Is there a place to talk about pre-natal depression - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 16 Old 10-17-2010, 05:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Pregnant and falling apart looking for support.

Christian SAHM & birth doula.
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#2 of 16 Old 10-17-2010, 06:05 PM
 
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Sorry you are dealing with this. I hope someone responds with helpful info.

I am very BLAH this pregnancy, feeling trapped, sick, sore and tired. I have nightmares all the freaking time.....

BUT I am not sure that it would be depression.

HUGS TO YOU
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#3 of 16 Old 10-17-2010, 06:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm just starting to feel like maybe that's what's going on with me. Restless sleep (for hours every night). Almost constant anxiety about the birth. No connection with the baby, not happy about being pregnant (and this is sooo the opposite of me, especially after two losses this year, you'd think I'd be thrilled about a viable pregnancy). The thought of having to feel the baby kick in a few weeks is freaking me out, because I just don't want to think about pregnancy. Crying randomly. And just that SAD feeling all the time. If it's not depression, it sure does suck big time.

Christian SAHM & birth doula.
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#4 of 16 Old 10-20-2010, 12:41 AM
 
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I'm not a doctor, but it sounds like you might be depressed. (I'm speaking from personal experience only.) Do you have a healthcare practitioner that you trust that you could talk to about it?

Tired mama to my wild childenergy.gif ribbluyel.gif

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#5 of 16 Old 10-20-2010, 01:50 AM
 
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I don't think I am depressed, but I have had a lot of anxiety, tears and fear during this pregnancy. I haven't really been very happy or excited, but that is just the way it is this time around. I am trying to be more positive, but it is hard for me. Being a vbac this pregnancy is hard. I hope you can find something that helps. Talking to my midwives, listening to hypnobabies affirmations, and talking a homeopathic remedy have helped me.

Maria, wife to DH, mama to DS 09/2007, #2 12/2010 and hoping for a
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#6 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 05:36 PM
 
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I go to a ppd group and the leader has said many times that it is a place for elective abortion ppd, misscarraige ppd, etc. Also she mentioned pre partum depression girls to attend the meetings too since she said there isnt alot out there for women going thru this. Im pretty sure I had it and though it would have freaked me out to attend a post partum group (as in, I might keep feeling like this? Even after the baby is born?) I think it would have prepared me for the fact that I am feeling like this after baby and now am searching for support. If it seems strange, I would contact the leader of a group in your area and get their opinion about attending. I has helped me immensly and wish I wouldve know before.

wife to dh the love of my life, and mommy to ds 3/10 . I get to spend everyday with my hero and my miracle.
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#7 of 16 Old 10-23-2010, 11:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks ladies. It does worry me that I'm going to perhaps get PPD because I'm having it pre-natally. I got my birth plans figured out, and that took some anxiety off me, and I felt happy for about a day. But all the sadness and disconnect from the pregnancy came back. I'm bummed because I'm normally over the moon when I'm pregnant...maybe I'll check out a PPD group. I feel the same way I did when I was depressed after my second m/c, I just lie in bed asking myself how I will make it through the next day, and have increased anxiety thinking about having to care for a third little. Uhhhg. I feel like such a bad mom right now. I'm not eating enough either which is so frustrating, I normally have the time of my life chowing down during pregnancy. I really can't pinpoint what's different about this one What's most awful is I keep thinking that if I miscarry again, I won't be that sad because I just want to run away from all of this. I know I would be devastated in reality, but I hate that I'm feeling like I wouldn't mind if it happened. I want to feel like I love this baby as much as the others and I just don't feel it.

Christian SAHM & birth doula.
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#8 of 16 Old 10-30-2010, 02:08 PM
 
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There's not a specific place for prenatal depression. It does get discussed here sometimes. Probably also in the mental health and in pregnancy forums.

In any case, it is pretty common, I think. I had it during my 3rd pregnancy and it was pretty rotten. I actually think I did better postpartum than early in pregnancy.

Here are a couple of threads that might be interesting to you.

Should I be ready for PPD
What about PRE-partum depression

My advice is that you do SOMETHING to treat it. There are lots of discussions in this forum about how to treat depression, both with medication and with more natural treatments. I hope you find something that works well for you.
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#9 of 16 Old 11-04-2010, 04:32 PM
 
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Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#10 of 16 Old 11-04-2010, 05:29 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovebeingamomma View Post
Pregnant and falling apart looking for support.
I'll support you! There is so, so, so very much information about postpartum depression-- even my *dad* asked me if I had suffered from it.

But depression during pregnancy can largely be ignored-- even by care providers.

My last pregnancy, around 28 weeks, I experienced the worst period of depression/anxiety that I have ever had. I literally could not function. My husband, who works from home, would come into our bedroom, find me still in bed, and have to help me get dressed to go to work. He even once had to come pick me up from work, when I was too distraught to be there.

Absolutely awful. I was so sure that I'd have PPD, that I printed off sheets of 'signs' and had DH keep them so he could refer to them.

I just wanted to reassure you that it is very real, and doesn't necessarily mean that you will have postpartum depression. I ended up having a high needs, colicky baby, via traumatic c-section, and trouble breastfeeding. I was shocked when I found myself on a 6 month postpartum high, that, looking back, only ended when I got pregnant again at 7 mos pp. I would (limping, with a screaming baby in hands), tell anyone that it was the best time in my life. And it really, truly was.

Texmati-- Knitter, Hindu, vegetarian, WOHM. Wife to superdadsuperhero.gif and mom to DS babyf.gif24 months, and DD boc.gif 8 months! .

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#11 of 16 Old 11-04-2010, 05:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I talked to my midwife today she said she approves using St. Johns Wort for treatment, experience with this? I'm going to wait til I see her in 4 weeks, but if things continue the way they have the benefits may outweigh any risks.

Christian SAHM & birth doula.
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#12 of 16 Old 11-04-2010, 05:41 PM
 
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I'm so sorry you are going through this. I was deeply depressed while I was pregnant and has PPD. I would strongly suggest getting some sort of help as soon as you can. Herbs, homeopathy, or even an SSRI that is considered "safe" for pregnancy- do whatever you have to do! I didn't take anti-depressants until post-partum, but I wish now that I had taken them during pregnancy. Being depressed made the transition of welcoming a beloved new child into our family a lot harder on everyone- especially our older daughter.

Good luck, you're in my thoughts and prayers.

Used to be stay at home parent to our two lovely girls, survived nursing school with family intact, about to graduate and looking for a job! I low-supply nursed my bio daughter for 3 years. 

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#13 of 16 Old 11-05-2010, 12:47 PM
 
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joining you all, I am having a difficult time and having a hard time thinking rationally and at first i thought it was all my dh, but now I am realizing that my normal rational mind is getting overwhelmed by emotions and i am taking everything personally. I feel like an outsider toward my extended family, which isn't that abnormal for me, but now so it seems worse. So I am reading that vitamin D, b complex and fish oil is good for this. I am already taking 2000ius of vitamin d, i have some b complex left from ttc and I guess i just need to find a fish oil supplement and try that, anyone know how much fish oil i should take?

I am also going to try to eat better, I know that i should be eating more veggies as well.

TIA

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#14 of 16 Old 01-12-2011, 10:01 PM
 
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I feel sad for you, reading your words, because I understand much about how you feel!  The depression I had during this last pregnancy was almost enough for me to think I don't want to have any more babies!  It was often a sad and horrible time.  I hope that by now you've found some solutions for your situation; I know that this is about 2 months since the last post!  Any updates?

 

I just want to say I am so sorry, and hugs to you! hug2.gif My experience was VERY similar.  My first pregnancy with DS was great, but then I struggled with PPD.  2nd pregnancy (just had baby, DD, 3 weeks ago; DS and DD are 16 months apart) was extremely difficult!!  Not physically - I had no complications.  But emotionally it was SOOooo hard!  It was also a home birth for me, first birth was in the hospital.  It was my home birth midwife who suggested that my depression during pregnancy, along with some other issues in my health record and history, might be due to low progesterone.  Low progesterone might be a possibility for your previous miscarriages, also. (Again, I am SO sorry that you've experienced those!)  It might be something to check into, if you are still struggling with these issues.  (just Google "low progesterone symptoms" for a list and details)

 

(If you're even still checking this thread:) If you're interested in talking more about any of it, let me know.  

 

If you're not still checking, I hope it's because you found answers and things are going wonderfully for you now!!

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#15 of 16 Old 01-17-2011, 01:31 PM
 
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I hope you'll see someone, a doctor, midwife, or therapist., and discuss this. I had pre-natal depression my first pregnancy. I did not quite realize it until after I had given birth, and put the pieces together. It was a very lonely and dark place, and I felt very, very guilty about feeling that way, and kept much of it to myself. The pregnancy was unplanned, and unwanted. I saw a therapist during this period and told her how I felt - her response was that whatever I felt toward the baby and pregnancy now, I would likely feel after giving birth. I was angry and upset to hear this from her, and stopped going to see her. In the end, she was unfortunately correct. I have postpartum depression now, and I regret not going in sooner, asking for help (though it seemed impossible to at the time, I could barely put my feelings into words, and thought I was going crazy), being put on a pregnancy approved anti depressant, or something, anything to get ahead of the PPD. I also told my midwife some about how I was feeling, her advice was not to think about it, that all would be well once the baby arrived, and also that thinking negative thoughts or having bad feelings would put the baby at risk (of what, I'm not sure - I was too young and naive to question her on this matter further). A load of crap the latter was! Having a severely depressed mother postpartum puts the baby at risk. Not speaking out and asking for help during the pregnancy! My best wishes and warm thoughts to you on your journey. 

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#16 of 16 Old 01-18-2011, 07:47 PM
 
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I had pretty awful pre-partum depression with my past pregnancy - also a pregnancy after a loss.  Miscarriages drive home the undiscussed fact that pregnant people don't always go on to have babies.  And once you have that in your head, as firmly as a loss or two will put it there, it's hard to connect to the pregnancy you have.  It's nearly impossible not to fear another loss.    Sometimes not thinking about it is the way we protect ourselves.

 

The way you feel now doesn't have to be the measure of the parent you will eventually be.  My depression persisted post-partum - I had a complicated pregnancy and a premature baby, I had severe blood loss, trauma and anxiety associated with the blood loss, and a c-section (which was actually the least alarming thing that happened to me that night).  For *months* loving my daughter was an act of will - I woke up every morning, and I did the things I thought that I would do if I loved her, all day, every day, because I believed I should do them.  It wasn't until I was able to catch up on sleep that I could let go of that effort and love her without working so hard.  Antidepressants helped me too.  They weren't a miracle, they didn't fix everything, but when I felt less anxious, I could sleep and I could cope, and those are not small gifts.

 

My opinion is that you shouldn't wait to start the St. John's Wort.  What good will come of four more weeks of suffering? If it doesn't help or if things get worse, you should seek out a therapist for more help. 

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