Wow! People really feel they have the right to comment about NIP, huh? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So I have NIP with DD (4 weeks) once before but I was covered up which was a total pain because she had a hard time keeping the latch when I couldn't see her, probably because I was not concious of how I was holding her since I couldn't see her.

So today I had my PP appt. at the hospital. My appt was at 11:00 but because they were super backed up I didn't even get in until like 11:45, so by the time we got out DD was HUNGRY. I went to the first floor where there is a "lactation station", I figured they would probably have some comfy chairs and I could nurse her in there before driving home. Well it was closed, apparently it is only open until 12:00 But there was an area right there by it with a bunch of chairs. It is a high traffic area because it is right by the entrance but I didn't care, so I just sat down and nursed her. I didn't cover up because I didn't want to deal with latch issues related to me not being able to see her. But I had a nursing tank on and really I didn't feel very exposed. So anyway, in the 20 minutes or so we received these comments:

1. Elderly lady "That's precious just precious."
2. Another elderly lady "Oh look at that little baby, good on you love" (she had an accent, I think she was Australian)
3. Two women, one teenageish, the other late 30's ish as they are walking by the 30ish one says "Did you see that? That's DISGUSTING!"
4. A family of a middle aged man, woman and teenage son. The father says "What do you guys think of that?" the mother says "If you don't like it close your eyes".

and drum roll please, my "favorite"

I wasn't looking up so I am not sure but about 4 women, I think 3 of them were teenagers, the other one a grown woman, the grown woman says right in front of me "You need to cover up! That ain't everyones business! That's nasty!" Did I mention one of them was carrying a baby in a car seat?

I choose to ignore her 100%, I didn't even look at her. But really, WTF? There was no more of my breast showing then what you see hanging out of many women's low cut tops.

This won't stop me from NIP, I could give a rat's booty if people are so "disgusted" by me feeding my baby.

Jenna in love with my DH Jon, loving our 2.5 year old, Caroline Tulip, and expecting another little one in August!
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#2 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:22 PM
 
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Same here.. If they dont like it dont look.... Im willing to guess that the woman with the stupid comment used the car seat to prop bottles..
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#3 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:26 PM
 
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You have a great attitude. I'm sorry you had to put up with that. I'm glad it won't deter you from NIP, but it sure isn't fun.
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#4 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:29 PM
 
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Yeah really...if you don't like it, lump it!
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#5 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:31 PM
 
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It's great that you got some positive comments!
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#6 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Maybe I am just weird but I felt like laughing. I was just saying to myself "Wait? Are you serious? You look at me breastfeeding and you are so shocked and appalled you feel moved to tell me how disgusting and nasty it is? Well okay then " I mean really, it was absurd.

Maybe because I am blessed to come from a very pro-BFing family, it just seems so abnormal to me that people would let themselves get so crazy out of shape over breastfeeding.

Jenna in love with my DH Jon, loving our 2.5 year old, Caroline Tulip, and expecting another little one in August!
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#7 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh yes and I meant to say that, it was great that some people were so positive and encouraging! I also got a few smiles.

Jenna in love with my DH Jon, loving our 2.5 year old, Caroline Tulip, and expecting another little one in August!
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#8 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Khourtniey View Post
Im willing to guess that the woman with the stupid comment used the car seat to prop bottles..

Just because she had her child in a car seat & made a really rude comment about NIP does not mean that she bottle props. Her comment was completely uncalled for & I would have had a hard time holding my tongue but making assumptions about her is kinda rude too.
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#9 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 07:46 PM
 
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Just remember when you NIP you help make bfing more *normal* to everyone that sees it. Good for you
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#10 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 10:59 PM
 
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Just because she had her child in a car seat & made a really rude comment about NIP does not mean that she bottle props. Her comment was completely uncalled for & I would have had a hard time holding my tongue but making assumptions about her is kinda rude too.
Well then I must be rude.
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#11 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 11:06 PM
 
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Originally Posted by JennaW View Post

I wasn't looking up so I am not sure but about 4 women, I think 3 of them were teenagers, the other one a grown woman, the grown woman says right in front of me "You need to cover up! That ain't everyones business! That's nasty!" Did I mention one of them was carrying a baby in a car seat?

I choose to ignore her 100%, I didn't even look at her. But really, WTF? There was no more of my breast showing then what you see hanging out of many women's low cut tops..
I'm so not surprised. People can be so ignorant. I don't think I would have been able to ignore that one.

Once, while at my cousin's graduation party, I was sitting at the kitchen table with my sister and another woman who was a stranger. I knew I was in for it. Naiah got hungry so I went ahead and began nursing her. The woman looks at me and says loudly "Are you breastfeeding her?" Kind of like she would have said "Are you feeding your baby poison?". I looked over at her sweetly and said "Yes?" She says to me "That's nasty. I think breastfeeding is nasty". What class. I replied something about how natural it is although I was fuming. I didn't say what I wanted to say which was "Well you're ignorant" which would have been so justified and right on target as well as tit for tat. The gall of people sometimes.

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#12 of 45 Old 08-15-2008, 11:47 PM
 
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Oye, I can't imagine. But it sounds like you recieved more positive than negative comments, which is great!

As for the bfing is "nasty" comments, I'm coming up with quips right now. My favorite at the moment?

Rude stranger: "I think breastfeeding is nasty."

Me: "I think breast cancer is nasty. I'm trying to avoid it."

><> I'm a Christian, knitting, sewing, cooking SAHM to the fearless adventurer Jack born 11/08, and  a  USCG wife
And we are joyfully awaiting a new addition in April 2011! <><
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#13 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 12:47 AM
 
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Originally Posted by JennaW View Post
the grown woman says right in front of me "You need to cover up! That ain't everyones business! That's nasty!"
"And YOU need to mind your own business - how I feed my child is none of YOUR business for sure! That's tactless!"
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#14 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 01:46 AM
 
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what kind of person walks up to a woman and her baby and tells them they are "nasty"??? could you imagine if every BF mom walked up to every FF mom and said, "Is that formula? that's nasty!"???

Or just walking up to someone eating fast food or something and saying, "that's nasty!"

who does that??? why is it ok to say it to a BF mom??? (it's not, but who would think it is?)
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#15 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 04:55 AM
 
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Originally Posted by white_queen_22 View Post
"And YOU need to mind your own business - how I feed my child is none of YOUR business for sure! That's tactless!"
I wouldn't have been so polite.

My snark would probably have been, "I'll tell you what's nasty -- that wide butt of yours. Now that's nasty!"

But um. I really try to hold my tongue 'cause I don't want to get beat up.

Sometimes I don't hold my tongue though.
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#16 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 05:27 AM
 
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She's right, it's not everyone's business, including hers. So she should have kept her mouth shut.
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#17 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 06:08 AM
 
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My canned response is a total UAV, but it's short, sweet, gets my point across, and rolls off the tongue easily. Don't be afraid to use your 4 letter words, betchu she won't ever say anything to a bfing woman again!
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#18 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 10:04 AM
 
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You got half positive comments, so that wasn't terrible.

I only ever got positive comments. Pissed me off, as I was so prepared with all my wonderful comebacks, and I never got to use them. I must either live in a decent area or I have a vibe!
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#19 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 01:34 PM
 
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Too bad about the negativity.

I was at the pool while my bigs had swim lessons, and when I began nursing my babe, the lady next to me actually got up and moved.

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#20 of 45 Old 08-16-2008, 03:53 PM
 
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Wow. Maybe it's a "British reserve" thing, but in the last 7 weeks we've had boobie in an Ikea cafe, the waiting area at our doctor's surgery, on foot dancing to a samba band at a street festival, in the outdoor area of a bar, at the mall, at my old job, at my husband's work, in a local cafe, in a local library, at the park... and nobody's even looked our way. Mind you, I have been told in the past that I look intimidating so perhaps nobody dares!

Like Irishmommy, I usually start preparing great comebacks to use as a just in case, and never get the opportunity. I guess I'd better consider that a blessing??
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#21 of 45 Old 08-17-2008, 06:50 PM
 
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3 out of 5 comments were positive -- that's a good thing! I'm sorry you got some negative ones too -- it's bizarre that people can't keep their traps shut about stuff like that.

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#22 of 45 Old 08-17-2008, 06:56 PM
 
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Wow, Jenna. The nasty comment was so uncalled for, but unfortunately that seems to be what people teach their kids.
What the heck do they think boobs are for?

Lucky wife to DH and mom to DS (10/02) and sweet DD (7/08) and DSD (3/93) and assorted animalia
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#23 of 45 Old 08-17-2008, 06:56 PM
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Originally Posted by MilkTrance View Post
I wouldn't have been so polite.

My snark would probably have been, "I'll tell you what's nasty -- that wide butt of yours. Now that's nasty!"

But um. I really try to hold my tongue 'cause I don't want to get beat up.

Sometimes I don't hold my tongue though.
i love you
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#24 of 45 Old 08-17-2008, 07:06 PM
 
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What the heck do they think boobs are for?
The Jonas Brothers.
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#25 of 45 Old 08-17-2008, 07:10 PM
 
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"I think bottle feeding a baby is a nasty habit that should take place only in a bathroom." - Dr. Robert S. Mendelsohn M.D., LLLI Medical Advisor.

Honestly!

My sister was at a shopping mall on an escalator going up and she looked up, only to see that the passenger ahead and above her, a young teenage girl wearing a very short skirt, had no underwear on. Not a stitch. This is supposed to be a fashion statement.

Breastfeeding which is normal and natural, should be covered up....our culture is screwed up.

"The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie, deliberate, contrived and dishonest, but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic."
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#26 of 45 Old 08-17-2008, 07:17 PM
 
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Good for you for NIP.
Shame on them for the nasty "bfing is nasty" comments.
Shame on the facility for only happening the lounge where you might nurse in PEACE shielded from such remarks!
good that you had the opportunity to show how natural and loving it is.
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#27 of 45 Old 08-17-2008, 07:18 PM
 
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I consider NIP to be an act of public service - hooray for you, normalizing breastfeeding! :

What's really nasty is accosting a complete stranger with rude language. Sorry you ran into such a UAV. I would have been tempted to squirt her in the eye...

Cindy, part-time family doc, full-time Mommy to Jared (2/04) and Connor (2/08) :
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#28 of 45 Old 08-18-2008, 12:41 AM
 
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Originally Posted by MilkTrance View Post
My snark would probably have been, "I'll tell you what's nasty -- that wide butt of yours. Now that's nasty!"
Boy, I hope everyone reading this thread has a svelte rear end!

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#29 of 45 Old 08-18-2008, 02:23 PM
 
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How about...

"Have you ever tasted formula? Now that's some nasty stuff!"



I'm sorry you got some rude comments. I've never had anyone say anything but nice things to me while NIP, and I'm really shocked that people think it's okay to say things like that.
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#30 of 45 Old 08-18-2008, 02:35 PM
 
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Isn't it sad how it is women who are are own biggest critics?

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Face the rear for MORE than a year! Toddlers' necks are safest in a rear facing carseat
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