UC support thread #15 March 05 - Page 4 - Mothering Forums
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#91 of 116 Old 03-25-2005, 12:37 PM
 
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huh, my sig disappeared....weird

and now its back, MDC is messin with me lol
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#92 of 116 Old 03-25-2005, 12:49 PM
 
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Annakiss, thanks for your diligence in protecting this space. Not all such questions are friendly and sincere. (In fact they usually aren't...)

UmmSamiyah, welcome to the UC forum!

"Why would you ladies choose to have UC instead of at least a midwife? I had a midwife and thought she was great not interferring or anything."

It looks (from a later post) that you are rethinking that, but if you weren't I'd say great for you! Midwives fill a need for many women.

For me, it started with my first birth, in which I found out that the midwife who was so wonderful in prenatals was actually a terrible fit for me during the birth itself. I felt very violated by her actions, not a way you want to feel in what is supposed to be one of the most beautiful and sacred days of your life. For my second birth I was much more careful in my choice of birth attendant, and it was a very empowering experience. Even so, the experience was lacking. The presence of the midwife in itself was instrusive and inhibiting.

After that birth I began to learn about the hormonal process of birth, and how it is compromised by anything which stimulates the neocortex (which midwives often unwittingly do) and by inhibition. It turns out that birth is a lot like sex in that sense. I didn't want anything to interfere with the normal process and thereby make complications more likely. I don't mean just physical complications. Emotional ones too.

"... What about vacc's or birth certificates or logistics like that? Are most of you women homeschooling?

If you vaccinate, just take your baby to your pediatrician as you would usually. It's not like you need a referral from an OB or midwife, right? If you're concerned about the birth certificate, I'd just call your state's vital statistics office and inquire as to what would happen if a birth was not attended by a medical professional. They probably will require some sort of prove of pregnancy, or an affidavit from someone swearing that the baby is yours. Our state requires two affidavits, but no proof of pregnancy.

And no, our children don't go to school. It does seem that people who start questioning conventional beliefs about one thing in their lives tend to do so about others as well.

"Tell me about prenatal care then? How does that work out?"

I'm generally pretty healthy, so didn't have to do too much monitoring of my health. Just took care of myself and was aware of how I was feeling. The exception was taking my blood pressure a couple of times when I felt certain things were "off". I did use a fetoscope to become familiarized with the baby's heartbeat and position, and I had a midwife friend palpate my belly, just for a second opinion. But really, you can do just about as much monitoring as you like, short of doing your own ultrasound.
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#93 of 116 Old 03-25-2005, 01:05 PM
 
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I love this group. I am learning so much here and getting such great support. It's funny because someone asked me whether there is a lot of support for UC where I live, and I don't know ANYONE locally who believes in or does UC. I have heard of one woman who believes in UC, spoke to another a couple of years ago casually (don't even know her name), and have a friend whose husband was birthed by UC.

But this group is made up of such strong, intelligent women and it is thoroughly empowering. It is just a shame that we are given such grief by others who don't know or understand the issues.

KateSt thanks for sharing that you understood where I was coming from. So many people don't. I posted my nightmare story on the "I'm pregnant" thread about how my u/s. The closer I got to the procedure, the more I knew I didn't want it, but the mw thought I was carrying twins and I would have to change midwives, so I NEEDED the darned information. A bunch of people are like "what is wrong with you? Sono's are exciting. " Yeah, well some of us don't want or need someone else telling us how we are doing or trying to "facilitate" our bonding with our children. Personally I don't get women who are incapable of bonding with a baby inside one's body without an u/s.

UmmSammiyah, don't feel bad about not knowing how to tell your family. I sound like this great, strong woman who has it all together. But I can be a real coward. My 1st son is 17 yo and my family still doesn't know he had a homebirth with a mw. They are very uptight, upper middle class and already think I'm totally nuts. I wouldn't even consider telling them that I am doing UC. In fact, I have only told 2 people where I live that I am doing a UC. Everybody else thinks I'm "looking for" another mw.

Klothos I loved your post on why you are freebirthing. I, too, hate people touching me. I am so private that until the past month I didn't have any furniture in my living room in order to discourage people to visit (no kidding). My son and I used camping chairs and we have lots of throw pillows for sitting on the floor. And I rarely invited people over unless there was good reason. In fact, my son and I usually won't answer the doorbell unless we are expecting someone.

And while UC/freebirthing doesn't necessarily imply any other differences from other people, it does take a person who will question authority in major ways and come to her own conclusions.

Personally, I am a homeschooling, vegan mother. I vaxed my son because I didn't think I could successfully get out of it where I was living. This time, there is no way it will happen. At least not with the vaxes containing thimerosol. It helps to UC and homeschool because then you aren't at the forefront of the medical establishment's attention too.
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#94 of 116 Old 03-29-2005, 01:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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hello wonderful ladies
Dh and I decided to have an ultrasound this time around for some good peace of mind. We really wanted to get the heart checked out so we could just move on from our fears. Our sweet daughter who was stillborn had a bad heart. The ultrasound was today and everything was wonderful. As you can tell from my sig we also know who we are expecting........even if we didn't want to know, I saw right away that I have a son. That is what I thought immediately when I heard the heartbeat. I feel like it is a new pregnancy now and can move on from the fear.
I am almost at the halfway point and the days are going by both slow and fast. I can't wait for labor and the moment I meet my son face to face. I wonder how long labor will be. I have had 8hr, 4hr, and 2 hr, in that order. Wonder if this son will change everything up or finish off the pattern.
I will continue to see my mw for emotional support when I need it, but the labor and birth will be all ours.
Peace and love,
Brandi

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#95 of 116 Old 03-29-2005, 01:27 PM
 
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That's such wonderful news Brandi! I am so happy to hear everything looks well! and a boy!?!?! woohoo!!!!!!!

Blissful Mama to DD-(5), DS-(6) and someone new due in November!
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#96 of 116 Old 03-29-2005, 10:35 PM
 
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Hello. I'm new to this board/thread. Didn't even realize there was one here, though I guess I should have.

I'm planning a UBAC. My baby will probably arrive in early August. I wanted an unassisted with my ds, but dh was too scared (1 1/2 hours from the nearest hospital) and I was easily swayed, since I didn't know as much then. I wound up with a completely unnecessary cesarean for my trouble (water broke, baby & I weren't ready to labour, failed induction, stupid 24 hour rule). It took me over a year to stop feeling pain on a daily basis from it.

When I finally was able to face the thought of risking another birth, I knew there was no way I was going back in a hospital. A midwife isn't an option, for various reasons, even though I'm training to become one, and I really believe that we'll be safer/better off on our own. Dh is mostly on-board with the idea, though completely terrified. He doesn't want me to have to go through what I went through with ds. I think he's hoping I'll stop being so obsessed with birth once I have a good one.

I got a fetoscope a couple of weeks ago and can hear the baby's heartbeat everytime I try now. It's so cool! I debated for a very long time, but decided to have an ultrasound. I'm pretty sure the placenta is nowhere near my scar, but I really need the reassurance and I think it will help dh as well. I haven't decided what I'm going to do if it's over it. Really, I don't think it will be a problem, since I had a diagnostic ultrasound (due to multiple miscarriages) just before I got pregnant this time and she couldn't even see it. Deciding whether or not to have an ultrasound was one of the hardest things I've ever done, and I'm still going back and forth a bit about it. I probably will be wondering if I'm doing the right thing even after it's over tomorrow.

Not sure what else to say. Gotta go help dh with supper and then I'm going to read some of the other threads in this forum.

mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#97 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 02:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Deciding whether or not to have an ultrasound was one of the hardest things I've ever done, and I'm still going back and forth a bit about it
Right there with you!!! It was a very difficult thing for me to commit to doing.
I am after the fact now and am happy that I did it. Still knowing that an ultrasound would not have changed the outcome of my daughter who was stillborn at 40 weeks, I opted to get one this time for a few reasons. One thing it did for me was it allowed me to let go of the fears that had built up after losing my daughter. Fear really messes with your rational and instinctual thinking. Ultrasound is often an unnecessary intervention, but it does have a place. We all try and do what is best for our own individual situations. I believe that is the true unassisted attitude. To not follow any ones plan except for your own that you believe is best and safest for you and your baby, and knowing that things are always subject to change.

Oh yeah--Welcome to the list

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#98 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 04:01 PM
 
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Yay, brandi! a little boy!
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#99 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 04:42 PM
 
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I haven't been on in awhile, the one-handed typing thing isn't very easy! It's great to see all the new babies being born and the ones still yet to come ... I imagine SprinklePocket is in or very close to babymoon!
I have also still been trying to sort out this last birth experience, the biggest difficulty is in getting over the embarassment and the let-down I feel in myself. How could I, someone who knows why uc is important, who has read a ton of things about natural childbirth, have a baby in the hospital? if there had been something wrong than i would feel okay, but there was no medical reason. i wish i'd had the courage to leave the mw's, i wish i had not invited my parents to stay, i wish i had run away ... faenin was born 2 minutes after midnight, at exactly 42 weeks (according to an estimated due date!) and the "rules" say that at 42 weeks the mw's must transfer care to an ob. my parents were with us and i was not up to negotiating lying to the mw's or having my baby alone, with my father. i told the mw that at the beginning of my pregnancy that i intuited the baby coming feb 8 (which he did) and that if he did not, i would go into hospital to induce. they wouldn't go for it. i got a stretch and sweep first thing on the monday and had light, "menstrual" cramping throughout the day, by evening i had to go in for more inducing. i was 4cm dialated and the ob gave me protaglandin gel. in 15 minutes i was in full labor. i felt like vomiting, i was out of control and wanted to get it over with. i was "let" up to go to the washroom and i regained some control. it was so overwhelming to go from zero to full so quickly. i had to stay tied down to monitors for 2 hours, it was terrible. thankfully i am very good at relaxing and focusing and was able to make it through. when i was let up to go to a birthing room, i peed everywhere (ha!ha! a fine mess for the nurse!). i was told i had to be monitored for another 30 minutes and then i would be free to move. i told them before this that the baby was coming soon. the nurse said i was only at 5 cm but i knew i was in transition. the doctor went back to bed, one of the mw left, they sent my dad and older child home. when i went into the room, my mother laid down and 5 minutes later i had the incredible urge to push. i yelled that she had to get my older child back. no one believed me, too busy looking at the monitors. anyway, faenin was born about 10 minutes later, and i got another episiotomy (why???). i wasn 't allowed to squat, nobody massaged me (mw not allowed at this point), bright lights, cord clamped, all the crap i didn't want. the good thing is that baby was perfectly healthy and bf right away with no problems. i was so frustrated and felt so unlike myself. i don't even feel like i gave birth, only 2 1/2 hours. i feel like it was taken away, again! i even did ultrasounds for them so they could see that he was okay and he was perfect! this was so unempowering, i felt so out of control.
okay, done the venting for now ...
it could have been worse, right? i realized that it was not so unlike my relationship to the father. how could i have a peaceful, powerful birth when this man left my life in such chaos?
i think the most important thing i learned, in retrospect, and thank in part to KateSt, is the power of visualization. i knew i wanted to birth alone, i did feel it every night while i bathed and listened to the cd's i had made specially. i had prepared my older child wonderfully (he was so heartbroken to have missed it ). because i could never count on the "dad" i could never really fully focus on what it would look like. my "daydreams" about it were changing. i could not picture who would be there. i think a supportive partner is so very important, even if you do not want them there, knowing you are supported if you need to be,even as a "goper".
i knew as soon as this child was born that there was to be another, seriously, before the placenta even came out! i will not make the same mistakes. i will run away! i would love to have a baby in the ocean. i will not tell the "sperm donor" (because sometimes, that is all the men are) and i will have peace within myself. i waited to long for this man to come around, to care enough for the process, that i lost my womun power.
Visualization, and peace, are the keys to a magikal birth. Thank you for showing me this KateSt.
This is terribly rambling and incoherent but i had it in me to get it out today!
I hate that it says hospital birth beside my name in this thread. i hate that i have to tell people i didn't have a home birth, it doesn't sound right.
why do we have to get over the trauma that birth, medicalized birth, brings? it isn't supposed to be this way ...
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#100 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 07:15 PM
 
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Mama2Lennon:

I have to go make dinner But I wanted to respond with a for now. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and come back here tonight. I'm glad you got it out and shared this with us.
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#101 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 08:43 PM
 
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hello everybody,

this is sprinkle pocket's hubby chiming in for her.

she wanted everybody to know that we had a baby boy last wednesday, the 23rd!! his name is gusset bodhi rezek b--- and he's amazing! everything went great and they are both healthy and doing wonderful. our babymoon has now been a week and it will probably go another. she's putting together a birth story that she'll (or i'll) put up at some point.

speaking for myself, i want everybody to know how much the support means to sp and me as well.

we'll post an update soon . . .

Waldorf homeschooling homesteading homebirthing mama to my 2 boys '05 & '10 joy.gif & most amazing wife to my most amazing dh
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#102 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 09:28 PM
 
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Mama2Lennon -

Congrats, sprinkle pocket and hubby! Happy Babymoon!

Devaskyla -

ChildoftheMoon - Congrats on the healthy boy!
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#103 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 10:17 PM
 
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Mama2Lennon -- I've been thinking of you and wondering about you since your last post. I'm SO sorry you had such a traumatic birth experience. I had tears in my eyes reading your post. What an intuitive mama you are, though, and so very strong. I'm very honored that something I said helped you a bit -- I only wish there was more I could do for you. I hope you feel a bit better after getting out your story and I do hope you continue posting. I've missed you and still believe that you belong here as much as any mama. Love and healing vibes to you.

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#104 of 116 Old 03-30-2005, 10:21 PM
 
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Sprinkle Pocket and Hubby -- Congratulations on your new baby boy! I'm so happy everything went well. I can't wait to read the birth story (and maybe it will inspire me to finish mine!) Thanks for updating us, SP's Hubby!

Brandi -- So glad to hear you had a wonderful u/s and that it's given you peace of mind. I'm so, so happy to hear it! And congrats on your baby boy. How do you feel about having a son?

Welcome, Devaskyla! I LOVE seeing new uc mamas on this thread!

So, I was thinking of starting a "UC Mamas" thread to talk about our babies and children. I know there's "Life With a Babe" and other threads in the Parenting Forum. But I've had a lot of questions and would really like to talk about them amongst you wonderful like-minded mamas. It would be a place where we could hang out after the birth of our babies and share our experiences. I'd love to hear more from experienced uc mamas like Mamajaza, Indigolilybear, and Blueviolet. Would anyone be interested in this?

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#105 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 10:11 AM
 
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It seems as though many of you are having your babies now. It is wonderful to hear from you.

Mama2Lennon, I am sorry about your experience. I hope you are feeling better about everything.

Good luck to everybody else waiting, waiting for that special moment to happen.

I have to laugh–I'm not due until the 1st week of July, but for the 1st time last night a couple of people said to me "It's not going to be long now, is it?" No doubt by the time I'm due I'll want to be violent with those people, but at this point I can still laugh. And they're right–even my doula has told me that I am larger than other friends and clients who are due in the next couple of weeks.

And I think the idea of having a UC Mamas thread/list is fantastic. Go for it. I can't wait until I can post on there myself!
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#106 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 10:37 AM
 
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Felt compelled to come back and give Sprinkle Pocket, Gusset, and Hubby a party. I thought about you all night.

Welcome, welcome to the world Baby Boy!
: : :
Congratulations again!!! Love to your family!

Cresorchid -- don't you just love comments about how big you are? My sensitive brother told me I was the "biggest pregnant woman he's ever seen," on the same day my SIL told me I was the smallest. Go figure. I wish people would just keep their opinions to themselves!!

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#107 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 10:38 AM
 
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Okay, it looks like I'm manic from all my posts. But I'm wondering about Jenniebug! Perhaps she's babymooning herself!

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#108 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 01:09 PM
 
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KateSt. I think I read somewhere that Jenniebug had a baby boy?

Congratulations to Sprinklepocket and Sprinkpocket's Dh! : Glad you are both having a wonderful babymoon - take your time with the story event hough I can't wait to read it

Hmm perhaps I should get going on my own birthstory before I forget everything that happened :LOL RIght now all I can think is well, labor was 5 hrs (the intense part anyways), my water never broke/leaked, Dh caught his dd and got soaking wet because she was born in the caul and her sac broke all over him after she arrived..teehee!

Mama2Lennon
I sympathise with you feeling like maybe you "don't belong" here anymore. I felt the same way when having joined a UC list while pregnant with my second, only to come back to say well not only did I have the baby in the hospital I was scared/forced into an induction and I even had drugs : I was embarrased! Fortunately the list-sisters were supportive and congratulatory and waited until I was ready to talk about my devastating feelings over the birth and the details, etc. They were refreshingly honest but I needed time before I could deal with 'refreshingly honest'.

After a while I was glad I stayed involved while processing what I had been through with not just my second but continued to process my first as well.

Anyways, so much of your birthstory mirrors Donovan's birthstory (you dont' have to read, it's sooo long lol, just for others to put my post in some context if they wish)

Quote:
it could have been worse, right? i
If worse than what you went through pertains to the baby having trouble breathing or having a c/s...you dont' have to rate your birth on the HOrrible Birth Experience scale...it was your birth, and you don't feel like you were hardly there, and it was traumatic, and yo have some healing work to go through. That's what matters.

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i knew as soon as this child was born that there was to be another, seriously, before the placenta even came out! i will not make the same mistakes. i will run away! i would love to have a baby in the ocean
:LOL That's how I felt right after pushing Donovan out and I was clutching him to me. I was on that birth high (despite all of the crap) and turned to my anti-homebirth/UC mother and said cheerfully "I could have done this at home!" As the sadness and misery took over (exacerbated by the fact they held my baby hostage at 4 hrs postpartum for the rest of the night) and reality sinking in...I remember finally getting to walk out of that hospital with my baby boy and older son and swore on my life that never again would I step foot in a hospital again for pregnancy or birth. I cried the whole way home.
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why do we have to get over the trauma that birth, medicalized birth, brings? it isn't supposed to be this way ...
It sucks, it's downright that modern medicalized birth causes trauma, that in the long run is our best interest to "get over". Truthfully, I'll never be "over it" regarding my first two boys' births. It was my experiences, I own them and the anger that arises from thinking about it at times, it's a part of my birth journey as a whole, it's a part of my drive and motivation to UC...I no longer feel the the most severe emotional effects, but I'll never forget it either. Otherwise I may well have gone through all that hell in vain and to completely get over it and be all hippie-dippie about it does a disservice to myself.

Perhaps we can just erase the 'hospital' next to your name on the roll call and leave it at the birthdate, if it is making you feel like the fact you had a hospital birth is somehow being 'rubbed in'. You belong here just as much as anyone.
Wishing you well and much healing mama.
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#109 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 02:06 PM
 
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Kate I was babymooning And somewhat avoiding this forum Trying to come to terms with the afterbirth experience.

I had an awesome labor and waterbirth, despite having V here but after the babe as born I felt so attacked, intruded upon and violated. I'll write out the birth story and try to get the after birth horror in as well.

Saturday March 26 8 am I woke up to a dull back ache and a contraction. It felt a little different due to the back ache but I wasn't convinced it was anything more than more prodromal, after all it wasn't the 3rd quarter moon cycle lol as the morning wore on the back ache became very annoying, so much so I pulled out my last thermacare heatwrap.

11:30am I decided to call the mw and let her know what was up. I was thinking that by calling her for sure the ctrx would stop. But they continued on, very sporatically.

Decided to go for a walk with my friend who lives a few houses down. Didn't seem to do much but make my pelvis hurt so I came home and took a nap. I got about an hours worth before I was woken by a contraction. My 4yo & 2yo came to snuggle with me and suddenly i had 4-5 ctrx each 1 min apart. I was thinking "whoa this is going to go fast!" so I crawled out of bed only to have the ctrx space way out again.

4pm I decide we need to clean and put everyone to a task. I however sat myself on my birth ball & bounced. 4:30 I decide to call my friend M who really wants to see what a homebirth is like. She tells me she will be about an hour so I head back to my friend P's house for another walk around the neighborhood.

5:30 M catches up with us on our walk and has me walk a bit faster. Ctrx were still so very sporadic that I was beginning to think they would never level out into a pattern.

6pm I decide to walk a bit in the house as my ctrx are becoming a bit more intense but still sporatic. Then I got into my birth pool. Ahhhhhhhh it was so nice & warm, very relaxing but it made my ctrx slow down initially.

7pm my ctrx suddenly went from jumping all over the place to being 2 min aprt! I was so glad they finally got down to business and I knew at 2 min apart it wouldn't be long before she was born. We waited a few more ctrx before calling the mw. I wish I had waited a bit longer but hindsight is 20/20 as they say.

8:30 or so the student mw arrives followed by V and the asst mw whom I had never met before. The house was crowded but the 3 mw's pretty much kept to themself and away from me. In between ctrx I was laughing and cracking jokes, not even realizing I was entering into transition.

9pm the ctrx became very intense and I needed dh to apply counterpressure to my back. It felt so good having him do that. In between these ctrx I was feeling very nauseous. The student mw slipped behind me very quietlt and helped keep cool rags on my forehead & neck. I really was thankful for that as it helped cool me down and ease my nauseousness. I know during the last 2 hours I was in the bathroom rather frequently but this one a little after 9 brought on some bloody show and slight loss of plug.

9:15 or so I had to make yet another pee break from all the fluids I was drinking. I hated having to get out of the tub and sit on the toilet but it was better than peeing on myself! While on the toilet this last time the rest of my plug came out and *pop* my water broke. I came out of the bathroom with this big grin and told dh "well my plug is gone & my water broke!" So we started to walk back down the hallway so I could get in the tub. I barely made it 3 steps from my bedroom when I was seized by a mighty contraction. DH asked if I wanted to go back to the bedroom and get in bed or get back to the birth pool to deliver. During the contraction I stated simply that the baby was going to pick her own birth place. I felt her moving down and I am sure she was beginning to crown. Finally after the contraction passed I made my way back to the pool as quikly as I could. I wanted my waterbirth!

9:23pm I get into the tub and go to sit when I realize the baby is coming out right now! I am on my knees and trying to breathe thru the urge to push as I want her to deliver slowly as to avoid any tears. Baby on the other hand had different ideas and came shooting out of me like a bat out of hell! I barely had time to catch her as dh also reached down to give me a hand.

9:24pm Baby is here! I lay back in the tub as V unwraps the cord from her neck (this ticked me off as I was perfectly capable of performing that myself). I noticed she also had the cord around her body so I finished unwinding her.

Two of my boys starting yelling out, its a boy its a boy!! I just laughed at them and said Its not a boy you silly kids, its a girl! Sure neough she was After a few moments the mw's started pressuring me to get out of the tub or the baby would get cold I wasn't ready to get out but I started to and they told me I neded to deliver the placenta quikly. I was in no rush to deliver the placenta nor cut the cord but they became ver yinistent we cut it and get me out. I finally gave in after asking the baby if it was ok to cut her cord. Soon after I pushed the placenta out and felt it burn a little. I knew I had torn.

I get out of the tub and dry off to make my way back to my bed. This is where things get real hazy for me and where it seems everything really started to fall aprt. I was already irritated by how fast they wanted me out of the tub, cut the cord and deliver the placenta but coming back to the bedroom was horrible! I suddenly had people spreading my yoni trying to wipe away the blood and check for tears (I already knew I had a tear and planned to do as i would in a uc, keep my legs together and let it heal naturally) and during this time they are pressing on my uterus, taking my temp and blood pressure, you know all the "standard of care" crap. The asst mw wanted me to get babe to breast right away but I could tell she wasn't ready yet. The mw grabbed my breast and tried shoving it into the babys mouth all while I am being bombarded with other activites and questions such as what is the babys name. Like anyone would have time to come up with a name with all the crap they are doing! I told them several times we didn't have a name chosen yet and we needed to talk about but we were never given the space to do just that. The asst kept trying to force me to nurse and pressuring me into letting her show me some other positions to put baby in. I was getting furious, I know how to nurse, this is my 4th child! ARG!

Finally after what seemed like an hour long attack they left me alone and I was able to give baby over to dh while I went and showered. No sooner than I was out of the shower when they attacked again. This time it was to get babes vitals. Yeah all that stuff they said could be done while on my chest was done at the foot of the bed away from me. Baby just screamed her head off, not that I can blame her its exactly what I anted to do. DH wanted to grab them all and toss them out on their rears. He was really regretting having them there. He told me later he wanted to kick them out as soon as the baby was born, after all the "dangerous" part was over and he only needed them to be there for the "just in case" to avoid issues with his command.

I was never so relived when they all finally left. I don't think I felt that violated when i gave birth in the hospital. While I am thankful for having the labor and birth I wanted, as close to UC as one can possibly get with a mw in the house, the afterbirth was traumatic.

I have been very surprised by the long recovery period with this one. After my first UC I was up immediatley doing laundry and posting online, even out shopping the following day. This time however I was pretty weak and sore the first day after so I tried to spend much of it in bed, altho I did get up for an hour or so. Monday I decided I needed to do something around the house even tho i still felt weak. 30 min at the computer was enough to send me back to bed feeling lightheaded. But I ignored that and did some laundry. Well when I went to the bathrom after that I passed a huge clot that made me feel even worse. I put myself on strict bedrest after that. I still couldn't sit up for more than a few minutes n Tues. Wed was still weak but getting stronger. I could tell my iron was low and I needed to get it boosted quikly.

I did osmething I thought I would never do yesterday. But as they say drastic times call for drastic measures. I sent dh out for a blender and V-8 juice. While he was shopping I cut up about 1/4 of my placenta. I put the placenta, V-8, some chopped carrot and fresh lemon juice into the blender and sent it spinning. It took me about 15 minutes of staring at this "smoothie" to finally drink it. I felt almost instantly better but knew to keep myself in bed despite feeling better. This morning I woke up so refreshed and full of energy! Its truly amazing the healing powers of ones placenta. I am amazed at myself for being able to do what I did but I have to say i do hope I ever need to do it again :LOL

So here I am day 5 after the birth of my daughter. We have named her Rhiannon Elizabeth Sage C---. She was 7lbs 6oz and 19 1/4 in long. For such a tiny thing she sure did give me a few rug burns coming out. She is an awesome sleeper and excellent nurser. I however am dealin gwith the overactive letdown issue. Poor Rhi keeps getting drowned in my milk and has become the spit up queen. Hopefully my milk will settle down to a normal rate soon before we all end up drowned in breastmilk!

Well I have been up out of bed for 4 hours now, my bum is sore and I am getting tired so I had better get myself some lunch and head back to bed for the rest of the day.

I plan to let the mw know how I felt over all the activity that took place after Rhi was born. I think they need to know they are overly aggressive, overly intrusive and need to learn to back off more. I will get thru this part of the birth but it has certainly taught dh and I that UC really is the best and only way. Ok well I already knew that but now DH truly 110% knows and believes it. IF we ever have another I know it will be UP/UC all the way. I can definetly see now too how even having a mw homebirth can still send a mama running to a UC.
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#110 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 02:09 PM
 
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wow that was really long! and t othink i am sure i left out details :LOL
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#111 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 03:13 PM
 
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one-handed typing, so forgive me.

WELCOME LITTLE RHI!! : :
Jennie, I don't even know what to say about the mw's behavior afterwards. I do agree that you should voice how you feel to them. It's too bad S wasn't there, I wonder if it would have been different. I'm so happy the actual birth was wonderful. i'm just sorry you have to reconcile what happened after.
Love to you and your little Rhi.

I'd love to write more, but Finn is waking.

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#112 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 05:38 PM
 
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thank you for all the support - i wish we all lived in same city, not just this cyber-world! then we could have real, tangible, physical support and perhaps not feel so alone in this crazy world ...

I forgot something - afterwards, the ob taught his midwife student how to stitch up the episiotomy, that was the most painful part! she was terrible - touching me all over the sensitive areas on my and oris. i was bracing myself and i couldn't hold my baby i was jumping so much. i really didn't appreciate being a teaching tool.

to everyone!
we all have our own road to healing, may we all be blessed!
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#113 of 116 Old 03-31-2005, 05:53 PM
 
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nak

Kate--I was just talking to a friend who delivered a few weeks before me. S was the main mw & V the back up. She said her afterbirth care was even worse than mine V gave her a shot of pitocin without consent and for no reason. S strongly encouraged her into receiving one stitch on a cosmetic tear she got during the delivery. V did to her (regarding forcing babe to breast) what the asst mw did to me. Her pelvic bones alsp slit from the position they had her in for so long to apply that one stitch *sigh*

I'm now very nervous about having them insert my IUD as well as worried about my friend who is HBAC-ing with them in around 10 weeks.
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#114 of 116 Old 04-01-2005, 12:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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April Thread

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mom to dd-99, dd-01, dd-born still@40w 7/04, ds-05, dd-08, dd-10, dd-13

love and light

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#115 of 116 Old 04-02-2005, 02:12 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KateSt.
So, I was thinking of starting a "UC Mamas" thread to talk about our babies and children. I know there's "Life With a Babe" and other threads in the Parenting Forum. But I've had a lot of questions and would really like to talk about them amongst you wonderful like-minded mamas. It would be a place where we could hang out after the birth of our babies and share our experiences. I'd love to hear more from experienced uc mamas like Mamajaza, Indigolilybear, and Blueviolet. Would anyone be interested in this?

I think that would be awesome! And I've thought of that before too. Great minds think alike, hey I thought we could talk about how "special" our UC babies are, and maybe post a few pictures. I have this great picture of Samaya with a hat that says "born to be Free"

mama2lennon~s I understand how things went for you. It must have been SO hard having to deal with a breakup at the same time that you were preparing for your baby's birth I hope that you do get the birth of your dreams one days

Sprinkle pocket~ your lovely user name has been popping into my head recently, and I remembered that you were due .. and he's here already. WOW! I hope that I have a boy one day too CONGRATS!!! I look forward to reading your birth story.

Jenniebug~ congrats! I love that name that you chose for your little grrl. Sorry that you had a bad experience with the "med-wives".s
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#116 of 116 Old 04-05-2005, 02:00 PM
 
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Kinsey-- CONGRATS on the birth of CallieAnne!!!
I have been watching & waiting & checking my PMs to see if ou had that baby yet, (and if it was a boy or a girl) And I FINALLY found a post of yours from the 13th saying shes here & that there was a problem though... : I feel horrible for hounding your PM box for details, now that I know this. Im sorry. I REALLY hope you are both doing well! Congratulations again & I'll just send out this box as soon as I hear from you, hon. If you're reading this, PM ME!!
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