Does late pregnancy cause you to hate DH? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 05-23-2005, 11:42 PM - Thread Starter
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Ok well maybe hate is not the right word and maybe it's all me (probably is) just being tired, sensitive and worn out....but I just want to be left alone and it's making me really irritable with DH...of course in the moment its the things he is doing that set me off and it isnt until I walk away that I think "omg what is wrong with me". I am only asking if this is even slightly a normality because this is just not how we are with each other, ever. I guess if anyone else is feeling remotely similar, join the bandwagon and vent your frustration here.....

I wish DH could just:

--Put his clothes away, hang them up or put them in the laundry when he takes them off rather than throw them on the floor. The closet is not the floor, especially considering last week I spent over four hours organizing everything in the closet to accomodate more space for his clothes to hopefully prevent the floor from soaking them up. Doesnt he realize IT HURTS TO BEND OVER and if I don't pick them up, he sure as heck isnt going to and I cant go into labor and effectively birth a baby with such a mess staring at me. :
--Um....I bend up and down to empty the dishwasher so that we don't have to have dirty dishes lining the counters and sink. Is it really that hard to open a door, slide a plate in the rack and then shut the door? Doesn't it make it easier for one to use the kitchen sink withOUT all the dishes in it? it easier to use a plate and then throw it in the sink so that I can bend over the dishwasher and put it away for you?
--Oh DH....when you take a dump that doesn't completely flush the first time, wouldn't it be considerate of the rest of the family to flush a second time to get rid of the remaining dump? Seeing as how I am nauseated 24/7 which has recently resulted in me vomiting at a moments notice, it would be real nice if I didnt have to hold my vomit in while I flush and clean the toilet first since I do have OCD issues with toilet to begin with.

Oh dear I could go on and on and on right now...I need to get a grip or something. Am I going crazy or is this even remotely close to being normal or common or something?
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#2 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 12:11 AM
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I think being late really makes one very sensitive. I would agree that your dh should be able to do these thing to help you out since it is really just picking up after himself. Tell dh what you need from him in a non threating way and he may just see the error of his ways. Good Luck I know how your feeling and it isn't fun. Out baby out!
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#3 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 12:18 AM
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I am super sensitive right now. Everything annoys me about everyone! LOL

I agree though that some of your DH's "habits" would annoy anyone let alone a 9month pregnant person who has a personal stake in what he is doing!

Something that helped my DH to learn to put the seat down was the fact that I reminded him that he was a role model for his sons and that they needed to know the respectful thing to do was to put it down.

Perhaps if you approach it like a need to teach the kids the right thing to do rather than an issue between the two of you it might help.

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#4 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 12:52 AM
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Yes, I have definately been more annoyed with my hubby even though he is being completely wonderful...

I find myself snapping at him over little things and then I feel bad because again, he is being so good and I am usually NOT like that at all!

Then I remind myself, I am creating human life after all... so he can take it for a few days :LOL
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#5 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 01:00 AM
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I'm not due in May, but I can relate to this... the last couple of weeks I've become horribly sensitive to everything my DH does (or doesn't) do... I snap at him whenever he lies down on the couch and only because it bugs me... no real *reason* to it... I hate when he breathes on me too... and he's always leaving little things laying around which used to not bug me so much, but now that it hurts to bend I just snap when I see it, etc... I just can't stand being around him lately... I still love him, just wish he wasn't always here for a while! ~laughs~
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#6 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 12:51 PM
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It's my son I'm snapping at more than DH, though he's getting some as well. I started taking EPO to balance out my hormones because of this. I just became a raging psycho again a couple of weeks ago. I just want to be left alone!

anna kiss partner to jon radical mama to aleks (8/02) and bastian (5/05)
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#7 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 05:28 PM
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I am not snapping with DH at all. In fact, I feel very close to him right now. What I am having a hard time with is my kids! Mostly my DD. She is also hormonal. Last night & this morning she is having meltdowns. I can not stand the attittude! On sunday trying to be helpful she ruined a basket of strawberries. That day I lost it & even cried over darn strawberries. Go Figure. Hormones. UGH!

Cristina - "If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded." Maya Angelou
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#8 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 05:49 PM
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Yup, irritable and snippy with everyone.
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#9 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 06:59 PM - Thread Starter
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Anna thanks for the heads up on the EPO...I remember mw mentioning this during my last pregnancy and my mother made a subtle reminder last week (probably was more of a direct hint :LOL ) so I got it out and started it again today. Hopefully this will help in the hormonal transition even after birth.
I totally get what you mean about the kids....DH isn't getting to me as much now as the kids are and I feel so bad about it. Everyone usually comments on how high of a patience level I have with them and that hasn't been the case the last day or so. DH and I really are alot closer now than ever, but the last few days I know I have been a bear. It really does help to know that I am not isolated in this however, and that I am not the only one who feels like a raging hormonal lunatic. *sigh* I feel like I should be locked away in my own private cage at the zoo for exotic hormonal animals. :LOL I want to feel normal again!
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#10 of 10 Old 05-24-2005, 09:06 PM
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My poor DH isn't doing half the things yours is, but he's probably getting snapped at just as much!

Honestly, I'm not generally one of those long-suffering wives who is willing to cut DH slack just because he happens to lack a second X chromosome. So in your place, I'd be angry with him over the laundry and toilet issues even without the discomfort and hormonal upheaval of late pregnancy. If my DH were to do those things now, I'd probably make "psycho" sound like a very mild state indeed!

He has already gotten an earful once or twice about the dishes (which makes him shape up for approximately 24 hours, then the counter is covered again), but I don't feel bad about that. What I feel bad about is yelling at him for little, incredibly stupid things that he really didn't know would inconvenience me. I nearly bit his head off yesterday for putting his underwear in the hamper INSTEAD of the laundry basket full of whites that was sitting on the bed, waiting for me to carry it down to the laundry room. Five minutes later I realized that he probably thought the stuff in the basket was clean and waiting to be folded (the usual situation for a laundry basket on the bed in our house). : Poor guy! He really is trying. Gotta think of a good father's-day/thanks-for-putting-up-with-me gift.

That was a really long way to say that you're not unreasonable to want him to clean up after himself, especially while you're so uncomfortable. And you're not the only one with a short fuse, so tell your DH he's just lucky he's not married to a real shrew like me.
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