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#61 of 82 Old 03-07-2002, 08:04 PM
 
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Bambalily,
You are doing great, I have been aware of parents who couldn't potty train their child because the parents were too lazy to deal with it. You obviously are very aware of his needs and feelings, and it sounds like you are open to different ideas. You are definitely willing to get alittle dirty,-a prerequisite for cloth diapering.
Maybe try the big boy underpants, and just count on washing them alot for a little while. I know that encouraging my kids to see how 'big' they are, that their actions are important. My kids LOVE to be important. LOL I am not sure where this is going, maybe just sit with him and have a big boy talk about how mommy and daddy are feeling about this.
I have a book called "How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen, and Listen So Your Kids Will Talk" by Faber and Mazlish, and it talks about problem solving with your child. Most of it is for older kids, but I found the info in to work even on a 2 yr old, and dh(hee, Hee). It says to sit down with your child and discuss the problem as equals, asking for ideas, writing them down(all of them), and discussing them.
Maybe your ds doesn't know how frustrated or maybe a little angry you may feel.
Maybe I am just spouting.
Either way, just trying to throw some ideas your way. I wish I had known about or had access to something like this when I was learning with my first, my dd. Again much luck to you,



Kelli
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#62 of 82 Old 03-08-2002, 11:32 AM
 
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Bambalily,

I'm really sorry if you thought that I was directing my comments to you. I really wasn't, they were just sort of thrown-out-into-the-wind-general comments. Believe me, my kids arrived on our doorstep (figuratively speaking of course) with most of their personality set in stone. I didn't quite realize this until I had a second. I can look at videos from 3 years ago and recognize personality traits beginning to develope.
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#63 of 82 Old 04-12-2002, 07:00 PM
 
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I need some advice. My dd is 2 years old and about two weeks ago she said she wanted to wear "big girl underwear". So we went out and I let her pick out some big girl underwear. Since then she has been peeing on the potty and has not had but a few accidents (in the pee department). But everyday she poops in her underwear. I have narrowed the time of time when this is most likely to happen and I stay right with her, checking to see if she has to go, taking her to the potty, etc. But everyday without fail, she poops in her underwear. Also I tried staying with her in the bathroom for a while, reading, singing, etc. hoping that she would just relax. So, my questions are
1) Did I jump the gun i.e. she is not really ready?
2) Is it a bad idea to say "oh here's a diaper but only when you need to poop" ?
3) Or do I just ride this out?
BTW this doesn't really bother me, it's not much different than dealing with poop in a cd. I just want some feedback to see if I am on the right path. Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks.
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#64 of 82 Old 04-12-2002, 07:47 PM
 
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1) Did I jump the gun i.e. she is not really ready?
2) Is it a bad idea to say "oh here's a diaper but only when you need to poop" ?
3) Or do I just ride this out?


I think the answer is 3. I am training my last kid right now and it's the same story. I remember how much I agonized with my first. I don't have a problem with letting her have a diaper when she wants to poop. One day (and I hear it's different with girls) she'll tell you she wants the potty and that's it. It does take patience though. One thing I found it works really well to let them around with no underwear when at home.
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#65 of 82 Old 04-12-2002, 08:06 PM
 
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I agree. All mine were poop trained well after they were pee-pee trained. Keep offering the potty at pooptime but don't insist (as I'm sure you know!)


Sounds like you're doing great!! All mine were over three before they were trained !

peggy
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#66 of 82 Old 04-12-2002, 09:15 PM
 
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I would just ride it out.

My ds did the same thing. It lasted about 2- 3 weeks and then all of a sudden he stopped.
(DH was very happy as he seemed to always be the one who was closest - meaning he was the cleanup crew).
We never made a huge issue out the accidents.
Just encouraged the potty for next time.
Good Luck your doing a great job.
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#67 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 12:55 AM
 
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My 18-month-old dd has been expressing an interest in the potty and peeing in it frequently (though not reliably -- she's very definitely still in diapers). The idea that she's supposed to POOP in there too seems to be really foreign to her, though, so it's very interesting to know that this is quite common.

I seem to remember that my mother had some trouble poop-training my younger sister. She eventually did it with a bribe: if dsis would poop in the potty, the "poop fairy" would bring her a present. By coincidence, the UPS man showed up right after my sister pooped in the potty the very first time. I think he was actually bringing something else, but my mother brought out the present (a leotard with bells sewn on -- apparently this was my sister's heart's desire at the time) and said the poop fairy had brought it.

Sister called the UPS man the "poop fairy" for YEARS and YEARS afterwards ... often in his earshot The poop-training stuck, though. Once she'd done it once, she became a lot more willing to do it again.

My suspicion is that it's actually more natural to poop while squatting (most of the world does it that way) and pooping while _sitting_ is kind of its own skill. I've noticed that dd tends to squat, not sit, when pooping. If we all used Asian-style squat toilets our kids would probably poop-train sooner...
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#68 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 01:55 AM
 
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my son is just over three & has yet to poop in the potty... well, two little teeny bm's, but...

he frequently pees in the potty, though. he wears "generic" pullups with Bear in the Big Blue House on them, & i have not pushed him AT ALL...

should i be doing more? if i never actively potty "train" him, will he ever learn to go on his own? if not, should i make him start buying his own pullups when he enters high school?

thanks, everyone!

love, jenny
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#69 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 01:57 AM
 
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The other posts were great. Just had to add one from our early EC days. Abi no longer poops on her potty either, but she did for awhile when we were doing EC. I sat her on it and then sat myself on the floor by her. This was at her normal poop time. Then I grunted a lot. I know, it makes a funny picture, but she would start straining and most of the time would produce! Even now when she passes gas she will grunt afterwards and giggle.

The book Everyone Poops is very amusing and may teach where to go poop because it actaully has pictures of animals and people pooping. It's a really funny book, if you have that kind of humor. My friend's 4 year old saw the book at my house and the next day colored a picture of a tree with a pile of poop under it! lol!

Darshani

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#70 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 01:59 AM
 
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DS#1 is completely potty trained...if he's naked. We've had the same issues with underwear and pooping, so I leave him naked most of the time. I've noticed that he is getting better as he has more successes.

Kimberly
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#71 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 03:27 AM
 
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Abi pooped in the back yard yesterday while running around diaperless. hee hee! I noticed her sqatting down and looking at something in the dirt. I went to see what it was and it was poop! I shrugged and thought, well one less diaper to dunk!

Darshani

7yo: "Mom,I know which man is on a quarter and which on is on a nickel. They both have ponytails, but one man has a collar and the other man is naked. The naked man was our first president."
 
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#72 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 06:25 PM
 
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My ds was about 3 and 1/2, he was completely toilet trained with peeing, stayed dry all night, but would NOT poop in the potty!! He would take off his underwear, run down the hall, strip, pull on a pullups, and poop. How's that for control??
Sometimes, he would misjudge, and poop on the floor.(My dh was so funny, (We have to Do Something, he's like an ANIMAL!!!!) I would like to tell you we let nature take it's course, but I finally bribed him with gummy bears one day. He pooped, and said Wow Mommy, it didn't hurt!! I guess he was scared. Anyway, after that, he used the potty just fine without gummy bears.
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#73 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 07:26 PM
 
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I think I was like that too. I remember my mom telling me that her neighbors would bring me home after finding me pooping in the bushes in the apt. complex we lived in. This was when it was safe for kids to roam on their own a little-- all the moms stayed home and watched each other's kids. I remember my mom bribing me with a bite of ice cream every time I pooped in the potty.

Darshani

7yo: "Mom,I know which man is on a quarter and which on is on a nickel. They both have ponytails, but one man has a collar and the other man is naked. The naked man was our first president."
 
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#74 of 82 Old 04-14-2002, 11:36 PM
 
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Thanks everyone, for your great ideas. We definitely seem to be on the ride it out path and it is working out ok. Thanks for everyone's input. Now if only the nightwaking would be so easy to deal with
Cora
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#75 of 82 Old 05-04-2002, 11:49 AM
 
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Ok the third time I am typing this...

My 19 month old is ready for potty learning. She has used her potty quite a few times and when left with no diaper on she will SOMETIMES go to the potty on her own.

She always announces it after she has gone. "OHH NOO POO POO" at the top of her voice. She then pats the front if she has peed or pats the back of her diaper if she has pooped. She gets really upset about going when it is not in the toilet.

If she is not involved with something while not wearing a diaper, she will come get me "OHH NOO POOO POO" and then take my hand and lead me to the seen of the accident.

Ok mamas! I know NOTHING about potty learning. Please oh wise mammas tell me what i need to know.

Are we ready for training pants? I am tempted to put her in some and teach her how to pull them down. Her current diapers are a pain cause the covers are really hard to unsnap.

How do I help her get through this stage?

what advice do you have about this?

I have some books in the bathroom, is the Prudence Potty book worth anything?

TIA,
Shannon
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#76 of 82 Old 05-04-2002, 01:05 PM
 
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I don't have any advice, really--my 18 month dd is in the exact same phase. It was funny reading your post (could have written it myself except Finn calls it "pip" )

I haven't been worrying about the potty scene too much at this point. I still feel like she is really young to be getting it "perfect" and I've sort of just been following her lead in terms of when she is interested in trying to use the potty and when she just plain has better things to do...

She has been starting to get more upset lately when she "misses" and the amount of time she will tolerate a soggy diaper has gone way down. I think its just all part of her figuring out for herself how much better it is to use the potty than be stuck in a diaper all the time. We haven't gotten into training pants yet cause she just doesn't seem "there" yet and I'm not into pushing her...but heck, I've never done this before either!

Good luck!

Oh! We have "Once upon a potty" (with Prudence) and Finn likes it, but not as much as "Everyone Poops" which is the funniest book maybe ever...
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#77 of 82 Old 05-05-2002, 04:40 AM
 
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Everyone Poops by Taro Gomi is definitely an awesome book...

I recommend lots of naked time (if you've got easy to clean floors) and a couple of cheap Ikea or Baby Bjorn potties throughout the house. If you've got carpets, try training pants, big kid cotton undies, or cloth diapers (no pins or snappi) with velcro closures. In my experience, nothing is EASY for an 18 month old to remove, but velcro diaper covers are probably least difficult. Naked is certainly easiest for the child.

Keeping bathroom doors open helps a lot (child can see you in action ), if you aren't already doing that you might want to start...

I think it is important for using the potty to be a fun thing chosen by the child. Give lots of support, information, and opportunities, and the child will learn when she is ready.

Hope that helps....
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#78 of 82 Old 05-05-2002, 07:52 PM
 
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My girl friend told her her friend told her dh that when you poop in the potty it makes a rainbow.He NEVER went in the potty b4.Then one day he said to her,mom I want to make a rainbow.So he pooped and they put it in the big potty to flush,and she got all her food coloring,put a few drops in there and let him flush.IT REALLY DOES MAKE A RAINBOW!!!She has never had any problems with it since.
Just a thought.
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#79 of 82 Old 05-06-2002, 02:23 PM
 
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I skipped the training pants and went straight to panties. The pants tend to feel too much like a diaper, plus wearing panties like mommy was irresistable. I think it's great that your little one is telling you all about it...

We also have our "little potty" in an easy to see location. I really like the one we have, it has a padded seat that comes off and can go on the "big potty" seat, and the rest of the little potty makes a stool, so when the time is right dd can go right on the big potty, pretty cool......
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#80 of 82 Old 05-06-2002, 03:35 PM
 
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Hi! Not much advice really, my son is just starting, but my Mom gave me a little tid bit that I thought I'd pass on...

My son just turned 2 and is currently VERY motivated to blow out candles. We can get him to do all sorts of chores with the promise of it. My Mom suggested we try what she did for Sis and I... sit on the seat and watch the candle, go pee/poo and get to blow it out! [Or what ever.] I am going to try it, has anyone tried something like this, and did it work?
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#81 of 82 Old 05-06-2002, 08:54 PM
 
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Well, I have a potty using toddler. But I am not sure I had a method to our madness. Basically, when she wanted to wear panties, we'd put them on her. This started around 18-19 months. When I went, she would sit on the potty after me and sometimes pee. On a few occaisions she'd wake up, yell 'poop', and demand to be taken to the potty. She'd then poop. But none of this was consistent until just before she turned two.

For many months she seemed very aware of when she had just peed/pooped or was in the process. But she couldn't always determine when it was going to happen, especially if she was busy with something. We've been accident free for a week now. In the weeks preceding this, she could tell when she needed to go. But not in enough time to always make it. It was very upsetting for her. Then one day she could just tell when it was going to happen in time to get there.

She didn't like little potties so it had to be the big potty. We did read some potty books and talk about it. But mostly we left it up to her because we didn't have any idea how tho actually teach her. We just made sure she had the opportunity to see us and use it when she wanted. I think we got lucky.
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#82 of 82 Old 05-10-2002, 10:37 AM
 
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I would strongly recommend the video "It's Potty Time". You can buy it at www.onestepahead.com It worked with 2 of my boys and it has worked for a niece and a nephew and has been passed around to their friends as well. I don't know why it works, but the kids love it (as an adult, you feel like an idiot watching it and singing the songs to your kids).
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