hi there,
i've been debating bringing up this part of the birth story, but i think it's important to bring it out because there are a number of women who suffered psychosis post partum who weren't as lucky as me.
it's pretty long and drawn out, so I'm going to piecemeal it.
some background: there are 3 levels of post partum depression, as it were. 1) baby blues, 2) post partum depression and 3) post partum psychosis. About 1 in 1000 women suffer post partum psychosis. it isn't a form of depression but rather a mental illness that can occur shortly after childbirth. I have never been psychotic before, but I was a the highest risk for ppd/psychosis, but I didn't know this until afterwards. I'll post the risks in this thread so you'll know, too.
it's important to know the clinical definition of psychosis when understanding what happened to me, this isn't a term I use loosely, and not a term I picked to self-describe my situation, it's something that I had to become familiar with along the way.
the miriam webster definition: Main Entry: psy·cho·sis
Pronunciation: sI-'kO-s&s
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural psy·cho·ses /-"sEz/
Etymology: New Latin
Date: 1847
: fundamental mental derangement (as schizophrenia) characterized by defective or lost contact with reality
lost contact with reality - what is reality? beats me, but I sure wasn't 'here' part of the time.
in my case I was so frazzled after Joe's birth, and while he was trapped in the NICU, I worked my self into a sleepless state where I became psychotic due to sleep deprivation. It didn't 'just happen', but I don't think it could have been prevented. And to tell the truth, I honor the experience and feel that it was ment to happen. In this thread I'm going to describe the clinical aspect of the psychotic break, but the spirutal aspect is something altogether different and I'll save that for another time.
In the week following Joe's birth, as I recovered from the birth itself, I became more sleep deprived as I worked to get my baby healthy and out of the hospital. About 7 days after he was born, I was brought to the emergency room and admitted to a psychiatric ward because I had lost touch with reality to a degree that I may have been a danger to myself or others. I was never suicidal or homicidal - but in that state, you aren't in control of your faculties. There was a large period of time where I just blacked out and have no idea what was going on. This was about the time that I was admitted to the hospital. I was in the psych ward for 8 days while I recovered from my 'break'. I didn't miss Joe while I was gone, at least, not at first, because I was so far gone, but the whole time I knew I was there for a reason and accepted that I needed to be there. My husband was very strong through this ordeal, and it was incredibly hard on him; i was incredibly hard on him. And my doctor saw me and him through it. I am even more comitted to naturopathy then ever before. I am not and will continue to avoid psychotropic drugs. I was on something for a short period of time. After this incident the allopathic head shrinks wanted me to be on drugs for the rest of my life, and I just couldn't live like that.
That's the major scoop, I'll fill you in on the details shortly.
blessings,
Lori
i've been debating bringing up this part of the birth story, but i think it's important to bring it out because there are a number of women who suffered psychosis post partum who weren't as lucky as me.
it's pretty long and drawn out, so I'm going to piecemeal it.
some background: there are 3 levels of post partum depression, as it were. 1) baby blues, 2) post partum depression and 3) post partum psychosis. About 1 in 1000 women suffer post partum psychosis. it isn't a form of depression but rather a mental illness that can occur shortly after childbirth. I have never been psychotic before, but I was a the highest risk for ppd/psychosis, but I didn't know this until afterwards. I'll post the risks in this thread so you'll know, too.
it's important to know the clinical definition of psychosis when understanding what happened to me, this isn't a term I use loosely, and not a term I picked to self-describe my situation, it's something that I had to become familiar with along the way.
the miriam webster definition: Main Entry: psy·cho·sis
Pronunciation: sI-'kO-s&s
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural psy·cho·ses /-"sEz/
Etymology: New Latin
Date: 1847
: fundamental mental derangement (as schizophrenia) characterized by defective or lost contact with reality
lost contact with reality - what is reality? beats me, but I sure wasn't 'here' part of the time.
in my case I was so frazzled after Joe's birth, and while he was trapped in the NICU, I worked my self into a sleepless state where I became psychotic due to sleep deprivation. It didn't 'just happen', but I don't think it could have been prevented. And to tell the truth, I honor the experience and feel that it was ment to happen. In this thread I'm going to describe the clinical aspect of the psychotic break, but the spirutal aspect is something altogether different and I'll save that for another time.
In the week following Joe's birth, as I recovered from the birth itself, I became more sleep deprived as I worked to get my baby healthy and out of the hospital. About 7 days after he was born, I was brought to the emergency room and admitted to a psychiatric ward because I had lost touch with reality to a degree that I may have been a danger to myself or others. I was never suicidal or homicidal - but in that state, you aren't in control of your faculties. There was a large period of time where I just blacked out and have no idea what was going on. This was about the time that I was admitted to the hospital. I was in the psych ward for 8 days while I recovered from my 'break'. I didn't miss Joe while I was gone, at least, not at first, because I was so far gone, but the whole time I knew I was there for a reason and accepted that I needed to be there. My husband was very strong through this ordeal, and it was incredibly hard on him; i was incredibly hard on him. And my doctor saw me and him through it. I am even more comitted to naturopathy then ever before. I am not and will continue to avoid psychotropic drugs. I was on something for a short period of time. After this incident the allopathic head shrinks wanted me to be on drugs for the rest of my life, and I just couldn't live like that.
That's the major scoop, I'll fill you in on the details shortly.
blessings,
Lori