I had very similar feelings when DS was born. I felt nothing for him. He didn't feel like my baby, just some stranger baby that I had to take care of. I also played the mental minds games of all the ways I could kill myself and all the ways DS could get hurt, even though I had no inclination to act upon them.
One of the first questions that any professional asks about possible ppd is whether you've had thoughts of hurting yourself or your baby, because it is one of the most common symptoms. I do not know about the laws, but I am pretty sure that CPS would not be called on you for admitting that.
I really hope that you can find a good counselor to help you. I never got the gumption up to talk to a professional, and it only made it harder on me and made the ppd last a much longer time than it had to.
Regarding bfing, have you talked to an LC? It's not necessarily too late to make bfing successful.
Please keep us posted on how you are doing.