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#1 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 01:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am a bit of a worrier by nature.

With my first 2 pregnancies, they were HEAVILY managed. I had 20+ ultrasounds with ds1 and 10 or so with dd1.

Then with ds2 I had 2.

Dd2 I had one at about 20 weeks just to ease my fears and we also found out sex.

Now with #5......I really want to get an ultrasound again.

I have been researching all of the facts. I have been reading stories about not getting one.

But I am afraid. :

So afraid that I am worried that NOT getting one will cause problems with my confidence to UP and UC.

What would you do?

I feel so conflicted.

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#2 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 02:25 PM
 
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Well DH requires me to get one in order for us to UC. It is what HE needs to feel comfortable, and I want him to be comfortable, so I do it. Mine is actually in a little over a week. I'm really excited. After losing my last baby, and having hardly any movement with this one so far, it will be nice to see him/her moving around on the u/s. We're not finding out the sex though, which is also exciting.

I say if YOU need it for your peace of mind, 1 ultrasound further along in the pregnancy isn't going to hurt. (I don't allow ANY dopplers before 12 weeks and no u/s before 20 - I have a hospital midwife as my prenatal care b/c of an induction for pre-eclampsia last time).

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#3 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 02:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well DH requires me to get one in order for us to UC. It is what HE needs to feel comfortable, and I want him to be comfortable, so I do it. Mine is actually in a little over a week. I'm really excited. After losing my last baby, and having hardly any movement with this one so far, it will be nice to see him/her moving around on the u/s. We're not finding out the sex though, which is also exciting.

I say if YOU need it for your peace of mind, 1 ultrasound further along in the pregnancy isn't going to hurt. (I don't allow ANY dopplers before 12 weeks and no u/s before 20 - I have a hospital midwife as my prenatal care b/c of an induction for pre-eclampsia last time).
Thank you for your support. I have been trying not to stress about it but "seeing" the baby really puts me at ease.

Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#4 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 02:36 PM
 
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Where or how would a UP Uc'er get an ultra sound? I might like to have one near the end to be reassured of baby's position but wasn't even sure how to go about that with no PCP.

Also to the OP if it will make you feel more confident and at peace then go for it. Isn't that what uc'ing is about? Being confident and at peace with our bodies and babies?
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#5 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 02:52 PM
 
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I always opt for a ~20 week ultrasound to check the position of the placenta, make sure baby has all his/her body parts and because it makes me feel more at ease. I'll be having mine within the next few weeks and yes, we're finding out the gender.
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#6 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 03:09 PM
 
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I had a 5 minute ultrasound at one of those 3d/4d places, since we're both UPing and UCing. In that time, without the tech telling me, I could tell placental placement, that the basic appendages were present, as well as the sex (she was specifically looking for it, but I could still tell before she said a word). So, it wasn't the world's most technical anatomy scan, but it did give a fair amount of information.

We actually did do it mainly to find out the sex : but I have to say that the visual evidence, combined with what I felt as far as movement, that I had managed to 'influence' a posterior placenta this time (both of my others were anterior) was a nice little confidence booster.

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#7 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 03:09 PM
 
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I have had an ultrasound with each of my three pregnancies, including my two UCs. It gave me confidence, too, and though I have read about the possible risks of ultrasounds, I feel that the risks are very slim for anything serious happening to my babies. That said, I definitely would be against how some doctors use ultrasounds like crazy. The OB I got my U/S from this latest pregnancy routinely did ultrasounds EVERY prenatal visit. No, thanks! I only saw her a couple of times.

I think that if you really want to have an U/S and it gives you confidence, do it. You're informed enough about the risks to make an informed choice.

BTW, all three of my children are perfectly healthy and normal developmentally--I don't think the ultrasounds did them any permanent harm. Just my two cents.
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#8 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 03:19 PM
 
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I always opt for a ~20 week ultrasound to check the position of the placenta, make sure baby has all his/her body parts and because it makes me feel more at ease.
How accurate is the position of the placenta at 20 weeks? I thought it could still move quite a bit...

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#9 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 04:10 PM
 
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I haven't UCed but I would personally still want at least one ultrasound. I like to know what my babies are and I know that it would keep DH from freaking so much to know that the baby "looked" good.

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#10 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 05:26 PM
 
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I had a 5 minute ultrasound at one of those 3d/4d places, since we're both UPing and UCing.
Hmm. I've looked at the website for the place around here, and they require basically a permission slip from your OB, to make sure you're not using them for health care.
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#11 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 05:32 PM
 
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How accurate is the position of the placenta at 20 weeks? I thought it could still move quite a bit...
Yes but if it's nowhere near the cervix at 20 weeks I can totally not worry about it. If it were to be on or near the cervix at 20 weeks I would probably opt for a later ultrasound, but it's not been a problem I've ever encountered.
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#12 of 39 Old 08-22-2008, 06:23 PM
 
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Hmm. I've looked at the website for the place around here, and they require basically a permission slip from your OB, to make sure you're not using them for health care.
Yeah, some of the ones here seem to, but I knew another UCer had used the same place w/o problem. The form did say something about signing affirming that you weren't using the u/s in place of 'regular prenatal care,' and they did want a doctor's name and phone number - I used my GP, b/c they don't actually call or anything, they just want it on there. If I hadn't used her, I would have written down my chiro.

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#13 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 12:31 AM
 
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I had an ultrasound with ds2. I just asked my gp to request one for me because I was 'between obs'.

I think I'll probably have one this time, too. I'm having a really hard time making up my mind, though.

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#14 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 12:51 AM
 
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I knew that I didn't NEED the U/s, and also that the the likelyhood of a good outcome isn't increased by an ultrasound, but no matter how I tried to look at it, I felt more comfortable UCing knowing that I had a healthy fully formed baby of healthy weight and with no gross abnormalities. I had 2 U/S with the UP/UC, and it was worth the stress it relieved. I probably wouldn't do it next time, but I wouldn't rule it out.

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#15 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 01:19 AM
 
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With DD1 I had one ultrasound, last time I didn't do one. This time around DH has agreed to a UP/UC if I get an ultrasound at 20 weeks. Part of me still would rather not, partly because I don't know how I can resist learning the gender if I'm already looking, but then part of me is ok with it.

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#16 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 10:32 AM
 
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I would have liked to this time but there is no independt places here. So it would be a lot of hoops to jump through to just get a peek at this LO! So I'm learning something new with this PG, that I really should just listen and hear what the babe and my body are saying to me. That I can see this one if I just sit still for a little bit! I think that maybe the U/S gave me a false sence of okness with the other two. It's still hard when everyone else is getting to see their babe and finding out gender.
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#17 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 04:20 PM
 
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I struggled with this last time and didn't really decide not to get ultrasound but I did not end up getting one. I kind of just didn't want to bother with having the midwife set it up ect. I wouldn't have found out the sex anyway and in hindsight I had a small placenta (my midwife said it was the only small placenta she'd seen that was actually really healthy) and I wonder if that would have caused concerns if I'd gotten an unltrasound (and thus causing me a lot of stress/worry ect).

If I ever get pregnant again I will most likely opt for a 20 week unltrasound.

Anyway, I see nothing wrong with getting an ultrasound later in pregnancy if it will give you some peace of mind.

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#18 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 04:26 PM
 
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Peony, with my first we didn't find out the sex and I just told the person doing the ultrasound we didn't want to know and she was careful not to give a clear view. I think they usually ask you if you want to know.

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#19 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 06:29 PM
 
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I did not want one with my UC baby (a year today! ) but Dh did and since he was the one on the fence with our plans I went ahead. I did have to sign a permission slip but I think it was because this was a "for fun" type place. They advertise making it a family thing...an extra for when all the relatives are in town type thing. I needed a midwife to sign so I did it myself. I used my middle name and maiden name and one of our office lines as the contact number. The guy didn't even question it. I went around 25ish weeks, one reason being Dh wanted to know gender.

On the off chance we have anymore, we'll likely do that again.

My personal definition (for lack of a better word) is being knowledable and utilizing whatever means neccessary to feel confident and prepared. If that means getting ultrasounds every other week than so be it. If it means birthing on the moon than so be it. Just because you UC doesn't mean you have to eschew all medical options. If an u/s is what it's going to take to make you at ease go ahead! I personally feel the risks of not being prepared and confident in yourself outweigh the risks of a quickie ultrasound. An ultrasound MIGHT affect the baby (odd little stat...moms who receive more ultrasounds during pregnancy show a higher incidence of left handed babies) but not being confident in yourself (at the least....not being prepared at the worst) can lead to a bigger problem yk?

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#20 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 06:59 PM
 
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I actually feel that having an ultrasound would undermine my confidence in my body's abilities, not reassure it. In the past, ultrasounds have only confirmed exactly what I already knew through instinct -- yet I wouldn't trust my instinct until I saw that "proof." This time, I am just listening to what my body tells me instead of looking to external answers, and I feel SO much more confident and less worried.

I feel lucky that my husband doesn't dictate terms for our UCs. He feels if he trusts me enough to make the decision to UC, he trusts me enough to make the decisions about what, if any, external care to seek.
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#21 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 10:14 PM
 
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I feel lucky that my husband doesn't dictate terms for our UCs. He feels if he trusts me enough to make the decision to UC, he trusts me enough to make the decisions about what, if any, external care to seek.
Ok while I understand you aren't trying to be snarky with that it is somewhat snarky. My husband didn't dictate the terms of our UC. I'm sure the DH's of other posters don't either. What my husband DID do was come to me and say, "Hey babe, I'm not entirely comfy with the idea (especially after the birth of our first). I'm set to back you up regardless but I would feel more at ease if you would get an u/s." Due to the fact that we are a team and I don't think my instinct (which said everything was kosher) trumps his personal feelings about an upcoming birth. I would rather take his feelings into consideration and do something I'm not against than say "buck up" and deal with a mopey/frightened person come the time of birth.


Just because he's not the one giving birth doesn't mean he doesn't get to voice his desires. Just because I'm the one giving birth doesn't mean I have to deny him a resolution.

It's easy to say you trust your instinct. It's easy to have a spouse say they trust your instinct. It's not easy to have that and the necessary faith in that trust at all times.

UCing is very personal and as a result each person's "definition" of what qualifies as UC is going to be different. I think using whatever you need to to make yourself comfy AND safe is what UCing is all about. Personal empowerment. Knowing it's in your control. Seeking treatment when and where ever you want. That's what it's all about. To me at least.

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#22 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 11:19 PM
 
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Ok while I understand you aren't trying to be snarky with that it is somewhat snarky. My husband didn't dictate the terms of our UC. I'm sure the DH's of other posters don't either. What my husband DID do was come to me and say, "Hey babe, I'm not entirely comfy with the idea (especially after the birth of our first). I'm set to back you up regardless but I would feel more at ease if you would get an u/s." Due to the fact that we are a team and I don't think my instinct (which said everything was kosher) trumps his personal feelings about an upcoming birth. I would rather take his feelings into consideration and do something I'm not against than say "buck up" and deal with a mopey/frightened person come the time of birth.


Just because he's not the one giving birth doesn't mean he doesn't get to voice his desires. Just because I'm the one giving birth doesn't mean I have to deny him a resolution.

It's easy to say you trust your instinct. It's easy to have a spouse say they trust your instinct. It's not easy to have that and the necessary faith in that trust at all times.

UCing is very personal and as a result each person's "definition" of what qualifies as UC is going to be different. I think using whatever you need to to make yourself comfy AND safe is what UCing is all about. Personal empowerment. Knowing it's in your control. Seeking treatment when and where ever you want. That's what it's all about. To me at least.
Yeah that. I got the same offended feeling when I read that post. I don't understand people that can claim to be at total peace with their birth when their partner (who yes, isn't giving birth, but gave YOU 1/2 of that baby) is miserable and fighting them on their choices. I'm so glad DH trusts me enough to know that I will listen to his fears and desires as well as my own.

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#23 of 39 Old 08-23-2008, 11:52 PM
 
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Maybe I've just been preggo too long and I'm going crazy but this whole atmosphere of danger is really getting on my nerves. And I come from a "granola" family of homeopathy, vegetarian diet, etc!

It just seems that no matter what a preggo woman does, she is going to disable her kid. And it's never even a reasonable amount of damage or lowering of future development. It's always a terrible, horrible result, as if eating too many cookies will cause her kid to have hands without fingers.

Now, after all the reading I've done on U/S, I actually find myself in the camp of accepting they could have some negative result/danger. But I can't honestly believe that I should worry about 5 minutes of U/S amidst all the other "dangers."

How many mommies don't eat wholesome foods? How many mommies get less than 8hrs of a sleep a night? Are deficient in minerals and vitamins? Use makeups, skin creams, acne treatments? Take medication during pregnancy? Drive without a seatbelt? Work in a stressful environment? Use toxic chemicals to clean the kitchen and bathroom?

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#24 of 39 Old 08-24-2008, 12:49 PM
 
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Ok while I understand you aren't trying to be snarky with that it is somewhat snarky. My husband didn't dictate the terms of our UC. I'm sure the DH's of other posters don't either. What my husband DID do was come to me and say, "Hey babe, I'm not entirely comfy with the idea (especially after the birth of our first). I'm set to back you up regardless but I would feel more at ease if you would get an u/s." Due to the fact that we are a team and I don't think my instinct (which said everything was kosher) trumps his personal feelings about an upcoming birth. I would rather take his feelings into consideration and do something I'm not against than say "buck up" and deal with a mopey/frightened person come the time of birth.


Just because he's not the one giving birth doesn't mean he doesn't get to voice his desires. Just because I'm the one giving birth doesn't mean I have to deny him a resolution.

It's easy to say you trust your instinct. It's easy to have a spouse say they trust your instinct. It's not easy to have that and the necessary faith in that trust at all times.

UCing is very personal and as a result each person's "definition" of what qualifies as UC is going to be different. I think using whatever you need to to make yourself comfy AND safe is what UCing is all about. Personal empowerment. Knowing it's in your control. Seeking treatment when and where ever you want. That's what it's all about. To me at least.
Some of the commenters were saying their DH "required" or they "had to" do it in order for them to UC. I just can't imagine my husband "requiring" I do anything. It's one thing for your partner to make requests or talk about what would make his comfortable, but that's not the language some of these mamas are using.

I have no problem with people getting u/s during pregnancy if that's what they want. I don't have a problem with them doing it to put their partner's mind at ease. I don't like the wording that indicates their husbands are pressuring or manipulating them into doing something they don't want to do.
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#25 of 39 Old 08-24-2008, 01:03 PM
 
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Some of the commenters were saying their DH "required" or they "had to" do it in order for them to UC. I just can't imagine my husband "requiring" I do anything. It's one thing for your partner to make requests or talk about what would make his comfortable, but that's not the language some of these mamas are using.

I have no problem with people getting u/s during pregnancy if that's what they want. I don't have a problem with them doing it to put their partner's mind at ease. I don't like the wording that indicates their husbands are pressuring or manipulating them into doing something they don't want to do.
Yes, this. I got an ultrasound. My husband and I decided we'd like one. I have no issue with that or with other people deciding together, similarly. However, "required" and "allowed" makes it sound pretty heavy-handed. It made me cringe, frankly.

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#26 of 39 Old 08-24-2008, 01:15 PM
 
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Yes, this. I got an ultrasound. My husband and I decided we'd like one. I have no issue with that or with other people deciding together, similarly. However, "required" and "allowed" makes it sound pretty heavy-handed. It made me cringe, frankly.
I think a big thing for me is that I chose to UP and UC because I didn't want someone telling me what I "had" to do. My husband and I spent a *lot* of time talking every aspect of UP/UC over, but in the end, he respects that it's my body and the decisions regarding the type of care I have are my choice.

He never set any stipulations or made requirements of me, which was hugely important to me, because that's exactly what my care providers had been doing in prior pregnancies. Tests and procedures were always presented as requirements, something I "had" to do. That's a major reason why I chose UC/UP! The only person "telling" me what to do is my baby.
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#27 of 39 Old 08-24-2008, 05:27 PM
 
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Well, being one of those that used the word required, what I meant was that it was what DH needed to feel comfortable. (Therefore it was required for his comfort, but that doesn't mean it was required of me.) But like I said in my last post, I can't imagine not talking his feelings into consideration over the birth of OUR child.

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#28 of 39 Old 08-24-2008, 09:38 PM
 
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some places are a doc and they will do a full anatomical one if youd like. costs ~400 bucks from what ive seen, though.
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#29 of 39 Old 08-25-2008, 12:36 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Moonprysm View Post
Well, being one of those that used the word required, what I meant was that it was what DH needed to feel comfortable. (Therefore it was required for his comfort, but that doesn't mean it was required of me.) But like I said in my last post, I can't imagine not talking his feelings into consideration over the birth of OUR child.
Exactly. I've put my foot down on a lot of things, our children have not been vaxed even after DD2 contracted pertussis as a newborn and was gravely ill for many months (she was exposed at birth and still suffers lingering effects), I had a homebirth with DD2 35 miles from a hospital, etc... There are times when its worth it to me for fight for certain things and other times when it's not. A ultrasound to make DH more comfortable with a UC/UP is not high on my list of things to have a battle over. I've had pregnancies with no ultrasounds, and been fine with that as well. The difference to me is that DH is someone I have to live with and who will be during the birth of this child, I don't want to be birthing and dealing with his anxiety of the unknown, if an ultrasound will make him more uncomfortable and therefore make me more comfortable living with him, then I will do it. If it was something that I felt very strongly about then no I wouldn't be doing it.

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#30 of 39 Old 08-25-2008, 01:01 PM
 
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Originally Posted by claddaghmom View Post
Maybe I've just been preggo too long and I'm going crazy but this whole atmosphere of danger is really getting on my nerves. And I come from a "granola" family of homeopathy, vegetarian diet, etc!

It just seems that no matter what a preggo woman does, she is going to disable her kid. And it's never even a reasonable amount of damage or lowering of future development. It's always a terrible, horrible result, as if eating too many cookies will cause her kid to have hands without fingers.

Now, after all the reading I've done on U/S, I actually find myself in the camp of accepting they could have some negative result/danger. But I can't honestly believe that I should worry about 5 minutes of U/S amidst all the other "dangers."

How many mommies don't eat wholesome foods? How many mommies get less than 8hrs of a sleep a night? Are deficient in minerals and vitamins? Use makeups, skin creams, acne treatments? Take medication during pregnancy? Drive without a seatbelt? Work in a stressful environment? Use toxic chemicals to clean the kitchen and bathroom?
I know I did a lot of stuff I shouldn't have while I was pregnant!

After my first trimester I drank two cups of coffee the three days/wk I was at work, and I used an astringent with salicyclic acid in it to combat acne on my cheeks.

I my job as a nurse is very stressful, we use lots of drugs, some which shouldn't be handled by pregnant women. I Had to fight not to be forced to administer chemotherapy while ttc. I was given patients with radiation implants and one with CMV disease which can cause birth defects if a preg women contracts it.

I ate tunafish which contains mercury, and ingested way too many sugary treats.

I spent too much time on the computer.

I had two ultrasounds, including one at 5 weeks! to confirm the pregnancy (kind of regret that one, but I didn't know better).

I drank at least two alcoholic beverages before I knew I was pg.

I painted my toenails (once)

I sprayed out the bathtub with tilex while I was in labor. One of my patients told me a story about how she got a blood infection from a dirty birth pool and almost died and I've had a phobia about it since.

And believe me if he ever has any problems I will only blame myself!

 nak.gif Mommy to fencing.gifKai 2/03, hammer.gifCaden 1/08, energy.gif Kara 10/09, angel1.gif 3/21/13, &

rainbow1284.gif baby.gif  Cole 2/3/14 ♡ Happily unmarried to geek.gif Papa since 2002 ♡

~We may not have it all together  but together we have it all~ uc.jpgsaynovax.gifgoorganic.jpgintactivist.giflactivist.gif 

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