never expected weaning to be such an emotional experience - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 04-01-2003, 12:55 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I just feel I need to post. I nursed my 18 month old son for the last time two weeks and 10 hours ago. He is doing really well. I weaned him because I am 17 wks pregnant and just couldn't do it anymore. Since weaning him I have felt almost like I am in mourning. I can't seem to talk about it with anyone IRL because everyone seems to feel I should just be happy to be 'free' of nursing. I don't feel 'free' - I feel sad. My son is such a little darling - now to go to sleep at night he cradles my bare tummy (needs to be without clothing!) and cuddles me to sleep.

I know I will get over this sadness, but I am just finding it hard.

Emma
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#2 of 7 Old 04-01-2003, 04:19 AM
 
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I so feel for you. I wonder if I may be in this position because we are considering TTC and I have had low supply almost Dd's entire life, and I'm not sure it's realistic to think that I'll have enough milk for one baby, much less two.

Dh thinks it may be best for me to wean, and if I notice no breast changes as I did with my first pregnancy, he may be right. I get sad just thinking of it.

Can you share how you did it? I can't imagine weaning Dd right now, she gets frantic if she gets put off for too long.
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#3 of 7 Old 04-01-2003, 05:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Curious how old is your daughter? How often does she nurse at the moment? Does she nurse during hte night? I will write back when I read your answers.


EMma
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#4 of 7 Old 04-02-2003, 11:09 AM
 
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Dd is 19-1/2 months. She nurses on awakening in the morning, midmorning, for nap, awakening from nap, evening, after bath, to sleep, and probably at least once during the night between 4 and 6AM, sometimes on and off, sometimes for what feels like the full 2 hours. All that, and whenever else she pleases. Nursing sessions can last 1 minute to 30 (in the sling while I'm cleaning).

Sometimes she forgets one session, or can't do midmorning because I'm working. When she sees me, or remembers that she missed one, she's very eager to get back to business. If she decides she wants to nurse and can't immediately (like in the parking lot after Dh gets me from yoga class), she cries like crazy.
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#5 of 7 Old 04-02-2003, 06:54 PM
 
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I know it must be so hard - ds was on a nursing strike for a week and I pumped and had to feed him first by dropper and then by bottle. It was awful, I was an emotional mess. If he tried to nurse or I offered and he'd refuse I'd be quickly reduced to tears. It was really horrible! I know that weaning isn't a sudden stoppage, but it still seems like it would be a sad thing - after all that wonderful closeness!
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#6 of 7 Old 04-04-2003, 12:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Owensmum - it has made me a wreck. That said, I am starting to feel better. My son has started cuddling me more and I think the fact that we cosleep definately helps. I still miss nursing though.

Curious - I weaned my son in stages. When he was almost 12 months, we did a nightwean. I stopped nursing him from 11:00 pm until around 4:30 am. Slowly, very slowly, he started to nurse to sleep around 8:00 pm and then not nurse until around 5:00 am. At that time, he basically nursed every other hour of the day. Around Christmas time I started following "don't offer, don't refuse". It didn't really help much -- he still nursed from 5:00 am - 7:00 am (basically latched on the whole time), again around 9:00 am, 10:30 am, 12:30 pm, 1:30 pm, 3:00 pm, 5:30 pm, from 7:00 - 7:45 pm (his whole time in the bath!), and then again before bed!!! Slowly, again very slowly, he started to cut out a few. Until about a month ago, he was nursing about the same amount of times as your daughter. I finally decided I had had it. I was really suffering due to my pregnancy and awful blisters.... We nursed for the last time on Mar 18. I have written a lot - maybe too many details. If you have any questions, please pm me.

Hugs,

Emma
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#7 of 7 Old 04-04-2003, 12:40 PM
 
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Thanks Emma,

Today Dd is very clingy and eager to nurse, after a hard day at the photographer yesterday (she hates him!). So I'm better able to cope if I don't think about the future at all. Thanks for the details - it's helpful to hear.
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