New baby, really want to wean almost 3 yr. old - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-03-2003, 03:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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deleted because I'm not getting any replies and anyway I figured it out.
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Old 03-05-2003, 04:17 AM
 
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I'm sorry you didn't get any replies (I didn't read your original post). I clicked on this thread because I was wondering the same thing! I don't have a new baby yet, but would prefer ds to be weaned before I do. If things go according to plan, he would be about 3 when we have our next baby.

What did you figure out?
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Old 03-05-2003, 08:03 PM
 
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I am in the process of weaning my near 3 yr old. I am doing a combination of things. The first is I am really listening to him. I know he is at a stage where he is ready to wean, but still likes the closness and comfort he gets. So one of the things I am working on is replacing some of the nursing times with snuggle time. I also have eliminated completely the nursing done out of boredom simply by say no. He complained for maybe 1-2 minutes then went on to do something else. There are two nursing sessions that are that he seems to need the most. That is going to sleep and waking up. For the waking up session I try to be awake before him so that I do not lazily nurse. For the sleep nursing I am trying to shorten them to just a few minutes. I do not know how long this will take, but I do notice that nursing is not as important to him and sometimes he will even say he does not need it.

I had tried this approach earlier without much reduction in weaning. I think he was not quite ready although there were hints. I am hoping that by his 3rd b-day nursing will be rare and completely done by 3 1/2.

I have dedided to encourge weaning simply because I am not enjoying it anymore and it feels like a chore rather than I time of closeness. I am looking forward to the time when snuggles are enough.

Good luck and take your time.
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Old 03-07-2003, 01:43 PM
 
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hi i also have a newborn and almost 3 year old-

pls repost your situation
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Old 03-07-2003, 02:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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marchmom--I was JUST about to reply to your post because our situations are so similar! It sounds like you're getting things figured out-we are too. I nursed ds through pregnancy, and towards the end decided to start the weaning process, mainly because he has developed a very lazy latch, and nursing him hurts. I started doing the counting thing sometime in the last trimester, and also limiting to twice and sometimes only once a day. It was going really well. DS would often unlatch himself with his finger when I reached 10 or 20. Then DD arrived early, at 36 weeks, before ds was totally weaned. Then my milk came in, and of course that made ds want to nurse more often. I have been unable to comfortably nurse both at the same time, with DS's lazy latch. I've tried working with him to get him to open wider, but he refuses. I've dealt with a lot of guilt in the two weeks since dd arrived, and shed a few tears, but now I'm clear that I need ds to wean. If he would correct his latch, I would continue to nurse, but it's just not happening, and it's not fair to me to have to be in pain every time he nurses. We're down to bedtime and morningtime nursing sessions now, and I keep them breif--under 2 minutes. He's not always happy about my saying no during the day, but I know he'll be fine. I distract him with activities and sometimes videos (he's a huge Raffi fan), and sometimes resort to bribery with treats (healthier ones from the nat. food store). I cuddle and hold him as much as possible. As dh says, "He still knows you love him."

I hope it continues to go well for you, marchmom! I'll update this post as things progress.

Greenfrogs--thanks for your post. I feel exactly the same way--I am not enjoying it. The nursing part of our relationship isn't working out anymore for me, but that doesn't mean the closeness has to end.
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Old 03-07-2003, 03:35 PM
 
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Boobykin,

My son has a lazy latch too. I think that is part of my reason for starting to wean. I do seem less annoy when he is doing some serious nursing, rather than sort of goofing around. Goofing around is become more common.
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