HELP unnassited birth of 2nd child- - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 14 Old 01-17-2014, 08:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello beautiful strong mothers! I am pregnant with my second child and am choosing no prenatal care and  unnassited home birth. I had previously chosen a birthing center for my first son. At first everything was a dream, very home-like, the midwives were great, but it was not as natural as a process as they claimed it would be. I found myself very tired going every week at the end of pregnancy just for them to say hi then bye... not to mention how much that cost. ON TOP OF THAT, THEY GAVE MY SON THE WRONG SHOT AT BIRTH. THEY GAVE HIM A SHOT THAY WAS MEANT FOR ME. I was in shock and didn't know how to respond. upon speaeking with cdc we were assured my 2 hour old son would survive..they  hoped. GOD BLESS he is alive and healthy. Looking at the rates it is about 3800 for homebirth midwives.... what the heck is that?! I am in awe of this state we are in. I believe as women we should be learning how to birth eachothers children or our own. WHERE IS OUR COMMUNITY FOR WOMEN/MOTHERS?? The only reason they want you to do it in a hospital is so they're pockets swell.  BUT, I DO RESPECT A MOTHERS CHOICE- DO WHAT IS COMFORTABLE/APPROPRIATE FOR YOU AND YOUR CHILD. AND I BELIEVE ONLY THE MOTHER WILL KNOW THAT! SO NO JUDGEMENTS ONLY LOVE!
 I BELIEVE IT IS TIME TO EMPOWER OUR WOMEN AND MOTHERS!  this is a very natural process that has been made to be comfortable in another manner than nature intended. Every women is capable of delivering her child. Just be safe and smart. Listen to your body.  I have had worse pains then laboring pains throughout my teens ( ovarian cysts caused by pearl tampaxx (BAN THESE PRODUCTS) So natural birthing for me seemed like something I knew would empower me and make me stronger and more knowledgeable regarding LIFE. 
LOVE TO ALL THE MOTHERS OUT THERE. AND A BLESSING TO YOU AND YOUR LITTLE ONES.
 I need to know the appropriate things to do as soon as my child is birthed. If their not crying do you suction mouth? how do you cut the cord appropratly ect. PLEASE HELP I am very passionate about this. would be nice to hear from a powerhouse of a women who has done this before.THANK YOU ALL love,mama nature

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#2 of 14 Old 01-22-2014, 07:18 AM
 
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More power to you mama!!!

 

I had 3 hospital births, 2 assisted home births, and 2 unassisted home births, and am pregnant again and planning on yet another unassisted birth.  I have never had to suction any of my babies mouths...in fact my midwife told me there is rarely a reason to and showed me a video that shows the baby expelling fluid from their lungs while being birthed.  As far as the cutting of the cord we always waited until the cord quit pulsating so that baby would get all the blood and nutrients from the placenta...this came about for us because my first child had a low platelet count because they cut the cord immediately after he was born in the hospital and after much research found that it could be prevented if the cord is left intact until all blood is exchanged from the placenta to the baby.

 

We really didn't do much after the birth.  I had a water birth for the last 4 so I just basically hung out in the tub until baby was nursing well and the placenta was expelled.  After the cord was cut my husband weighed and measured the baby, then we all moved to the bed and settled in.  After 6 weeks I would make a visit to my family doctor and get a not from him stating that I had been pregnant and gave birth and then on to the pediatrician for a note from him stating baby's name and birth info so that we could file for a birth certificate. In Louisiana we have to have a statement from a doctor to be able to get a birth certificate and we have 6 months to file before we would have to do DNA testing to prove paternity.

 

I don't do well checks for my children because they always got sick after visiting the doctor's office.  You will know if something is not right with the baby.  My husband teaches CPR and we were both certified as teens.  If something was really off we could head to the local hospital that is minutes away or call for EMTs.  I trust in God and my body to birth my baby and don't need someone telling me I am wrong about what I'm feeling and seeing.  The two doctors we do see as needed trust what I say because I have yet to be wrong...lol!  I even diagnosed my second child with meningitis 2 days before the ER docs did...and I requested that he be tested as soon as I walked into the hospital which they refused to do until I called in my pediatrician's backup.

 

All of this is besides the fact that my last few babies were born less than 5 minutes after labor started and I barely made it to my tub let alone to the hospital and my midwife barely made it to see my 4th child crowning because she lives 30 minutes from where we lived when he was born...now she is an hour away.  I feel more comfortable in my own environment and know where everything is and stay lucid enough to let those around me know where things are and what I need or don't need.

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#3 of 14 Old 01-24-2014, 06:41 PM
 
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Good for you and congratulations!  I've have two girls, both unassisted births (although DH doesn't like that term since he assists, lol).  

 

Suctioning has never been an issue for us, and the research I've done has led me to not believe in routine suctioning and that it is harmful.  There are alternatives in ways of positioning baby and even using your mouth if necessary that are less intrusive.  It's been awhile since I've looked at these, but the research is out there if you look for it...

 

Cord cutting has also never been an issue for us because we don't do it:)  Research delayed cord-cutting as the previous poster mentioned. With both of ours we did no cord cutting and simply allowed the cord to separate from the belly button/placenta itself. Both had belly button's by day 3 or 4.  There are soo many benefits to allowing baby to get the complete transfer from the placenta (it even helps with breathing, which is not something most people think of).  I read somewhere that placentas are sold by hospitals for upwards of $30k!  I'll be compiling my research this go around as we TTC #3 because I hate losing my sources and having to retrace my steps... 

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#4 of 14 Old 01-28-2014, 08:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Temama !!! Thank you for your response!
You soothed my nerves!! It is so wonderful to hear from a mother with a similar mind set. Are any of those babies twins? You are a goddess.... 8 babies? I've always said I wanted 7.  I have one son and am about 8 weeks with number two. I will be surprised at birth with the sex!! So exciting to experience birth in the way I feel it was intended to be experienced.

Good for you!! You are right, who better than the childs mother can determine how the child is feeling/ any ailments... I mean c'mon the child grew inside you for 9 months. The relationship you have will not be understood or felt in the same manner from ANY other person.

bornoutthematrix- We are planning on a lotus birth- which means we will be leaving the cord intact until it falls off on its own.
 

I do a ton of research but have told my self to relax and opt out this time with baby number 2. How can I be doing this as natural as possible yet trying to research and "figure it all out"?  That to me is taking away the power of my body's gift and making myself believe the answers are somewhere else other then myself..  It also adds a lot of stress. So trying to be completely one with mother nature and experience pregnancy and birth like any other animal. So far it has been a TON less stressful in comparison to pregnancy #1 (in which I had to research something everyday, a few times a day and had to know whats going on what could be going on, ect.) ( stress baby doesn't need to feel in there, nor myself)

Thank you both so much for your replies!! beyond appreciated ! xoxo

 

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#5 of 14 Old 01-28-2014, 09:00 AM
 
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I think the disconnect in learning more yet simply trusting and birthing instinctually lies with the way our culture institutionalizes birth. Most of us has never seen someone else give birth, many haven't even had serious talks with other moms about the process, unless it was horror stories, exaggerations, and talk about the godlike power of doctors to save you from it. Read books that normalize it and you will understand more without jarring you from the natural state of mind. Ina May and such. Talk with other moms who have birthed naturally, especially outside the hospital. Learn what traditional midwives do to help when issues arise. If we had a birth culture like that it would seem like a normal milestone instead of a scarey mystery. That's what I love about the birth section of MDC here, it builds that at least in an online presence.

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#6 of 14 Old 01-28-2014, 10:11 AM
 
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If you don't want to pay for a midwife to do all your care you may be able to just do a consultation with one so that they can get you the resources you need for the skills you wish to learn. That would likely be very cheap. 

 

The american red cross or the american heart association usually has CPR classes for newborns. 

 

There are also a lot of clinical guides available online or in used book stores for cheap that can help you tease apart the technical aspects of the skills you want to obtain. 

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#7 of 14 Old 01-29-2014, 05:57 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mamahunny View Post
 

Temama !!! Thank you for your response!
You soothed my nerves!! It is so wonderful to hear from a mother with a similar mind set. Are any of those babies twins? You are a goddess.... 8 babies? I've always said I wanted 7.  I have one son and am about 8 weeks with number two. I will be surprised at birth with the sex!! So exciting to experience birth in the way I feel it was intended to be experienced.

Good for you!! You are right, who better than the childs mother can determine how the child is feeling/ any ailments... I mean c'mon the child grew inside you for 9 months. The relationship you have will not be understood or felt in the same manner from ANY other person.

bornoutthematrix- We are planning on a lotus birth- which means we will be leaving the cord intact until it falls off on its own.
 

I do a ton of research but have told my self to relax and opt out this time with baby number 2. How can I be doing this as natural as possible yet trying to research and "figure it all out"?  That to me is taking away the power of my body's gift and making myself believe the answers are somewhere else other then myself..  It also adds a lot of stress. So trying to be completely one with mother nature and experience pregnancy and birth like any other animal. So far it has been a TON less stressful in comparison to pregnancy #1 (in which I had to research something everyday, a few times a day and had to know whats going on what could be going on, ect.) ( stress baby doesn't need to feel in there, nor myself)

Thank you both so much for your replies!! beyond appreciated ! xoxo

 

Yes, we had lotus births with both of ours as well.  For some reason the term of art escaped me:)

 

It's interesting because I was very similar in that with #1 I did sooooo much research about everything, and that is, I suppose, how I learned so much about birth so I'm not saying it was "bad". But with #2 I barely wanted to even test to confirm pregnancy because I already *knew* and I wanted to more so go with the flow and not think so much about finding things to monitor, research etc.  So I completely get that:)

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#8 of 14 Old 02-05-2014, 07:55 AM
 
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No twins as of yet, though we are suspecting there may be twins this time because I have been showing since week 5 and really showing now at week 8.  I am tiny normally about 95# not pregnant and have gained almost 10 # in the past month. We are thinking about doing lotus birth this time as well...I have been wanting to do it since baby #4 but hubby didn't think he could stomach it....funny how he has made absolutely sure the placenta was intact after the last 4 but didn't think he could deal with it for a few days afterward. I think we should at least give it a go this time. 

 

Ina Mae's books are awesome! Anything that is positive about birth and not all medical were on my reading list but it seems that Ina Mae's are the only one's I kept.

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#9 of 14 Old 02-05-2014, 08:41 AM
 
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I read books from www.birthjunkie.com to help me learn more about birth. The book Heart and Hands by Elizabeth Davis is a good one as well as Naurally HEalthy Pregnancy by Shonda PArker. These books are essentially valuable. The popular Unassisted birth woman named Laura Stanley at www.unassistedchildbirth.com has much to say for inspiration.

Depending on your spirituality (Christian or not) some books you may find information that is meat and other information just bones. Take the bones and make soup.......

I have old information on my www.raggedycottagegarden.blogspot.com blog about what I did for my unassisted home-births......

Keeping records like fetal heart tones, http://spinningbabies.com/ and such, is a good idea to proove that yes unassisted homebirth women do know their math and numbers and are capable of thinking like a normal human being. Many outside of unassited homebirth do not believe this and deceive themselves about the nature of unassisted homebirth women. Some women who even claim to use midwives and homebirth also may accuse unassisted homebirth women of being "nuts." I wouldn't let that get under one's skin.

I believe if you can count to 10 on your hands, the number of fingers on your newborn's hand's and toes, they shouldn't have anything beneficial to say.
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#10 of 14 Old 02-05-2014, 08:55 AM
 
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PS. Probably the most "Simple" book to have on hand is Emergency Childbirth......its a book for EMT's

Basically in childbirth make sure you are not anemic (take floradix iron plus herbs), Then in a normal birth let gravity and Uterus do the work. Relax during labor by keep mind on other things.

Water break first, then baby. Catch baby like football. If you do lotus birth so long as no cord problems do not pull on cord ever while placenta is still attached. This causes heavy bleeding. Leave it alone. When you allow baby to nurse the placenta should come on its own and let gravity do the work.
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#11 of 14 Old 02-06-2014, 11:55 AM
 
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Here it is -"Emergency Childbirth" by Gregory White online for free! I am going to try to reformat and repost.

 

http://www.theperfectbirth.com/gregorywhite.pdf

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#12 of 14 Old 02-09-2014, 07:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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 temama-Congrats!!!  would love to hear in the future if you are feeling kicks from multiples... how amazing.  Twins are WORK as is any singleton as well... my aunt has twin girls and I am hoping im the next in the family ! But I will be exuberant with whatever life gives us!
oh my thank you so much to all- I was NOT expecting this much love, you all are awesome!! xoxox stary strong mamas
 

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#13 of 14 Old 02-17-2014, 04:18 PM
 
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My son wasn't crying or even breathing when he came out. It took him 3 minutes before he coughed and then started shallow breaths. I never got scared. I knew he would be fine. The placenta was giving him everything he needed. When he coughed he was very goopy (technical term, lol) so I sucked his nose and then his mouth with mine. Just once and spit the goo out into the tub. We kept the placenta connected for about an hour. Good luck momma! It's so worth it to do birth the way it was intended!
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#14 of 14 Old 06-05-2014, 11:59 AM
 
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my first was hospital birth (hated the experience)
second was birth center... it was great but 6 hours away.... not fun laboring in car
3-5 were uc and was pleased with my experiences

there are tons of info out there that I suggest you look into... as the say knowledge is power. But to address your questions- babies don't have to cry after birth... actually my uc births didn't.... it is more peaceful than hospital. During the birthing process most of the gunk is gotten out of airways so suctioning is not needed much... but I always have one available just in case.
As for cord... about an inch from babies belly tie off cord (I use embroidery thread that is braided to be thinker). tie it tightly ...some people tie off both sides of the cord coming from baby and placenta, but I don't see the need. Cut cord..... the thread doesn't stay tight once cut so I replace with a tiny rubber band on the stump. To prevent possible infection, I suggest having the scissors and cord tie off sterilized before hand (rubbing alcohol works fine... let dry and store in baggy)
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