Introducing myself and askinhg for support - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-13-2008, 03:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I've been a lurker here for years. i've posted a little, but never regularly.

My dd was born in Sept of '06. it was a planned UC that ended in a transfer at which time they highjacked my baby and put her in NICU for 48 hrs. We transferred when we freaked out in transition. looking back now if we would have waited she would have been born easily at home. i was only at the hospital for 18 mins. when she was born.

The whole experience was so traumatic i was depressed and withdrawn for the better part of a year. it has taken me until now to even be able to write about it.

i am 37 weeks pregnant now and will have my UC this time. My only fear is that like last time, what if i freak out? i was well-educated, we both were, but it being our first baby we didn't know how much one could freak out.
So i'm trying to deal with that fear now. i know if i were to transfer this time, it would devastate me for much longer.

so i'm just looking for encouragement and support. also i would like to post on here when i go into labor and that way if we have any questions, maybe someone would be around to answer them.

Thanks ladies!
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Old 06-13-2008, 03:21 PM
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i think it's a good idea to post here for labor support.

as for the confidence, i suppose that just has to be worked through or into or whatever the right preposition is. perhaps just deep breathing is a good place to start.

good luck with everything!
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Old 06-13-2008, 03:38 PM
 
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I think your second time with birthing will be a bit easier as you know how much you freaked out last time! It was for me and the second time I made sure never to say neg things like I can't or I want drugs I was very withit about what came out of me mouth! I still thought some of those things but brushed them off. I knew that the end was near at that point where as the first time I had no idea how close I really was.
This is a great place to come in labor and ask for comfort! 3weekish to go!! how exciting!
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Old 06-13-2008, 04:53 PM
 
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Congratulations!

I can so relate. My first attempt at homebirthing ended in a hospital transfer, too. I just was afraid with my labor lasting so long, and my being so tired, I didn't feel like I could dope anymore. I was treated like crap, and I spent months afterward in a depressive fog. But I went on to have two successful UCs after that, so it can be done. Surround yourself with all the supportive info you can.
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Old 06-13-2008, 06:01 PM
 
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I found "Birthing from Within" a great book to help guide through past issues, but to work through past issues takes time. So, I would just recommend daily affermations telling yourself that you CAN go through transition and you CAN and WILL deal with the pain as it comes and to take it one contraction at a time. I always like to kinda do a mental pat on the back after each difficult contraction. Also talk to the baby when things start getting difficult and talk about how it will be soon and you will be holding him/her and how excited you are for that and how excited you are about loving him/her when he/she comes out and that you are BOTH doing a great job, etc.

I don't know, that is all that comes to mind.

Julie- living and learning with dh A and dc M (00), A (02), J (02), J (05), A (06), B (07), S (08), ? (10)
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Old 06-14-2008, 03:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the response.

one problem last time was i didn't have typical contractions. my contractions started out double peaked and would last 10 mins, and then break for 60 secs. So needless to say, i was worn out.

i think now some of that could have been from dehydration so i am staying on top of that now.

we've also taken the Hypnobirthing classes this time so we've been doing the breathing and affirmations for a couple of months now. it has helped tremendously and i found the classes great. i'll let you know after wards how it works!

The baby drop down last night. He is so low i feel like he is going to fall out. so maybe not 3 weeks!!!!
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Old 06-14-2008, 04:32 PM
 
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My first two were hospital births, but I do remeber freaking out at transitions with my first. With my second I remeber freaking out but then saying to myself...this is normal, I'm okay, the pain is temproary.....my third birth went so fast the only thing I was freaking out about was weather or not the midwifes would get set up in time.

Your husband can be a great support for that transition period. Now that he has been through it, and can understand how intense that trasition can be, he can coach you through it.

This being your second, I'm thinking that your just going to be so much more prepared mentally. You can mentally prepare yourself all you want with the first one, but you really don't understand what you will go thorugh till your in the midst of it. You have that experiance now. So you do understand, and you do know. Your going to do great!
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Old 06-19-2008, 12:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the encouragement. you are exactly right, the second time you at least have experience behind you.

I had DH check dialation out of curisosity and he said, "how dialated do you want to be?"
WHAT?
"you are definitely 2 but your cervix is so thin and pliable i can move it"

We are in Atlanta in a rental house for his work until next Saturday, so we really don't want to have the baby yet. we want to get back home. but i can tell it is going to be soon. i already fell like there is a head in my vagina. so i guess we'll see if we make it back to our house!!
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Old 06-21-2008, 03:24 AM
 
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Congratulations on your upcoming arrival.

And I do think it will be different this time around. Since you know what to expect. I also suspect that you will think twice about transfering again, since you have the memories of the first one (and the short time before the birth).

Try and relax. Your time is quickly arriving.

Any misspellings or grammatical errors in the above statement are intentional;
they are placed there for the amusement of those who like to point them out.
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