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#1 of 15 Old 10-15-2007, 10:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm feeling like no one can help me. Every therapist I've spoken has minimized what I'm going through, and no one is taking me seriously. One lady said "Its not that i dont believe ppd exists, but I believe when you take care of the life stressors that are going on, you see a major change."

Right now Dp and I are both unemployed, and both looking for part time jobs. We have about $20 to live off of right now (thank god we have food stamps) and cant even afford gas. I've already spent a lot of money looking for therapists. Dp is resentful that i basically used the last of our money. There are only 3 psychiatrists out here and it is $150 to see them. They dont do sliding scales, and our medicaid will not cover it. I already owe a bunch of people money have no one left to borrow from.

PSI has ZERO referrals for my area. What the heck am i supposed to do now? no one believes me that i really need help.

Creating Art. Living life on Guam. Sharing my Journey.

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#2 of 15 Old 10-15-2007, 11:20 PM
 
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oh gosh, mama. i don't have any ideas but couldn't read and not give you a hug . i am so sorry you are having so much trouble. do you think meds would help? i think you can usually get those from a regular family practice doctor, instead of having to see a psychiatrist.

Chrissy, lucky mama to Noah (9), Lilah (6), Rowan (3) and Laney (1).
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#3 of 15 Old 10-15-2007, 11:56 PM
 
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reading online helped me a LOT. I have yet to see a therapist... as I am still seeking one that deals with ppocd. But, I have found tons of reassuring and helpful info online just from googling and reading through the threads here. There are also lots of books you could order that are all about ppd and working through it.
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#4 of 15 Old 10-16-2007, 12:00 AM
 
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I am so sorry ... you could try some St Johns Wort and Fish Oil supplements... It is really working for me. It costs money of course but less than a psych appt...at least it might get you in the right direction ... my mw recommended it and I was totally doubtful and didnt take it till I went to a LLL conference and went to the PPD seminar....she talked a lot about omega-3 fish oil...

good luck
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#5 of 15 Old 10-16-2007, 04:06 PM
 
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I'm sorry for what you're going through. I'd try catholic charities or st vincent de paul. You do not have to be catholic to get help through these groups. catholic charities would likely have counselors who take a sliding scale.
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#6 of 15 Old 10-16-2007, 05:03 PM
 
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I second the recommendation for meds vs. therapy. It's much less expensive. And of course you're stressed about not having a job, as if you could just snap your fingers and make it better! : Zoloft has made me feel normal again. I don't think therapy would help me; I know what my "issues" are from my life, talking about them doesn't make them go away! Just my opinion though. Maybe save the therapy for when you guys are back on your feet, you know? It is so expensive!
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#7 of 15 Old 10-16-2007, 06:48 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shell024 View Post
"I believe when you take care of the life stressors that are going on, you see a major change."
Wow, that's a little insensitive. Part of what I find the most difficult about my PPD is that I CANNOT seem to START to change anything. I am frozen. Someone knowledgeable about PPD would be aware of this.
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#8 of 15 Old 10-17-2007, 11:28 PM
 
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Oh, I 2nd the omega 3. In a book called something like Healing Depression Naturally, there is a chapter on omega 3 to help depression and bipolar disorder. I took large doses of omega 3 with high EPA ( maybe starting at 2 or 3 grams and moving up every week or so). It really pulled me out of my depressive fog, that is until it gave me a lot of anxiety and made me a raving bitch. I had to come down to low doses. Then I tried SAM-e, but that didn't seem to work. Exercise always helps.
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#9 of 15 Old 10-18-2007, 12:28 AM
 
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Shell, I feel for you, I really do. It's a tough thing to go through. After I had my son it was so hard to get up, do anything, and even take care of him. I loved him, but wanted to give him back(I feel horrible for saying it). You want/need someone to talk to and then when they are sitting there you feel bad for they way you are feeling and then they turn around and tell you to snap out of it! The pantry was bare and there was nothing I could do. I went the med route and that got a bit expensive in the end.

Lexapro, Zoloft, blach. I HATED the way they made me feel. I was not depressed anymore, but I didn't feel like myself, plus I could not breastfeed and that made me feel even worse.

I 100% agree with omega 3. It has made a WORLD of difference for me. I feel great and feel like myself. I started out with mega doses and then gradually lowered the dosage.

I do know it seems hopeless and there is no end in sight, but you will pull through it. If I did I know anyone can

wife to DH 2/03, mama to DS 3/03 & DD 1/09
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#10 of 15 Old 10-18-2007, 02:18 AM
 
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Please don't give up.

I honestly don't think counseling is very helpful for depression by itself. If I could only afford one type of treatment, I would go with medical, not counseling.

If I could not afford medical, I would go the DIY route. Possibly with B vitamins, zinc, omega-3's, and amino acids.

I have to confess - what I had recently was not PPD - our DS just turned two. But, in the last two months, I have had remarkable success treating my own depression with B vitamins and taurine. I mean really turned it around.

I don't know what the guidelines on B vitamins and taurine are for nursing a newborn. And the source of mine might not be something newborn-nursing mom would want...basically I've been drinking Red Bull once a day ! : And the caffeine might be undesirable. But, I think the B vitamins and taurine have been effective enough that if I didn't want the caffeine, I would take those as supplements.

This is not that far off from the approach of the psychiatrist my DH went to...he put him on B vitamins, zinc, manganese, and several amino acids.

Anyway, I have been treated by psychiatrists for depression before, with Prozac, and I have to say, I think the Red Bull has helped me more and more quickly than the Rx stuff ever did. It certainly costs less.

Quote:
Originally Posted by shell024 View Post
I'm feeling like no one can help me.

DS1 March 2003DS2 Sept 2005,
and 3 , in our happy secular
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#11 of 15 Old 10-18-2007, 03:32 AM
 
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See if you can find a NeuroLinguistic Programming practitioner in your area. Many will work on a sliding scale. NLP reframes our thinking and beliefs, which can affect brain chemistry in a huge way. I have been enormously helped by reading (and reading and reading) Happiness is a Choice by Barry Neil Kaufman. Don't let the title fool you it's not a blame the sufferer kind of book at all. It teaches a whole new way of looking at things, which again, can balance our brain chemistry.
It does suck to be broke, but it says absolutely nothing about your worth as a human being. From a Buddhist perspective, what you are experiencing now is the muck which is the only place from which the lotus can blossom. I experience depression fairly often, and in the worst of it I do feel totally stuck. I have learned to just suck it up sometimes and take some action, because I KNOW it's the only way to get unstuck. But it's taken a lot of practice to get where I feel like I have a choice...:
hang in there, mama.
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#12 of 15 Old 11-01-2007, 03:09 PM
 
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Hang in there! I don't have any ideas on how to get the medical you need, sorry. But, what social support do you have? LLL? Mom's group? It won't fix the money issue, or get you meds, but with all the stresses in your life, you need emotional support! Keep in touch with support on the internet too-you'll get through this!!
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#13 of 15 Old 11-01-2007, 09:52 PM
 
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I'm sorry you are feeling this way, not sure about meds, therapists etc. I had ppd for about a year and have had depression most my life. I've never taken meds or seen a therapist, couldn't afford the latter and didn't want the former tho they do help some people. When life is just an unhappy experience I think we can percieve our problems as being way bigger than they really are and the endless bad feelings just keep it all going,no end in sight.I know severe problems so I'm not undermining how you are feeling, blieve me, no way, just things get out of context in our minds.I just found the endless stressing never helped. I've been rock bottom and things don't SEEM so bad now, I practised some kind of talking to myself through a lot of anxiety, essential to calming down, realised I couldn't fix everything, had to just get on but not in such a miserable state. Talking to myself really helped, comforting myself, not easy I found, cos I know I don't like myself, feel I'm not worth liking etc,hate myself for past mistakes,telling myself yes you can answer the phone, go into the shop, deal with stuff without losing it on some sort of mental level, it's like scared about whats going to happen if I can't handle/contain these feelings anymore, in the end I was like 'bring it on, I don't care anymore' and the fear can be controlled a bit. Don't know your age but my depression started to ease a lot at age 35 or so, I also got rid of all the crappy people in my life too and faced my substance abuse issues, thinking back it got harder than ever before facing it all. Environmental factors are a biggie imo.I have addiction issues I guess, tobacco, sugar and dope, at least its not alcohol etc anymore, I feel like my fears are always there, lurking and I don't even know what I fear any more cos I've been through the shit now and have to live with it all. Recently tho I feel persecuted again and checking under beds etc, always looking over my shoulder even tho I've been on my own for years now. That'll be the years of domestic violence probly. I get sad thinking how mucked up my life has been and how it could have been happier. I strive to make my dc's lives full of good stuff and love tho and it's exhausting but way worth it.You can be happier tho you may not feel you can be,it is so possible however you decide to get throught this. I would try healing through diet, fish oils, herbs,swimming whatever suits you, try just being, sitting, meditating, not worrying, not stressing, yep it's hard but you need to be good to yourself and care for yourself. I think I faced my demons.You could investigate meds, I seriously did not give them a thought except 'no way they aren't getting me on that stuff' BUT some people have had results, maybe get a break from the depression,get back on your feet. I don't think they will treat the root cause but I know nothing. You need to build your self-esteem and make those moments where you feel a bit more content last, I find every day a huge struggle mentally but nothing like 20 yr ago when I cried all day and was clinical I think. Now I just feel empty but strive to rid myself of useless 'needs' like getting wasted (to feel happier)and be positive around my dc. I'm skint till Monday now, same crap every week but we got food, some heat, a roof and lots of love and books, I used to do food skips and saved a packet, I used to live in a 2-person tent with my babies to escape violence, done a fair bit of homeless.I hope you get through the week ok and get some food and feel bit better, maybe make plans to see a doc or something you feel suitable,check out groups for depression and get involved, maybe talk with others in the same boat, don't close yourself off if that is not helpful, reckon therapists can be a ridiculous rip-off financially and maybe otherwise.
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#14 of 15 Old 11-01-2007, 09:54 PM
 
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I'm so sorry that you're having trouble getting the help that you need.

Ruth, single mommy to Leah, 19, Hannah, 18 (commuting to college), and Jack, 13(homeschooled)
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#15 of 15 Old 11-27-2007, 04:12 AM
 
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Oh Shell, my heart is breaking just reading this . How could I have missed this. I'm such a terrible friend. I knew you were having a hard time but I didn't know you hurting this much. You're such a strong woman I thought you were just having bouts of PPD I wish you would've just come out and said "hey I'm craking over here" but it's hard for us "super moms". I know I was going through some mild PPD which I believe went away with B6 and 5HTP but I should've said the heck with every thing else and just held on tight to you. I'm sorry, I had my blinders on and was only looking straight ahead. I'm always here for you, TRULLY! Just scream I'm sure hear you then and sure it'll feel a lot better too. For now know that I love you, you're amazing! Miss you girl
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