Do you Cover up when NIP? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums
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#61 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 12:09 AM
 
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Almost always no. The other day I put a jacket over us to shield the sun from his eyes and so he could nap with out all the stimulation that was going on. He often wont eat when we are out in public.

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#62 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 12:10 AM
 
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No, partially because I want to contribute to making breastfeeding seem "normal" to the general public and partially because I am not coordinated enough! I am more self conscious about my belly than anything but I usually angle myself to expose that as little as possible.
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#63 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 12:18 AM
 
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I think it hurts the cause in that it just strengthens the anomosity those who are anti-NIP feel towards people who NIP and makes people take us less seriously, dismissing us as militant boob-nazis spouting a bunch of hullaballoo.

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#64 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 12:31 AM
 
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I never liked the term "NIP~ nursing in public". Of course we NIP, I eat in public, don't you? Why is it any different? We could have a new saying, "EIP".



I just think babies need to nurse when and where they need to nurse and adults need to get over themselves and finally see what a beautiful and natural thing breastfeeding really is.

~Joan, Happy mom to 2 beautiful kiddos, one new puppy and 2 lovely felines
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#65 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:14 AM
 
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I like to flash my cervix. And my kids are both done nursing. I just do it for nostalgia.
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#66 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:55 AM
 
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I like to flash my cervix. And my kids are both done nursing. I just do it for nostalgia.
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#67 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 02:46 AM
 
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Well, yes, 99% of the time I'm NIPing my nipple is covered by the baby's head/mouth. So you could say I cover up.
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#68 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 03:41 AM
 
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Not usually - both my DC would just throw the blanket off (without warning usually) so I'd end up more exposed than without one. But I do prefer not to have my breasts and tummy exposed in general - so I try to plan my wardrobe accordingly.

I think this issue is more about the whole "BF, but be discreet" thing which really imposes anti-BF/anti-woman/anti-mothering judgements on women in the guise of politeness. As you soon as you 'require' discretion, you leave discretion in the eye of the observer, who isn't always a friendly party.

Frankly, I think most mothers would prefer not to expose their breasts and bellies (most not all), but also that their baby's hunger trumps that preference. Most people also prefer not to make others uncomfortable, but I'm not going to make my child uncomfortable because of ill-placed prudishness.

So, no, I don't think a mother should give a sh** and I think that's the healthiest approach. I don't think that it hurts the cause - it says my child's needs trump my preference for modesty and your hang-ups.

ETA: I don't think the tall person analogy really works: a tall person who sits in the front row is being inconsiderate of others because their tallness interferes with people being able to do what they came to the theatre to do (watch the movie). A nursing mother who flusters someone and causes them not to enjoy their outing is not being inconsiderate because there is nothing about *her* behaviour that actually interferes with the person's ability to enjoy the movie. A better analogy would be a racist/homophobe being unable to enjoy the movie because an interracial or gay couple is sitting next to them: they could be very uncomfortable and very unable to concentrate on the movie, but NO ONE (except racists/homophobes) would say that the couple should move to make them comfortable. KWIM?

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#69 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 05:07 AM
 
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I guess my answer would be "kinda". I wear nursing tops when we're out, so no skin is visible when I'm nursing. I think most people think my son is just sleeping.

I tried to use a nursing cover once, and it was silly. My son thought it was hilarious and wanted to lift it and play with it, so its purpose was immediately defeated.
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#70 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 09:45 AM
 
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How does one NIP politely I wonder?
I dont think you should change your nursing style, I also don tthink you should cover up. But I do think alot of bf'ers could be a little bit more compassionate towards people who dont understand and mabye try changing their poor attitudes instead of feeling "wronged" all the time.

Keep in mind that most people were taught way back when that mothers milk is for poor people and its not as good as formula. Most people who are offended have no idea how good it is for the baby and mama. They are very ignorant.

Its like reverse predjudice. to have a crappy attitude towards people who dont understand.

If you are being attacked, I understand....but it seems like we develop these attitudes based on other people being attached, etc. Brush it off, keep going, try not to get too defensive.
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#71 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 09:49 AM
 
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I never liked the term "NIP~ nursing in public". Of course we NIP, I eat in public, don't you? Why is it any different? We could have a new saying, "EIP".

.
It is a different issue to alot of people. Mabye not to bf'ers but you cant be in total denial that its an issue.

Mabye a silly issue, mabye a stupid one, but nusring in public is a big deal. Hence the huge article in mothering a couple of months ago.

You really dont know why there is a seperate term?:
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#72 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 09:51 AM
 
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I think this issue is more about the whole "BF, but be discreet" thing which really imposes anti-BF/anti-woman/anti-mothering judgements on women in the guise of politeness. As you soon as you 'require' discretion, you leave discretion in the eye of the observer, who isn't always a friendly party.
Women who prefer to be modest are NOT anti-bf. That is an absolutley rediculous statment.
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#73 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 10:09 AM
 
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Women who prefer to be modest are NOT anti-bf. That is an absolutley rediculous statment.
She did not say that women who prefer to be modest are anti bf (and what the hell does that mean anyways- I am certainly not being immodest when I NIP.) Perhaps you should reread. She said telling women to be discreet when they nip is anti bf and it most certainly is.

You actually think it is reverse prejudice to not care what anti nip think or are offended? Are you serious? :


So if someone is offended by me holding another woman's hand walking down the street, I should care and try not to make them so offended?

This leaps of "logic" in this thread are astounding and disheartening to see on mdc.

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#74 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 10:44 AM
 
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Women who prefer to be modest are NOT anti-bf. That is an absolutley rediculous statment.
No, but women (and men) who prefer *all the other women to fit in their definition of modesty* are not exactly helping the cause of breastfeeding. The constant call for modesty reinforces the idea that "immodest" nursing is somehow bad for society.

I just finished a weekend with the ILs. SIL bf's her 8 month old baby but you would *never* know. She quietly excuses herself and went up to her bedroom with the door closed. Now, that's of course her own perogative. But, other SIL (who married into this family like me) did recall that I just bf'd my kids at the dinner table and how normal that seemed--I think she was appreciative of that (I've broken in some of the older family members). She was surprised SIL was so secretive about her bfing.

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#75 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 10:47 AM
 
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If you were my SIL, you would think I was secretive as well. Having a baby and getting to escape frequently from family gatherings is the best thing I ever did. When my FIL starts getting on my nerves (which is frequent ), oh, wow, the baby is suddenly hungry. And, it takes him forever to nurse. :

I'm not like that all the time. I just reserve the escaping into the bedroom for my inlaws. LOL
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#76 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 10:54 AM
 
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Oh, yeah, I get that. And I've done it (escaped family time by claiming it was nursing time). It's just, really, unless you asked you would never know she bf'd.

My point is that "high profile" nursers have their place too and often are furthering the cause in their own way. When I had nurslings, I nursed whenever and wherever and however. My life was very very busy and I didn't always have time to stop. My youngest was a champ at nursing in the sling and would do so on every errand we went on. As she got older, she would nurse with her hands holding my breasts and take breaks to look around. Lots of people have seen my nipples. What's the big deal?

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#77 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:14 PM
 
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My point is that "high profile" nursers have their place too and often are furthering the cause in their own way.
Yeah, certainly. Just not ones who have bad attitudes!

(Not directed at you.)

My point is-do what you think is right, but dont be a total ass about it. The people who are offended have just as much of a right to have their opinion as you do to have yours.
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#78 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:15 PM
 
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Oh yeah, coz I know soooo many hostile nursing mothers with bad attitudes. We just sit around nursing our babes and scowling at passers-by. :
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#79 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:18 PM
 
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guerrilla nursing.
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#80 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:20 PM
 
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Oh yeah, coz I know soooo many hostile nursing mothers with bad attitudes. We just sit around nursing our babes and scowling at passers-by. :
Thats what it sounds like!
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#81 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:21 PM
 
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Thats what it sounds like!
To you. Never neglect to notice the filter.
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#82 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:21 PM
 
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How does one be a total ass while nursing in public? : Anyone is entitled to any opinion they want. They are not entitled to respect for their opinion.

Anti nip attitudes are misogynistic. I do not respect that just like I don't respect racism, classism, etc.

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#83 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:30 PM
 
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I bring a red pop up tent everywhere I go with "warning breastfeeding" spraypainted (by dh) on all sides...works for me.
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#84 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:31 PM
 
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Quote by transformed:

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I dont think you should change your nursing style, I also don tthink you should cover up. But I do think alot of bf'ers could be a little bit more compassionate towards people who dont understand and mabye try changing their poor attitudes instead of feeling "wronged" all the time.
can you provide evidence to back up your assumptions that "alot" of breastfeeders are not compassionate enough and feel "wronged" all the time without following that with an attempt to change attitudes?

I see just the opposite. Women nurse in public, are discriminated against, and act to change what happened. (whether with words or letters or just the simple act of continuing to nurse)

Others just simply dont say or do ANYTHING-- thus, they are neither lacking in compassion or guilty of "feeling wronged all the time."

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#85 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:36 PM
 
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Oh yeah, coz I know soooo many hostile nursing mothers with bad attitudes. We just sit around nursing our babes and scowling at passers-by. :
I think this false assumption that so many people have (that there exists this large group of hostile breastfeeding moms just waiting to snap at you) has been perpetuated by anti breastfeeding groups.

And when people, such as those in this thread who think this fictionally large group exists, spread the myth along, THEY are the ones hurting the cause.

For example, recently with the Applebee's discrimination of a nursing mom. She had the laws for her state in her purse and showed them to the manager when he threatened her with having to leave. Comments to the story pointed this out and said she was hostile and had an agenda. It's people like that, who spread the myth and incriminate breastfeeding mothers, who hurt the cause.

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#86 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:43 PM
 
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OK, Iv'e been facetious on this thread. What I really do (although, iamama, the pup-tent is a grand idea!!) is I wear a big poncho and I carry sawed-off shotguns underneath. If anyone so much as looks at me sideways it's goodnight charlie.

Seriously, I can't believe nursing mothers are asked to 'be more compassionate" of annoyed strangers. Where does compassion fit into this exactly? I think nursing a child is one of the greatest acts of selflessness if a woman makes that choice. It is completely misogynistic to give women a hard time for it. Or to act as if it's something dirty that should be hidden away. My boobs are just flesh-covered orbs that deliver milk to my child when I'm lactating. My entire body is sensual at times and I'm not about to cover that up lest I should offend someone with my sensual hotness. So if they can't handle seeing 2 inches of flesh that happens to be close to my nipple and raise a stink about it, they'll require compassionate care when I'm through with them. Don't worry transformed, I'm kidding. (sort of)
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#88 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:52 PM
 
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Nope My dd's 2 1/2, I'm discreet, but don't cover up.
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#89 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 01:55 PM
 
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I honestly do worry about discreet, (like I'm careful too much of my tittie isn't sticking out), but damn I resent that. Like, it's a child sucking on a boob. What is soooo offensive about that? I find I get pissed that I have to be inhibited, and pass on those inhibitions to my daughter (in the form of "Dont lift up mama's shirt! No, I'll nurse you when we get home") to prevent us both having to deal with unfounded social BS.
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#90 of 99 Old 10-16-2007, 02:14 PM
 
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Originally Posted by miche28 View Post
I think this issue is more about the whole "BF, but be discreet" thing which really imposes anti-BF/anti-woman/anti-mothering judgements on women in the guise of politeness. As you soon as you 'require' discretion, you leave discretion in the eye of the observer, who isn't always a friendly party.

Frankly, I think most mothers would prefer not to expose their breasts and bellies (most not all), but also that their baby's hunger trumps that preference. Most people also prefer not to make others uncomfortable, but I'm not going to make my child uncomfortable because of ill-placed prudishness.

So, no, I don't think a mother should give a sh** and I think that's the healthiest approach. I don't think that it hurts the cause - it says my child's needs trump my preference for modesty and your hang-ups.
ITA.

I don't set out to upset people or make them uncomfortable, and I certainly don't want my belly jiggle flopping all over the place for everyone to see, but when it comes down to it I feel it is far more important to meet my child's needs.

And as I said before, if you don't like it, don't look.

It's sad that anyone would think that NIP hurts the bfing cause. It's a perfectly natural thing to do and as several other people have mentioned it is not up to the mother to make society comfortable. The mother's job is to meet her child's needs, and if in doing so other people are uncomfortable, then so be it.
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