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#31 of 50 Old 03-18-2012, 05:59 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Almi View Post

In all honesty though, I think the safest way to give birth is not a specific where or how, but on a more individual basis; it is where and how the mother feels is best/safest.  That is what I've concluded after going back and forth between what is safe and what is not.

 

 

I absolutely agree with this. 

 

I just wanted to clear up the other stuff because of some of the other threads I've been reading around birth boards recently... I didn't want anyone jumping on you or creating a fight.
 

 

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#32 of 50 Old 03-18-2012, 10:10 PM
 
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Twins at home worries me, not because it can't be done, but because there are so many potential difficulties that one cannot prepare for just by reading alone. As the initial poster said, this was not her first choice, but rather other options were not available to her. I think one of the reasons that this for of birth is increasing in popularaity is a true
Lack of options for women to birth in a situation that they are comfortable with and can afford.

My concern for this mother chosing to UC is that cost is such a core part of her decision making. I do no doubt that other women will and have chose to have twins at home because this is what they want, but how many are having their children at home because they can't afford other options?

The debate about home birth/UC is not about the safety of it. For truly low risk women, the risk of needed emergency medical intervention is low. If a catastrophe occurs, it likely will not matter on the location, although they may be a small advantage of being in hospital. The debate should be about why women are forced to chose this route when they may have been happy with a midwives but this option was not available to them (for cost of actual lack of availability). Women chosing to give birth at home, with or without assistance should be treated in hospital no different then those that planned to deliver there.

All sides contribute to this problem. Until ALL maternity care providers agree to work as a team for moms and babies, these debates will continue. However, these debates rarely focus on the core issues, but rather pit on side against the other. Not all obstetricians are out to do a c-section, not all midwives are equally trained and not all mothers fully understand the rises they are taking in child birth. I am not saying one way to give birth is better than another, but I do believe that all care providers in this system should have the same goal of a heathy mom and healthy baby, wherever and whenever possible. It is about moms and babies, not about the care providers.

Would I have twins a home - no, but that is my choice. Should she have twins at home, none of us on this board can make this decision for her, nor should we. We can all just offer opinions. Ultimately she will have to make a choice and hopefully have an safe delivery and two health babies wherever she decides to deliver.

Sorry about the ramble

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#33 of 50 Old 03-19-2012, 05:13 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Haelmoon View Post

Twins at home worries me, not because it can't be done, but because there are so many potential difficulties that one cannot prepare for just by reading alone. As the initial poster said, this was not her first choice, but rather other options were not available to her. I think one of the reasons that this for of birth is increasing in popularaity is a true
Lack of options for women to birth in a situation that they are comfortable with and can afford.
My concern for this mother chosing to UC is that cost is such a core part of her decision making. I do no doubt that other women will and have chose to have twins at home because this is what they want, but how many are having their children at home because they can't afford other options?
The debate about home birth/UC is not about the safety of it. For truly low risk women, the risk of needed emergency medical intervention is low. If a catastrophe occurs, it likely will not matter on the location, although they may be a small advantage of being in hospital. The debate should be about why women are forced to chose this route when they may have been happy with a midwives but this option was not available to them (for cost of actual lack of availability). Women chosing to give birth at home, with or without assistance should be treated in hospital no different then those that planned to deliver there.
All sides contribute to this problem. Until ALL maternity care providers agree to work as a team for moms and babies, these debates will continue. However, these debates rarely focus on the core issues, but rather pit on side against the other. Not all obstetricians are out to do a c-section, not all midwives are equally trained and not all mothers fully understand the rises they are taking in child birth. I am not saying one way to give birth is better than another, but I do believe that all care providers in this system should have the same goal of a heathy mom and healthy baby, wherever and whenever possible. It is about moms and babies, not about the care providers.
Would I have twins a home - no, but that is my choice. Should she have twins at home, none of us on this board can make this decision for her, nor should we. We can all just offer opinions. Ultimately she will have to make a choice and hopefully have an safe delivery and two health babies wherever she decides to deliver.
Sorry about the ramble


I also agree with you that cost should not be the main factor in deciding to uc... I think there was a thread about that a while back. I think most women just consider it an added bonus/partial factor. Unfortunately, and maybe I am just a cynic, I don't think all maternity care providers/insurance companies/hospitals, etc are going to start working with moms any better anytime soon. Even if midwifery were more accessible in cost, legality, more mws, I think that would come at the cost of becoming more and more regulated, so twin birth probably wouldn't be allowed at home anyway. There are definitely geographic pockets where it is much more difficult to find hcps than other places... I also think market forces so to speak are against women interested in natural birth/homebirth since they are still the great minority in many places.

 

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#34 of 50 Old 03-19-2012, 06:01 PM
 
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Well said Haelmoon.  I'd like to see the day I feel comfortable birthing in the hospital.  Not that I have a terrible OB.  It's hospital policy and the potential of getting a nurse that I don't get along with...really the nurses are the ones taking care of you and having an effect on your doctor's decisions.

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#35 of 50 Old 03-20-2012, 12:42 AM
 
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http://www.infoocean.info/avatar3.jpgI would recommend that you search the old posts on this forum.

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#36 of 50 Old 03-20-2012, 01:34 PM
 
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Just for the record- I don't UC for cost purposes. Although yes...that is a perk by all means....but it is not my deciding factor.

Here are my main factors for choosing to UC-
I HATED everything about my hospital experience except that the nurses were my personal maids for a couple of days.

I was constantly going head to head with my dr over every decision. And anytime I went against the grain he treated me poorly and would even threaten me in some ways. And the sad thing was that he was one of the few "good" drs in the area.

Drs. don't seem to want to stay in this area for very long. Normally no more than ten years....IF that. So you don't get a good feel for their rep...because by the time their rep is known...they are moving to a new town. In the past 6ish years we have went through 3 family drs....as they all left the area. And the only ones that have stayed in the area have complaint lists longer than my arm. 0_o

I am a very hands off type of person. I am not big on how much drs try to play God as well as how they seem so negative. They treat birth as a medical issue, not as the miracle it is. And I hate how they think they know more about my body than I do.

I hate being tested for something that is a one in a bazillion chance that it will happen. And chances are...even if tested positive, not something that can be changed. It many times just adds more stress to the situation.

I don't feel comfortable with a male OBGYN and until recently, there were not any lady OBGYNs. Currently in my area there is only one lady OBGYN and she is always booked. Plus, even though her clients all really like her, I have seen a trend of baby/mother complications follow her like a shadow.

We don't have a lot of midwives in the area and I haven't like most of the few options. Plus I don't like that many of them are not much less hands off than a dr. They still require the same tests and many of the same protocols....they will just delivery you at home. If I am going to do a homebirth, I want it to be MY way....not someone elses.

Homebirths are so much more peaceful. And normally without medical issue.


But with all of that being said, I don't believe that everyone should homebirth. People that are high risk or that are not knowledgeable enough shouldn't homebirth. Now I think that if people changed their health/medical habits, many more woman would be less likely to be high risk and could birth at home if they wanted. But the biggest thing is for the woman to feel comfortable were they are birthing.....for me that is my house.

And I personally don't suggest for people to UC for the first birth unless they are VERY knowledgeable.

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#37 of 50 Old 03-28-2012, 05:02 PM
 
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I have a friend who delivered her twins at home. Fraternal - one head down and one breech. She had midwives present. Good luck to you!!
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#38 of 50 Old 04-05-2012, 08:31 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlessedOne View Post


I am a very hands off type of person. I am not big on how much drs try to play God as well as how they seem so negative. They treat birth as a medical issue, not as the miracle it is. And I hate how they think they know more about my body than I do.

 

I don't believe that everyone should homebirth. People that are high risk or that are not knowledgeable enough shouldn't homebirth. Now I think that if people changed their health/medical habits, many more woman would be less likely to be high risk and could birth at home if they wanted. But the biggest thing is for the woman to feel comfortable were they are birthing.....for me that is my house.

And I personally don't suggest for people to UC for the first birth unless they are VERY knowledgeable.


This.  And while I feel slightly more prepared for my second UC simply because I've done it before (so I was able to better put my birth kit together, basically...), I was actually less anxious the first time, oddly enough.

 

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#39 of 50 Old 04-12-2012, 01:57 PM
 
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I didn't get to read all the other post...but if no one has said it you should get your hands on a copy of "Psalm and Zoya, the Birth of Our Twins". If you have a trustbirth group in your area they may be able to help you get a copy to watch. It is so inspirational! You can google it too and see her story I think :) You can do it!! 

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#40 of 50 Old 04-14-2012, 02:24 PM
 
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Oh yes a completely unattended birth with twins, especially where you don't know the position of the twins, sounds like an excellent idea. I wait with bated breath to hear your birth story!


CNM mama.

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#41 of 50 Old 04-15-2012, 10:00 AM
 
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jaw.gif  Such negativity ladies! Wow! This is why I am cutting way back on posting. The amount of angry, rude, bitchy comments on MDC lately have gone waaaaaayy up.


belly.gif1***5****10****15****20****25****30****35heartbeat.gif***40babygirl.gif

 

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#42 of 50 Old 04-15-2012, 01:55 PM
 
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Originally Posted by holly6737 View Post

Oh yes a completely unattended birth with twins, especially where you don't know the position of the twins, sounds like an excellent idea. I wait with bated breath to hear your birth story!

Holly, you are a nurse/cnm? who believes in active management for 3rd stage for ALL birthing women, and thinks ucers are stupid enough to decide to rip out their placentas or try their own manual extractions, and in your perfect world UC wouldn't exist. (as per this thread http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1345672/nurses-pushing-on-stomach-after-birth-help). 

 

Here is the UA for this board:

 

 

Quote:

The Unassisted Childbirth (UC) board is a forum of support, respectful requests for information and sharing of ideas and experiences. While we will not restrict discussions only to those who birth without professional attendants, we will actively discourage individuals from posting with no sincere interest in exploring UC. Proselytizing against UC will not be permitted

 

You really have no business posting here especially with such attitude. And after her successful twin uc birth, you will say what? luck? In your view of birth most women will certainly fail/die without your wonderful interventions. Not the view of most people around here.


 

 

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#43 of 50 Old 04-15-2012, 03:28 PM
 
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Was I proselytizing against UC? I wasn't aware that was what I was doing.


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#44 of 50 Old 04-15-2012, 03:31 PM
 
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Do you have a sincere interest in exploring uc? or giving support or being respectful to those discussing the topic?

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#45 of 50 Old 04-15-2012, 04:12 PM
 
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I am very interested in the UC phenomenon from a sociological perspective.


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#46 of 50 Old 04-15-2012, 05:46 PM
 
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hahaha I'm sure you are. Doesn't mean u/a leaves room to make disrespectful, saracastic, snarky remarks.

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#47 of 50 Old 04-16-2012, 05:49 AM
 
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holly6737-

slmommy has already pointed out, your posts go against the forum guidlines.  Feel free to read and post, if you can post within the guidlines.  If you find that you can not stay within the guidlines, please refrain from posting in this forum.  Thanks.


 
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#48 of 50 Old 04-16-2012, 11:08 AM
 
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I guess I see no problem with UC'ing twins, it is quite minutely more "dangerous" than UC'ing a singleton, which, by the way, I had ZERO complications before, during, or after my twin UC.  That is less than a lot of other women with singletons can say.  But I also made my decision knowing I was healthy, babies were healthy/in a good position.  I also made my decision knowing when to transfer and what can go wrong in a twin labor/birth.

 

Yes, giving birth unassisted is taking a risk...so would have driving to the hospital on icy roads in the middle of winter.  And so would have birthing in the hospital, especially for a mama that isn't comfortable there.  For us, the benefit of UC outweighed the risks of hospital birth.

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#49 of 50 Old 04-17-2012, 09:33 AM
 
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To the OP, I totally get where you are coming from and when I read your initial post I definitely got that the main reason for UC was because of bad experiences with the hospital births. I was faced with the same thing when I was discussing homebirth with my first UC babe. My friend shared her uc story and not only was it beautiful but it just felt right and I was hooked after that. She'd had a UC but I intended to get a midwife for myself, that was, until I found out how much it was going to cost... $4,500!!! Yikes! As a young couple we didn't have that much money and I was so incredibly upset thinking that now I would be forced to birth in the hospital because THAT was covered by the ins. I dreaded doing that again, I had my son in the hospital and though it wasn't nearly as traumatic as other women have experienced, it was horrible for me and my son and I DID NOT want to do that again. I began looking for a Christian midwife hoping I'd find someone nearby that would work with us on the cost but rather came across a website about Christians that planned their UC's. After reading this article it hit me, God gave me this child (we'd lost a baby and I prayed to become pregnant 9 months later and in two weeks I was!) and it just made more sense to put my trust and faith in my heavenly Father rather than doctors or midwives. My husband was unsupportive of it, in fact he thought I was nuts and was hands off the whole pregnancy because he was angry with me. My mother also was concerned (she lived with us and would be present) and didn't agree but knowing how hard headed and stubborn I was she knew I'd be doing it anyways and began researching herself. I spent the next months researching and learning every possible thing that could go wrong, how to recognize it and stocking up on natural remedies to have on hand. I rented a dopler, bought an infant resuscitation bag and researched, researched, researched. When it finally came time to birth my husband was being a jerk and I cried in the bathroom and then told him off, told him I wanted to just go to a hotel and birth alone that I didn't need him. He felt awful and appologized sincerely and suddenly became extremely helpful with his laboring wife. The labor was slow in the beginning starting and stopping over 36 hours with real labor lasting about 6 hours before baby was born. My mother had the joy of being able to catch her granddaughter and do you know, after that she was ecstatic about homebirth and UC and told EVERYONE proudly how she'd delivered her granddaughter! My husband's view also changed and he was so glad that our daughter was born in such a loving environment.

 

All that to say that a choice to UC based on lack of money is not a bad reason to choose it, if we had the money we never would've experienced a UC the first time and likely would've been fearful of doing it alone in future births.

 

I agree with what others wrote about how problems can arise even with the most well researched parents during a UC or HB but I've seen that a lot of times it IS due to mothers or parents ignorning their instinct that something is off or a midwife so sure of themselves that they don't listen or respect the laboring woman when she voices her instinctual concerns. I think if we could change this and get all midwifes to not only respect the instincts of a laboring woman but teach her to trust and respect it herself that we'd have a LOT less of those sad stories out there.
 

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#50 of 50 Old 04-22-2012, 08:11 PM
 
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I just wanted to see how the OP and her babies are doing.  I hope that you had a smooth birth experience and that your sweet babies are letting you get some sleep. :)  I hope you check in when you get a chance and let us know how things went.  

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