What hangs folks up about UC can be so funny! - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 39 Old 04-17-2012, 06:59 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I recently told a friend of my husband's that we were planning a UC. He seemed to not understand although I was being REALLY clear and asked me exactly WHERE we would be giving birth and who would be there. I said we'd have the baby at home, possibly in the water, and that my husband, myself, and 'hopefully' a friend or doula would be there. 

 

He sort of blinked a lot, looked stunned and turned to my husband and said "but who will catch the baby?!" LOL. My husband pointed to me, and I calmly replied that I actually intended to catch the baby myself pending some sort of issue where I needed my husband to do it. 

 

This friend of ours, again looked stunned and asked how that was POSSIBLE. lol and then seemed quite concerned that I'd just pop this baby out full steam on the hardwood floor thereby hurting it! OMG! 

 

I just thought it was sort of funny because of all the things someone could bring up about a UC and why it might not be a good choice (in their opinion), the logistics of how one would catch their baby was pretty far off my radar. lol!


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#2 of 39 Old 04-17-2012, 08:41 AM
 
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That is hilarious! I love the responses some people have, not much bothers me about what they say especially with 2 under my belt already. Either I don't get out much now or people in ohio are less nosy than in Cali cause when I was preggo with my first UC babe I was questioned a TON of times by strangers on what hospital I was birthing at and had the chance to share with them; it was met with some that were intrigued, others that were shocked and then the rest that told me it was dangerous. I enjoyed the opportunity to inform and debate the validity of their concerns but I'm the stubborn, hard headed, argumentative type : D
 

The only time I was frustrated was with people from church, they were all so insanely concerned with some claiming they would drag me to the hospital while I was in labor and other still that had been nurses telling me the horrors they'd seen... All I could say was, how do you think all the women in the bible birthed?!

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#3 of 39 Old 04-17-2012, 01:17 PM
 
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Eh, people are all caught up in their "one right way."

 

Everyone at my workplace (which is a lot of people, as I work at Walmart) know that I UC my babies and they are either supportive or just don't give their opinion - they respect that it is my choice.  That's all I can really ask for.  It is amusing when people just can't grasp the concept though. :)

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#4 of 39 Old 04-17-2012, 08:33 PM
 
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yep i feel you. got all sorts of crazyness from people when i was planing a MW homebirth and even more so when I switched to a UBAC.

 

 My favorites where the 'what ifs' and horror stories from people who had PRE EXISTING CONDITIONS.

I mean, really?  unless I developed those during pregnancy it is totally not relevant to if I can UC or not. eyesroll.gif


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#5 of 39 Old 04-23-2012, 07:32 PM
 
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yeah I have dealt with this a lot over the last 6 years of UCing. People are stunned and ask all kinds of dumb questions or say dumb things.
I don't mind people being generally interested, but when some people have no interest in it but just want to quiz me on my intelligence...it is very annoying.

They think we just jump into this without a bit of knowledge....and THAT is so annoying! And oddly enough I hate how people try to make it out like some big thing that I birth at home (even if it is a good way). To me it is natural and should be normal but sadly it is considered "strange".
 

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#6 of 39 Old 04-29-2012, 05:45 PM
 
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The one thing every person hits on with me - and I mean EVERY SINGLE PERSON - is the dang cord. As soon as they find out I had my babies unassisted, the VERY FIRST question is always "but how did you cut the cord?!" I'm always ready with the answer immediately because I know it's coming.

 

With this last birth, I went to see a doctor three days later to make sure my tear was healing okay. Her very first question to me after asking where the baby was born? You guessed it. I wasn't expecting that question from a doctor!

 

I mean, really! Of all the things going on in childbirth and cutting the cord - something my dog can do - is the big thing? LOL!


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#7 of 39 Old 05-01-2012, 10:25 AM
 
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LOL, I had everyone and their mother asking me about the cord, including CPS.  They also asked me how I weighed my babies and dumb things like that.  I just showed them cord clamps, scissors...kitchen scale...all items that are quite easily obtainable. =P

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#8 of 39 Old 05-07-2012, 01:53 AM
 
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I wish I could do this. It's illegal to have a home birth in my state. I talk about it as a hypothetical sometimes, telling people that I wish I could do it, and I still get the same questions. Sometimes people get really mad about it oo, even though it's only a hypothetical in my case.


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#9 of 39 Old 05-07-2012, 04:37 AM
 
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My husband caught our first in the hospital, with an OB attending. My midwife and husband sort of both caught our second at home, I had intended to but I involuntarily pushed so hard I hurt my eyes and couldn't see, also I had to switch to hands and knees at the end. We had planned our first as a UC (had a long labor were the progress got stuck for a day and ended up needing some reassurance though). I had people who asked me how I'd get my epidural at home!

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#10 of 39 Old 05-07-2012, 04:39 AM
 
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It's not illegal to homebirth anywhere in the USA, it is illegal for a midwife to attend you at home, she could get in trouble. UC or homebirth with MW is legal for you, though I suppose CPS/DHS could worry about you over it if they caught wind of it.

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#11 of 39 Old 05-07-2012, 06:40 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JamieCatheryn View Post

It's not illegal to homebirth anywhere in the USA, it is illegal for a midwife to attend you at home, she could get in trouble. UC or homebirth with MW is legal for you, though I suppose CPS/DHS could worry about you over it if they caught wind of it.

 

Just to qualify-- as I'm sure JamieCathryn knows, but was just shorthanding-- it may be illegal in your state for a midwife to attend you at home, but that's not true in all or even most states.  However, like she said, simply giving birth at home, per se, is never illegal, anywhere in the US.


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#12 of 39 Old 05-08-2012, 12:37 AM
 
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I cannot stop laughing through these posts! How true, every one! I had a very lovely UC in Jan, and decided to go in later the next day to get a tear checked out. When I showed up and explained that I'd given birth and would like to get a tear checked, I saw jaws drop all over. They asked me over and over if I needed a wheelchair (obviously not, I felt pretty fantastic). When I went up to L&D, they couldn't believe I "was the one who gave birth"; they expected me to bust through the doors on a gurney. And what was the first question everybody asked me (even my own mother)? "How'd you cut the cord?" The cord?! That was seriously the last thing on my mind. But in every "sudden/unexpected" birth story I read on the news; somebody arrives just in time to cut the cord.... Or what? What happens if somebody doesn't tie it off and cut it right away??  It'll blow up? Run away with the baby?

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#13 of 39 Old 05-08-2012, 08:25 AM
 
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Yes, I'm sorry, I was clarifying for her case as she'd heard it was illegal in her state.

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#14 of 39 Old 05-08-2012, 05:29 PM
 
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Originally Posted by zenmamaski View Post

I cannot stop laughing through these posts! How true, every one! I had a very lovely UC in Jan, and decided to go in later the next day to get a tear checked out. When I showed up and explained that I'd given birth and would like to get a tear checked, I saw jaws drop all over. They asked me over and over if I needed a wheelchair (obviously not, I felt pretty fantastic). When I went up to L&D, they couldn't believe I "was the one who gave birth"; they expected me to bust through the doors on a gurney. And what was the first question everybody asked me (even my own mother)? "How'd you cut the cord?" The cord?! That was seriously the last thing on my mind. But in every "sudden/unexpected" birth story I read on the news; somebody arrives just in time to cut the cord.... Or what? What happens if somebody doesn't tie it off and cut it right away??  It'll blow up? Run away with the baby?

Hahaha!!  Right??  I'm surprised more people don't ask me what I do with my placenta, actually.

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#15 of 39 Old 05-10-2012, 01:49 AM
 
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LOL! Even us homebirthers ask each other what we did with our placentas! ROTFLMAO.gif


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#16 of 39 Old 05-10-2012, 01:44 PM
 
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Originally Posted by JamieCatheryn View Post

 I had people who asked me how I'd get my epidural at home!

 

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I had both my babies in a freestanding birth center but I am open about wanting a homebirth and always say that (attendant/safety/equipment-wise) it's the same as a homebirth, it's just not at my home. I frequently get the question about how my midwife does an epidural. And then they're SHOCKED when I say she doesn't. shake.gif


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#17 of 39 Old 05-10-2012, 02:19 PM
 
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about the cord .... it's sad but true, before I had my first baby (not at home) .... I really really really thought/believed that there was something very special-needing medical attention about the cord .... THEN I realised that all the books I had read until then were very slanted and actually not very informative enough for my taste ...

 

(and I did "catch" my third baby by myself, standing up in the restroom of my hospital room, after having sent DH to run after the nurse for something minutes before ....i now just cannot understand why the majority of people who know about it think it "strange/extraodinary/.... since I wish I had had all of my babies standing up, and alone, in retrospect ....)
 

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#18 of 39 Old 05-17-2012, 09:14 AM
 
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My close friend and pastor doesn't know anything but midwife as we told her back at about 3 months. then we found out UCing was legal so we are doing that. As that is what we feel God told us to do. Friend is a nurse by schooling. She just doesn't get it when I say at home. she just keeps saying H. Her girl who wanted natrual as you can get in H just had her baby with every drug they will give. She did not get what she wanted at all. that is the price you pay if you go to H. I'm not telling many people the truth till after, which is anytime now. One person i did tell asked, "how do you know what to do with cutting the cord." I thought You have got to be kidding me, that is her consern..........lol I have one very supportive freind in this all. She is fasinated by it. Hoping baby comes in day or 2 as all those who would make me tense with their nosies left for africa this morning, for 2 weeks!!!!!! they would get back just in time that I would be OK with people holding baby some. my hubby is hoping and praying same.
 


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#19 of 39 Old 05-17-2012, 09:20 AM
 
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Kathydavid.It is legal all over the USA. no where is it illegal. they will always tell you that if you ask a Dr or midwife. But that is not what law says.Checkout the ucing sites like unhinderliving and http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/uc-article-on-salon-2/

 

You can always just say ooops it happened fast. unplanned UC happen all the time.


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#20 of 39 Old 05-17-2012, 09:26 AM
 
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LOL! Even us homebirthers ask each other what we did with our placentas!

 

I find this ? and aswner very interesting. there are so many things you can do with it. from eating it to just trow it away or bury it or..........


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#21 of 39 Old 05-17-2012, 10:16 AM
 
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You can't legally throw it in the trash without incinerating it first or something. Burial or placentophagy are your best bets.

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#22 of 39 Old 05-17-2012, 03:26 PM
 
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the cord cutting question is soooo strange... lol.gif

My favorite story from my UC though is 'how did you weigh the baby?' well actually, I didn't. The home scale was broken so he wasn't weighed until 3 days later at the ped office.  

 

What strange reactions I've gotten to that... does it really matter how much the baby weighed if he was otherwise healthy? 


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#23 of 39 Old 05-18-2012, 03:47 PM
 
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 does it really matter how much the baby weighed if he was otherwise healthy? 

 

Sometimes, yes, if there's a reason to watch baby's weight carefully (IGT or previous history of supply or growth issues, or current health issues with baby, etc.) but I actually think it would be GOOD to not weigh babies right away sometimes, re: IV fluids in labour (or prior to section) causing water weight that they pee out in the first 24 hours making it look like they lost too much weight, thus resulting in unnecessary supplementation. But the easier way to solve that would simply be to take that into account if weight becomes an issue and adjust accordingly.... not that it would ever become standard practice, though.


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#24 of 39 Old 05-18-2012, 11:28 PM
 
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I love it when people ask how we cut the cord, because then I get to tell them we used the kitchen shears smile.gif

As for disposing of the placenta, how is tossing it any different from chuckling a piece of raw meat? We just wrapped ours up in a few plastic bags before putting it in the garbage.
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#25 of 39 Old 05-19-2012, 01:09 PM
 
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We're planning our first UC this September and I could not be more excited. Our first was an unmedicated hospital birth with a CNM (yeh, that was super wonderful- sarcasm) and the second was a planned homebirth turned ER trip (turned out not to be an emergency, but when the MW said "go now," we did). I so wish I could tell everyone we are planning to birth this babe just how we want! Well, anyway, I'm excited! And we planted our second placenta today. Somehow we manage to keep them in the freezer forever, until we need room for the next one :)


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#26 of 39 Old 05-21-2012, 07:22 PM
 
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You can't legally throw it in the trash without incinerating it first or something. Burial or placentophagy are your best bets.

 

Not that anyone would really be able to prosecute you for it unless someone saw you throwing it away and called the cops (in which case they'd have to care and/or know what you were throwing away).

 

Anyway, we, too, just wrapped our placentas in a few plastic bags and chucked them.  I planned on encapsulating the first and making placenta essence out of the second but it was just never prioritized or needed.

 

And now I'm really laughing because we have a dumpster diver living in our building, and last time I saw her going at it she was saying "yuck! ew! ick!"  I wonder if she ever found my placenta. XD

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#27 of 39 Old 05-31-2012, 12:02 PM
 
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How exciting, I'm also due mid-October planning a UC.  And I'm going to say, YES!  you can catch your own baby!!!  And it's the greatest feeling in the world and I can't wait to hear what that guy says when you do.  Best wishes and I hope to read more of your posts throughout the months. 

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#28 of 39 Old 05-31-2012, 12:04 PM
 
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Almi, that is too funny about the dumpster diver!  Hahaha! 

Meg

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#29 of 39 Old 05-31-2012, 12:06 PM
 
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And sorry, I'm being a serial poster.  As for the placenta, I've dug a hole in the ground and planted a tree over it for every baby I've birthed.  Born in winter?  No problem, freezers work great for that, just don't let any friends or family mistake it for a thick piece of sirloin.

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#30 of 39 Old 06-29-2012, 07:13 AM
 
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This is such a great thread!  Loving all these questions from strangers/friends/family.  The HORROR of someone having a baby at home!  LOL  


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