anyone raising their children "unassisted"? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 93 Old 11-08-2006, 10:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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By that I mean, without a doctor.
So how many of you also take an unassisted approach to your children's healthcare? We chose UP/UC for our son and are doing the same for our current pregnancy. Our son has never seen a doctor...however, I know we are lucky, he is almost 20 months and has had only 2 minor colds and 1 fever (that he slept off in 3 hours). I'm an herbalist and feel confident in dh and my ability to treat most things and we consider our grocery and health food store spending to be our healthcare costs. Anyone else like this? Just curious!
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#2 of 93 Old 11-08-2006, 10:39 PM
 
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I am not doing UA parenting, but I wanted to comment on your user name. It was my daughter's nick-name before conception, when we were having a hard time conceiving. I love the meaning, Life. Your user name brings back some special memories.

7yo: "Mom,I know which man is on a quarter and which on is on a nickel. They both have ponytails, but one man has a collar and the other man is naked. The naked man was our first president."
 
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#3 of 93 Old 11-08-2006, 10:40 PM
 
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Yes, we are for the most part...

Our last son was born unassisted/unattended and for the most part our healthcare as a family has become that way as well...

We have seen a chiropractor though and I do consult my doctor at times....and it is that type of relationship...a partnership when I feel needed...rather then the way I used to handle healthcare (going to the doctor, nodding, and then obeying!!! LOL)

I am learning about herbal care for our family more and more...I grow our own herbs and vegetables and have a few books on herbal medicine...

Would you recommend any books/websites?

~Charlene~
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#4 of 93 Old 11-08-2006, 10:44 PM
 
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yes, that is what we do.

There has been only one time in the last 2 years that anyone in our family has seen a doctor, and it was my husband who gashed his head on a corner cabinet, and I could see his skull. He needed staples.

Other than that, we have dealt with everything with rest, homeopathy, Reiki, and herbs.

We have had many colds, stomach bugs, mastitis, UTIs, coxsackie, mumps, and many other minor illnesses. All without a doc.

I love it, and know its right for our family. Just like birth, it would take a true emergency for us to see a doctor.

wife to my awesome DH, homeschooling, unassisted birthing, food growing, life loving mama to 5 crazy monkeys. :
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#5 of 93 Old 11-08-2006, 10:51 PM
 
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my daughters are 4 and 2 and both have *never* been to the doctors, and I'm proud of that!

I keep them well through a balance of good whole food, exercise and energy protection.

They've *never* been on antibiotics, and have never been vaccinated either.

They are strong kids because of that.
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#6 of 93 Old 11-08-2006, 11:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the replies! I'm glad I'm not the only one. In our area, our "strange lifestyle" is not accepted and there aren't any doctors who would be supportive either...so between my being an herbalist and dh being a massage therapist, we do it ourselves. For me, I feel that not having negative input (too many mamas in my neighborhood are trying to bulk up their kids or make them talk sooner to please their docs) really helps me listen to my gut when it comes to keeping us all healthy.
The only chemical meds ever used in our home was by dh after the only doctor visit any of us have had...he took aspirin after having wisdom teeth pulled with no meds, only nitrous! Ouch!: (Oh, and he proceeded to through up the aspirin.)

Our grandmothers knew what to do to treat all kinds of stuff...my mom remembers what her mom did for her when she had German measles...and no dr. was involved. It worked then, why not now?

USAmma, you made me smile...no one has commented on my username before and I'm glad it brings good thoughts to you. I like it too!

jiva

: Disclaimer: I'm not dissing people who use doctors (who knows, I may need one some day too), I was really just wondering how many chose not too.

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#7 of 93 Old 11-08-2006, 11:49 PM
 
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We do more or less, except for the much against my insticts visit this past week (I posted about it in the lactivist forum). Zoe has been to the DR twice in her life and Grace hasn't been since the last time she received a vaxx at 1 and she is four now.

Next babe will be UP UC
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#8 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 12:17 AM
 
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I have not UP/UC'd, but went to a midwife for care. Learned about herbs in my school, and have been applying that knowlede to caring for my family for the last four years. I acknowledge and understand when situations are out of my scope and will therefore visit someone who can help me. We are lucky that our insurance will cover just about ANYTHING out there, so when we see a care physician we go to a Naturopathic Doctor (ND) unless other care is needed. We have only had to go to a non-ND care giver a very few times since we've been together (8 years).
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#9 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 12:29 AM
 
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We used a midwife, but dd has not seen a dr. for anything thus far.

-Angela
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#10 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 02:55 AM
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Doing a UP/UC and not planning on having "well-baby" checkups (what a term... ugh) or anything like that. Sure, if he breaks his arm or something, we'll see a doctor. But, just like a pp said- its just like birthing- it would take a true emergency to get us into a doctor's office or hospital.

Laura, mama to Henry 01.28.07 uc.jpg
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Loving on Catherine, my  rainbow1284.gif 09.01.11, UC

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#11 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 03:44 AM
 
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Allopathic medicine we save for true emergent situations, and even then, sparingly.

I have retired from administration work, so if you have a question about anything MDC-related, please contact Cynthia Mosher. Thanks!
 
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#12 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 03:55 AM
 
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I haven't done UC yet...but I do want to comment that I think you, the OP, are likely going to be all your ds needs, barring any emergency. You're an herbalist and that alone should be enough for non-emergent things. I'm very jealous actually...it's something I'd love to be! Well baby checks are such a blasted waste of time and money....they really are. I'm terrified of CPS though...that's my reasoning for taking ds now, to have a paper trail to show that YES I am concerned about my son's health. I've stopped vaxing and we refuse certain medical treatments for religious reasons...so I'm always afraid that could be held against me.

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#13 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 04:00 AM
 
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We use a chiro weekly.

I also have a traditional midwife on hand as needed.

We are vax free and only seek conventional med for emergencies.

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#14 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 04:46 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alegna View Post
We used a midwife, but dd has not seen a dr. for anything thus far.

-Angela
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#15 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 06:35 AM
 
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My babe has never seen a Dr. - the older kids haven't gone in nearly 4 years.

~Marie : Mom to DS(11), DS(10), DD(8), DD(4), DD(2), & Happily Married to DH 12 yrs.!
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#16 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 07:15 AM
 
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My son went for *one* well-baby at 1.5 months.

We haven't been back and aren't planning to. I'm learning all I can about natural medicine so we never do (barring a serious emergency, of course)!
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#17 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 09:33 AM
 
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First off let me say I really admire all of you ladies. I would love to do up/uc but dh and I would be too concerned after having a c-sect last time. Maybe if this baby goes well the next one will be ua. And I am an herbalist and so do treat ds for everything he comes down with. I really don't take him to the dr except for well baby visit (which don't seem necessary). The only reason I take him to well baby visits is because I'm worried about the need to cover my butt....isn't there a concern that cps could get involved? I spoke with a naturaopathic dr once who said that since nd are liscenced in ma i need to be seeing a md regular so that dss can't acuse me of medical neglect. is that just her opinion, my state or something everyone ua parent has to deal with? thanks
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#18 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 10:05 AM
 
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It's funny that I stumbled upon this thread because just yesterday, my 7yo dd told me as we were on our way to the walk-in clinic (first time she'd seen a doctor in a long long while) : "Mom, I don't have a doctor so you and dad are my doctors, right?" I replied with a "sort of" kind of answer. Makes me smile today.
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#19 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 12:02 PM
 
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We also use allopathic medicine at a minimum. I did take my son to a few "well baby" visits, but then I was like uhhh...we dont vaccinate, so whats the point? Part of it was that I wanted to establish a relationship w/ the ped I found. (supportive of non-vax, very anti-circ, and an X homebirth midwife!) We've since moved.

He also went to the DR. when he had a SUPER high fever (103.9 with tylenol) and I could NOT figure out what was wrong. Turned out to be Roseola, so now I'll know for the next babe.

We do go to the chiro regularly.

But as many PP mentioned, we prefer to use western medicine for emergencies, and use alternative meds (herbs/homeopathy) for most everything else.

Unfortunately my poor stepsons go to the dr. on probably a monthly basis, and have had so many rounds of antibiotics its not even funny.

Lisser

Alyssa, wife to one, mama to 2 boys, 5.5 and 4. Living and learning on our little farm.
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#20 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 12:21 PM
 
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I worry about CPS a little. I mean, someone could call because they saw my two-year-old running around naked in 50-degree weather. It could happen. What we did was find a doctor who wasn't going to hassle us about the well-child checkups. I think it helped that she was an FP -- she had more going on than making money from vaccinations. I just called up her office, I said I was her patient, and that I'd like to add my children as well. This was also in part because, around here, you can't get in to see a doctor unless they already have you listed as a client and have your insurance info checked out. So in the event that one of my children should need to see a doctor, we would have someone we knew to go to and not just have to go to urgent care and take whatever hack they assigned us to. And then I could also say, if anyone asked, that "our family doctor is _____". I wouldn't have to say that my kids had never actually seen her. Although that's not even technically true, as they come to some of my appointments with me. So she did meet them, she just didn't do anything for them. We're in a bit of a bind now because she moved to another state. I've been getting by with, "Our doctor was Dr. ________ and we haven't found a new doctor yet" and then try to divert the asker's attention by talking about why she left and expressing my outrage about it. (She wanted to be able to attend VBACs and the local hospital doesn't allow them anymore.)

So no, three of my four children have never been to see a doctor. Three of my four children have had newborn exams done by midwives. My last has never been checked out by any professional. Another poster said that they'd been lucky that they've never had to consult a doctor. I don't know if I consider it so much luck as just what happens when you treat your children well, feed them good foods, make sure they can attend to all their bodies' needs, etc. Yes, I know there are freak things that can happen. But I bet the vast majority of people would be and stay healthy if they'd just do those simple things.
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#21 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 02:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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When I was pregnant, my brother talked to a dr. friend of his who told him that if I didn't see a dr. then CS could find out and take my child...HOWEVER, my mom's friend worked for CS for several years and she said that a UP/UC was the least of their worries and that if anything did come up, all I would have to do is show them my herbalist certification and paperwork verifying that I have taken courses in nutrition and midwifery (which I have). At the most, they would want to interview me to make sure I knew what I was talking about. They would just want to know that the parents are educated and not being negligent (I think even my massive book collection (natural healthcare and some medical textbooks could have been used as proof). I would basically only take my son to the dr. (or go myself) for broken bones or something along those lines. I do wish I had a dr. to consult with and to have on hand for any emergency trips...but I don't and it really seems to bother my mom more than anyone.

Oh, and when we went to the Health Dept. to get his birth certificate, no one said anything threatening...they were more like "we haven't had one of these in a looooong time!".

jiva

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#22 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 02:41 PM
 
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we dont do the traditional well baby thing. however my daughter, when she was newborn, was very sick and we have had to spend time in the ER and hospital and used antibiotics and done tests galore. she is fine now. we also live on a farm and choose to vaccinate for tetanus.

every time we go to the dr's office we get sick!!!

Hi, I'm Tabitha. I'm a homeschooling mother of four: ds (11) dd (9) ds (7) ds (5) And I'm expecting a fifth in 2014! Find me at http://www.omelay.blogspot.com
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#23 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 03:26 PM
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We try to, but DS is severely asthmatic and needs medicine for that. We're trying to cut out all the environmental allergens that we can and it seems to be helping, but he goes to public school and it's impossible to anything about the allergens there. We stopped taking DD to the doctor when she was about 6 mos old and realized well-baby visits were mainly just for vaccinations, which we don't do.
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#24 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 03:32 PM
 
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I avoid allopathic medicine as much as possible with my children. We don't do well child visits, we don't go in for sickness and I don't give them OTC medicine. We also don't vaccinate and they've never had antibiotics.

I'm reserving allopathic medical care for if they are so ill that the very definite risks of doctors and hospitals are outweighed by some benefit that I can see. That rarely happens if at all in my opinion.

I would be more concerned about CPS if I was seeing a doctor that might not agree with my parenting choices and choose to turn me in. It seems more risky to flaunt myself in front of the establishment than to just go about my business.

Laura

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#25 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 05:14 PM
 
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We don't take our kids to the dr. routinely, but we would if it were necessary. We don't give any type of drugs, either but we would in an emergency. The twins were born at home 10 months ago and have never set foot in a doctor's office. My 3 year old goes to preschool 2 mornings a week and it was required he get a check-up. The vax waiver was really easy but he still needed the checkup. The dr. was very cool about us not vaxing, although I am sure he disagrees with it. He was very hands off and was just like "keep doing what you're doing, mama." Anyway, I told him we don't take our kids to the dr. and the only reason we were there was for the preschool and he understood. He was recommended by our homeopathic/holistic dr. I myself go to the chiropractor but have not taken the kids yet. I plan on talking to him when I have my UC (he is a family practioner) and asking if he would do back up in case of emergency.

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#26 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 06:07 PM
 
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I would never want to get an appointment specifically for my kid with some doctor, because they most likely would question me about vaccination. I don't want flak for something I know is right, and theres no reason for them to see my kids anyways, cause they are extremely healthy.

I don't worry about CPS, cause I live in canada I would just be honest with them, if they did contact me. "why should my kids go to the doctors? I keep them very healthy"

For high fevers..... VITAMEN A..... It really does work. Something I've learned from my old health food store buddy. My kids will eat cod liver capsules (which is really high in vit. a) so it's preventative too. We've been taking cod liver oil since the beginning of 'flu season' The body will get hotter and hotter, during illness, if there is not enough vit.a to deal with the fever.

never have used OTC meds either, like advil, or tylenol (which do not heal the things that you give them for)

we use homeopathy, herbs, vitamens, fresh air and sunshine, love. I am their doctor, and midwife... My kids are way better off, I feel, than kids who go to the doc. regularly.

I would take my kids to the hospital if they had a broken arm, or something along those lines. That's when allopathy is useful.

I would take them to a ND, or herbalist, or chinese/ayurvedic doctor if there was something up with them that I couldn't handle.
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#27 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 06:37 PM
 
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#28 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 06:43 PM
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i will probably utilize the medical profession only if necessary. but there are a few concerns (eye) that might require medical and even surgical attentions and skills. so, not entirely. but, if i can do without it--i will.
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#29 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 08:05 PM
 
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okay - I agree with most of the posters and only take my kids to the doc for emergencies - or if they need a signature to go to baseball camp - my fear is this though - suppose one of my rambunctious boys breaks an arm or has another accident that requires stitches and we end up in the hospital? all the forms, quesitons, everything linked to the SS#...that is my fear - that the cps would step in then. my city is not very 'natural living' friendly....how do you deal with hospitals in a true emergency?
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#30 of 93 Old 11-09-2006, 08:43 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zoebird View Post
i will probably utilize the medical profession only if necessary. but there are a few concerns (eye) that might require medical and even surgical attentions and skills. so, not entirely. but, if i can do without it--i will.
(emphasis mine)

Do you mean pink eye, or stuff like that? or serious eye injuries? My kids have had pink eye a few times, and we took care of that at home. Cold black tea helps to dry it up, and chamomile helps too, as does homeopathic pulsatilla.
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