Punctuation question (poetry) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 04-17-2007, 07:40 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'd love some help with punctuation. This isn't the real line, but it's the same structure. Please help


I sing high, then, I sing low.


Do I need both commas (before and after "then")?
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#2 of 7 Old 04-17-2007, 07:47 PM
 
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I have to say, but, I don't know.

Although, under different circumstances, I probably would have said:

I have to say, but I don't know.

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#3 of 7 Old 04-17-2007, 07:49 PM
 
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It seems to make a difference to the meaning--albeit a subtle one. : But that said, I'd go with:

I sing high, then I sing low

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#4 of 7 Old 04-17-2007, 07:49 PM
 
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Maybe it should be:

I sing high. Then, I sing low.

I suck at punctuation beyond the most basic, though.

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#5 of 7 Old 04-17-2007, 07:52 PM
 
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Professional copyeditor checking in.

Quote:
Originally Posted by claras_mom View Post
It seems to make a difference to the meaning--albeit a subtle one. : But that said, I'd go with:

I sing high, then I sing low

This.

Equally acceptable would be:

I sing high and then I sing low.

Or:

I sing high, then low.
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#6 of 7 Old 04-17-2007, 08:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank You!!!!
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#7 of 7 Old 04-21-2007, 11:04 PM
 
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I say no commas too, however, it depends on the music or rhythm you are trying to achieve . . .

You could also create the pauses with a line break.

I sing high then
I sing low

or

I sing high
then I sing low

etc.
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