The importance of 'catching'? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 43 Old 11-09-2007, 04:22 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MommaGreenBean View Post
I see. It's more of a first to hold/control issue (in some cases) isn't it?
I don't think so. I think it has more to do with not hideously interrupting the natural birth and bonding process by collecting and removing the newborn from the mother. And that was more the drift I got from reading the posts that the above.
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#32 of 43 Old 11-09-2007, 05:07 PM
 
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I'd rather catch mine than let them plop onto the floor Though of course they can be born that way. I have a video of squatting births and in one the baby just squirts right out onto the bed. People are always blown away by that esp if they're used to the head-yanking births on Discovery Health.

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#33 of 43 Old 11-10-2007, 03:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Romana9+2 View Post
I don't think so. I think it has more to do with not hideously interrupting the natural birth and bonding process by collecting and removing the newborn from the mother. And that was more the drift I got from reading the posts that the above.
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#34 of 43 Old 11-11-2007, 12:48 AM
 
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I wanted the first people to touch my baby to actually care about the beauty of the moment.My first was like that even though it was a hospital.The OB and nurse told DS welcome and gave us all hugs.My second was so assembly lined that it never felt like the miracle it should have been and I had no family with me so I should have felt more support.I want to be the first or whoever touches my baby first to feel the miracle and aknowledge it.

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#35 of 43 Old 11-16-2007, 09:02 PM
 
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i wanted to be the first to touch him as wel. since i was old enough to realize that my mom being asleep (general-emergency c) when i was born meant lots of people who didnt care about me - and my grandparents saw, touched and held me before her it is just so impersonal, and ...ugh. most people whos job it is to be a doc/nurse/mw have no problem with it and force themselves to take over and do whatever, and....
it has really bothered me. imo it should be the mom or dad ( or a friend, something, but really imo the mom) who is the first to see and hold ther own child.
my first, the doc, and i think 2 nurses held him before me, and im still upset about it.
my second, i had a uc and i caught (on my knees in the water) and im sooo much more happy about that!
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#36 of 43 Old 11-17-2007, 02:21 PM
 
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I knew I *could* catch my own baby (and I touched them many times as they were crowning, and as I was stretching my labia around their head to avoid tearing, etc...), but I enjoy the ritual of birthing the baby into my husband's waiting hands. It's an amazing act of trust and intimacy, and really gives the feeling of having come a full circle.

One of these times I may catch the baby, but so far I've done it the way I've felt led to.

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#37 of 43 Old 11-17-2007, 04:34 PM
 
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It's important to me that I catch this baby or else birth her on to a pile of pillows or towels or into the water.

dd will be available if I can't follow through; I'm a bit nervous about it because I gave over SO much control to the midwives for my first three births. I don't know who caught d and ds--I'm asuming it was the mws because exy was such a nuisance and so in the way and so fidgety, especially with ds, whoich was a nice, comfortable labour that I would have really enjoyed if he hadn't kept rushing me because he didn't want to miss the ball game on teevee.

With one birth, the midwife forceably moved my hands down to touch my baby's head while it was crowing and kept saying in a conescending tone of voice, "Do you feel that? That's your BABY!" and all I could think was "Stop touching me, you b*tch, I don't care what it is any more, I just want this thing out of my body!"

I certainly hope I feel differently with a UC and 15-20 more years on me, but like I said, I've got dd in an emergency just in case, and I really think it's because the bonding/birthing process was messed up a bit with all those people around.

Overall, I still think I had pretty good experiences with the midwife-assisted births, but I am learning that it's okay not to demean myself or trivialize the things they did that totally bugged me. They meant well, but for pete's sake when you trust someone to be around you at such a private and vulnerable part of your life, it's okay to get pissed off when they steal your watch (even if it was an accident), throw away one of your pillows (even if it WAS bloodstained) without telling you, and rearrange your living room furniture without asking permission!
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#38 of 43 Old 11-21-2007, 07:11 PM
 
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Originally Posted by BinahYeteirah View Post
When I had a midwife, I felt a disconnect from the lower half of my body, as if she was "in charge" down there. I don't think I fully experienced what was happening as my baby emerged, although what I did experience was amazing!
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DH or I will be catching this next one I hope. I don't think DH will want to. He's more of a watcher, lol.
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#39 of 43 Old 11-21-2007, 07:41 PM
 
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I don't know if DH will want to catch this one... I think it would really help him be more bonded and into the experience, and of course closer to the LO... then again, if I'm not birthing hands & knees, I'd rather just do it myself. I was the last person to hold DS, after every single family member, and it wasn't even a c/s.

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#40 of 43 Old 11-22-2007, 03:54 PM
 
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I guess it's important to a lot of people because there is some symbolism going on with the act itself. Catching by itself isn't as important, ds3 landed on the bed and he was cool. Dh caught dd, and I don't want to say that is the reason for their special bond, but Dh does have that extra special memory of catching his own dd, and I'm glad for that.
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#41 of 43 Old 11-23-2007, 02:17 AM
 
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DH caught DS2, and he says it is just very cool to him that he was the very first person to touch our newborn. It has nothing to do with control. He just thought it was neat and exciting. The first person my son had contact with in this world is his daddy. It's just cool to be the first to hold that new little life in your hands, to be the first to lay eyes on him, etc. *shrugs* I guess people put so much importance on it, though, because they seem to think whoever "delivers" the baby needs to be very skilled. I had a nurse ask me, what if the baby gets tangled in the cord? Well, you unwrap it. My husband can tie his shoes and pick out the knots in our son's; I think he can take a cord off a baby, lol.

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#42 of 43 Old 11-23-2007, 09:00 AM
 
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I really want to be the one to catch my baby this time i'm planning on giveing birth in water and would love to be able to lift my baby out of the water myself and put him strait to the breast.

Becky, sahm to angel.gif25/04/2000 Chloe 12/04/2002 Cameron 19/02/2004 Caitlin 28/06/2005 angel.gif24/07/2006 and Caden 14/03/2008

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#43 of 43 Old 11-24-2007, 02:27 AM
 
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Both of our UC babes were 'caught' by the floor. This time I prepared for that by having a pillow directly between my legs. I birthed both times on my knees with my chest and arms supported by a chair. There was no way for me to reach to catch the babe, but this time, I held his head until he rocketted through and out and then I picked him up and held him. Last time, our friend was there and she picked ds3 up and handed him straight to me. I was fine with that; I was stunned at the time; I just kept staring at him on the floor, so she picked him up and that brought me back to reality.

I won't be having more children, so that was it. I thought it would be amazing to have been able to reach down and guide the baby out, but both UCs ended with such a forceful emergence that I was just glad I was close to the floor. I am happy with how they turned out and don't lament that what I thought was ideal didn't happen; I no longer consider that ideal for me anyway because my UCs were so beautiful just as they were .

Well, I've been absent for 8 months, and during that time, it turns out that I have completely transformed. You are all precious. Thank you for being here and sharing your lives. You are truly a gift. namaste.gif Jan. 23, 2012

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