the poop is the problem...... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 01-09-2004, 03:06 PM - Thread Starter
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hello I need some help my DD is 28 months and is potty learning.To all my friends and family she is way too late...she is so smart and her speaking is impressive they say she should HAVE BEEN OUT OF DIAPERS ALREADY...WHATEVER, MY ACTUAL QUESTION IS she seems to have no problem going #1 but when she has to #2 she will hold it and now her little buim is swollen and red my frustration she will however let me know she pooped by showing me her dirty fingers...: Pleases tell me how you helped your little ones use the potty and drop the #2 off......thanks alot love peacefulmom
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#2 of 10 Old 01-10-2004, 12:52 AM
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First, I'm lol at your Location comment in your sidebar.

My dd is a couple of months older than yours and is TOTALLY un-potty trained. She's just not ready yet. So personally, my advice would be to praise Lily for peeing in the potty and remind her that pooping in the potty is an option, but not really push it or stress over it. My mom always said that kid's rarely go to college without knowing how to go potty.

Will she poop in a diaper? Can she ask you for a diaper if she needs to poop? That might be a middle ground between her swollen bottom and dirty fingers.

Good luck to you!

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#3 of 10 Old 01-10-2004, 05:29 AM
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Mimi is 31 months. She is totally poop trained but not pee trained at all. How odd is that? Now she is going through the hell of a divorce and parental separation so we are cutting her all kinds of breaks here with zero pressure to train. She got into doing poop only by me just having her help me flush away her poops from the diaper into the toilet. Then we went on to catching her in the act of pooping and swooping her off to the potty to finish it up. We use a toddler insert and a stepstool so she can get up there and down again.

Now she asks for the potty when she feels a poop coming on and enjoys flushing it away. Still no movement on the pee thing yet but I swear that with everything else going on in our lives I just don't give

Good luck!

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#4 of 10 Old 01-10-2004, 11:55 AM
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Well, when i worked in daycares, i diapered MANY very big, very vocal four year olds. Kids who were utterly uninterested in the potty ( i think for a variety of reasons : ). So, too me, just past two years old seems a-ok. It has been my observation lately that most kids don't train til more like three years. THat's ok with me, too, as i looooove using cloth on her .
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#5 of 10 Old 01-10-2004, 04:02 PM - Thread Starter
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you mammas really make me feel better...and What a great idea Dentente,to put her poop from her diaper into the potty...I will try it...thank you and keep the ideas comming...peace , love and poop Peacefulmom
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#6 of 10 Old 01-11-2004, 07:33 PM
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Hey there!

Just to voice my opinion:

1) 28 months is NOT too late! If your friends and family are giving you a hard time, just ignore it. My 5 year old neice couldn't poop in the potty without huge trauma! Anyway, it sounds like your DD is right on track because,

2) It's very, very common for kids to be comfortable peeing in the potty, but not pooping.

Kids don't really understand the concept of elimination. To them, poop is part of their bodies and many have a really hard time understanding why it's something to get rid of. In addition to flushing her poop from her diapers, you might want to consider involving her in the process. We make kind of a deal out of it by waving saying "Bye-bye poop!" and then letting DS (26 mos.) flush the toilet. (We do it w/ pee, too.)

Also, if they are told that it's yucky, dirty, bad or something equally negative, they may develop a fear of it and not want to poop. If she seems interested in touching it or anything like that, try telling her that it's kind of stinky and you don't want to get it on the toys/furniture/whatever and that's why poop isn't something we touch. Be sure not to scold her for it.

Finally, consider getting a copy of "Everyone Poops" if you don't already have it. It's a great kid's book with nice artwork showing a huge variety of animals (humans included) and their various poops. It's actually pretty cute and funny.

Good luck!

ex-Californian, making my way on the East Coast with DS (10), DS (6) and WAHDH. Former extended BF'er, co-sleeper, and baby-wearer. Remembering how to garden.

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#7 of 10 Old 01-11-2004, 11:13 PM
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Just chiming in to say ds1 just turned 3 and had been fairly comfortable peeing in the potty for a while, but would not poop in it for anything. Finally about 3 weeks ago he ran in pulled down his pants, and pooped on the potty all by himself, we just finally got it together and he officially poops and pees in the potty and is wearing big boy underwear. I second not making a big deal out of it, however frustrating it may be to you, she is certainly on the young side of potty trainers, and is definately not behind!
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#8 of 10 Old 01-12-2004, 01:04 AM
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Just wanted to say that my dd has been wearing underpants and peeing in the potty for about 6 months...but she still almost always asks for a diaper to poop in. I think this is a pretty common pattern, although surprisingly it never seems to be mentioned in books.
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#9 of 10 Old 01-12-2004, 01:54 AM
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you feel about sweets but my DD is 23 months old and only wears a diaper to bed now.She never gets candy so as motivation we told her she would get chocolate if she used the potty.Eventually we dropped the treat for peeing but she still gets one choc chip(like for baking) or M and M if we have any for going poop.She will tell me now as she pees ...chocolate only for poop,only for poop!!LOL
The whole process has taken about 3 weeks.

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#10 of 10 Old 01-12-2004, 10:45 AM
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My daughter didn’t have any poop specific potty training issues but I can tell you two things relating to poop that I think positively helped the experience of using the toilet for her. My daughter pooped on the floor and we both looked at it up close and she touched it (a little) while we talked about it. And, we got Everybody Poops in the mail. Both of these things preceded her learning to use the potty by a couple of days.

I also hung around the potty for those first weeks. I remember my midwife telling me how important it was for *ME* to poop right when the urge hits and I kept that in mind for my daughter. If she doesn’t get to the toilet pretty much immediately, she has to wait for another urge before she can go again.

I second leaving the diaper as an option and getting the child involved. We didn’t use any praise or gifts to encourage her to use the potty.

*On an odd side note, I did explain to my daughter why I preferred for her to use the potty. I told her that it was easier for me and that I didn’t want to be throwing away diapers (we had switched to disposables) and that I thought she would be more comfortable out of diapers.

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