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Old 08-13-2003, 11:26 PM
 
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fishomama,\

I've been struggling with this with my 28 month old. He gets very upset when I try to talk to him about it, though he is happy to switch sides if that helps (at first, even that was upsetting to him). I have little to offer, but here goes ...

I'm not pregnant, but sometimes my nipples are very sensitive during ovulation, and that definitely makes it worse. The other thing that I've noticed is that when I'm stressed-out, I seem to get slightly off-balance with my bacteria and a few acidophilus pills help -- it kind of feels like he's gnawing, and nursing just hurts a lot (usually on my right side more than my left, for some reason). I discovered it by 'accident' once when I wondered whether I might have thrush and then ended up with two other problems that can be caused by the imbalance and corrected with acidophilus. I don't know about use of acidophilus in pregnancy, but you could up your intake of yogurt, incase it helps.

It doesn't alleviate the problem of the chewing, but it seems to help with the sensitivity that seems to be brought on by the imbalance.

Good luck. I look forward to hearing what others offer up ...
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Old 09-03-2003, 03:40 PM
 
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My wife nurses our 19 month old boy---32 pounds, 36" tall.

He's not fat, just very big and powerful-- you should see him push the bassinet filled with toys around the kitchen!!

He nurses like a fiend-- and he's not backing off at all, in fact he seems to be increasing in intensity-- along with all kinds of organic veggies, fruits and meats-- an entire chickenbreast in one meal!

The problem is that we want to have another child but not hamper his style-- so we just want to increase the nutrients that breastfeeding uses. We just want to make sure that the growing baby will get everything needed.

My idea is to juice organic fruits and vegetables. For instance, according to this website

http://www.juicingbook.com/vegetables/

turnips have a good deal of magnesium, which I know is important for calcium absorption, and which is depleted by excessive lactation.

Have any of you done this and/or would any of you be interested in compiling our research efforts to come up with the ideal juicing supplements? I don't want to use pills or powders, just the good natural stuff that nature provides.


Ray
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Old 09-03-2003, 05:54 PM
 
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JenniferJeffrey,

I think I would've told the electrician to get out of my house immediately. That is so creepy. I am so sorry that you aren't feeling supported in your community for doing something that is so important to you and your baby -- and to your community. Talk about the benefits to public health, not to mention fewer tantrums, etc. I think it's absolutely abominable -- short-sighted, narrow-minded, and the like, to criticize extended nursing. I'm glad that you're following your mamaheart and giving, giving, giving.

Take care of your self.
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Old 09-04-2003, 10:58 AM
 
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Just posting my support. As DD is only 20 months old, I don't quite fit into this category yet. We'll see if DD lets us walk down this path.

Right now she nurses twice a day (waking and bedtime) but those times are avid, long and lovely. I WAH full time, so our daytime nursing has never been frequent, and she doesn't even ask for it during the day on weekends, but I have a feeling she'll keep these last two sessions for a good long time.

Dh says, "She'll nurse until college." My response, "If I'm lucky...." LOL.
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Old 09-05-2003, 05:38 PM
 
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I just stumbled onto this thread a little late. I guess I am ebfing. I never really thought about it, but now Ds is 25 months and still happily nursing. Although he really doesn't nurse very often, and I think he is on his way to weaning. He is down to about twice a day now. I'm 7 weeks pregnant with #2 and it is hard to nurse Ds as my nipples really hurt. I am hoping it will stop soon so I can get back into the swing of things. I never thought I would want to tandem nurse, but now I find that the idea really doesn't bother me much. I just hope that nursing this babe goes better from the start than it did with Ds. My nipples cracked and bled for the first 6 months. I probably would have quit if I weren't so darn stubborn. But it really wasn't Ds's fault. He had GER and was really sick those first 6 months. I am hoping that won't happen this time.

So thats my story.
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Old 09-05-2003, 08:12 PM
 
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I am not sure if I have posted to this thread or not. But I am still nursing Littlebit. He will be 3.6 tomorrow. I don't see us stopping anytime soon. He still nurses alot during the day. Or should I say he snacks alot. He loves his Nynees.

He has been sick the last few days. When I was feeding him the other night. When he was done he told me That is so good Mommy Yum. I thought that was so sweet.

NOw that he has been sick he is waking at night again. I am sorry he is sick but I was missing his night nursing. I know he will not nurse forever. But I want to hold on to everyday that he does nurse. I cherish it as it is our last because I have no way of knowing when he will wean.

I am so glad to see there are so many others that have choosen to EN. I wish so much that I would have BF my 2 older kids. I think it is the most wonderful thing ever. All you wonderful mommys out there keep up the good work.
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Old 09-15-2003, 06:49 PM
 
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I am nursing my 3 yo. She and my 10yo are still in the "family bedroom" if not the fgamily bed. 10 yo nursed until her 5th b-day and quit on her own. 3 yo nurses all the time (probably 10x a day). I am concerned about going to the hospital to deliver and having to stay over night. How will 3yo sleep/not nurse for all that time. I have considered home birth but have wanted an epidural the last 2 times, so . . . Have any of you been through this? Many say jus to wean 3yo during this next 9 months but I don't think that's fair to her. She still is very reliant on it. Any ideas?
Wendy
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Old 09-17-2003, 02:01 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by dandjsmama
Have any of you been through this? Many say jus to wean 3yo during this next 9 months but I don't think that's fair to her. She still is very reliant on it. Any ideas?
Wendy
Wendy, I think you may discover over the next few months that your 3yo may slow down considerably and it won't be a huge concern when it comes time to go to the hospital for delivery. Even if it doesn't, while the separation may be difficult on your 3yo, it will be quickly forgotten when you arrive home with the new baby and a refreshed milk supply.

Shayna
Momma to Hunter (4) and Hudson (2)
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Old 09-17-2003, 06:32 PM
 
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Checking back in at 17 weeks preg. Things are going well. Ds, 3.5 is still nursing. It doesn't hurt as much now. I really do think it's the pregnancy hormones that make it hurt and not the top teeth per se,even if it feels like it. He's asking less and even wanting to sleep on his own more often. I'm proud of him and still happy to let him curl up to be my baby when he wants. The spud has a healthy heartbeat as of yesterday's check up and I'm starting to feel the tiny kicks.
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Old 09-17-2003, 06:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm glad things are going better for you shinybutton!
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Old 09-17-2003, 07:52 PM
 
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by JenniferJeffrey
One evening I had to have an electrician here and he was saying what a treat it was to see and how he couldn't wait to tell the guys at work and he was talking about getting glimpses of my flesh, not about EB, he gave me the creeps[QUOTE][

The guy may just be that dense to be unaware that he offended you or he may have intended to intimidate and humiliate. Either way he deserves to be set straight. If he works for a reputable company, his supervisor needs to be made aware of his highly unprofessional behavior and demand a written apology and notification of what sort of action the company is taking to keep this from happening to someone else in the future. They should grovel appropriately in hopes of not being sued and they may even fire the SOB. If he's a one man operation, then politely inform him that since he apparently is of the opinion that instead of feeding your child in his own home as God intended, that you were actually putting on a personal peep show for his viewing pleasure, that your tip should just about cover the bill for his services and to be sure to avoid letting the door hit him in the ass on his way out! Then report him to the Better Business Bureau so other potential customers can be warned off. I'm sure none of this occurred to you at the time. It sucks when you get flattened by someone's offensive behavior and can't think of what to say until much later. Hopefully you'll be better armed next time but please say you've learned your lesson that strangers coming into your home are a lot more dangerous than those out in public. They know where you live and become privy to your private life. For all you know, this guy could have been straight out of prison. People rarely ask for a background check on the repairman but maybe we should. I'm so sorry you had such an awful experience. I wish the world were different but unfortunately the reality is there are plenty of perverts and bigots and ignorants to give every one of us an awful time trying to raise our kids the way God meant us to. I am discrete to save my son the trauma of dealing with them and I try to be lactivist in arenas that will insulate him from it's effect. I long for the day when popular opinion will protect us from all that but that day is not here yet. Good news, my most recent Babies R Us catalog was chock full of breast pumps, slings, and carriers along with the usual fare. We're making progress!!!
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Old 09-20-2003, 01:25 AM
 
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Hi Nursing Mamas,
This is my first post at this board. I am currently nursing a 4.4 yr, 2 yr old and my 8 weeks old baby. I very much believe in child-led weaning but sometimes feel like I'm losing my mind because my oldest nursling is a marathon nurser . I swear she'd write poetry about her "baboos" if she were old enough! She and my 2 yr old son sometimes have complete meltdowns if the other is nursing when they want to. It's not as intense as it was right after the baby was born and I hope that our nursing relationships continue but it is hard when family think your have lost your mind and when they continually tell my 4 yr that she is too old to still be nursing but we have an ongoing conversation about our nursing relationship and we both feel good about it right now. Anyhoo this is a great thread. Peace to all of you.

Ann
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Old 09-20-2003, 10:46 AM
 
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Wow!!!

Throw your arms around your back and give yourself a huge hug!!! You are amazing.
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Old 09-20-2003, 06:40 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome to the community lunarmama. It's good to have you with us.


Mother_Sunshine
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Old 09-21-2003, 10:07 PM
 
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So glad to find this thread!

The support of peers can make all the difference. My dd just turned 4 and no-one I hang out with nurses this long. I have one friend who was still nursing her 3.5 year old and so we would always compare notes with each other, but she just weaned completely. I have to admit, I was on my way to doing the same, without any good reason other than pressure from others and the fact that I didn't personally know anyone else still nursing at this age. I had one very fortuitous, brief phone conversation with an aquaintance who nursed her daughter until 6-7 yo, and it really made me stop and reevaluate.

I love nursing! My daughter loves nursing! That's the bottom line. I did set boundaries and restrictions finally, but I'm easing up on some of them. We don't nurse in the day at all anymore, and we were at the point of only nursing at bedtime, if that, and nothing in the night or morning. Now I'm letting her occasionally nurse in the middle of the night or in the morning if she asks for it.

I was getting so much positive feedback from my genuinely supportive and accepting friends and family for the "advances" that I was making in my work of gradual weaning. I was proud of myself for being able to actually have some control over some aspect of my parenting life. But that's really a lot of what weaning was about, control. And that's not what I want to base this nursing relationship on. I completely support my friend who just weaned, because she was at a point of really hating breastfeeding and resenting and avoiding her daughter, but for me, it's not the same.

Just here to say thank goodness we are all here to support each other, because just one conversation with one mama was enough to really turn things around for us, and I'm so grateful!
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Old 09-23-2003, 10:42 PM
 
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Oh my goodness! I thougth I WAS already EB LOL!! Benjamin is 15 months and I plan to allow him to wean when he wants but I never would have imagined some children nursing at four and five and beyond! Dont get me wrong here... I LOVE the idea of nursing that long I just didnt know it was being done.

Funny thing is that people asked me how long I was going to nurse and I said at least a year... then it was probably 2 years like the WHO recommends.. then it was AT LEAST 2 years... now its, whenever he wants, probably a few more years. LOL I love the reactions I get. I have a very strong personality and enjoy a challange so when someone even tries to say something negative Im ready!! hehehe

Well Im very encouraged ladies, thank you for such wonderful support... and now off to more reading here

Trisha - Nursing student and mom to Jacob 14, Isaac 2001, Benjamin 7, David 5 and Christopher 3
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Old 09-23-2003, 11:37 PM
 
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I know I'm not the first to say this, but I think the whole at least 2yrs thing is funny, because once you've gotten to 2yrs, most kids aren't going to give up without a fight. Unfortunately, an acquaintance of mine who found herself nursing a 3yo has told me that the next kid will be weaned at 15mo at the latest, because she doesn't want it to get all drawn out again. The 3yo is very close to a pretty gentle weaning now, which i am happy to see.
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Old 09-24-2003, 11:24 AM
 
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Hi Everyone!
So glad I found this thread!!!! Am EB only daughter who is 3.5 yrs. old. I love it for the most part except for her night waking/nursing! She has NEVER been a great sleeper and I feel like I will never get a good nights rest! Lately, she's taken to waking 3-4x/night to nurse! A few months ago she would go to bed around 8 pm, wake around 4 am to nurse, then wake at 8 am. This new routine is about to send me over the edge! I'm so sleep deprived on a daily basis that I can hardly stand it! All the women in my local LaLeche League have night weaned their children and urge me to do the same. I've tried negotiating/putting time limits on her night nursing and her response is always tears and continual tugging on my shirt. It breaks my heart when this happens ! I try to explain how I need sleep and "mama milk" needs sleep and how she needs sleep to be healthy and rested. She says she understands but then immediately reaches for my breast again! My only saving grace has been to stop looking at the future and to just concentrate on our needs on a daily basis. I've read that a child will stop nursing when that particular need is met. I hold on to this and the fact that I am providing her comfort and reassurance as she grows. I know it will change eventually, but there are days that I just really need some support from others who have/are going through something similar. So, if you are out there - please respond! Thanks for listening and for giving me strength through this mother-inspired and child-respected thread!

Warmly,
Dot, mother to the "sugarcube" - Simone (3.5 yrs nursing and counting!)
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Old 09-28-2003, 03:30 AM
 
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Well my OB says I need to wean my 3yo soon since breastfeeding could trigger early labor later on. I just shined her on of course but have no intention of stopping, and I guarantee neither does 3yo! Can anyone just assure me that it will be ok to keep going. I know I have heard it is, but how can doctors be so positive about what they think will happen?

Wendy
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Old 09-28-2003, 03:36 AM
 
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I never weaned my daughter when I became pregnant when she was 16 months old and I nursed through that pregnancy and miscarriage (no early labor, though; the babies died and some weeks later I still didn't have labor) and I didn't wean her with this pregnancy (delivered when she was 35 months). I was a little high risk for premature delivery this time and I went to 38.5 weeks.

It seems, from my reading, that the receptors in your uterus have to be open for business before hormonal stimulation from nipple stimulation or orgasm will cause premature contractions. Personally, I would watch if contractions intensify during nursing or don't go away after nursing. How often/intensely does a three year old usually nurse anyway? You're hopefully getting more hormonal stimulation from DP anyway!? LOL.

Good luck!
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Old 09-28-2003, 10:49 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by dandjsmama
I am concerned about going to the hospital to deliver and having to stay over night. How will 3yo sleep/not nurse for all that time. Wendy
If you're still nursing then, check and see if your hospital has any provision for early release. My hospital has instituted a new plan whereby a mother and new baby, who don't have any serious complications, can be released after 24 hours from the birth and then are visited by a nurse at home for the next couple of day to check on them and make sure all is well. I plan to use this if at all possible since last time it was like torture to be in the hospital that long even though we insisted on keeping the baby in the room with us. I barely got any sleep there.
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Old 09-28-2003, 11:21 AM
 
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Well, weaning has happened,and not at all like I expected. I ended up with a UTI and the OB put me on Macrobid. It was Sat. when I called him and it sounded like he was at the hospital getting ready to deliver someone's baby so I didn't try to call back after I got the Rx and discovered in the insert that it said that this drug was incompatible with breastfeeding and would pass through breastmilk. I was freaked! I explained the situation to ds (3.5) ,that we'd have to not have "sleepy juice " for a week while Mommy took this medicine. He said it was fine. Well, I figured that would last until bedtime. But as it turned out he really was fine and settled for "skin"(tummy to tummy) as his comfort to go to sleep. I was amazed. It helped that he's recently given up naps so he's really exhausted when he goes down. I bought a pump the next day but after 45 minutes I got not one lousy drop! Did I dry up that fast? I was heartbroken to think that this was it. That weaning had been thrust onto us so ubruptly and that I would have to tell him that the weeks break had turned into several months until the baby came.I thought he'd feel betrayed. He was fine when I told him. I got onto one of the boards and asked some advice only to hear that they all have taken Macrobid while breastfeeding with no problems.I decided not to say anything more to ds until I knew for sure what was going on.On Monday I called the nurse and she said that all the inserts say that and that it was fine to take the Macrobid while nursing but since he'd weaned so easily and I wasn't having any engorgement that I could just be grateful it went so well. I'm going to be 40 in October and the idea that all my body's resources could now be channeled to the growing baby (due in Feb) sounded pretty good, especially since he really did seem to be coping quite well. So I didn't say anything to him about trying to start up again,even though the ladies on my board thought it was possible still. I still plan to let him decide if he wants to have it again after the new baby comes. He's chosen to sleep in his own bed almost all the time lately, although he still wants me to lay down with him until he falls asleep. I decided to wear a bra explaining to him that I didn't want us to be sleepy and forget that we weren't supposed to have the sleepy juice. This morning, it's been a week since weaning and he came to our bed to get me and then asked for "skin" when I lay down with him.I was so sleepy, I forgot the bra,but when he snuggled up to me he said, "see MaMa, I didn't pop on." (meaning he didn't forget) I'm so proud of my little guy and so releived it's gone so well. I wanted to share this story here since officially, in my book, he's just on sabbatical from nursing until he tells me he's done for good! We'll see after the new baby comes.
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Old 09-28-2003, 07:31 PM
 
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That sounds great, Jeanne!

One thing that comes to mind when reading your story is that maybe there hadn't been any milk for a while, or very, very little? My dd is in the process of weaning and I didn't realize until after it had been happening for a while (don't know how long) that often, even when she was latched on, she wasn't getting any milk. The only way I can tell now is if I ask her (and she is not the most reliable source) or to pull the nipple out and see if a tiny drop of milk beads.

At any rate, even when there isn't milk, I know she finds comfort in "nursing" (human pacifier), and the ease with which your ds switched to "skin" makes me wonder if perhaps he had been getting comfort from that rather than from milk per se for a while.
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Old 10-03-2003, 05:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My daughter (6.5yrs) has gone 4 nights without nursing so far! For a long time I've been offering her a choice at bedtime (tickle, massage, or nurse) and until recently she almost always chose to nurse. But for the past 4 nights she chose tickle or massage. She surprised me, and I think she has surprised herself too . I am so glad I have trusted her needs and chose to take this path, this just feels so right. This is the way I wanted it: no trauma, no sadness, no struggles, no tricking or lying, no engorgement. I know that she will probably go back and forth for a while (thanks to Firemom's sharing of her experience ) and I am perfectly fine with that. This is just a huge step for us! She has been on the plateau of nursing just at night (almost every night) for almost 2 years now.


Firemom, did you experience any hormonal changes (emotional or physical)? I am guessing there won't be any because it has happened so gradually, my milk supply has gradually and naturally decreased, so any upsets are not expected...


Mother_Sunshine
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Old 10-03-2003, 09:56 PM
 
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Here is some good info on nursing while pg.

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/tandem/faq/index.html

Quote:
Well my OB says I need to wean my 3yo soon since breastfeeding could trigger early labor later on. I just shined her on of course but have no intention of stopping, and I guarantee neither does 3yo! Can anyone just assure me that it will be ok to keep going. I know I have heard it is, but how can doctors be so positive about what they think will happen?
How can drs act so sure? I think they learn that attitdue in med school. But human lactation and infant nutrition, they do not study!!!
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Old 10-03-2003, 11:26 PM
 
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Orgasm triggers far stronger contractions than breastfeeding does, especially when you're talking about a 3yo. If your doc says you can't have sex, then you need to wean. Otherwise, you shouldn't have to worry about it. Geez, like you wouldn't notice serious contractions yourself!

I am fortunate to have found a very pro-homebirth doc in a state where direct entry midwifery is illegal and CNMs don't do homebirth. I looked him in the eye and said, "I am still nursing my 3yo. If it causes excessive contractions, I will be in touch." And he said okay. He really believes that I am in charge of my own health, and he will help when invited. I'm not sure he had ever met a nursing 3yo before, but he was willing to trust my judgment.
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Old 10-04-2003, 08:11 AM
 
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Hi - I just thought I'd stop by here. My dd1 (4 years old this month) is almost - I think - finished with nursing. I have a newborn (almost 4 weeks old), and dd1 has only asked to nurse twice since he was born.

She'll often comment that she's old enough that she doens't need to nurse - I think she's beginning to see nursing as something that babies/younger children do? (I have a 2.5 year old dd who is nursing a lot now that my milk has come back in!)

Anyway - it will be interesting to see how it all plays out. The two times she has nursed, it has been at bedtime, but most of the time, we just sit and talk for a few minutes before she goes to sleep (that is her routine when dh puts her to bed, so that's what she's started to do with me as well).

I'm so glad her weaning has been (still is?) gradual - and I really appreciate having this thread here, to know that I'm not alone in nursing an older child.

Thanks, Mamas!
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Old 10-04-2003, 05:04 PM
 
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Mother_sunshine and dd-
what an awesome description. huge hugs. I am so happy you and your dd are having such a sweet nursing change.

If she weans will you have a nursing party?

Is anyone else planning on a weaning party?
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Old 10-04-2003, 06:04 PM
 
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No I didn't have any hormonal changes just sadness because of change. I was happy and sad that she weaned, I think you know what I mean. It's just an end to something that mom and child experienced together for so long and it was like having a secret (for lack of a better word) that no one else could share.

It's still nice between us. We read most nights in bed and she cuddles and pats my breasts and even pretend nurses over my pj's and talks very fondly of nursing.
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Old 10-05-2003, 04:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you Spryte! I told my daughter that after 2 weeks we will have a little family party to celebrate.

It's been 6 nights now without nursing.....BUT yesterday afternoon she asked to nurse, I said okay, and she nursed for a short time then laughed and said that she is forgetting how. She willingly went to bed with dh the last 2 nights. Tonight she asked to nurse, I said okay, but then she changed her mind and happily went off to bed. We'll see what happens the next time I put her to bed...

Firemom, Yes I do know what you mean. I am starting to feel a little bit of sadness....actually it's starting right now after reading your heartfelt post....I think sadness and possible feelings of loss will come when I know she's completely finished. I am happy and proud of how weaning has gradually happened, but I will miss nursing her. We'll move on to other special times together though. Our latest thing is to sing songs together for bedtime (I have a feeling this will stay a while too).

Who was it here at MDC who said:

Quote:
"The phrase 'extended nursing' should be stricken from the language, so that there is simply...nursing.
'Extended' implies a 'stretching out' of something--I haven't stretched out my children's nursing time, I've just met their needs."
I love that quote.

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