Birth Story of baby Adam - Mothering Forums

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Old 09-12-2008, 09:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Our Birth Story

Adam Jospeh Huntley was born at 4:29 am on Thursday September 11, 2008 at Phoenix Indian Medical Center. He was 8 pounds and 5.4 ounces and 20.8 inches long. He has a full head of black hair.

Labor began on Monday Sept 8. The contractions were easy to handle and took little concentration. They were 5 mins apart until lunch time. I was given break to make Daniel lunch. Contraction picked back up until Tuesday morning. I was given another break. The pains came again at 4 pm on Tuesday and were hard to handle. I knew work was beginning. The contractions remained 5 minutes apart. I tries all the positions I knew of. I moaned and hummed through them. At 11:00 I got into the birth tub. It was immediate relief. Labor continued in earnest. At 2am we went to the doctor. Labor was going on for a long time and we wanted to know how everything was. Baby was doing fine and but I was only 2 cm. This was all pre-labor. I was given medicine to sleep and went back home. At 4 am on Wednesday Daniel and I got out first real sleep since labor began. At 4 pm the contractions hit me hard. We just knew that this was active labor. I labored hard at home for nealy 12 hours. I moaned and hummed through the pains but nothing seemed to help. I was exhausted but we stuck to it. I was all over the house squatting, lunging, and rocking back and forth. I almost HAD to be vocal. This was indeed very hard and very painful. At around midnight things really got hard for me. We did not want to get in the water for fear of labor stalling. So I went through another hour while Daniel got the pool ready. By this time I was sweating and there was no way I could even see through the contractions. I had no idea it would this painful I was scared and I showed it. My mom was here with us and she could not handle it. She was constantly in the background being negative while Daniel struggled to keep me on track.

BY this time I was done. I was so scared and so distracted that I could not embrace the pain. I could not relax through the contractions. I felt like a failure. At that point I got into the water. Again the relief was unbelievable! I cannot begin to describe how much it meant to me. Not even 15 mins later my water broke. The next contraction was through the roof. I was crying and screaming through it. I was acting the way I swore I wouldn’t. I really wanted to run out of my body. All the preparation and practice Daniel and I did didn’t help me. I just couldn’t focus. My mom threatened to call the police and Daniel and her began to fight. She was sooo negative that he threw her out. Daniel continued to work so hard to coach me but I just couldn’t do what he said. I got out of the pool and started to bleed. I got even more scared. Daniel began to get scared also. The blood kept coming and we had no idea if it was normal. I just knew that there was no way I could give birth. I was in transition and didn’t even know it. I asked Daniel to call his mom and we went to the hospital.

We got there at 3:43. There was no time to get triaged. I was already pushing in the car. At 4:29 he was born. I think back and I only pushed for about an hour at the most. It was very short.

We wanted an unassisted childbirth. I could have had the baby at home in the water…I was only minutes away! But I think that I did not face all my fears ahead of time. I don’t think I prepared enough mentally for the challenge and I think my faith waivered. Daniel however did have faith and was amazing. I didn’t beleuive in myself. I am a little ashamed of that, but I know I did what I felt I had to. When I got to the hospital I didn’t go thinking about medication or pain relief I think I just needed some more help some more positive support. The midwife there coached me with Daniel and I just felt safer being there. I had no medical intervention with my birth. No ivs and no drugs. No episiotomy and I was able to push how and when I wanted. I birthed the placenta on my own. I got to hold and try to feed my baby right after birth. It was truly amazing. But the fear still gripped me throughout that.

I can say that I had the birth experience I wanted, with the exception of my faith in myself. Daniel is truly the most wonderful husband. He was there from the very 1st contraction until the birth. I don’t know any other man that can compare to his love and compassion. What a miracle!!!!

Well that’s the story. Baby did have trouble breathing for a few hours after birth. But hes ok now. I had no bleeding or no problems. I did get a small tear on my inner labia and a deep abrasion inside that needed 2 stitches. But my perineum outside didn’t tear at all. I owe that to the water and the care the midwife applied.
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Old 09-12-2008, 09:32 PM
 
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You are a goddess, mama!
And you did what you needed to get the positive support you needed. Never be ashamed of that

I heard somewhere that women in our culture are never tested physically until they give birth. And it can be completely overwhelming. I'm so happy you were treated with respect at the hospital, and so proud of you for following your own instincts!

---feeling like an emu on acid---
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Old 09-12-2008, 09:40 PM
 
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You are truly amazing. I can't tell you how much admiration I have for you. Don't be hard on yourself! Look how long you bravely went on with all the negativity you were dealing with. Wow! I only hope I can have half the strength you did when my turn is up.

And congratulations on your new little boy!

:ball oons
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Old 09-13-2008, 02:12 AM
 
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: Congratulations!!! You did so well and how wonderful that you got such a supportive midwife at the hospital.

I love his name!

Missionary, birth-worker, midwifery student
Mama to love.gif DD (9yr), DS luxlove.gif (3yr), & 2twins.gif UC twin DDs (5yr)

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Old 09-13-2008, 06:51 AM
 
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Congratulations!!! You did great, don't think otherwise for a second!

In retrospect the view is always different. But when you're in the moment, especially with all that stuff going on with your mom, it's totally understandable that you needed that bit of extra support. And that you were able to give birth your way in the hospital is not the norm, so I would say that God was looking out for you there!

So much to be thankful for--enjoy your new family!!

:
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Old 09-13-2008, 10:48 AM
 
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congrats momma! It sounds like you had a wonderful birth!!!! yAAAAYY!!! Beautiful name, and it sounds like you have an amazing husband! My mother wasn't supportive either and fought with my hubby so big hugs to you on that end....that was the hardest thing for me to deal with during MY special time!!!

Lee Ann ~ SAHM to Carolina(4)uc.jpg, Aurora (2)uc.jpg, and belly.gifwith #3 - due in December!
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Old 09-13-2008, 11:19 AM
 
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: Congratulations! You did wonderful, Mama! I'm so happy all turned out well! Happy Babymooning! :
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Old 09-13-2008, 05:38 PM
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thanks for sharing your story. it is really amazing!

and i'm glad that you had a good, safe birth, ultimately. i'm sorry for the negativity that your endured during labor, and i hope that you know that you have nothing to be ashamed of!
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Old 09-13-2008, 06:35 PM
 
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congratulations!
You are amazing and strong! I can only hope that I have your strength when I give birth. (Especially because of all the negativity from mom, I hope you can make peace with that soon....). You have a beautiful baby boy!
:::::::::: ::::
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Old 09-13-2008, 06:49 PM
 
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congratulations to you and your new trio of a family! You did amazing with all those circumstances!
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Old 09-14-2008, 12:32 AM
 
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congratulations!!!

By reading this signature, you agree to join my cult :nana
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Old 09-14-2008, 01:46 AM
 
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: Congratulations and welcome to baby Adam!

I'm really sorry your mother was such a hinderance, and that you weren't able to focus the way you wanted/needed to but so happy that you still had a beautiful, triumphant birth! Enjoy this time with your little one!

Grateful midwife and peaceful mama to 3 wonderful children: dd10, dd8 and ds5
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Old 09-14-2008, 01:46 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newclementine View Post
congratulations!
You are amazing and strong! I can only hope that I have your strength when I give birth. (Especially because of all the negativity from mom, I hope you can make peace with that soon....). You have a beautiful baby boy!
:::::::::: ::::
thanks! i think the most important thing for anyone would be to only have people there that will support you completely. I knew my mom was scared and I knew ahead of time that she may act crazy. But I was so scared that I asked her to come anyway. I guess just choose your support very carefully and maybe make a choice with your husband to remove any negativity if it occurs.

i feel good about the birth. i know so much about myself now...as a woman. i feel that I have grown in the best way possible. I am very eager to have a even better experience.

yeah I was amazed at the midwives care and attention. i know that i was very lucky. she listed to my wishes and for whatever reason helped me go against the norm. Gods hand was there.

the nurses and docs were truly amazed at how much we knew...i think the fact that we were educated gave them more respect for us.
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Old 09-14-2008, 01:47 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rhoneyes View Post
thanks! i think the most important thing for anyone would be to only have people there that will support you completely. I knew my mom was scared and I knew ahead of time that she may act crazy. But I was so scared that I asked her to come anyway. I guess just choose your support very carefully and maybe make a choice with your husband to remove any negativity if it occurs.

i feel good about the birth. i know so much about myself now...as a woman. i feel that I have grown in the best way possible. I am very eager to have a even better experience.

yeah I was amazed at the midwives care and attention. i know that i was very lucky. she listed to my wishes and for whatever reason helped me go against the norm. Gods hand was there.

the nurses and docs were truly amazed at how much we knew...i think the fact that we were educated gave them more respect for us.
You are amazing, mama! Your experience offers so many lessons!

Grateful midwife and peaceful mama to 3 wonderful children: dd10, dd8 and ds5
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Old 09-14-2008, 10:11 AM
 
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You are truly an inspiration! :

+ = and .
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Old 09-19-2008, 01:54 PM
 
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Congratulations!!


I can't imagine how much worse it would be to have someone so negative make the transfer decision for you with threats.
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Old 10-10-2008, 05:20 PM
 
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You did a great job and shouldn't be ashamed at all! I think you would have done it if grandma wasn't there, you definately didn't need that and it did you no good. But depending on the degree of the breathing problems it might have been a good thing you were. You did exactly what you were supposed to do, #1 your best, #2 know when you needed help. You inspire me!
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Old 10-11-2008, 09:30 PM
 
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congratulations! adam is a sweet name. don't beat yourself up. don't feel ashamed of how you felt in labor- it's VERY trying. we always learn so much from our first births- it's all a gift for the following one(s).

as a midwife, i saw many situations where the birthing mother's mother was there for the birth and it was usually not positive. people are often different around birth than you'd expect...especially mothers! i'm sort of glad mine never made it...she's supportive from the phone but maybe not in the same room. she watched the birth video from bjorn's birth and cringed and kept saying "oh, god, jenny, it's awful"...she said it was just too awful to watch me, her baby, in seemingly so much pain. understandable.

JENNY, 38~ preschool teacher, birth activist, sun worshiper, singer, married for 17 years and mom to

Karan 15, Fiona 12, Bodhi 10, Bjorn 6, Devon 3, and Robin Taylor born January 16th!

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Old 10-12-2008, 12:57 AM
 
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Congratulations!

I agree, you did a great job. Who knows what would have happened had you not gone in to the hospital when you started seeing blood. I say it was a good decision on your part if the experience went beyond your comfort zone and what you were prepared to handle on your own. And it's great that you got good support there! I totally used the hospital to my advantage for my first birth - my mom was in town and her presence stressed me out SO MUCH. When things got intense we stopped 'updating' her on the progress and she had to sit and wait for about 5 hours with no info and the nurses were great about keeping her out of my space.

Mom to DD ('06) and DS ('08)
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Old 10-13-2008, 11:47 AM
 
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: Congratulations!! :

You did a wonderful job. You did what you needed to do to get the baby here safely and that is all anyone can do.
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Old 10-13-2008, 11:54 AM
 
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Congrats - when it comes down to it, you do what you gotta do.
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Old 10-13-2008, 01:54 PM
 
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congratulations Don't feel bad about transferring- there's homebirth, and then there's UC. You needed the support of a nurturing, motherly midwife, and that is what you got, and now you have a baby too IME most midwives come through for mothers when they're needed most.

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.
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