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Big hug, mama!
I've been there, and yes, I survived. In fact, I've battled insomnia all my life and for years NEVER slept more than 4 hours a night. It was brutal when DS1 was born, since I couldn't just come home from work exhausted and crash on the couch... I had to be there and be alert for the sake of my baby. I'm not sure if the PPD exacerbated the insomnia, or if the insomnia led to PPD, but I wasn't in a happy place. Not once was I able to nap with the baby (I would just lie there staring into space...) and I literally wanted to strangle every single person who said "sleep when the baby sleeps...". I never took any drugs for insomnia either... Ok, enough with the pity party, here's what helped me stay (somewhat) sane:
-plenty of fresh air. I took looooong walks every day (2-3 hours, twice a day sometimes, even in the winter). I know with more than one child, it's harder, but now I put DS1 (3) in a stroller and carry DS2 in teh Ergo, and we happily walk for hours.
-start the day fresh. When you don't sleep, it can feel like the previous day never ended. Set a time every day (6 am, say) and tell yourself it's a brand new day and you'll make it through even though you've been awake since midnight.
-lose it from time to time. I would wallow in my own misery and wail, then pick myself up and just move on. Trying to keep it together all the time made me more miserable than giving myself permission to fall to pieces sometimes.
-try homeopathic meds. I personally didn't think they'd do much, but it made me feel proactive to at least try something. And lo and behold, I did actually sleep more when I took them.
-and finally, remember that it will get better, maybe not tomorrow or even next month, but you will get over this.
Oh, and yes, you can survive on literally no sleep for long periods of time. You may very well feel like crap and not be at your best, but you'll sleep again one day.
Hang in there - you are not alone!
You're not alone. I had absolutely debilitating insomnia off and on for the entire first year. In my case it turned out to be PTSD, so just be mindful that there are other possibilities than just PPD.
Once I was treated for PTSD (meds and therapy), I started sleeping again.
PP is right, it sucks and you will feel terrible--but this isn't forever; you will sleep again one day. Just try to get at the root of the problem--is it anxiety? depression? something physical (lack of exercise)?
I need some help!! I definatel;y have ppd and to top it off it comes for me with insomnia...it's like I completely lose teh ability to fall asleep and with a 3 wk old baby and a 4yo and 8yo ds it doesn't work out very well!!!!! I am on 10mg of lexapro, which I just uped to that last week from 5 mg, but not feeling too good from it yet.
Please tell me that I am not going to die from lack of sleep, please tell me that my life is not over, that I am still a good mom that I will get through this. I can't take sleeping pills/sedatives cause I have central sleep apnea, so I feel like there is no solution, I jsut feel trapped, so trapped that I dont' know which way to turn.
Any advice/stories? Any one else suffer from insomnia when have ppd?? I so need to know that I am not teh only one who has this, people always act so surprised that I can't sleep when baby sleeps, but I can't help it!
I didn't know you could take Lexapro while nursing? Can you?! If so you may have saved me. I'm having REALLY bad baby blues, and my husband just left for his hitch at work (he is gone for 14 days at a time so I'm essentially a single mom for half of the year). I don't mean to hijack, but I didn't know this!
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