So sad...Please Respond. - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 05-11-2009, 10:14 PM - Thread Starter
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My ds turns 3 in August...

Since birth he has always been an avid nurser and has only recently (after turning two) had more sporadic nursing sessions...sometimes down to once or twice a day if we were somewhere busy or distracting (despite my offering). This decline was interspersed with his normal patterns of 10+ times a day and throughout the night...

and then I got pregnant.

At first I was nipples were so sore, and suddenly, the poking, prodding and twiddling that he has always done was driving me CRAZY. I didn't limit his nursing, although I did ask him occasionally to wait a bit...
I also started talking to him about how the picking and poking didn't feel good and I would prefer that he rubbed a blanket, played with my hair, rubbed the fabric on my shirt...etc...

I have felt very strongly about CLW...tonight, ds told me he was sleepy and so he laid in my lap as always and started to nurse...only he didn't actually latch right and was sucking as if through a straw. I asked him to unlatch, open wide and try again...but the same thing happened...only this time he stopped...and started poking, prodding and twiddling with my nipple laying in his closed mouth. This REALLY bugged me...I explained that I didn't like that and asked him to suck...we switched sides...same scenario. I finally asked if there was any milk and he said "No...they are empty".

We tried again 3 more times with the same result...I am SO sad. This was one of my biggest fears with being pregnant...he finally jumped down and went to lay in bed with daddy. I am 12 weeks...and unable to stop crying. I am totally okay with ds weaning...I just wanted to be his choice...without outside influence. I have encouraged him to continue nursing and planned to tandem...Now it seems that he is just...done.

He's never even fallen asleep without nursing. Has anyone else been through this? Could it just be a fluke? Is there anything I can to encourage him? Any response would be appreciated...

Carolina, tree hugging, treehugger.gif animal loving, backyard chicken keeping, Wife to Dh, homeschooling Mama to Ds1(Aug '06) and Ds2 (Nov '09)

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#2 of 10 Old 05-11-2009, 10:34 PM - Thread Starter
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um...false alarm?!

He just nursed to sleep. Gosh...these hormones are making me loopy...

Carolina, tree hugging, treehugger.gif animal loving, backyard chicken keeping, Wife to Dh, homeschooling Mama to Ds1(Aug '06) and Ds2 (Nov '09)

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#3 of 10 Old 05-11-2009, 11:46 PM
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sometimes dd says "not workin. other side." and then "not workin. other side." "mommy nursies not workin." And so I say with a sigh.."are you almost done with nursies, la?" and she will say, "tomorrow". And tomorrow they apparently work. But momma I am READY for them to be "not workin"
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#4 of 10 Old 05-11-2009, 11:59 PM
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I don't know if this helps but I have nursed through 2 pgs, my milk dried up and they even nursed less, then when I had the babies they started nursing more and currently my 3 1/2 yr old wants to nurse more than my 8 mo old.

Hang in there mama!

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#5 of 10 Old 05-12-2009, 03:09 PM
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#6 of 10 Old 05-12-2009, 03:13 PM
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to you, mama. I'm glad he ended up nursing after all! I get a little choked up reading stuff like this as we talk about TTC #2 with a very nursey 16mo. I think my heart would break into a million pieces if he had to stop nursing b/c I got pregnant!

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#7 of 10 Old 05-12-2009, 03:14 PM
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If I remember correctly this happened to my mom and the older kids always relatched when the baby was born.

Mama to expecting Babe 2
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#8 of 10 Old 05-12-2009, 03:15 PM
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I get it, totally. DD was 18 months when i got pregnant. By 23 months old, she was done. I was 18 weeks pregnant the last time she nursed. It was very sad. i wanted her to be the one to choose when she would be done, but it was just too much for me. For the last 8 weeks or so I had constant fantasies of chucking her across the room while she was nursing. It was not a good thing, for either of us. i wanted to remember her nursing as a good, happy thing. Not the annoying creepy crawlie feelings I had.

I did ask if she wanted to nurse again a month later and it was like she had forgotten how. Once the baby was born she did ask, but even when i said that she could try, she just giggled and walked away. Sigh......

W (26) and C (27) parenting G (11/06 ) and D (2/09 ) plus a new one (3/11)
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#9 of 10 Old 05-14-2009, 11:09 AM
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Just quickly sharing my story. My DS was an avid nurser as well. When I got pregnant with DD there were a few times early on that he couldn't get any milk so we'd stop and rock and read a book. Also, when there was milk, sometimes he'd stop nursing to tell me "so different mommy" -- my milk tasted different. For us, it ended up not being a problem. We kept nursing through the entire pregnancy and we've been tandem nursing for 7 months now. DS increased the frequency of nursing just after his sister was born and has leveled off again.

Glad to hear you nursed him to sleep, a good sign. The tenderness and sensitivity should go away soon, fingers crossed. Best of luck to you!
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#10 of 10 Old 05-14-2009, 11:35 AM
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This happened to me too, although DD1 was only about 14 months when I got pregnant again. Off and on during my pregnancy, she would lose interest and slow down nursing, ramp up again, lose interest again. Her latch would get lazy. But she kept going all the way through and shortly after DD2 was born, she announced "Your new milk is YUMMY!!" It made me feel really good when she said that, making it all worth it. Hope that happens to you and your DS!

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