First of all, congrats Kate!!! And Welcome, Finn!!!
We're still waiting.... I've decided that this babe won't be born until March, and that's okay with me. Ctx have pretty much quit, and I'm just not feeling that desparate "done" feeling yet.
Very glad we decided to go UC - the OB I interviewed put my due date at Feb 13 (I flat out refused that), and the midwife I saw briefly agreed to leave it somewhere between the 15th and 20th. So either way, I'd be "overdue", which I don't agree with. I KNEW there was a reason I pushed so hard early on to have my "due date" be later.... I must have known this babe would be a slow-cooker, lol!
So this waiting is just confirming my faith in my body's knowledge (over the medical model).... baby's still moving around - not much room for kicking anymore, lol - and I feel good!
Jennie - DH is military, too, and after we decided to go UC, I went to the clinic on-base for something non-pregnancy-related. The nurse practitioner and I were chatting (she knew I wanted a home birth, as I had asked her earlier if she knew of any midwives who would fly in for one in our area). Anyway, she asked if we had decided what to do about the birth yet.... I sort of hedged around (I don't want to lie about our UC plans, but didn't want to announce it to a medical person, yk?) but when she figured it out and asked me straight out if we were "doing it ourselves", I said yes. We talked a bit about it and she didn't seem freaked out - I left feeling okay, wishing she hadn't asked flat out, but feeling like she understood why and respected my choice.
Anyway, the next time I was into the clinic, the nurse practitioner gave us a "heads up" that she had told the supervising doc about our plans and that the doc was very upset and was planning to call DH's command and make sure we didn't UC. Which, after DH and I talked about it, I said "screw 'em - if they want to come drag a laboring woman into the hospital, good luck". *I* didn't enlist in the military, they have no right to tell me what to do with my body, yk? Plus, we weren't really too concerned about the doc actually making the call b/c it had already been a couple of months since she had threatened to, and DH hadn't heard a word about it from his command. So we figured either she didn't ever call, or she did and the command ignored her (which is possible - she's a crazy person, and DH's command HATES her guts). Either way, nothing has been said to DH....
As soon as I have this baby, I will be filing a formal complaint about the nurse practitioner telling the doc - I was not at the clinic for pre-natal care, I have never asked them to provide pre-natal care, we were making chit-chat that has now been entered into my medical record. How PO'd am I?? That's pretty much like her asking me what color my underwear was that day and then telling the doc.... we were not discussing my pregnancy or the birth in the form of a care provider/patient relationship. Grrrr.......
So from now on, we will be seeing a civilian family practitioner for ANY reason. Which I will also be including in my complaint when I file it.
Anyway, just wanted to let you know that I was in a similar situation, and I honestly don't know what would have happened had DH's command pushed it. I do feel that it's my body, my baby, my birth, and therefore none of the command's business, but I understand that they could probably make things miserable for DH if they chose to do so. WHY do people think that birth is public domain?!?!!
And good for you if you manage to refrain from snarking at your DH, lol. I would be uber-pissed, particularly about the huge bill. Can you talk to the midwives about it? I understand that they need to be paid for their work, but like you said, this is something that should have been addressed MUCH earlier in the pregnancy. MUCH earlier. Good luck.
I've just been lurking around here lately, but my mind is pretty scattered so I don't reply too much (I forget people and sometimes forget what I was going to say, lol!). I sure hope I regain some brain function after the baby gets here!