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#121 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 05:57 PM
 
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www.unfi.com

The Marshall's thing was just a fluke, I bought it just before Xmas and haven't seen one since! They are always rotating stuff through there.
I looked into unfi but the group near me wasn't very friendly and open. And they have a $10/month fee, regardless of whether or not you order stuff. Since our "diet" is still in flux I wasn't about to commit to having to buy.

How is the group you work with? What part of the state are they in? I've heard Azure Standard is slowly making it's way across the country.


KATHY - how are the coconut aminos? Is it a good sub for soy sauce? Or just weird?

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#122 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I looked into unfi but the group near me wasn't very friendly and open. And they have a $10/month fee, regardless of whether or not you order stuff. Since our "diet" is still in flux I wasn't about to commit to having to buy.
i think my co-op is unfi (and hummingbird and something else and knee deep cattle). I just wrote to the chairwoman asking for online catalogue info for myself. thanks for the reminder. Our fee atm is $25/year

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#123 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:03 PM
 
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First time doing multi quote!! I really had no idea this worked this way.

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no. I am basically told that I'm an adult and should be able to control my feelings and take responsibility for them regardless of other people's actions.
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well I think they are asking you to be a saint. This really upsets me. I am not seeing equal responsibility for both of you.
Exactly. Having been through it there needs to be awareness and responsibility on both sides. I think it's much too facile for a therapist to say "just control your feelings" without acknowledging there are real issues to why the woman is getting so angry and just feeling so helplessly frustrated after trying every other possible route! (At least that is what I was feeling when I yelled.)

Yes, yelling is not behaving appropriately, but humans just plain get angry sometimes. And the couple needs to realize that working together will help head it off. Our second therapist was wonderful, but as I said, too late. And I knew the first one was horrible after she made the emasculating/wounded bird comment (I have a hard time letting go of this) early on but I was too passive, feeling bad about myself, and wanting to cooperate to make a change so soon.
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#124 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:09 PM
 
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After 20 minutes of this, I got up and screamed at DH "OK I'M EFFING UP. THANKS FOR THE EFFING NAP." Have I mentioned I hate myself? We have counselling tomorrow. The counsellor always asks if I've been asking for my needs to be met and the answer has been consistently "yes". The next question is "Are you remembering not to yell?" That's always been a no and then we talk about how I need to not yell and blah blah blah. I suck.
I'd have done the same thing but I wouldn't have sworn (because of the kids; pre-kids I was worse than a sailor). I mean, c'mon. You wouldn't have asked him to take care of the kids if you didn't REALLY need a nap. It doesn't seem like too much to ask to me. Be gentle on yourself. Sometimes we need to yell a little. I've been bad yesterday and today. It's like I can't help myself (oats, oats, oats) and DS is annoying me. Going "What?" every.time.I.say.anything. So I repeat it again. And he says "What?" in a clueless sort of way. So then I talk really loudly and slowly like he's a moron. Which is horrible. But it's like he's not firing on all cylinders for some reason. Maybe it's the oats for him too. Okay. I'm chucking the oats.

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KATHY - how are the coconut aminos? Is it a good sub for soy sauce? Or just weird?
I think they're really good. I've used them on stir fry and fried rice. I thought it tasted as close to soy sauce as I'm going to get.

Kathy, mother of 3, wife of 1. My new recipe blog: www.kathysrecipebox.wordpress.com (no longer searchable by allergen, but at least it doesn't have a virus!)
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#125 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:09 PM
 
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How is the group you work with? What part of the state are they in? I've heard Azure Standard is slowly making it's way across the country.
They are good but it was a pain saying every month I couldn't do the splits b/c we couldn't eat the food they picked. Everyone had a "right" to choose a case of something and every member was supposed to get one package to try if possible. Then they changed our pick up to Sunday and that was a total pain. It also got so the yearly/monthly fees weren't worth it b/c I started needing things they didn't carry. It was $36 year and $3 month in fees.

Our Ped orders from somebody $350 or $250 at a time and gets it shipped to her house... I forget the name, I should ask again.

There's an UNFI in my town and one in Hopkinton that I know of. I think there are a lot of coops around the state. You can also order a large amount and pick up at their warehouse just over border in NH?
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#126 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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First time doing multi quote!! I really had no idea this worked this way.
Exactly. Having been through it there needs to be awareness and responsibility on both sides. I think it's much too facile for a therapist to say "just control your feelings" without acknowledging there are real issues to why the woman is getting so angry and just feeling so helplessly frustrated after trying every other possible route! (At least that is what I was feeling when I yelled.)

Yes, yelling is not behaving appropriately, but humans just plain get angry sometimes. And the couple needs to realize that working together will help head it off. Our second therapist was wonderful, but as I said, too late. And I knew the first one was horrible after she made the emasculating/wounded bird comment (I have a hard time letting go of this) early on but I was too passive, feeling bad about myself, and wanting to cooperate to make a change so soon.
for multiquote.
Yep, that's where I was/am. I'm presently trying to figure out how to be more assertive. Hah. *sigh* I always seem to over-shoot though. It would just be nice if he'd use a little common sense sometimes like... if I say "Can you stop him?" when the 2 year old is climbing something instead of asking "What would you like me to do?" maybe... oh, I dunno. Taking him down?! Men can be so dense, I swear, though I have to wonder sometimes how much of it is purposeful.
And I'd be ticked about that too, btw.

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#127 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:16 PM
 
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You seem reasonable to me. But hopefully healing will lead you to a better person in the future.
OMG... I so have more work to do b/c I first read this as "will lead you to BE a better person in the future" ...if my first post quoting it didn't give you a clue!!

Oy vey mama.

I'm over most of it but it still sucks BHMC sometimes.

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#128 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:19 PM
 
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Men can be so dense, I swear, though I have to wonder sometimes how much of it is purposeful.
I've been thinking a lot about this with respect to raising my son. To teach him to care for himself and care for others.

I tend to take care of a lot around me b/c I'm an older sister, a know it all, and very generous and helpful as my nature. It's hard to know when to step back sometimes with DS.
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#129 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:21 PM
 
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Ok, that was a half a thought... I meant also to say that I think how they are raised as a boy/man has a lot to do with these kinds of behaviors. My son has literally parroted his father in expecting me to do things and I definately want to nip that one in the bud!
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#130 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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What does BHMC stand for?

Yeah, I keep telling DS1 that I expect he will help his partner if he chooses to get married and/or have children. He keeps saying he's not getting married. Kind of funny, bc apparently that's what DH used to say before he met me.
DS1 helps around the house. A LOT. WAY more than DH.

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#131 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'd have done the same thing but I wouldn't have sworn (because of the kids; pre-kids I was worse than a sailor). I mean, c'mon. You wouldn't have asked him to take care of the kids if you didn't REALLY need a nap. It doesn't seem like too much to ask to me. Be gentle on yourself. Sometimes we need to yell a little. I've been bad yesterday and today. It's like I can't help myself (oats, oats, oats) and DS is annoying me. Going "What?" every.time.I.say.anything. So I repeat it again. And he says "What?" in a clueless sort of way. So then I talk really loudly and slowly like he's a moron. Which is horrible. But it's like he's not firing on all cylinders for some reason. Maybe it's the oats for him too. Okay. I'm chucking the oats.
I've been trying so hard to get rid of the gluten! Then I find crackers. When I'm hungry. Hence my thread asking for easy snack and lunch ideas.

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#132 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:37 PM
 
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I'd have done the same thing but I wouldn't have sworn (because of the kids; pre-kids I was worse than a sailor). I mean, c'mon. You wouldn't have asked him to take care of the kids if you didn't REALLY need a nap. It doesn't seem like too much to ask to me. Be gentle on yourself. Sometimes we need to yell a little. I've been bad yesterday and today. It's like I can't help myself (oats, oats, oats) and DS is annoying me. Going "What?" every.time.I.say.anything. So I repeat it again. And he says "What?" in a clueless sort of way. So then I talk really loudly and slowly like he's a moron. Which is horrible. But it's like he's not firing on all cylinders for some reason. Maybe it's the oats for him too. Okay. I'm chucking the oats.

The "what" thing is soooo annoying"

I think they're really good. I've used them on stir fry and fried rice. I thought it tasted as close to soy sauce as I'm going to get.
So what brand did you get? Might have to buy online.

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#133 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:40 PM - Thread Starter
 
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The "what" thing is soooo annoying"

I forgot to say... That might be a food issue? Hmmm....

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#134 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 06:41 PM
 
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Nessa, the research I'm doing right now might be relevant for you - look at vitamin K. DS has been having awful reactions to calcium lately, and I *think* what is going on is that I've been supping A&D this winter to help our immune systems, and perhaps he's ended up deficient in vite K (or maybe he just doesn't use it very well). I figured he would be OK on that because we eat lots of homemade butter from raw milk, and pastured eggs. But after reading yesterday, I gave him butter oil, and it was AMAZING. Instant results (like within a couple of hours. Vitamin K helps with using calcium properly, and there's a relationship to oxalates in there too, although I can't remember what it is right now. There's a vitamin K yahoo group, their files section has a ton of stuff you might find useful to read.

ETA: Holy cow, I missed two pages of chat in the time it took to write this!! Crazy day...

So, more on our story - happened during the Olympics, when I wasn't posting much. Over the past 6 weeks, DH (oops, LOL - DS!) has been getting more wild and stimmy, losing language and efforts to communicate, lots of scary stuff. Lots of contributing factors, I think - high phenol yeast killers, FOS, d-lactate probiotics. But after getting all that under control, I was still seeing problems. Almost like low mag symptoms - but how the heck could he still be low mag? So I tried GFDF (you know how desperate I was to try that). A little better off dairy, gluten made no difference. But, dairy was OK if chased with mag. And ME consuming dairy was no problem. So not a food reaction to gluten/dairy (which when this is over, is probably really exciting news). The thing is, he's at mag bowel tolerance, and taking Epsom salts baths - so I couldn't just keep increasing his mag. I decided calcium must be the problem - it's an excitotoxin if it doesn't get stored properly in bones, and ends up in the soft tissues instead. We had this issue a bit way back, but then it was low mag. So, read more about calcium channel cofactors - and stumbled on the vitamin K stuff. Instant calm. I haven't seen him this relaxed in weeks. Oh - and he SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT last night. First time EVER (and he'll be 3 in a couple of weeks). Oh please, let this be the key!

Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win. ~Jonathan Kozel
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#135 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 07:17 PM
 
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So, more on our story - happened during the Olympics, when I wasn't posting much. Over the past 6 weeks, DH has been getting more wild and stimmy, losing language and efforts to communicate, lots of scary stuff. Lots of contributing factors, I think - high phenol yeast killers, FOS, d-lactate probiotics. But after getting all that under control, I was still seeing problems. Almost like low mag symptoms - but how the heck could he still be low mag? So I tried GFDF (you know how desperate I was to try that). A little better off dairy, gluten made no difference. But, dairy was OK if chased with mag. And ME consuming dairy was no problem. So not a food reaction to gluten/dairy (which when this is over, is probably really exciting news). The thing is, he's at mag bowel tolerance, and taking Epsom salts baths - so I couldn't just keep increasing his mag. I decided calcium must be the problem - it's an excitotoxin if it doesn't get stored properly in bones, and ends up in the soft tissues instead. We had this issue a bit way back, but then it was low mag. So, read more about calcium channel cofactors - and stumbled on the vitamin K stuff. Instant calm. I haven't seen him this relaxed in weeks. Oh - and he SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT last night. First time EVER (and he'll be 3 in a couple of weeks). Oh please, let this be the key!
Great! I am so happy you are finding some answers.

All of my problem solving is being sucked away by the new baby. You know in American Sign Language when wanting to say "pregnancy brain mush""' or something to that affect you sign "baby sucked out my brain" with a mouth sucking sound. ok that sounds gross. The sign starts at your forehead/front of head with an open hand and quickly moved down to your lower belly and with the hand closing at the same time. While doing this you make a sucking noise. Of course, if you are signing to Deaf people you don't have to make the noise, just the mouth movements. . . . I sometimes miss that part of my old world.

Children deserve the respect of puzzling it out.
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#136 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 07:24 PM
 
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I forgot to say... That might be a food issue? Hmmm....
Umm. I can't figure out what you were quoting. But it's almost always a food issue with us girls, isn't it?

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#137 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 07:27 PM
 
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Nessa, the research I'm doing right now might be relevant for you - look at vitamin K. DS has been having awful reactions to calcium lately, and I *think* what is going on is that I've been supping A&D this winter to help our immune systems, and perhaps he's ended up deficient in vite K (or maybe he just doesn't use it very well). I figured he would be OK on that because we eat lots of homemade butter from raw milk, and pastured eggs. But after reading yesterday, I gave him butter oil, and it was AMAZING. Instant results (like within a couple of hours. Vitamin K helps with using calcium properly, and there's a relationship to oxalates in there too, although I can't remember what it is right now. There's a vitamin K yahoo group, their files section has a ton of stuff you might find useful to read.

ETA: Holy cow, I missed two pages of chat in the time it took to write this!! Crazy day...

So, more on our story - happened during the Olympics, when I wasn't posting much. Over the past 6 weeks, DH has been getting more wild and stimmy, losing language and efforts to communicate, lots of scary stuff. Lots of contributing factors, I think - high phenol yeast killers, FOS, d-lactate probiotics. But after getting all that under control, I was still seeing problems. Almost like low mag symptoms - but how the heck could he still be low mag? So I tried GFDF (you know how desperate I was to try that). A little better off dairy, gluten made no difference. But, dairy was OK if chased with mag. And ME consuming dairy was no problem. So not a food reaction to gluten/dairy (which when this is over, is probably really exciting news). The thing is, he's at mag bowel tolerance, and taking Epsom salts baths - so I couldn't just keep increasing his mag. I decided calcium must be the problem - it's an excitotoxin if it doesn't get stored properly in bones, and ends up in the soft tissues instead. We had this issue a bit way back, but then it was low mag. So, read more about calcium channel cofactors - and stumbled on the vitamin K stuff. Instant calm. I haven't seen him this relaxed in weeks. Oh - and he SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT last night. First time EVER (and he'll be 3 in a couple of weeks). Oh please, let this be the key!
Huh. Vitamin k made him sleep through the night. Why can't these kids come with some kind of meter for us to read?

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#138 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 07:29 PM
 
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Mamafish, did you mean to say DS? I sat here thinking, "Oh, man, that's insane!" then realized you were talking about ds.

JR, I so need to pick up some epsom salts--I'll call dh--if he's still in town he can! Yay, dh is still in town. I can take a bath tonite.

DD1 is really angry right now--being sick I guess...she's not keeping much down, so not sure how to help her there.

caution: one-handed nak

typos likely

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#139 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 07:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Umm. I can't figure out what you were quoting. But it's almost always a food issue with us girls, isn't it?
Oops. Fixed it.

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#140 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 07:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Kathy,
I love the new name colour.

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#141 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 07:44 PM
 
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Kathy,
I love the new name colour.
good for you Kathy. I'm glad you can share your knowledge more

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#142 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 08:18 PM
 
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So what brand did you get? Might have to buy online.
The Coconut Aminos? I thought there was only one brand. I got it at a health food store, but I saw that Whole Foods had it as well. If you've got one of those near you.

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I forgot to say... That might be a food issue? Hmmm....
Which part is the food issue? The "what?", "what?", "what?" or the getting annoyed at it? Or both? I know the getting annoyed at is and I'm pretty sure the what, what is as well. And oats is what we all trialed so I'm pretty sure I know the culprit.

Get some rice cakes Jacq. They're just as quick to grab as a cracker.

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#143 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 08:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Which part is the food issue? The "what?", "what?", "what?" or the getting annoyed at it? Or both? I know the getting annoyed at is and I'm pretty sure the what, what is as well. And oats is what we all trialed so I'm pretty sure I know the culprit.

Get some rice cakes Jacq. They're just as quick to grab as a cracker.
"What what what?"

Rice cakes!

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#144 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 08:25 PM
 
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Holy crap you guys... I leave my house for a few hours, and have 4 pages to read when I get back!

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Yes, NO DRY D. It is the chemical form even if it is D3.
I was about to say , but then I looked up my Pure Encapsulation capsules of D3 and it says they are derived from lanolin.

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no. I am basically told that I'm an adult and should be able to control my feelings and take responsibility for them regardless of other people's actions.
Yes. You are supposed to be supermom, and super-saint, and super-human, and everyone else can just sit on their asses being completely unhelpful and unsupportive. That's ridiculous. I agree that yelling is probably not the best idea, but sometimes that's the only way someone will actually hear what you are saying, kwim?

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So, more on our story - happened during the Olympics, when I wasn't posting much. Over the past 6 weeks, DH has been getting more wild and stimmy, losing language and efforts to communicate, lots of scary stuff. Lots of contributing factors, I think - high phenol yeast killers, FOS, d-lactate probiotics. But after getting all that under control, I was still seeing problems. Almost like low mag symptoms - but how the heck could he still be low mag? So I tried GFDF (you know how desperate I was to try that). A little better off dairy, gluten made no difference. But, dairy was OK if chased with mag. And ME consuming dairy was no problem. So not a food reaction to gluten/dairy (which when this is over, is probably really exciting news). The thing is, he's at mag bowel tolerance, and taking Epsom salts baths - so I couldn't just keep increasing his mag. I decided calcium must be the problem - it's an excitotoxin if it doesn't get stored properly in bones, and ends up in the soft tissues instead. We had this issue a bit way back, but then it was low mag. So, read more about calcium channel cofactors - and stumbled on the vitamin K stuff. Instant calm. I haven't seen him this relaxed in weeks. Oh - and he SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT last night. First time EVER (and he'll be 3 in a couple of weeks). Oh please, let this be the key!
Deb- that is fantastic!! I really should go look into that more. After I stopped the calcium (and bananas, so really... could have been either), DD stopped her evening freak-out routine.

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#145 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 08:30 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Holy crap you guys... I leave my house for a few hours, and have 4 pages to read when I get back!
Erm. Half of it's quotes?

eta: Oh yeah and I somehow ripped my pyjama pants. In the front. Wth?!

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#146 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 08:52 PM
 
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Okay ,OT here: Being pregnant and having had hypothyroid signs in the past, how important do you feel it to be for me to get my bloodwork done? Reason is, I probably alsways had borderline hypo and all my kids are fine. We would like to not add any more med/prenatal expenses right now if possible. Any of you preggo mamas do it?
WhoMe, with your adrenal issues. did you? I'm worried that they'll want me on something and last time, it sent my adrenals to the basement. I'm already struggling adrenal-wise and don't want to make it worse esp in pregnancy. Advice? Thoughts?
My ND thinks I ought to, DH doesn't necessarily want to, and I'm unsure. (If you recall, it was taking thyroid meds that caused my panic attacks to begin, made me gain 10 lbs, and brought on high levels of anxiety and lowest levels of energy. THX. You guys are so great!

caution: one-handed nak

typos likely

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#147 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 08:54 PM
 
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I forgot to say... That might be a food issue? Hmmm....
It might be. But sometimes I think 6 year old girls just don't pay attention. Dreaming of fairies or something.

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#148 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 08:57 PM
 
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The Coconut Aminos? I thought there was only one brand. I got it at a health food store, but I saw that Whole Foods had it as well. If you've got one of those near you.

I do indeed have Whole Foods and I shop there like 6 times a week. So where at Whole Foods did you see them? Ethnic isle? Coconut Isle? Fridge section?


Which part is the food issue? The "what?", "what?", "what?" or the getting annoyed at it? Or both? I know the getting annoyed at is and I'm pretty sure the what, what is as well. And oats is what we all trialed so I'm pretty sure I know the culprit.

Get some rice cakes Jacq. They're just as quick to grab as a cracker.
What the heck are you girls talking about? What?

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#149 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 09:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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dannic, knowing what I do now, I would most likely run the test. bear in mind that i found out that my tsh (4.7) done way back when ds1 was 2 became abnormal when the new guidelines were implemented 3 months later and i had no idea.

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#150 of 1544 Old 03-03-2010, 09:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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What the heck are you girls talking about? What?
What?

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