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#1 of 6 Old 05-08-2008, 08:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am so sorry I have not posted one in a while, I have Burt'sGirl to thank for this one

What is the biggest misconception people have about you?

That should be fun, post here if you would like.

                                Whatever will be, already is...
 
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#2 of 6 Old 05-13-2008, 11:31 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Anyone doing this????

I have been so busy but am going to be working on it. I'd love to see the things you guys come up with


WARNING, OT:
(btw, my daughter just won the spelling bee and I am beside myself with excitement. She is a great writer and reader!!)

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#3 of 6 Old 05-13-2008, 11:38 AM
 
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That I am happy.... No time to elaborate, but that is definitely the answer here.
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#4 of 6 Old 05-13-2008, 12:29 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kirsten View Post
That I am happy.... No time to elaborate, but that is definitely the answer here.

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#5 of 6 Old 05-13-2008, 10:45 PM
 
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The biggest misconception people have about me is that I am overworked and over stressed just because I am the mother of four children. Honestly, I feel no more frazzled now than I did with only one child! Yes, there's more laundry now, but back then, I had to go to the laundry mat (ugh!). Now, I have a laundry room directly beside my kitchen, so it's easy to pop in, rotate laundry, fold clothes and keep an eye on kids & dinner at the same time! Speaking of folding laundry, as my kids have aged, this has become immensely easier - instead of washing, drying, folding and putting away by myself, I now have a small laundry basket for each of the 3 oldest boys. As I fold, I plop their items into their baskets and *they* get to put their clothes away! I simply never, ever look in their dressers because when I've accidentally done so, I could cry at what happens to all of my hard work. Oh, and I also stopped folding their socks. I bought socks with colored bottoms and now toss all blue to one boy, black to another and white to the third - easy peasy!

In addition, when I had my first son, my husband was a total slacker - much like having a second child in terms of creating messes but never cleaning up after himself. I left him and life was so much easier! Then I had my second son (his sperm donor was in and out of our lives just long enough to leave me my second blessing), so I was again a single mom. That was glorious! I was the end-all, be-all in my own home. If it was a wreck, that was on me. If it was sparkling from top to bottom, that was also on me. And if I said, "No, you may not have candy," there was no higher court of appeal (aka, dad). My favorite expression from those days was that I never had to pretend to care what the other parent thought - I could simply raise my children my way and not have to appease anyone else. Then I remarried. Co-parenting is extremely challenging. Lucky me, I married a man who cooks, cleans, helps with laundry, PLUS maintains the vehicles, takes out the trash, etc. We really run the household together. It's not easy to co-parent, but it sure is nice having a second pair of hands that actually help!

Anyway, when people hear I have 4 kids, they often don't realize that my oldest is almost 14, so I no longer have to wipe his butt. My second two boys are 8 - old enough to water the dog, clean the litter box, take out the trash and, when in trouble, scrub the floors on their hands & knees. The hardest part of having 4 kids is that the youngest is only 23 months old. But he's a baby, so every mess is easy to excuse, every mini-tantrum expected and normal. In a sense, it's more like having one child and three mother's helpers. So, honestly, I think being the mother of 4 is easier than it was with one. Or even two.


Wife to one amazing man, unschooly mama to 2 boys daily (8/99 and 6/06), mom to 4 boys (6/94 and 2/00) and countless exchange students, praying to someday homebirth a daughter...
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#6 of 6 Old 05-21-2008, 01:06 AM
 
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I've been meaning to participate in the prompts, but with work, a 5 year old and a 9 month old ... I guess I just haven't scratched out any time for it ... Here goes:

What I wouldn't give to know the answer to this! I don't even know how to begin to conceive of what people think of me. Who does know, really, how they are perceived by others?

Rolling my eyes at myself, I'm always reminded of a goofy pop psychology bar quiz that a friend of mine administered to me years ago. Something to the effect of "if you were to be reincarnated, what animal would you come back as. If you couldn't be that animal, what would you pick next. And what would your third pick be." Then you go on to explain the traits of that animal that led you to choose it.

The idea was that the characteristics first animal is who you would ideally like to be, the second is how people perceive you and the last is who you really are.

I think my second was a black panther. My third was a shark. The reasons for them? The panther is strong, sleek, stealthy, powerful, solitary and sexy. the shark is virtually unchanged since prehistory, powerful, fierce, strong, fearsome, and yet, incredibly vulnerable. A shark can be killed by a dolphin slamming into it. But despite this vulnerability, it has remained unchanged for millions of years.

So if one is how people perceive me, and the other is who I am, than the biggest misconception people have of me is that I have strength without vulnerability. Oddly enough, for bar psychology, it's not so far from the truth that you can't see it from there.

Once I tried to talk to a good friend during a vulnerable, difficult time. He did not know what to do. It freaked him out! We had to turn the conversation back to his dramas, because he couldn't deal with me showing any difficulty handling things in my life.

I guess in his mind, I was the panther. But, if you believe pop personality tests, I'm just a big sack of cartilage wrapped in tough skin with a jawful of sharp teeth, one dolphin slam away from annihilation.
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