Would you UC again? - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-01-2012, 08:25 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Where I live, home birth is being challenged and the midwife I was seeing will not deliver my baby at home.  This is my second pregnancy.  My son was born in a hospital and the nurses/doctors were rude and rough.  They did not have any faith in me or my body.  I ended up with pitocin, Demerol, and an awful episiotomy.  Not the worst that could happen, I know.  But none of it was necessary and I was traumatized. This time around I don't even want to go that route.  Right now I am casually seeing a midwife/Ob team at a near by hospital, although I feel that is unnecessary also and just a huge ball of stress for me and therefore my baby.  My husband and I are secretly preparing for an unassisted home birth.  Only telling those who support us (my sister, who had a home birth, and my mother are all supporters)

 

I'm asking all mothers who have had a home birth with a midwife to share if they think they could have made it without one.  I'm also asking mothers who have birthed unassisted (planned or not) whether they would do it again.  I've read tons of birth stories and I'm not interested in reading a ton more.  I'd just like to know how experienced homebirthers feel about being unassisted. 

 

I personally feel prepared mentally,physically, and spiritually for this

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Old 06-01-2012, 08:54 AM
 
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I hired a midwife for my 1st 2 births. I loved her, she was an awesome lady and she helped shape my attitude and feelings around birthing. But I realized after having my 2nd that i didn't want her at my births =J not for any reason but that the births were my job .. my responsibility and having another person there with those same job descriptions was wrong for me. So when I found out i was expecting a 3rd I fully planned for UC. That birth went really really well for me .. better than my MW attended births 

 

To answer your 2nd question, after my 1st UC (3rd birth) I had another UC for my 4th child and am currently pg with #5 and planning another UC. # 4 was a really great birth and I am expecting this one to be as well.

 

You need to feel this situation out for yourself. I wish you all the best and hope that you find lots of support on your journey!

 

hugs

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Old 06-01-2012, 11:50 AM
 
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my 1st was an intended UC with a hospital transfer (i freaked in transition, no need for transfer) she was born perfectly 7 min. later.  the hopital was horrible to me and to her.

my 2nd was a UC.  it was perfect. normal. 

I am now pregnant with my 3rd and will UC this one.  there is no way you could convince me to go to a hospital after my 2 experiences.  Yes, there are reasons for hospitals - placenta previa, placenta abruption.  true reasons, of course i would go.  but other than that I cannot imagine doing it any other way.  Even if i found out it was twins i would UC.

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Old 06-01-2012, 12:38 PM
 
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My first was an intended Uc with a hospital transfer (i freaked in transition, no need to transfer) she was born 7 mins. later.  our whole experience there was horrid.

My 2nd was a UC waterbirth.  It was perfect. normal.  fun.

I am now pregnant with #3 and will definitely UC waterbirth again.  I know there are reasons for a hospital - placenta previa, placenta abruption, etc. - real emergencies.  other than that there is no way i would ever consider a hospital again. 

The UC at home was amazing and perfect for us.  But each family has to make their choice.

good luck!

Cayce

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Old 06-01-2012, 05:24 PM
 
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I think I may of just posted in the one in homebirth but YES. My first was a c\s 2cd a planed u\c and this one will be a u\c as well unless something comes up during pregnancy. 


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Old 06-01-2012, 10:07 PM
 
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This sounds like us!  Our midwife was no longer able to care for us so we are seeing an ob.  We hate it, but really wanted to make sure everything was great with baby along the way.  Now we are secretly preparing for our first UC!  The last 2 were with home births with midwives, which was great, but we really feel like we want it to just be us and baby this time.  We're due in 2 weeks!!!

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Old 06-02-2012, 08:53 PM - Thread Starter
 
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thank you for your responses! dreammama, good luck!

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Old 06-03-2012, 06:32 PM
 
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we uc 9 days ago. i hate Dr and anything to do with them. our uc was beuatiful as God ment it to be. i would do uc again in a heartbeat and so would my hubby. study so u know what to do and follow what you feel. everything goes good 98% of the time. you will know if you need med help http://www.unhinderedliving.com/childbirth.html


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Old 06-03-2012, 07:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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congratulations! and thanks for sharing that link, I read through it all a while ago. It really is the best site for UC.

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Old 06-04-2012, 12:54 PM
 
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I love midwives, but I didn't need one so i had a UC. Everything went perfectly, thanks be to god.
I would definetly UC again if I felt everything was progressing normally and I was healthy still.
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Old 06-06-2012, 04:24 PM
 
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I had two hospital births, first one was a horrible experience while the second was probably as pleasant as it gets in the hospital.  I UCd my third and currently pregnant with my fourth.  This time around I was certain I wanted a midwife and after a long search, found one that would travel to my area.  All it took was one rescheduled appointment on the part of my midwife and I thought, why am I paying someone when I already know I can do this myself?  So at this point I'm having another UC and my midwife will basically just charge me a small flat fee to come out after the baby is born to check us out and take care of the paperwork.  Sounds perfect to me :)

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Old 06-07-2012, 06:42 PM
 
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I would despise birthing in a hospital, and be annoyed/hindered by a midwife.

 

I freebirthed my twins and I recently freebirthed my third baby.  I'd definitely do it again.  I fear getting an epidural more than I fear natural childbirth.

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Old 06-13-2012, 10:30 PM
 
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UC'd with #6 (5th birth, b/c twins). Was my longest labour - which surprised me and led to self-doubt near transition. YES, I would do it again - it was finally RIGHT (and my other births were so low-intervention that many women would think them ideal).

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Not sure that I'm crunchy, but definitely a "tough chew".
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Old 06-14-2012, 04:11 PM
 
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I had a hospital birth first time, planned mw assisted home birth for the 2nd, which ended in transfer to hospital.  The 3rd was UC only because there is no option for home birth where we live now (in France).  I would totally do it again if we have another while we are here, but if I was back in the UK I would have a midwife.  Not really for the labour and birth, I loved doing that with just DH and I, but I think it would be nice to have someone come and do the newborn check and stitch if necessary.  


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Old 06-27-2012, 07:47 PM
 
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edit - didn't read the op thoroughly and my situation doesn't really fit what you're asking.  sorry!


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Old 06-28-2012, 01:30 AM
 
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Yes! I had both of my children unassisted. For the second, I did want a midwife in the next room, but only because we had moved and were so far from a hospital. As it turned out, my midwife was going to be out of town during the time I was going to give birth so I ended up having to UC again anyway, but we didn't need to transfer at all. I would definitely UC again if I were having another child, but I'm all done having kids. Hubs is getting a vasectomy.


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Old 07-07-2012, 07:53 PM
 
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I'm with you, afr2010, even my "world's best" crunchy midwife who was as sweet as pie and so non-controlling was unable to stop from stressing me out a couple of times. It's just the nature of what they do. And both stressor points were for nothing in the end.
 

I've had 2 full UPs and 3 UCs. This is my third UP, and anticipating, God willing, a 4th UC. I am especially in need of avoiding stress put on me as I suspect (healthy) multiples this time. So I'm not interested in raising our risks via all the fearmongering an OB and midwife could provide. I know what I need to do. I don't need further information shoved down my throat by worriers at this point.

 

I could've already been pushed into 2 c-sections without being able to free birth/homebirth my way. As it was, all my children are happy and healthy, and what's more, my husband and I grow closer with each new pregnancy adventure we do on our own together.

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Old 07-08-2012, 06:50 AM
 
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I've had two homebirths - one midwife assisted and one unassisted.  Loved both of them.  This third is planned as an unassisted birth as well.  Will proceed this way unless there's a problem. None anticipated!


Lizbiz, wife to my man who makes me smile, and mom to one bouncy boy (08/07), one sassy girl (12/09), and one sweet new boy (08/12).

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Old 07-08-2012, 11:30 PM
 
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I've had 3 UC's, so yes. :)


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Old 07-09-2012, 12:07 PM
 
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First, let me say that I'm not anti-UC. Second, I may have a UC if I get pregnant again, but I would really rather not. My last birth was a planned UC, but at the last minute, a friend of mine found a midwife for me. Honestly almost didn't call her to come, but in the end she was there. I'm totally healthy, fit, well-nourished, very educated, a trained first responder, NRP, have half of my midwifery degree, etc,etc, etc. When I felt my son grind to a halt with his head half-born, all I could do was say, "He's stuck!". Granted, there is the argument that if no one had been around, I would have taken action. Shoulder dystocias are actually my "thing" (I always seemed to get assigned them in exams or see them at births I attended), but there are a few maneuvres that I could, physically,

NOT have done on myself. I'm sure I could have talked someone else though them, but it would have taken time and luck and, quite honestly, I do not want to mess with my kid's health and well-being enough to rely on my being able to talk someone through unfamiliar moves during a stressful situation. Never mind trying to explain to a lay person what/how to do things in a coherent manner with a baby literally sitting in that "ring of fire". 

Anyway, the whole experience shook my faith in UC a bit. I think we would have been ok (as in, no one would have died) on our own, but I do believe that one or both of us (probably my son) would have had long(er?) term issues to deal with. As it was, it was not pretty. I am forever grateful to the midwife who met me at 38w2days and came to my birth a mere 6 days later. I think there's a lot of blind faith in birth in the UC community. I do support UC, but I think that the people who chose this path MUST be aware of the fact that, sometimes, birth doesn't go as smoothly as it could and, sometimes, a baby or a mama needs help. I guess I'm trying to say that, for me, no, I would not have a UC if there was the option of a midwife. 


For greater things are yet to come...

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Old 07-09-2012, 02:12 PM
 
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I actually had my first UC get "stuck." I was in an unfavorable position I suppose, when his head was born, but his shoulders were squared up, based on how they felt as they came through, as big feeling as his head or bigger. I quickly tried hands and knees and he flew out on the next push. It was an eeerie 30 seconds, and when all was said and done I was glad not to be in the hospital for that, at the very least. Because they would have had me on my back, they would have been screaming at me to push and panicking and frightening everyone, as I've read about so many times before, and might even have broken his collarbone attempting to extract him. Ina May's advice was to do just what I did instinctively, it's actually called the "Gaskin Maneuver." You aught to read about it. It's cool.

 

Oddly, that was also the birth where I felt no pain when pushing!

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Old 07-09-2012, 03:29 PM
 
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Oh, I've read, believe me! (like I said, for some reason, dystocias were always what seemed to fall to me in midwifery school). The Gaskin was my instinct too, but it was a true dystocia. The midwife had to do Rubins, and because no one wanted to/thought to do an episotomy, there was some pretty significant tearing. I'm just saying that, while rare, there are still some situations in which a trained attendant are extremely useful! 


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Old 07-09-2012, 07:58 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by quantumleap View Post

Oh, I've read, believe me! (like I said, for some reason, dystocias were always what seemed to fall to me in midwifery school). The Gaskin was my instinct too, but it was a true dystocia. The midwife had to do Rubins, and because no one wanted to/thought to do an episotomy, there was some pretty significant tearing. I'm just saying that, while rare, there are still some situations in which a trained attendant are extremely useful! 


Oh, I see. yikes! Well, I've never really had big babies (never over 7 pounds) and I'm probably not going to this time either... so it has never been something that keeps me up at night... but if I did, man, I'm sure it would change my perspective a bit, especially if Baby got stuck at all like that. It's one thing to have it resolve in one push from a new position... Sorry to hear about the tearing.... I've kinda thought tearing was better than cutting. What are your thoughts on that? Do you think you would rather tear or be cut, seeing the aftermath of both?

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Old 07-09-2012, 08:50 PM
 
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I have had three homebirths with midwives.  They were all amazing experiences, but the second one would have not gone very well for me if the midwife had not been there.  She had to do a manual placenta extraction really fast because I was bleeding so much.  It was scary after the fact.  During this part of the birth I was so out of it I was hardly even present with the people in the room.  If I were UCing (as I had seriously considered doing) I don't know if I would have had the presence of mind to tell my partner that I needed to go to a hospital - presumably he would have researched the birth process and would have known.  But it would have been very difficult to get there - an extremely bloody and incapacitated mama, a two year old, a newborn and a frantic dada, and a 20 minute ride to the emergency room.  I'm forever grateful to our midwife who was there, and took care of the whole thing.  I didn't even end up having to go the hospital.  So, to answer your question, no, I don't think I will UC if I ever have another baby.   

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Old 07-15-2012, 11:32 PM
 
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I had an unassisted homebirth in 2010. I feel like I would have to ultimately make that decision if I were to become pregnant again. But having another unassisted birth would definitely be my #1 choice unless I felt like another option was safer for that pregnancy. I have a very strong aversion to anyone trying to control labor or birth at all, and had a wonderful unassisted experience, despite the fact we transferred to the hospital after the birth. I was always safe, confident & comfortable and overall, yes I'd definitely do it again.
 

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Old 07-15-2012, 11:56 PM
 
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Yes, i had a UC with DD and i am again this time.  i loved everything about it and hope everything goes as perfectly this time as well, the experience was so amazing http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1274487/pandora-moonlillys-amazing-unassisted-birth
 


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Old 07-17-2012, 01:16 AM
 
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If I *ever* have another child, I would UC again. My 3rd child was my only UC and he had a birth injury(brain bleed from coming down so fast, doctor thinks he hit one of my bones) but I would definitely do it again in a heartbeat!


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Old 07-17-2012, 10:52 AM
 
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I do UC because I am very shoulder distocia prone.  I am also very dependent if I feel (even if I know otherwise) that another person can help.  Thus, if I have a doctor or midwife on hand, the shoulder distocia can get very ugly, whereas with me being the "expert", there is no other choice - so I just do it.

I want to UC again, but have a long list of "warning signs" that I would seek help for in a heartbeat.

I figure labor is pretty clear on when it needs help.

(here's my list of ones I remember - most are obvious something isn't going right)

If baby hasn't dropped when I go into labor, I wouldn't UC (all my babies have VERY long cords, and are at higher risk for cord prolapse.

Usually I get a high small leak, and my water doesn't break untill the baby is born.  This is perfect for UC for me, as I don't worry about infection like I would if my water was all the way broken for very long, but I can see that it is clear - if I saw blood before I was actually pushing the baby out, I would seek assistance.  The same if I saw old meconium (the old meconium can have gotten in the babies lungs for too long, deteriorating them and causing potentially fatal MAS.

I have short labors - if one was long, I'd seek help.

- can't remember any others.  To me, part of UC is listening to my body when it says it needs help - and getting it that help.

So I want to UC again, but if it doesn't turn out that way, then in a way it is all the same thing - listening to my body.

oh, we wouldn't go it alone with twins either - the whole long cord thing might be a problem.

hospitals are usefull if you use them (vs. them using you) so I would definantly go to one to have a premie or something. (hosp. is close by, so not much we can't do here, that they'd be able to do any faster there if we were there.)

UC is risky in some unpredictable situations - mostly cord entanglement.  We have long cords and have had UC's with a couple of true knots etc. that didn't affect the birth at all - but as much as I love UC, it has to be something you feel right about inside personally - well any birth choice needs to be.

Though, if you do a more medical UC, and listen to the heartbeat and stuff, the risks are probably lower.  I've thought about it, but checking on the heartbeat while my body is trying to push a baby out, seems looking for something wrong at the moment of truth, to me.

Told dh if we do go to a hospital, I'm hiring a thug to stand gard at the door, lol.

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Old 09-11-2012, 01:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'd just like to update everyone. I did UC! labor was amazing, never once wanted someone besides DH with me, never once thought about an epidural.  However pushing and delivery got scary, my water took it's good old time to break and I didn't have the urge to push until 1 1/2 hrs after "pushing stage" started. Baby girl was born covered in blood, I'm thinking partial placenta abruption? the cord was still pulsing though, which was a miracle. And the placenta did come out in one piece about 30 mins after baby but with a ton of blood and small clots too.   I'm so glad I wasn't in the hospital setting but next time I do hope I can have a midwife attended delivery , maybe...

I'll be posting my birth story soon on the UC bored. 

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Old 09-12-2012, 02:20 PM
 
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Just wanted to follow up.  Our first UC was a wonderful success!!!  I was thinking I might go into labor on a Friday night so around 11pm we took some fun belly pictures.  As soon as I went to bed contractions hit hard and fast.  At 1:15am my husband caught our beautiful baby boy in our kitchen.  I can't really say there was even any pain involved besides a few contractions!  I was at peace and my husband repeatedly goes on about how it was the most incredible moment of his life.  We would definitely do it again!!!

 

OH!!!  Just saw your update aft2010!  Congrats!!!  I'm so glad all went well for you also!

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