Siblings at Birth? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 11-08-2004, 11:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Have any of you experienced moms had your older children with you at a homebirth? What ages, and how did they do? We are thinking about our 6 and 4 year olds, wondering how it would be for them.

Thanks!

Ellen
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#2 of 9 Old 11-09-2004, 10:55 AM
 
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My oldest daughter Michayla is 5 years old now, but, at the time that her little sister Michenzie was born she was only 4 almost 5... She was in the hospital room with me the entire time... She watched the whole birthing process and then she was the first one to hold her little sister.. You've never seen a kid so in love as we all saw when Michayla held Michenzie the first time.. I truly believe that the reason my little girls are so close is because Michayla has a connection with her... She was there for all of my doctor appointments.. including ultrasound.. and she always looked sooo forward to getting to hear Chenzies heartbeat...

With this baby, unfortunately Michayla can't be there for every single appointment because she's in Kindergarten now.. But, she will deffinetly be in the room for the birth of this one, and this time she is going to help Daddy cut the cord... When I gave birth to my youngest Michayla even stayed in the post partum room with me and helped me take care of Michenzie.. Such a great big sister right from the start...

Good luck with whatever you decide to do


Keri-22
DH Dennis-37
DD Michayla 09/25/99
DD Michenzie 08/29/03
D? Edd 05/13/05
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#3 of 9 Old 11-09-2004, 11:36 AM
 
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I've thought about having my now 4yo (she'll be about one month away from 5 when the baby is born) there, but the only thing I worry about is having her witness something stressful- things got really tense just before my 2nd dd was born (she was in distress and we had lots of people running around). It would have really scared Kaylee if she had seen that. I'd love her to be there (my other one will be 2 and could probably care less :LOL), but if things get hairy, I want to protect her from that, kwim? It's a hard one. She would be over the moon to be the first one to hold the baby, though

Half-marathon running Mommy to 3 spunky girls and 1 sweet boy. Spending my days and nights where my kids need me most- at home with them!!

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#4 of 9 Old 11-09-2004, 11:49 AM
 
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We are planning a HB so when Im pushing I will get DS to come into the room. He will be almost 3 then and I think it would be a beautiful expereience.
I don't want him there for all the contractions and such I just think it would be a disstraction for me and not so great for him so see his mamma like that.

Amanda, wife to Ed mama to Logan, Phoenix, Indigo and snuggle bunny EZRA RAIN has arrived
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#5 of 9 Old 11-09-2004, 02:15 PM
 
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*

may my heart always be open to little birds who are the secrets of living whatever they sing is better than to know  - e.e. cummings
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#6 of 9 Old 11-09-2004, 02:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks Jess, and everyone else. What helpful thoughts! I think it will be great, as long as family can be around to make sure their needs are met (i.e. take them out if it gets too intense). It's part of the reason we decided on our first homebirth for our last (#3) birth. While the kids could be at our hospital, I think it would add additonal anxiety for them. White Coat Syndrome is very real for our kids :-)

Ciao,

Ellen
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#7 of 9 Old 11-09-2004, 04:01 PM
 
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We are planning a home birth for this baby. My ds will be seven and we are planning on him attending. His uncle will be there for him. He has been to our first midwife appointment and the second one is on thursday,he and dh are both going.

kathleen

There's nothing you can know that isn't known. ~ John Lennon
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#8 of 9 Old 11-10-2004, 01:24 AM
 
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we planned to have the two older boys there for Lucas' birth (they were 4 and 6) but I delivered at 35 weeks in the hosp, and I didn't want the kids there in case all was not well with the babe. We had prepared them for birth and especially my 4 year old was really excited about it, and they were super disapointed that they couldn't come.
This time they definately want to be there so we are crossing our fingers and toes for a full term home birth and everyone can stay home and be a part of it.

on another note I was at the birth of my second brother when I was four. My mom said I was excited and really participated they let me "catch " the baby with the dr's help. but really the only thing I remember is that my dad sharpened my pink pencil crayon on both ends so that I would stop asking him to do it so often I think it is really unlikely kids would be traumatized by a birth, if it is approached as a normal part of life.
crystal
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#9 of 9 Old 11-11-2004, 03:42 PM
 
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My children will be 7.5 & almost 11 at the time this baby is due. Both want to be present. I have worked in lactation and childbirth, and hence around pregnant mommies for a while now. The know how babies come out & how much work it is. I see my DD staying with me the whole time. I can see my DS wandering about. Both is fine. My DD wants to give the baby its first "bath" and weigh. My DS wants to cut the cord. I will have them come to my late prenatals. I have videos for them to watch. I hope that they will be prepared for what they will see. I also want them to know, they are free to leave if they want to.
Good luck in your decision!

Cristina - "If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded." Maya Angelou
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