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#1 of 32 Old 09-23-2010, 01:50 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Anyone here planning to UC twins or have already done it? I have loved reading all of the twin UC birth stories in the archives. I'm currently 35 wks and we are planning our 2nd UC.

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#2 of 32 Old 09-23-2010, 12:33 PM
 
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I haven't but just wanted to come here and say congrats on making it to 35 weeks with twins!!
You're about 36 weeks though right? Or even almost 37? I'm due at the end of the month and I'm 35 weeks tomorrow (Friday). Either way, that's really great that they stayed in the womb until now!!

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03/02: 11/05: 01/08: 10-18-09: 10-31-10 and 7/22/13 with twins and just found out we're pos.gif again!!chicken3.gif

 

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#3 of 32 Old 09-23-2010, 01:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm actually 35 weeks today too!! I'm due the day before you are on 10/28/10. I just put 10/10 for Oct of '10 not knowing when in the month they'd come. I went all 40wks with our 1st set of twins so was expecting very much to do it this time around also. I'm fighting off some serious contractions though so it's looking unlikely that I will make it all 40 this time. New goal is 37 but hoping for 38 wks. I'll laugh when I blow past it and carry these two to 40 wks as well. LOL! I topped out at only 42 cm in fundal height with our 1st set despite the fact they came out weighing 6'4 and 7'2 but am now already measuring at 43 cm with still 5 wks left to go with these 2. So, we'll see if I actually make it to the 40 wk milestone again. I'm good with 38 wks.....or Oct 10th which would be 37.5 wks. I think it'd be pretty fun to have babies 9&10 on 10/10/10. I also thought that about #7 and a birth date of 7/7/07...but he came on the 12th! Go figure.

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#4 of 32 Old 09-23-2010, 02:37 PM
 
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Oh! I get it now. Sorry. I assumed the year was left off. Lol. That's awesome you went to 40 weeks with your previous set of twins! My baby is measuring just shy of 2 weeks ahead according to a growth scan ultrasound last week. I had just turned 34 weeks last Friday and baby was measuring 35 wks 5 days. DH and I aren't sure I'll make it till the 29th either. Hopefully your kiddos will stay put a few more weeks. What would be awesome is if the first baby born was born on the 9th and then a few minutes later the second baby was born on the 10th! Lol. We're talking 11:58pm and then 12:02am! But then you'd have to explain how your twins have different birth days. Lol. Do you have a midwife or are you doing prenatal care on your own? I'm asking to find out if you know what gender you are having yet?

Married to a Navy man of 12 yrs.

03/02: 11/05: 01/08: 10-18-09: 10-31-10 and 7/22/13 with twins and just found out we're pos.gif again!!chicken3.gif

 

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#5 of 32 Old 09-23-2010, 04:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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The mw part is kind of a long story. My husband is a firefighter/paramedic and despite the fact I apprenticed as a midwife for 7 yrs before our marriage and attended 150 births he would not ever consent to a homebirth. So, our 1st 3 and 1st set of twins were hospital births. It took a true miracle to find a dr that would deliver our 1st set naturally, as B was breech. Original Dr terminated my care at 38 wks telling us he'd see us in court on 2 counts of child endangerment since I refused to consent to a c/s. I went without a dr from 38-39 wks and then was referred by a midwife to her backup OB. I met him the day I turned 39 wks and he delivered them naturally at 40 wks with B still breech. The whole experience opened dh's eyes to the medical profession and how limited their thinking is and he was very tired of fighting them as strongly as we had that whole pregnancy. So, with #6 he finally agreed to a midwife and a birthing home/center. It was ok but still not a homebirth. With #7 we were now living 4 hrs away from the mw and her center but we are so rural the only close mw that did exist was still a 2hr drive and I did not connect or bond with her at all. In fact, I couldn't really stand her. So, we chose to use our old mw but all I really wanted at that point was to UP/UC. And I think the entire pregnancy I had just always invisoned UCing. So, my water broke and with contractions immediately 2-3 minutes apart we willingly chose to stay home instead of traveling the 4 hrs to get there. He was born 3 hrs later at home, with just dh and I there. It was by far one of the most life changing experiences either of us have ever had. But even after that dh refused to actually plan a UC and definitely would not UP. So, we again sought prenatal care with the mw and traveled the 4 hrs to have baby there. It was miserable...the whole experience and birth....really kind of both miserable and traumatic. After that we planned on UPing and UCing our next baby but after a loss at 14 wks I really just wanted the assurance of a mw, her doppler and access to a u/s. We finally had one locally that was just recently licensed this past June. I really fell in love with her but my heart was still just to UC. But, we went ahead and pursued the pregnancy with her as our caregiver. She was a hands off mw that I really wanted but when the 21 wk u/s revealed twins it also revealed the fact she had never even attended a twin pregnancy or birth in all of her yrs of apprenticeship and as a student. We joked that I have attended more births than she had. I've attended around 150..no clue how many she's attended, but it was our ongoing joke. Dh and I were both fine with that. We all felt comfortable with keeping her and continuing care. But the more time that passed and the more time she had to educate herself on twins and read textbooks the more hands on she became. I hesitate to use the word fearful since it didn't really seem like a true fear...but the inexperience really was brought to light. We went from just she attending the birth to her mandating 3 other midwives be present as well and then she took on a student. That upped the total number of people to 5...which I really really didn't want. I agreed to be amiable and not wishing to be a tough client but the more time that passed the more uncomfortable I became and the more my true desires for a UC really came up. Her financial fees were also sky high as I learned she was charging us 200.00 p/ appt. So, that also played a deciding factor in the deal. We went from the original price of 3,300 to ending at around 4,100. There was a very unexpected extra 500.00 twin cost once they were discovered, plus a 200.00 birth pool rental fee (it only cost us 184 to buy it), travel fee since we were over 30 miles out and so forth. 3 of the other mw's were traveling distances of 2 and 3 hrs and it went from having agreed early on that I don't want to be checked for dilation at all and just allowed to "go with it" to her stating she would be checking me for progress now that twins were in the picture. Monitoring babies became huge, possibly holding the 2nd twin in place by fundal pressure until his delivery since they are both vertex right now and so on. There was also mention of ways we could slow my labor, like delaying getting into the pool and stuff, if it progressed too swiftly so the other mw's had time to arrive. That is not my idea of fun. I got really overwhelmed really quickly. And my desire for a hands off birth was quickly flying out the window....especially involving all the people that were now to be present. I voiced my dislilke and concern over this many times but in a very kind loving way she was pushy and said they had to stay. Out of the 4 certified mw's that were to be in attendance only 1, whom I would never meet until the birth had any twin experience. And suddenly it all kind of seemed like a party/spectacle. After much debate and some deep soul searching, long talks into the night, dh and I finally agreed to go with the UC that we both had begun this whole pregnancy journey desiring. It was an amazing miracle for him to agree to this...especially now knowing there are 2 in there. I refuse to UC if we are not in total agreement...as I think it is imperative to both be on the same page about it all.

So, just this last week I terminated my care with her and we are greatly anticipating our 2nd UC. I am so at peace and soooo excited! Suddenly it just all feels better and the world is alright. I think maybe if this was my 1st set of twins I might feel differently but after having experienced some of the births we have it just feels so peaceful to finally be at this place....and there is no stress. There are certainly things to consider and i have loved reading through many of the threads on here... like worrying more the 2nd time you UC. Because I do. I think the first time we just went with it, did it and flew by the seat of our pants. It was much different than actually planning it for months...or weeks. This time there is time to think it through and gather what we need. With our 1st UC dh just brought home an emergency OB kit from the station for the "just in case" and we used that. It had cord clamps and stuff. THis time having had so many previous pregnancies and also being a twin pregnancy I've thought alot about hemorrahaging and the possibility that may exist. But instead of becoming fearful about it we have just chosen to use that knowledge to prepare and have on hand what is needed...armed with all of the info we can get. Another thing that helped us decide to break it off with our mw is knowing there is nothing she can do that we can't do. Many of the things she said mandated transfer or positions that were "undeliverable" I would definitely do at home. The only thing she really had going for her by the end of it was the fact she carried pitocin. But after much much research I feel confident that there are other ways to treat it that we can do ourselves with the same great outcomes. And things such as cord prolapse of 2nd twin or other factors she would just transfer anyway...which is what we would do.

So, I am very at peace and very excited with our decision. It's an amazing place to be after feeling a bit trapped by it all....and it's returning to our intitial heart's desire. Soooo....we did have a mw but now we don't. I had a gender/"make me feel better" u/s at 21 wks, which shocked everybody by revealing 2 in there yet again, both breech at that early point, and then another at 33 wks to check positions and growth of babies. We were pretty sure they had flipped to vertex at about 26 wks. The 2nd u/s showed they both indeed had and have continued to stay that way every since. I'm thinking they'll probably stay put given how long they've been in those positions. With our 1st set A stayed vertex the entire pregnancy while B flipped round and round up until the day he was delivered breech.

And both 21 and 33 wk u/s revealed yet another set of twin boys. LOL! So, once they arrive we'll have 7 boys and 3 girls. We have 12b, 10g, 7g, 5b, 5b, 4b, 3b, almost 2g and then these 2 boys. Lots of snakes, gekkos and wrestling going on around here. LOL!

And I'd never thought about an Oct 9th and Oct 10th baby. That'd be cooler than the 10th!! LOL!

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#6 of 32 Old 09-23-2010, 11:29 PM
 
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Wow! After reading that I don't blame you at all for terminating the midwife care. Sounds more intervention than hands off. I'm glad that you both are in agreement to UC. I still haven't heard what DH is thinking. I REALLY want to UC. I don't want to go to the hospital again and I don't want to go to the birthing center either. They don't delay cord clamping. At all. But I do like that I can leave 4 hours after birthing as long as I'm doing okay and baby is okay. No way can I get out that fast at the hospital. But if I'm home, I don't have to worry about going anywhere. I can bond with baby and not have to pack up and go home. I'm already there. Keep us updated on how you are doing! Are you having any birhting pressures or braxton hicks?

Married to a Navy man of 12 yrs.

03/02: 11/05: 01/08: 10-18-09: 10-31-10 and 7/22/13 with twins and just found out we're pos.gif again!!chicken3.gif

 

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#7 of 32 Old 09-24-2010, 09:10 PM
 
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that sounds so wonderful!!! i can't wait to read your birth story! it's funny how it's such a natural progression... with my first and second i had hospital births with ob's, with my third, hospital midwife birth in a progressive hospital. if i would ever get pg again (thought i was this month, but i'm not), i want to do a homebirth with a midwife, although i feel totally confident if the midwife doesn't show up.

i was wondering something. i'm so impressed by big families, i feel that you are so blessed... and was wondering when you got your cycles back after your births. i see your kids are so close in age; i didn't get my cycles back until between 15-18 mo postpartum, with extended nursing. i'm so amazed over women who nurse and still get pg before their nursling is 1 yo. (i'm sorry if you do not nurse or extended nurse and i'm assuming that you do.) so i was wondering how long you nurse and how often, to get pg so fast.

truly i do not mean anything bad about this, i'm just so curious about women getting pg so fast. i had a bit of a hard time getting pg with #1. #2 and #3 were faster/easier after getting ppaf back, which took over a year.

good luck honey... you're amazing!!!

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#8 of 32 Old 09-24-2010, 11:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We get asked all kinds of questions and your's is not offensive at all!! Trust me..there's some people out there that ask some truly mind boggling questions of larger families. LOL! I do exclusievly nurse all of them. We began our marriage with 3children in mind. I wanted 4, he wanted 2 so we settled on 3. It made sense since we are both from families with 3 children. So, I was on the pill all of that time which spaced our 1st 3 out by 2 1/2 yrs. After 3 we were done but dh's dept went through downsizing and he was laid off..so, we had no insurance coverage to cover a vasectomy. He had his dr picked out and everything and we were just waiting on the backup insurance to be verified when we learned I was pregnant again with, what we thought was, #4. With him out of a job we were stressed so it really bumped up his desire to have the v done. At 12 wks I began to bleed heavily so we assumed I was miscarrying. At 14 wks when I was still heavily bleeding we went to his old station and listened with a medic doppler. When we got a heartbeat I made an appt. A few days later at 14.5 wks a u/s revealed our 1st set of twins. Bleeding caused by a subchorionic hemorrahage, which eventually took care of itself. But it so changed dh's heart and how the Lord was truly in control, children are such a blessing and how we had no control over this that his heart completely changed. He had a hard time giving up the whole idea of b/c so after they were born I played aorund with it but was not regular about taking it. I nursed the twins until they were 9 months old and I was pregnant again. My milk dried up once I was pregnant, as it has proven to do each and every time after that. I can get pregnant quickly even while exclusively nursing but it always dries up rather quickly once I am pregnant. After #6 was born we never used b/c again and when he was only 4 months old I was pregnant again...so #6 & 7 are very close in age. When he was only 5 months old and I was still nursing #7 exclusively I was pregnant again. There are babies where I never get my cycle back before I am pregnant again and then there are a few that I've had one cycle. When it never comes back I get suspicious, which seems to always end in a + test. LOL! When she was 6 months old (she was the one I actually had 1 cycle after at 5 months) I was pregnant again. We lost that little boy at 14 wks gestation. It was a very long arduous m/c that lasted a total of 13 wks and ended in hemorrhaging and a stay in the hospital. I passed him 10 wks after the m/c actually started and then continued to bleed for another 2 wks after that. I was told by the hospital dr's I'd probably never have any more children due to hormone induced infertility because of how badly the m/c messed up my hormones and system. Only 9 wks after I quit bleeding I very amazingly ovulated and was pregnant again....with twins! We feel very very blessed to be doing this again...just to have another baby but also to have the amazing miracle of twins twice. Our yongest right now who is almost 2 and these babies will actually be the farthest apart we have had children in many yrs. The last ones we had this far apart were #2 & 3 which are separated by 2 1/2 yrs. The rest are (3 to 4&5) 18 mo, (4&5 to6) 18 mo, (6 to 7)13.5 mo and (7 to 8) 15 mo apart. (#8 to 9 &10) will be almost 2 yrs apart. I got to thinking about it the other day though and we will have 7 children 6 and under. That's a funny thought to me.

I do have a very dear friend that goes through the same thing you do and as long as she is nursing she does not ever have a cycle until no less than 17-18 months after baby. It drives her nuts. She's now pregnant with her 6th but her last 2 are 3 yrs apart completely naturally. My sister also has children naturally spaced 3 yrs apart due to nursing.

Knowing my milk just naturally dries up after I get pregnant again my goal this time is to really work on the supply and see if I can keep it going so I can nurse these guys a little onger even if I do end up pregnant again very quickly. I think perhaps because I nursed our 1st set of twins so well that may have played a part in why it took an entire 9 months to get pregnant again....but then I also played around with b/c after they were born too, so who knows. It was double the milk demand on my body so it may have had a little to do with both. I'm thinking I may have a little longer break between these babies and my next pregnancy once these little guys get here just due to nursing twins again. But, if not, I want to be prepared to deal with a falling milk supply due to being pregnant again.

And yes....we feel very very blessed in every way! I really do love kids and I absoutely love having a large family. I have a blog if you're interested in reading. I'd have to PM you the link though cause I'm fairly certain you can't publish the link on here publicly.

And never in my life do I ever have this much time to stay on the computer...especially on forums. But, given the fact I've been told to lay low to keep contractions at bay I have spent more time on the computer in the last week than I have in the last 2 yrs....thus the long, too informative posts y'all are being subjected to. LOL!

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#9 of 32 Old 09-25-2010, 01:33 AM
 
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I UC'd twins in 2007. Can't wait to hear your birth story!

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#10 of 32 Old 09-25-2010, 01:43 AM
 
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What kind of twins are you having now(mono/di,di/di) and what kind did you have before?

Mother to  Joaquin 10-13-00ribboncesarean.gif , Israel 9-5-2008 hbac.gif Judah 01-26-11hbac.gif Jax 01-26-11ribboncesarean.gif
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#11 of 32 Old 09-25-2010, 10:24 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Our 1st set are di/di fraternals and these two are di/di as well. The u/s tech was sure to inform us that did not rule out them being ID, which I already knew. But given the fact I've had so many previous pregnancies, we already have a set of frats, the fact I'm 34 and the fact my hormones were so screwed up from the m/c that took place right before this pregnancy we're assuming these 2 are fraternal as well. What's funny....I have no twins on my side of the family at all! So, family history doesn't count in this case. LOL!

Their placentas have already fused so it will be just one big one to deliver. With our 1st set they fused so early on we were told the entire pregnancy they were ID based on the one placenta. But....they came out with blond and red hair. After we got the pathlogy report back on the placenta it stated thet the site of fusion took place so early on that it was almost undectable by the lab. At the 21 wks u/s with this pregnancy they could actually tell really well where these placentas had fused. 33 wk u/s was much more difficult but I think babies were so big at that point it just squished everything up.

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#12 of 32 Old 09-25-2010, 10:40 AM
 
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mamarabbit~ i think i remember reading your birth story. i LOVE reading uc stories and twins ones are even more fascinating!!! i can't imagine going through the pushing phase twice.

medicinemansgirl~ thank you so much for typing all of that out! i'm glad you're getting rest! i struggled with not wanting to get pg in the first year (not knowing i couldn't anyway!), b/c i didn't want to lose my milk (i truly believe mamas milk is best for babies), and leaving it to God to choose how many children and when they were to come to us. i ended up choosing to keep my milk until after 1 yr, and then becoming lax about dtd. i ended up getting pg and losing my milk, but they were old enough at that point to just dry nurse, and then tandem with the next baby. so as soon as you get pg and lose your milk, you just put them on formula? doesn't that upset their tummies? or do you mix the two for some time until you lose your milk? (again, i'm asking b/c i've always wanted to know and people get offended when you ask these questions. i'm one of those insanely curious people about the workings of the human body- i'm an anatomy and physiology professor. i really appreciate you taking the time to answer my questions.).

i also think it's awesome that you have the patience to have so many kids. i will accept whatever God gives me (although dh is DONE, but never got the V), but sometimes when the kids are all fighting or whatever, i feel like i can't handle it all, and i only have 3! people think i was nuts to get pg with the third, can you imagine?!!! when i announced my third pg, my brother said to me "well, it's ok this time, but it will be a f***ing disaster if you get pg again." disaster?!!! i told him that a tornado ripping our home away or me getting breast cancer would be a disaster, not having another baby, and that i happen to feel very blessed. i'm hoping for another lately, dh says no. but when you use only the withdrawal system (hasn't failed us in 14 years!) i'd think that eventually you'll get "burnt". his problem is that he feels that he wouldn't be able to give them the individual time that children need. i guess i can understand that, but i really feel that we need to accept all children that God wants to give us. we'll see...

take care! rest up mama!!!

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#13 of 32 Old 09-25-2010, 12:37 PM
 
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^^ the pushing phase lasted all of about 3 pushes for the first and one big push for the second

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#14 of 32 Old 09-25-2010, 07:29 PM
 
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thanks for answering my question, i was told mine share a placenta but it's seems plausible that they were mistaken like happened with yours, i guess we will see.

Mother to  Joaquin 10-13-00ribboncesarean.gif , Israel 9-5-2008 hbac.gif Judah 01-26-11hbac.gif Jax 01-26-11ribboncesarean.gif
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#15 of 32 Old 09-26-2010, 06:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by jee'smom View Post
mamarabbit~ i think i remember reading your birth story. i LOVE reading uc stories and twins ones are even more fascinating!!! i can't imagine going through the pushing phase twice.

medicinemansgirl~ thank you so much for typing all of that out! i'm glad you're getting rest! i struggled with not wanting to get pg in the first year (not knowing i couldn't anyway!), b/c i didn't want to lose my milk (i truly believe mamas milk is best for babies), and leaving it to God to choose how many children and when they were to come to us. i ended up choosing to keep my milk until after 1 yr, and then becoming lax about dtd. i ended up getting pg and losing my milk, but they were old enough at that point to just dry nurse, and then tandem with the next baby. so as soon as you get pg and lose your milk, you just put them on formula? doesn't that upset their tummies? or do you mix the two for some time until you lose your milk? (again, i'm asking b/c i've always wanted to know and people get offended when you ask these questions. i'm one of those insanely curious people about the workings of the human body- i'm an anatomy and physiology professor. i really appreciate you taking the time to answer my questions.).

i also think it's awesome that you have the patience to have so many kids. i will accept whatever God gives me (although dh is DONE, but never got the V), but sometimes when the kids are all fighting or whatever, i feel like i can't handle it all, and i only have 3! people think i was nuts to get pg with the third, can you imagine?!!! when i announced my third pg, my brother said to me "well, it's ok this time, but it will be a f***ing disaster if you get pg again." disaster?!!! i told him that a tornado ripping our home away or me getting breast cancer would be a disaster, not having another baby, and that i happen to feel very blessed. i'm hoping for another lately, dh says no. but when you use only the withdrawal system (hasn't failed us in 14 years!) i'd think that eventually you'll get "burnt". his problem is that he feels that he wouldn't be able to give them the individual time that children need. i guess i can understand that, but i really feel that we need to accept all children that God wants to give us. we'll see...

take care! rest up mama!!!
We defintely had some major opposition to overcome wen we chose to keep going....especially with dh's parents. They thought we shouldn't have had #3 and when I ended up pregnant with twins after her they pitched a fit. So, when #6 came along only 9 months after they were born we just didn't even bother telling them. They found out through the grapevine when I was 20 wks and we already knew he was a boy. It embarrassed them to death to not be in the know but after that we just set some boundaries and established the fact we aren't going to put up with opinions and the absolute pessimism they spewed from their mouths. They still quietly disagree though they love the chidlren dearly. And we get ALL kinds of opinions frm the general public...mostly good ones but then you always seem to get the ones that look at chidren in general in utter disgust. After awhile wej ust got really used to it. We just laugh it off now and it's actually become pretty amusing. But, for the most part...I think once we had #7 there really has been very little negative feedback. People usually comment on how well behaved they are, want to know ages and then continue on. It's a good place to be after quite a few years of appalling and shocking comments. LOL!

As for the breastfeeding, I don't ever have enough to both pump and feed baby. Whatever I have is always going into the babby and there's not much to stock up on. It is frustrating....very very frustrating. When my milk begins to dry up it is an entirely hard transition and we usually go through a period where they asbolutely refuse to take a bottle and there's just nothing left to nurse them with. This is with having tried every herbal natural homeopathic remedy in the book. I've taken them all. It lasts about 2 weeks and it's a misreable, heart wrenching 2 weeks. I found that 9 months is usually a good age to make the transition with little to no fuss but anything earlier than that is just stressful for everybody. So, this time I've already talked to a lactation consultant. During this pregnancy we actually discovered my thyroid level is on the low end of the normal range and this probably is contributing to low milk supply to begin with. So, we're going to trouble shoot a little. I'm desperate enough that I've already decided I'll take domperidone if it just starts to fall off like it has in the past. It's worth it to me. So, I figure we'll go the natural route and really working on boosting it up in the beginning to hopefully hold it there but, if not, I can resort to that. Hopefully this will hold the supply up there during another pregnancy also. We'll see. I also found that when I took any kind of b/c it almost immediately dried up my supply just like being pregnant does. All the lovely things your dr never tells you. I started back on the pill when #2 was only 6 wks old and was clueless as to why I lost all of my milk. It wasn't until years later I discovered this is one of the hallmark symptoms of the pill. Ugh. Anyway, for now, I just nurse exclusively until I am pregnant again and then it just dries up on its own and we switch to goat's milk.

As for the one on one time...I've actually found that we spend more time together as a family than what a normal family does. When we only had a few we watched much more TV and stayed entertained by "stuff" so much more of the time. With this many we don't even watch TV and have to scale down on what things we have to entertain due to budget constraints. THey also spend lots and lots more time outside rather than inside in front of screens and things that entertain that way. So, though it is not one on one time, per say, the children actually get much more parent oriented time than they ever did when we had just 3. It definitely changes your perspective and brings to light what the American standard of living is vs what is really bringing a family closer together and creating quality time. And I think once you get to this point you just find time for one on one. I get to where i look for opportunities. Since dh has 24 hr shifts I alternate nights with the oldest 3 and let them stay up with me after everyone else goes to bed. We talk, read, watch a movie together or whatever...just that one child. Funny enough, they are the ones always requesting another sibling or 2 or 3 get in on the party. So, it usually ends up being about 3 kids instead of just the one I started with. When I was having prenatal appts I'd alternate and take just one of them with me and we'd make a lunch date out of it. You can just always find a way...and I"ve found that this many just creates such a closer bond between all of the family members. They're all needed to make it all run and be on time anywhere so they each have thier place and are confident in their spot in the family and the fact they are very much wanted, needed and appreciated for the help that is required of them.

I know the large family is not for everyone but for those who do get to experience it, it's an amazing thing. The dynamic of it never ceases to amaze me. I think it grows each individual in the family, including each parent, into a much better person who's been taught to respect others and look so much farther than themselves.

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#16 of 32 Old 09-26-2010, 06:55 PM
 
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I UC'd twins in 2007. Can't wait to hear your birth story!
I actually read your birth story recently... I don't remember what I searched for but it came up... was very lovely.

This is a tree on fire with love, but it's still scary since most people think love only looks like one thing instead of the whole world. *
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#17 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 10:16 AM
 
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medicinemansgirl~ wow, thank you so much for that reply! that was beautiful!!!

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#18 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 10:34 AM
 
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Thank you Mackenzie! I usually update it with current birthday pics. I need to put their 3rd birthday on there!

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#19 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 10:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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mamarabbit...I read your story at the very beginning when we started thinking of all of this but I need to go reread!! Trying to read at least 2 positive stories a day. Was there a "ring of fire" with the 2nd baby? That's always the most dreaded part for me. I've always had dry births though so this will be my 1st water birth. Hoping that really helps with it all. But it gets to where I dread pushing just because of the burn. And were the contractions just as intense or was it more like placental cramps or just pressure when baby B was ready?

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#20 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 02:10 PM
 
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They were small babies, around 6.5 pounds, so I didn't really get a ring of fire. The 2nd one was posterior and hurt like hell when she dropped down into place. And I think there was a bit more burn because she was a tiny bit bigger and posterior. Only 8 minutes between births.

ETA: I just added the 3rd birthday pic and bumped the birth story to the top of the Birth Stories forum

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#21 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 03:12 PM
 
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rabbitmama~ i read your birth story last night and remembered that i had in fact read your story many times. it is SO beautiful!!! i thought that was you that i remembered reading. i'm so glad you posted updated pics! they're beautiful!!! how can you tell them apart? does one or the other have a distinguishing feature?

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#22 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 03:15 PM
 
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so when you give birth to the second, it's just as bad as the first?! or a little easier, generally speaking- i know everyone's different. i always thought the first would stretch you out a little or pave the way for the second.

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#23 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 03:17 PM
 
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Medicinemansgirl-
I've found that even though I only have 4 right now, they do tend to want to be together more. The olders ones love helping with the baby. And same for when its stay up late night. My oldest will ask if the next oldest can stay up too. And vice versa. I love large families for this very reason. There isn't so much selfishness going around. You still have your moments of that toy is mine or its my turn, but the general vibe is family. And hubby and I also are the same way. We typically don't go anywhere when invited if its not kid friendly. We go as a family. His command picnics, he won't go unless he gets to come home and get us. Even my baby shower is kid friendly. We are having it a park so everyone can come. Husbands included. We're BBQ'ing for it. Not sure how many more kids we are going to have, if any more. I want more. But we are definitely needing a break.
That sucks about your milk drying up. I haven't made it past the 6 month mark for one reason or another.

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03/02: 11/05: 01/08: 10-18-09: 10-31-10 and 7/22/13 with twins and just found out we're pos.gif again!!chicken3.gif

 

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#24 of 32 Old 09-27-2010, 03:36 PM
 
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i think that's awesome about big families not being so selfish, and i agree. i think something happens when you go from 2 to 3... one always has to wait their turn, instead of having only 1 or 2 children, where their needs are met immediately, because there is noone else waiting, yk? i love that my children are learning that the world does not revolve around them. (don't get me wrong, i love them and try to put them all first when i can, but they are not the most important person in the whole wide world, they have a brother and/or sisters that are just as important.) i hope i make sense. i've seen a lot of families that have 1 or 2 children that the parents jump for everything, and the kids come to "expect" it at all times, which makes them difficult people to be around. (this is a generalization, there are a lot of lovely children that are onlies or have only one sibling). anyway, i do love the big family mentality. just my opinion.

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#25 of 32 Old 09-28-2010, 12:13 AM
 
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The 1st one definitely paves the way for the next one. In mycase though, the 2nd one was posterior.

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#26 of 32 Old 09-29-2010, 09:13 PM
 
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I love to hear about UCing twins. UC rocks!
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#27 of 32 Old 09-29-2010, 09:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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With my 1st twin birth since they were delivered by an OB....a great one that we FINALLY found that would deliver them with B breech.....it wasn't really like experiencing the actual twin part of birth with pushing both babies out. Since he had no prenatal history on me he didn't want to risk a good thing so after I pushed A out vertex he waited a few minutes. After about 4 minutes when I wasn't contracting again yet and B had gone way up high and transverse at that point he just reached in and grabbed him by the feet and pulled him out breech. So, there was not really any "delivering" to him on my part. The reaching in and pulling him down was more than a bit uncomfortable but as for the ring of fire and what it would be to actually deliver two babies...I kind of missed that part. Thus the question about the whole ring of fire twice and stuff. I'm hoping since these are both vertex that B will just fall right down into A's vacated space and come right on out only a few minutes after A's arrival.

And everything we do is family oriented. We even grocery shop together as a family. People are still stunned we take all 8 but it's a pain in the butt to get a babysitter and funds are rarely there for babysitters anyway. I figure it's just good training experience and it is a constnt teaching/learning experience of how to behave in public, what is expected of them and so on. I also really believe children should be mature in their youth so it's a great experience in learning to deal with the general public, both the positive and negative opinions voiced about the family size, how to address other adults respectfully, manners, etc.

And mamarabbit....love the 3 yr pic of your girls!!! They are so cute!

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#28 of 32 Old 10-01-2010, 12:05 AM
 
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what do you mean by "i believe that children should be mature in their youth."

Keri ~ Wife to dh Mommy to dd 11 whistling.gif ds 9 bouncy.gif  dd 6 1/2 kid.gif 
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#29 of 32 Old 10-01-2010, 12:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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what do you mean by "i believe that children should be mature in their youth."
Oh...definitely nothing like stripping their childhood away from them. LOL! Just basically what I stated above. Well behaved and well spoken. "That they know how to deal with the general public, both the positive and negative opinions voiced about the family size and how to address the comments, how to address other adults respectfully, manners, etc." I know that we peronally know a ton of homeschoolers...more specifically girls...that are raised to be this idealistic, babyfied, innocent, naive little thing. It is common to hear other homeschooling girls calling their moms "mommy" at the age of 17 and 18 and even 20. It just grates on my nerves. It's like they think it's this innocent, virginic, sexy type of naivety...and, honestly, I can't think of anyone in the professional world that will take a person seriously who still continues to call her mom "mommy". Do you really go into an interview or serve on a mission board or pratice as an RN and convince people you are capable when you are still tied to your mama's apron strings and calling home for mommy??? To me, it's about maturity and presenting yourself capable of the job at hand. Since I was very very sheltered and homeschooled from 3rd to 12th grade it hits close to home. I hit the world and didn't have a clue and got into a ton of trouble because of it. I was easily swayed and ended up living with a convict because I had no knowledge of anything other than a sheltered life where evil did not exist. I do not ever wish to throw my children out to the wolves so believe in thoroughly educating them but still protecting their hearts. I was never truly educated. One of those things where if you don't see it it's not really there. So, it's important for both dh and I to instill in them character and teach wisdom and discernment even in their youth. Since we homeschool we start the morning with Bible and teach a lot of Proverbs for Children curriculum based stuff...basically of just learning to be wise and alot of life principles. I don't put up with a lot of silliness either..mainly because it just drives me nuts. They can laugh and tease and have a good time but just don't be babyfied and silly about it....more specifically, don't act like you're 3 when you're really 7 or 10. And I see alot of kids today just out of control and parents just throwing their hands up with the whole "the kid's gonna be a kid" thing. So many children don't know how to relate to adults or act appropriately around them....because they are only exposed to peers their age or never really taught. We teach yes ma'am and yes sir, no ma'am and no sir, they hold open doors for others..or well....the little ones are getting there!!....and are not afraid to address adults. And we don't do everything for them. Our 12 yr old wanted a 5 ft snake he killed skinned but in order to do it he had 24 hrs to have it out of the freezer...I don't do snakes in the kitchen freezer!!...and he had to be the one to make the neccessary phone calls to deal with it. So, he did, made all of his own phone calls, found the best price and now proudly has a 5 ft snake skin hanging on the bedroom wall...along with an apprenticeship under the man who helped him do it. Pretty amazing! We're also very involved politically as a family. I think they just need to know this stuff and how life works...what makes the world go around...and how to deal with it all and do their part.

Not that we ever even begin to have it altogether or know what we're doing but at least the goal is to raise educated, happy, well spoken children that are well behaved and can exercise wisdom and discernment even in their youth and the choices that are made from a young age. Basically....just what every parent wants for their children.

Blessed wife of a firefighter/paramedic and mom to 10...including 2 sets of very surprise twins!....with a sweet tiny boy welcomed into heaven at 14 wks gestation in 9/09
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#30 of 32 Old 10-09-2010, 05:13 AM
 
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Well, can't say I read every word in this thread, as I'm pretty tired, but just wanted to say that I'm planning UC with my twins. They will be my first babies.
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