*Update: Midwife confirmed yesterday, only one baby of normal size (long, but not big) and fluid levels normal. We discussed, in detail, the fundal heights, and she says a lot of times babies have growth spurts early on, then it levels out. She said if that had happened closer to 36 weeks, she would have been concerned, but since it was so *early* it was nothing to be concerned about.
DH and I were able to discuss his issues, and it really just boiled down he doesn't want to deal with contractions like I had with DD. NOT something going wrong, those were just to "get at me." He brought up other complications from DD's birth (cosmetic tears, 20hr labor, needing pitocin) and I was able to explain to him that those were caused by us going to the hospital for an epidural. The extended labor is a side effect of the epidural, as was the "fever" and needing pitocin... I also explained that the tears were caused by birthing flat on my back, and the doctor ignoring my requests to change position or listen to me when I asked for tissue support. He decided it is a waste of money to continue with the midwife (her fee, our gas to drive to now twice monthly appointments where she really doesn't do anything), only to have her sit in the living room or not be called at all for the birth. He's still sticking with it was rude of us to "use" her for the time we did, that we wasted her time. That I dont understand, but dont see how it is an issue.
For those of you who actually had HELPFUL things to add to this thread, thank you!
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I brought it up again with DH. He wanted a list of valid reasons why not to continue with the midwife. Within an hour, I had typed up a list of 25 of them. At first he accused me of trying to manipulate him (I related birth to sex, and not being able to birth while being watched, so I guess that's manipulating? I didn't intend to...), then moved on to me being controlling, to me being like his idiot patients who call 911, then dont want any medications, and yell at him for not doing anything... Wasn't sure where he was going with that one! Then it proceeded to me stereotyping the midwife, saying she's just like the doctor/hospital staff at DD's birth and on to me "just not liking her." I think we finally got to the bottom of it though... he's got it stuck in his mind, that I'm going to bleed to death, and he'll be left raising newborn twins and a 2.5 year old, and "thanks for thinking of someone other than myself." The conversation kinda ended with me in tears, and he almost in tears. I went to take a nap, and he comes in and asks if I'm going to call her and let her know or if I wanted him to. I told him I thought he made it clear he wasn't willing to do that. And he said that it's obvious I wont be happy with her.
So, we're Ucing?!!?!? I've been measuring "large."
Fundal heights have been:
17wks - 20cm
18 - 22
19 - 24
20 - 25
21 - didn't measure
22 - 28
23 - 29
24 - 30
25 - 30.5
I'm assuming either twins or polyhydranmios. Any experience UCing with either? Any links on info would be appreciated.
I've read some twin birth stories, and it sounds like the second twin usually isn't doing as well as the first... a lot of times the placenta detaches prior to birth? It also sounds like the cord on the first needs clamped and cut to prevent this?
As far as polyhydranmios, people usually chose controlled induction by breaking the waters and allowing the water to slowly drain... I'd prefer not to do this! Any alternatives? I dont want to deal with a cord prolapse...
Any info you have is great! Thanks!
DH and I were able to discuss his issues, and it really just boiled down he doesn't want to deal with contractions like I had with DD. NOT something going wrong, those were just to "get at me." He brought up other complications from DD's birth (cosmetic tears, 20hr labor, needing pitocin) and I was able to explain to him that those were caused by us going to the hospital for an epidural. The extended labor is a side effect of the epidural, as was the "fever" and needing pitocin... I also explained that the tears were caused by birthing flat on my back, and the doctor ignoring my requests to change position or listen to me when I asked for tissue support. He decided it is a waste of money to continue with the midwife (her fee, our gas to drive to now twice monthly appointments where she really doesn't do anything), only to have her sit in the living room or not be called at all for the birth. He's still sticking with it was rude of us to "use" her for the time we did, that we wasted her time. That I dont understand, but dont see how it is an issue.
For those of you who actually had HELPFUL things to add to this thread, thank you!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I brought it up again with DH. He wanted a list of valid reasons why not to continue with the midwife. Within an hour, I had typed up a list of 25 of them. At first he accused me of trying to manipulate him (I related birth to sex, and not being able to birth while being watched, so I guess that's manipulating? I didn't intend to...), then moved on to me being controlling, to me being like his idiot patients who call 911, then dont want any medications, and yell at him for not doing anything... Wasn't sure where he was going with that one! Then it proceeded to me stereotyping the midwife, saying she's just like the doctor/hospital staff at DD's birth and on to me "just not liking her." I think we finally got to the bottom of it though... he's got it stuck in his mind, that I'm going to bleed to death, and he'll be left raising newborn twins and a 2.5 year old, and "thanks for thinking of someone other than myself." The conversation kinda ended with me in tears, and he almost in tears. I went to take a nap, and he comes in and asks if I'm going to call her and let her know or if I wanted him to. I told him I thought he made it clear he wasn't willing to do that. And he said that it's obvious I wont be happy with her.
So, we're Ucing?!!?!? I've been measuring "large."
Fundal heights have been:
17wks - 20cm
18 - 22
19 - 24
20 - 25
21 - didn't measure
22 - 28
23 - 29
24 - 30
25 - 30.5
I'm assuming either twins or polyhydranmios. Any experience UCing with either? Any links on info would be appreciated.
I've read some twin birth stories, and it sounds like the second twin usually isn't doing as well as the first... a lot of times the placenta detaches prior to birth? It also sounds like the cord on the first needs clamped and cut to prevent this?
As far as polyhydranmios, people usually chose controlled induction by breaking the waters and allowing the water to slowly drain... I'd prefer not to do this! Any alternatives? I dont want to deal with a cord prolapse...
Any info you have is great! Thanks!