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#31 of 59 Old 10-26-2007, 03:11 PM
 
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I am so sorry you're going through this. I am always in shock at the nightmare they put some parents through when accross town a child is being beaten to death.
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#32 of 59 Old 10-26-2007, 03:12 PM
 
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I just wanted to say I envy your strength and persevearance and the fact you had a birth I so long for and will never have.

My heart breaks for you and your little girl. It's awful what they are doing to you. May light decend upon you and yours and the darkness receede from you.

Sheal
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#33 of 59 Old 10-26-2007, 03:28 PM
 
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Cranberry, I just read your story and both my dh and I are just enraged and deeply saddened for you and your babe; what an evil has been committed against you and your sweet child! :

And LUNCH MEAT for an infant????!!!! Unbelievable.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrskennedy View Post
While this too is true, they still can't remove the child unless neglect/abuse are PROVEN. Which they wouldn't be in most UC cases.
Why do you think this? It is sensible, but I can say for sure that where we live, the legislation regarding childcare workers in this field of employ is clear that the worker need only state with intent that s/he 'acted in good faith' in determining the course of action taken, even if that is removal; then it is up to the parents to prove that there wasn't any reason for the removal. If it was shown to be unnecessary or even of ill-intent or incompetence on the part of the social worker, there is no legal recourse whatsoever for the parents in investigating the worker or removing the parental records as reported by that worker. They may regain custody though, and that is the only possible bright light in the situation.




I have been wondering how a UC can be used as reason for investigation in places where a reason is required (not here, obviously) since as far as I am aware, an unborn child is not under the jurisdiction of the state. Here, a child is considered 'born' once s/he has emerged past the umbilicus. What that would mean to me is that if the child is born, and has no health issues, seeing a dr doesn't make sense and the immediate situation surrounding the child's birth is completely outside the jurisdiction of any court or social service agency, no? I'm just curious; it would seem that even mentioning the UC as initial cause for investigation would void the whole process (if a reason is required by legislation, that is- again, not here).

Are childcare workers given authority to make declarations and investigate pregnancy now? I know this has come up in other cases before (court-ordered c/s, for instance), but has been subsequently overthrown for the obvious legal and social implications.

Even though we have no legal recourse here, I would certainly be fighting the jurisdiction issue, one that falls outside the social workers' clauses. They cannot come and confiscate my pets or my vehicle or my husband, and they cannot make decrees regarding a child that hasn't yet been born, but again, once the child is born, they can do and say as they please... :

Well, I've been absent for 8 months, and during that time, it turns out that I have completely transformed. You are all precious. Thank you for being here and sharing your lives. You are truly a gift. namaste.gif Jan. 23, 2012

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#34 of 59 Old 10-26-2007, 03:49 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PreggieUBA2C View Post
Even though we have no legal recourse here, I would certainly be fighting the jurisdiction issue, one that falls outside the social workers' clauses. They cannot come and confiscate my pets or my vehicle or my husband, and they cannot make decrees regarding a child that hasn't yet been born, but again, once the child is born, they can do and say as they please... :
It's the epitome of a perverse and gross abuse of power ment to protect those truely in need of it---And that original meaning has long since been lost to these people. I really think it's become an issue of "chest puffing" and ego-stroking to abuse that power now.....It's sick, degrading, and ultimately, a humiliation to both us as a country, and as individuals.
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#35 of 59 Old 10-26-2007, 11:27 PM
 
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Well, this reveals that while UC was the initial reason for the investigation, there were other concerns that led to their actions. It wasn't solely UC that prompted the removal of the child. They were concerned about the child's feeding and nutrition and her having been cold by their standards upon arrival at the hospital, as well as the OP's mental state. Whether these are legitimate or not remains to be seen. I would recommend that you do all you can to prove that you will meet all of your daughter's nutrition needs, as well as manage any mental conditions you may have. Good luck.

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#36 of 59 Old 10-27-2007, 01:11 AM
 
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cranberry99 to you and your daughter! I simply don't know what else to say... What you've been through most recently is beyond belief, beyond horrible...
I didn't see... Do you have a lawyer? Or perhaps several, who could consult true experts so the state knows you're indeed feeding your child appropriately, even if you're not giving her the specific foods they suggest, etc? You need people on your side--people with clout, degrees, reputations, etc, but who understand where you're coming from. It seems the state has everything, and you have nothing. And while you and your daughter are the victims here, you need to try to forget about that and be the strong, fighting mama you were meant to be. You'll need to grieve, and you'll need to heal. But now is the time to prove yourself and gather people who can vouch for you and your activities and competence as a mother. You need support IRL, and no one is going to just offer it. You have to find it. Then, maybe this whole thing will be at least a little easier. What a horrid nightmare!
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#37 of 59 Old 10-27-2007, 01:16 AM
 
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i read that and wow

i do want to say your birth sounds beautiful, and the guinea pig part is just precious! :

i hope you get this fixed, by finding some worker who knows the facts instead of being randomly "educated" and helps you guys out, you defiintely need it.
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#38 of 59 Old 10-27-2007, 01:19 AM
 
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Why did you take DD to the hospital or doctor--whichever one you did? The reason is no help now, of course, and I'm sorry for that. But I think part of the mistake some of us UC'ers make--myself included, as I did the same--is taking our perfectly healthy UC babies to a hospital or doctor.
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#39 of 59 Old 10-28-2007, 11:32 PM
 
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Cranberry, here's a page that may give you some insight into CPS, why they do things, what powers they have and don't have, and what you can do now that you're involved with them:
hhttp://www.justicewomen.com/tips_bewarechildprotectiveservices.html
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#40 of 59 Old 10-28-2007, 11:36 PM
 
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BTW, in your story you say, "I should have hired a doula." You need to know that a doula or even a midwife wouldn't change the outcome of your case-- esp. since you say there's an mw being prosecuted simultaneously.
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#41 of 59 Old 10-31-2007, 04:11 PM
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Cranberry I'm in Iowa and pg right now and you're scaring the crap out of me.

, momma.
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#42 of 59 Old 03-28-2008, 06:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Update:
Daughter returned home after 15 months of not being in home. 2 social workers, my doctor and therapist have all told me I would never have been involved with DHS except for the fact that my parents chose to make negative statements about me which trumped what they had to say. Her transition is going okay. She was fine the first couple of weeks, had 2 great days at her new daycare, then promptly got sick and has been extremely fussy ever since. I feel terrible having to leave her there. She is getting fussier I hope it's just a phase. Anyways I much appreciate everyone's interest and support - will write more later
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#43 of 59 Old 03-28-2008, 08:11 PM
 
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oh cranberry, I'm so sorry it has lasted that long.

I have BTDT, if you need to talk just PM me.

There is definitely an adjustment period and it is hard on everybody. I'm so glad she's back with you!
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#44 of 59 Old 03-28-2008, 08:40 PM
 
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It's wonderful that your dd is back with you! Take it one day at a time. I'm sure if she got sick that would make her fussy. Congratulations on making it through!

Mom to DD ('06) and DS ('08)
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#45 of 59 Old 03-29-2008, 04:03 AM
 
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congrats!

i am so very sorry it took so long, i gope your little daughter and yourself can learn and grow together and bond to be a nice fsamily and try to put this behiond you. i know you and likely she will never forget the separation but i hope something good and a great relationship will come of it, if nothing else.
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#46 of 59 Old 03-29-2008, 04:49 AM
 
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I'm so sorry for your awful ordeal. I had a brush with cps after my first UC (because of a family member!) and really just feel deep down that we got lucky nothing came of it and the case was only open a month, I just can't imagine if they had deemed it appropriate to have removed my baby (they threatened it and that alone about shattered me). I'm thrilled that your dd is home with you and I wish you both much healing and much deserved peace.
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#47 of 59 Old 03-31-2008, 06:33 AM
 
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I'm terribly sorry your DD was gone so long... But so overjoyed she's home!!! Sending positive energies to all of you for peace, strength and healing all the time!
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#48 of 59 Old 03-31-2008, 01:35 PM
 
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I'm so glad to hear you've got your Dd home with you again

And I'm so sorry you both had to go through all that you did to be able to be together. Your birth sounded lovely, and I hope that in time you'll be able to enjoy it's memory for the glorious, empowering, natural process that it was without regreting it because ignorant power hungry fools used it aginst you.

To you both, be well Mama.
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#49 of 59 Old 03-31-2008, 01:54 PM
 
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this is one of the craziest threads I've read in awhile. I don't know how I missed it the first time around.

Cran, I'm happy your dd is back in you care. What a horrible disconnect to have heppened for whatever reasons. I hope you are both able to heal and learn about eachother.

Carrie, The Birthteacher CCE and Doula, real mom to five; and womb-mom to G. born at 23w by emergency C. 12/09
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#50 of 59 Old 03-31-2008, 02:11 PM
 
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I am glad you have your baby back! That is wonderful news.
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#51 of 59 Old 03-31-2008, 04:08 PM
 
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I'm so glad to hear your DD is back with you.
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#52 of 59 Old 03-31-2008, 09:30 PM
 
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I'm in DSM, let me know if I can do anything. ((Hugs)) Seems like ever since the Shelby Duis (sp?) case where DHS dropped the ball they've been power trippy ever since.

ETA - If you haven't already, get yourself a GOOD lawyer. Like, right now would be too late, yesterday is better.
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#53 of 59 Old 04-03-2008, 08:27 AM
 
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What a sad story! I'm glad your baby is home Lunchmeats and mac & Cheese to a baby????? My 4 yr old and 9 yr old don't get that crap!! I can't believe "professionals" are telling you these things. A Mommy knows whats best!
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#54 of 59 Old 07-21-2008, 11:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks to everyone for their thoughts, prayers, and hope...my daughter has now been home with me for 6 months. She is doing very well and is bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. A new social worker on my case (the old one went on maternity leave, thank god) is someone I attended college with and therefore see one another more as peers, a much better relationship. My case is in its final phases. Soon I will either bargain with the state regarding my name's placement on the state's (NATIONAL) abuse registry (for giving birth at home & not giving "required medical treatment" for a healthy baby girl) or stand trial to challenge my name being placed there. Everyone seems to think my name should at least be taken off the registry, even if DHS is too stubborn to remove it from their own files. I do hope someday to teach again so hopefully I can get cleared. Any thoughts, suggestions, would be appreciated. Thanks again for your support and concern. I hope my case hasn't scared anyone away from home birthing. I'm still interested in hearing about the situations of other midwives/ people especially in the midwest whose situations mirror my own.
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#55 of 59 Old 07-22-2008, 01:48 AM
 
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i just don't get how they can legally require treatment for a perfectly healthy child... i mean i get how and why they're twisting it to make it look like you should have been at the hospital, but if the doctors established that babe was totally healthy, and given the fact that you are the parent, i just can't fathom how they can make such a ridiculous leap of logic. that's so just infuriating! and the abuse registry thing has got to be the most ridiculous thing i've ever heard. and oh yeah,
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#56 of 59 Old 07-22-2008, 01:55 AM
 
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Cranberry,

I have just read through this thread, and my heart broke in pieces for you and your little one. I have a lot of frustrated words to share, but I'm sure you've had enough of stress by now, so I will just offer you hugs and comforting thoughts going your way.

As to the abuse registry issue - my first thought was to fight it out to the end, but I do not know your situation and all the details of it. I'm sure that you will do what's best.

As to CPS - I am not at liberty to discuss any details, but I was in a situation a while ago that allowed me to have quite a look at the system. I can say one thing - you wouldn't be able to find that much pathology at a forensic pathologists' convention.
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#57 of 59 Old 07-23-2008, 12:21 AM
 
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What are the consequences of standing trial to have your name removed and losing the case? Permanent placement on the registry? And if you bargain with the state - you're still on the registry but with a less severe charge? Appalling that you shoulder the burden to prove your own innocence.

I am glad you are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, you have been forced to walk a very lonely and dark road and I'm so happy your dd is with you and doing well.

Mom to DD ('06) and DS ('08)
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#58 of 59 Old 07-23-2008, 01:10 AM
 
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Cranberry - sorry you had a such a terrible time. : It is sad when families do such awful things to each other. The government should never be able to take a child from its mother over such trivial issues. What about checks and balances? Suddenly I am not so sad that my MIL has been telling people I accidently had my baby at home! I think I am going to stop telling anyone I don't know very well I had a UC. Most people think it was an accident, it hurts my pride a little but it looks like it is better for them to think that than to risk someone reporting us! (NOT THAT WE HAVE DONE ANYTHING WRONG.)
How is it that late term abortions are perfectly fine but having a baby at home is negligent?!! It makes no sense. I thought that taking your baby for a newborn checkup was a way to show you care about your child's health and keep CPS out of your hair. I'm glad my OB and our Ped were supportive! It could have been a nightmare if they had decided to report me.

 nak.gif Mommy to fencing.gifKai 2/03, hammer.gifCaden 1/08, energy.gif Kara 10/09, angel1.gif 3/21/13, &

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#59 of 59 Old 04-25-2014, 09:11 PM
 
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This site could create some awareness on scandals. I don't know if it's the proper thread though, but check it out. http://www.scandalsatschool.com/

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