, 02:01 AM
 
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Just to add another experience, I was dreading night weaning DS and it really was not as bad as I thought it would be. We prepared for it ahead of time, and when it happened, that he woke and I said no we did have a crying fit, but we were right there with him. The worse it ever got was 1/2 hour of crying. Within a few nights he was getting used to the idea. And then the fussing was briefer each night. We transitioned to singing our goodnight song and/or his little music player which helps to calm him. Within a week it was much easier.
And now, a bit more than two weeks later, he is sleeping a 7 hour stretch without waking. Amazing!! I would never have thought it possible.
I am convinced that it is the nursing that keeps them waking up so often all night long.
If you want to read some not so traumatic success stories about night weaning, read the 'Help Weaning Conflict' by menanny. I will bump it up so you can check it out.
Good luck to you all. it can be done.
And milesmom, welcome to the boards!!!! Glad to see you here finally
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#33 of 46 Old 02-08-2002, 03:41 AM
 
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I knew it was you when I read the part about the music player! Congratulations on joining the sleeping people!!!!

What do you think about the tooth decay? I really don't want to be forced to night-wean before we're really ready.

Please post and let's talk too. This alternative community is such a small world (a little too small but we're getting there).
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#34 of 46 Old 02-08-2002, 09:40 AM
 
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milesmom - i can relate to the tooth decay, it's why I night weaned. Did you dentist tell you not to nurse to sleep also? Mine did, but I just don't think he's ready to give that up yet - though night weaning went very smoothly for us. But he almost always nurses to sleep and always has. He has a checkup at the end of the month and I'm hoping just the night weaning will have made a difference in slowing the tooth decay. I guess we'll see.

Also - for those who are a little afraid of night weaning Dr. Jay's method I think really prevents it from being traumatic b/c the first few days you are nursing, but just for a shorter time and your child is starting to learn to go back to sleep without the boob in his mouth, yet your not completely refusing him. I think this made a huge difference. When I night weaned my first ds I just outright refused to nurse from the start of night weaning and he cried hard and woke a lot the first few nights. With my second ds we used Dr. Jay's method and when we got to the point of refusing all together he only cried a few minutes - it wasn't what I would consider traumatic at all.

So if you are thinking of night weaning you may want to see how your child responds to being nursed for a minute or two and then latched off and hugged, cuddled or sung to sleep - instead of seeing how they react when you totally refuse them. They may be more cooperative than you'd imagine.

Best of luck!
LMK
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#35 of 46 Old 02-08-2002, 11:07 PM
 
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milesmom - Sorry to hear about the tooth decay. I've been worried about that also, but haven't been to the dentist yet. The pediatrician said his teeth look okay, but he has a chipped tooth too ( has had it since summer). She told me that if he does nurse at night, have a damp cloth close by and just wipe off his teeth with it after he nurses. I tried it when ds was younger, but it always woke him up again, but maybe it could help your ds if he sleeps more soundly.

About the period, I'm also really lean and have trouble keeping my weight at 100 or above since having given birth, so I wonder if that's part of it too. It's hard to find time to eat when chasing a very active toddler, and I think nursing really must use up a lot of calories because I'm always hungry.

Dotcommama - Thanks for your words of encouragement on nightweaning not being too traumatic. I keep trying to find Dr. Jay Gordon's webpage but I can't get to it as www.drjaygordon.com, and I even tried a search on the web to find his name, no luck. Any tips? But the trying to nurse for a short time for the first few nights sounds a lot more do-able for me than refusing outright! I think I might try it this weekend if I feel brave.

Thanks for everyone's honesty and support, it's so great to read what everyone's going through and not feel so alone when the vast majority of the people I know and what the media shows is so different from the way I feel and choose to raise my son.
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#36 of 46 Old 02-09-2002, 12:07 AM
 
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zzmommy - Here is the link to the article on night weaning. (hope the link works)

http://www.drjaygordon.com/pediatricks/sleep.htm

edited to add - I tested the link and it works for me - if it doesn't work i just did a yahoo search for dr. jay gordon and his web site comes up. then search for night weaning on his site - it's the first article that appears.

LMK
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#37 of 46 Old 02-21-2002, 05:12 PM
 
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Just bumping this for another mommy!

Warmly~

Lisa

Lisa, Todd, Dane and Amber: & :::
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#38 of 46 Old 04-27-2002, 01:21 AM
 
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Just bumping again

Warmly~

Lisa

Lisa, Todd, Dane and Amber: & :::
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#39 of 46 Old 07-12-2002, 12:22 PM
 
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Bumping for Kiddoson.

Lisa, Todd, Dane and Amber: & :::
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#40 of 46 Old 07-12-2002, 01:37 PM
 
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dotcommomma and others: I've never used any "method" for nightweaning (I'd hate to 'fail'.) The Baby Book is always my resource for ideas and then trial and error. One thing that made it a little easier for me with dd2, is that when I had to make a couple of business trips, she did just fine with DH!!! So she could sleep without momma's 'nursery'! This helped me relax and know that we could do it.

With dd1, when she would go from 9pm - 4am without nursing, that was nightweaning for me. That's 7 hours without mommy milk, she gave up the 4am nursing around 11 months. btw, dd1 did all this on her own.

dd2 was a little different (I wohm.) She was a reverse scheduler and a very avid night nurser. When she was 18 months old, I got a promotion, we had to move and I was working 12 hour days. I couldn't keep up with the all night nursing. Since she was fairly verbal, I started telling her that "we're not going to nurse in the bedroom anymore" I'd nurse her all she wants in the living room before bed, but not nursing to sleep or during the night. It took a couple of weeks, but she understood it. DH would sleep next to her when he came to bed. She fussed a little & some nights she asked to sleep on my chest, which was fine. Also, up to that point I slept without a shirt on to make night-nursing easier, but I started sleeping in a t-shirt. All in all, it took a couple of months to get it completely done. We still cosleep too.

Don't know if this is helpful, but get as many ideas as you can and follow your heart!! I couldn't take time to read all the posts, but there are a lot of wonderful mommas here with some wonderful advice!

hugs
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#41 of 46 Old 07-16-2002, 02:36 PM
 
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Hi Everyone!! It's me, BRIGITTE&EITAN (I am registered at 2 different computers, so I have 2 screen names). Anyhow, Eitan is now nightweaned going on 2 months now. Sometimes he sleeps all night long, and other nights he'll wake up once or twice. It was really hard, and the first night he screamed for about an hour. He really didn't accept it for weeks, and it took a lot of patience to always be supportive, and never show my own frustration. Eitan is extremly persistent and determined with what he wants, and even after all this time he'll occasionally ask to nurse in the middle of the night. If my husband is willing, Eitan usually does better if Daddy does the comforting. Last week, Eitan slept 3 or four nights in a row from 9 pm to 6 am, so there is hope!

I just got to the piont when he turned 19 months that I couldn't handle nursing every hour or two, so I'm glad to be done with that. We nurse from 6 am to 8 am straight every morning, and will probably do so 'till he weans himself.
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#42 of 46 Old 09-18-2002, 12:57 AM
 
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Bump

Lisa, Todd, Dane and Amber: & :::
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#43 of 46 Old 09-24-2002, 02:30 PM
 
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Hey ya'll,
Thank goodness I didnt have to get up and go to work. Some nights my daugther wore me out entirely. She is night weaned for the most part (at 4 years old!!!) gasp. Now when we go to sleep I say, we are not going to nurse in the night tonight ok? And, she agrees. Most of the time it works if I give her plenty of fluids before bedtime. She was really not ready until she was almost 4 to wean at night. I tried several times and it was just to much for her. Now she generally only nurses to sleep and again in the am.

So, the age of natural night weaning for us was around 4 YIKES! She does sleep better at night as she gets older. I think she was about 3 before she slept for 5 hours straight. She is a high need child, so she needed more of everything then most kids do.
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#44 of 46 Old 07-04-2004, 12:17 PM
 
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To me, having dad do all the comforting when mom had been nursing seems like abandonment. I mean that's what I think the kid would think. When I night-weaned DD, she was still in our bed, so we were both there, but somehow DH seemed to sleep thru her every waking! I told her that the "alrights" (her word for nursing and breasts) were sleeping, and when the sun came up she could have some. It helped her to be able to put her hand on them till she fell asleep again, though it was hard to get her to NOT do this when we were out and about. :doh

Good luck to all you ladies night-weaning, it sure does feel good to get a full night's sleep when it's done! Just don't do what I did and use that kid-asleep time to get pregnant again :LOL, cuz it just starts again! : (Just kidding, I think we timed it just right. I'm just dreaming of sleep.....)

Monica , DH :cop , DD (8) , DS1 (5) , DS2 (2/09) , and the pup
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#45 of 46 Old 07-04-2004, 01:09 PM
 
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hey there
we're doing a modified jaygordon sleep plan here.
Ds is only 11mos 1week so i can't/won't go full force with it - but he went from waking every 3 hours to nurse all night to waking every 45min-1hr 15minutes and i have been slowly going insane. I watch two 2.5yo's during the day and have a 3.5yo so i really do need some sleep. No teeth coming thru that i can see and he's healthy as a horse. and dry as a bone lol. So we decided to try.

its been a few weeks of slowly incorporating dr.gordons ideas into our bed. Dh is sleeping with dd in her room for the most part while we do this since he's a huge distraction to ds plus he's a total wimp and wants to pick him up and walk with him every time he even whines lol.

I spent the first month doing the short nursing when he woke, popping him off the nipple and using keywords and backpatting to get him to sleep. This month i've started just using the keywords and backpatting and not nursing at all. Its only been a few nights but he's doing ok. Last night was rough. He nursed down at 9pm, woke at 12:30am (not bad, a long stretch for us) and i got him back down till 3am. which was great without nursing. Then he woke at 4 and 5am and cried for just a minute or two before crashing again with keywords/backpatting. and when he woke at 6 it was light so i nursed him and we slept till 8 together. I'm hoping every night it'll get a bit easier and we can get a stretch from 9pm-6am. thats like 9 hours tho

anyway. we're here trying it too
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#46 of 46 Old 07-18-2004, 10:39 AM
 
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BUT ella just does not want to cooperate!!!!

 Mom of many minions . . . babyf.gif jumpers.gif     jumpers.gif     jumpers.gif
"And when our baby stirs and struggles to be born it compels humility: what we began is now its own." Margaret Mead 
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