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#61 of 90 Old 05-19-2010, 02:50 AM
 
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Katie. I'm glad you've got some positive things going on right now! A very, very happy birthday to Laine and a happy birthing day to you!

It sounds like you're happy with the job plans, which is fantastic. I'm very glad you've got Andrew home for a good while now! I can't imagine being a single parent to three (I'm doing it, again, this week!) full-time. It's very draining on me. But I know that you will make it work in whatever way it comes! And, you'll do a great job at it, too.

Do make sure you take the time you need to grieve. No matter what exactly happened, you had the hope of a baby in your heart, and losing that is heartbreaking. Just remember that all of your feelings are valid, no matter what they are at any given moment!


We've survived day 2 of having DH out of town, again. I suppose it's better to be getting used to it, but I'm none too thrilled that he's traveling so much. Job security is good, though. It is just exhausting, though, especially when Judah gets tired and goes crazy. (For instance, I'm typing with a "naked" D key because he broke the key cover off the laptop. ) I'm trying to be more proactive and get EVERYone to bed earlier so I can cope. I suppose tonight was a mixed bag, but they're all in bed and quiet - finally.

Gabriel had his second playoff game in Little League tonight. This is the first year we've had this part of the season. They were the next-to-worst team in their division (only 4 teams, but a wide margin), and were first paired up against the 2nd ranked team (again, only one above them, but big difference in record). They played a GREAT game and won! It's single elimination, so they moved on and the other team was done. So, tonight, they played the best ranked team. This team drove me NUTS all season. We played them in the first game of the year, and they were SO aggressive that I thought it was really wrong for being so early. Our guys seemed to hardly know what to do in a division with totally different rules (base stealing allowed, for instance), and the other team steam rolled them. It was so hard to watch. ...

That team was undefeated for most of the season, and the 2nd ranked team finally beat them, just once. (I was glad to see that, as I think being undefeated is NOT good for 8 year olds!) So we beat the team that beat the undefeated team, then had to play the (almost) undefeated team. They did a REALLY good job, leading for a long time and keeping it VERY close until the VERY end. If it weren't for about 15 minutes, we'd have had one more inning to play, and might have caught up again. As it was, they ended up losing what felt like very abruptly (our coach was calling them in to bat, when the ump said, no, game's over) by a score of 12-8. They were SO sad. Gabriel cried a ton, especially as he didn't get a hit in this game. He's been really struggling with hitting, but got a couple of hits in the last game (and was responsible for two runs, which is pretty significant in a game decided by one!). He tried so hard, too, but never got a third opportunity because of the time issue in this game.

So, poor boy... Done for the year, which wouldn't have been so hard if it weren't for the "postseason." But they actually did VERY well! The difference between the first game and last - same teams, same field, same everything - was just unbelievable! Very proud of them all.

I can't say I'm sorry baseball is over, though. Keeping up with Judah out there is tough! And today's game was AWFUL with heat and the angle of the sun. I'm just glad I didn't get sick right there. I'm not sure if we'll play next Fall or Spring or at all, especially since we're moving to a different league area. G wants to keep playing in the same league (and there are some great people in it, to be sure), but it would be about 3x as far from us at the new house. I think we have the option to stay with it, though, even when we move, so that's good.

Okay, sorry to ramble about baseball. At least it's kid-related! And I even got the toddler in there once or twice.

I think I'm going to try to chill for a bit... I had to leave my desk because there was a clear sound of a large bug (probably a tree roach) climbing around under it - though that's a strange place for it to get to. Could just be rustling of stuff shifting, but, um, can't take the risk. Especially when my DH isn't here to help rescue me! So, a little TV while I rehydrate, then off to bed with hopes of a productive day tomorrow.

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#62 of 90 Old 05-19-2010, 06:54 AM
 
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Heather, what we do is called solo parenting not single parenting I think? I still very much have the security and partnership of my dh and all he brings to the relationship. It is just some days he doesn't bring that to us by being here physically.

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#63 of 90 Old 05-19-2010, 02:09 PM
 
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Thank you, Heather I'm really glad to have you ladies. about the bug, I hate cockroaches and now that we live amongst the pines and woods they are everywhere outside. I'm glad you'll have a break from baseball for a while.

I'm relieved to have a timeline. I'm scared about buying a house as I know nothing about it, so we're going to do some research next spring/summer about best places to buy. I think our best bet is to buy in a high demand area, do some work on it, and then sell it when we go to Arizona. It's in an area with historic homes, homes built in the 40's, and new construction on huge lots in the middle of no where. As far as planning for another kid, I don't know if we will ever have an ideal situation where we can say let's have another baby at this time and have all things be optimal. We will always be working around moves and deployments. I know that I don't want to have another baby in NY because homebirth is getting pretty volatile there, and after that we'll be in Arizona so I'll likely be waiting several years if there's ever to be a 4th. It seems we're either dealing with really large age gaps or kids close together, I'd rather take them close together and get it over with.

I think I learned a lot with this last deployment, the key is just getting into a routine with everyone and finding a grocery store that has cart seating for that many kids

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#64 of 90 Old 05-24-2010, 01:57 AM
 
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mommajb, yes, that's probably a better term. I don't mean to minimize the realities of true single parenthood at all!

We survived, with not nearly as much hardship as last time, and DH is back home. He came home with news that the travel budget is cut, and there will be NO more travel for the foreseeable future. I'm hoping that means we'll have him here until sometime after baby comes in November, which is then major holiday time, so perhaps into the New Year!

Katie, a high demand area sounds like a good bet. That's the kind of place we're in now, and we've been here for 5 years. We've had our house on the market for a month, and have had people trying to beat our door down! We're not actually showing yet (still ), but that's our choice. I'm sure we'd have had offers by now if we were. Knowing that you're going to be there for X amount of time is great, so you can plan and budget accordingly with improvements, etc.

My MW comes tomorrow for my 14(.5) wk check. Been counting down the days for this one. Hopefully we can hear the heartbeat clearly this time and confirm some things like where my fundus is, etc. I'm also counting on the promise of a visit from her to encourage the boys to help me power-clean the house tomorrow.

We have so much to do, still, with moving. It's so overwhelming. We have to finalize ALL of our interior design decisions for the house by Tuesday when we have our final meeting. I thought they'd start on the foundation before we finished, but it turns out they are waiting on us. So time is of the essence, to give us the best possible shot at being in the house when we want to be (about 6 weeks before baby is due).

I'm trying not to worry too much about the September birthdays, too. We'll likely be here in this house, about to move, when September rolls around. I imagine we will NOT want to have parties here, yet we will almost certainly not want to be spending extra money on parties elsewhere, either. There's a chance our current neighborhood will have a brand-new water park by then, and if so, that may be our perfect out - near enough to not be a bear, wet enough to not be too incredibly hot, and hopefully they'll ensure there's some shade! Going to have to check on those plans (which the neighborhood is actually fighting) to give me some peace of mind!

How can we be just 4 months from their birthdays?!

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#65 of 90 Old 05-24-2010, 05:16 AM
 
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Good morning!

Katie - I'm glad you have some idea about the next couple of years.

Heather - good luck with all of the house stuff. I don't know how you do it!

If all goes well we will be moving to Cambridge by September at the latest I've been decluttering, and finally got DH somewhat on the decluttering train. He still wants to hang on to loads of stuff "just because", but a lot of books and games and clothes have gone to charity, and he's managed to throw quite a bit of stuff away. I also made him go through about 4 boxes of random stuff that I was sick of thinking about. I was hoping more would be thrown away, but at least the stuff is sorted and in some kind of order.

I can't believe our babies are almost three. Yann told me last night that he wants a Star Wars light sabre (his brother just got one and Yann loves it) and a tricycle for his birthday.
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#66 of 90 Old 05-24-2010, 01:22 PM
 
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I was just thinking yesterday that we just finished up one birthday and now we have to start planning another. So it goes I guess So hard to believe that they'll be 3 years old. I do feel like we're getting into an age where we can start doing a lot of fun stuff, though.

Heather - I may have questions for you in the future when we embark on the house buying journey I'm glad your DH will be home for good now, and I hope you have a great appointment

Rachel - Woohoo for decluttering and for your move to Cambridge!



I think we've come to a conclusion on our child question. Andrew talked to his chaplain about it and got some insight from him about his own family, they have two children who are preteens and two toddlers. His chaplain said that it's hard to do things with the older kids when they're still knee-deep in toddlerhood, which is what my line of thinking was as well. I'm of the mindset that it would be easier to have them relatively close together and get it over with instead of transitioning on to another phase and having to start all over again later on. And that way if there is ever to be a 4th, they still won't have a drastic age difference. I pretty much left it up to him to decide at this point but I think he understands my point of view now.

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#67 of 90 Old 05-24-2010, 01:54 PM
 
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I am seeing the wisdom in a 3-4 year age gap myself. Maternal health, reduced physical needs of older child, etc. My own mother always said she thought 3 years was about perfect. Mind you this is a gap neither one of us has so maybe what we both mean to say is "This is not quite what I thought it would be!" It is hard for me to take anyone under school age to school age events. This is compounded by taking 2-3 under school age to school age events frequently.

Stop the birthday talk already! I have a June (dd3) and July (dh) birthday before we even get to Sept.

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#68 of 90 Old 05-24-2010, 02:57 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mommajb View Post
Stop the birthday talk already! I have a June (dd3) and July (dh) birthday before we even get to Sept.

I was thinking, "We're thinking of September birthdays already?! I've got a June one to plan first!"

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#69 of 90 Old 05-24-2010, 03:14 PM
 
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Yes, we have a bit of time before September - but then I have 4 birthdays in less than 3 weeks to get through - me, Yann the next day, dd 12 days later, then ds1 4 days after that. :stars. DS2 has a birthday in mid-December, then DH is mid Jan. If I ever have another baby I would like a spring birthday .

My kids are spaced two years between dc1 and 2, 3 years 2 months between dc2 and 3, then almost 4 years between dc3 and 4. So a 9 year span. It works pretty well, but I can see how it would be difficult if we didn't homeschool as far as activities and such.
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#70 of 90 Old 05-24-2010, 08:07 PM
 
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My siblings and I are exactly 6 and 3 years apart and it did work out pretty well, though I was never close to my oldest brother until we were both adults. I will most likely never get a 3 year age gap between kids. Deployments are every 18 months or so, we're lucky to get nearly 2 years with Andrew like we are now. I'd love to TTC when Laine is two, but I'd be giving birth alone again and I'm just not up for that. It's important for us to have at least one child where he can be present for the birth and all of the sweet stuff during the first year.

My birthday is next month, and then we have Liam, and then Andrew's birthday is on Halloween.

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#71 of 90 Old 05-27-2010, 05:06 PM
 
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How is potty learning going for everyone? I am a little right now and trying to be consistent and patient with Lucy. But....I am ready to pull out my hair. We have moved away from diapers and into trainers full time now. She will p on the potty everytime I take her....but will not tell me when she needs to go. She will sit on the potty for 30 minutes and will promptly poo in her trainers 5 minutes later.....ugh! She also does not want to wear the diapers anymore...plus they were giving her constant diaper rash (disposibles)...so I am not willing to move backwards. So...we are moving forward very...very slowly. Just venting....ugh!

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#72 of 90 Old 05-27-2010, 06:04 PM
 
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I wish I could say we were actively pursuing potty training. Unfortunately, we're actively in the middle of SO much else, it's very hard to keep up with him. DS will be very interested in underwear, ask to wear it, etc. Then, not tell me when he needs to go. He HAS, in the past, told me when he needed to go and been pretty consistent with hit. Alas, we have spent more days OUT of the house than in over the last 6 months or so, so we just haven't had consistency here.

I know he CAN do it and I really want him to. It also seems utterly exhausting. It was actually easier when he was battling severe constipation, because I could whisk him off as soon as he started straining, and he'd generally go both ways on the toilet. I really wish we had a backyard where I could let him go naked! (But that won't happen until probably October.)

My other boys BOTH trained right at 2 years. I'm certain it's more me than him at this point, but, I'm starting to be afraid of how long this is going to take! I'm definitely spoiled by the first 2!

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#73 of 90 Old 05-27-2010, 11:46 PM
 
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about a month ago, maybe a bit longer, I got frustrated during a poopy change and just put him in underwear. His poop continued to surprise him for a couple of days but he seems to have gotten the hang of it. He still sits for everything using a ring to make the seat smaller as he says he doesn't want to fall in. He is dry at night more often then 2 of his sisters but that is another story.

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#74 of 90 Old 05-28-2010, 12:10 AM
 
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Regarding night-training, I'm hoping Jamison takes after her brother instead of her sister. That would mean she would be done with diapers in the next few months, as opposed to the next couple years. Think I'll be that lucky?

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#75 of 90 Old 05-28-2010, 01:43 PM
 
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Liam is pretty much potty training himself at his own pace with a little help from us. If he's naked or wearing just underwear or shorts he'll use the potty by himself with no reminders, but if he has a lot of clothing on he forgets and goes in his clothes. This morning Andrew took both kids out to breakfast with one of his friends to un-named restaurant with play place and Liam wandered in and took off his diaper and put his shorts back on, and then brought his diaper to Andrew because he peed in it. He ended up spending two hours with no diaper on and even stayed dry in the car and did fantastic. So basically he's reached a point I think where he wants to be more big boy-like and not have to deal with diapers, he's learned how to pee while standing up now that he has someone to observe so I think he's more enthusiastic.

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#76 of 90 Old 05-28-2010, 02:28 PM
 
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anxiously awaiting pictures of the ball...

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#77 of 90 Old 05-28-2010, 04:23 PM
 
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Pictures to be uploaded on Facebook. I woke up with my first hangover since college, so clearly we had a good time Andrew is a dancing fool and had a blast, as did I. It was really nice to have a night out with just us

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#78 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 06:19 PM
 
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Hello Mamas

It has been forever it seems since I checked in here....I really missed you all!!!!

Quick catch up...kids are great...Cian is a little maniac. I knew when he took his first steps at 9 months I was in for it He has no sense of danger it seems...but he is great fun. Only one urgent care visit and one ER visit so far...which seriously I am amazed by. He gives me heart attacks daily

Earlier this month I finally went to the doctor...I have been having a bunch of things going on really for about 10 years but just recently decided that it had to be more than job stress (no longer an issue) being pregnant and/or tandem nursing, etc. Did a bunch of tests and learned I have adrenal fatigue and started appropriate supplements. I am already feeling better just knowing I am not making it up.

Its nice and peaceful right now...a big storm is rolling in and the kids and dh are hanging out on the porch watching it. We spent all day picking cherries and working on the garden so very nice holiday for us

Hope you all are doing well and I can't wait to catch up with everyone

eta: just realized it wouldve probably been better to wait til tomorrow or so for the June thread...oh well

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#79 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 06:36 PM
 
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Hi greenmagick! Nice to see you! I'm glad you have got a diagnosis and are on the road to healing.

katie - glad you had a good time a the ball. You certainly were due for a fun night out with your DH.

Yann potty-learned last October. He pretty much did it on his own. I had done a bit of ECing with him off and on since he was a newborn so I guess that helped. My others did not potty-learn so early.

I'm super tired. WIll catch up with everyone on the June thread.
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#80 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 06:41 PM
 
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Good to see you, Nicole! Glad to hear you got the adrenal fatigue dx! I figured out after reading about adrenal fatigue here on MDC that I've got it, and my sister does, too. Haven't gotten specific help for it, but have done some things on my own. I hope you're feeling much better soon!

With all the talk of potty training, I finally got fed up with Judah's not telling me if he needed to go potty any time he had anything ON. I took whatever he was wearing off at one point, forgot to putting it back on, and he ran in telling me he had to go potty. So I pulled out the Baby Bjorn potty, put it on the tile, and let him run around naked. He is sleeping in diapers and DH isn't one to take them off when he gets up, but on day 3 or so of this, apparently Judah took off his own diaper this morning and decided to go naked AND go potty. He came to the bed to nap with me, nekkid-bummed, and got up dry! He finally went just now. The only accident we've had was him not QUITE getting on in time and a little getting on his leg or side of the potty. He's getting both sorts in the potty, including bringing me the potty one time when I was in the kitchen working on laundry, saying, "Mommy! I got ickies out! I got ickies out!" Freaked out DH, but, yay!

Anyway, not sure how long it'll be before he decides to stay dry ALL the time, but I'm grateful for progress - and fewer diapers!

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#81 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 08:16 PM
 
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Hi Nicole! Cian and Liam sound a lot alike, always keeping me on my toes. I'm glad you found out what was going on at the doctor. We're getting stormy weather as well!

Hurray for Judah! And for you too, Heather



We had a really busy weekend with my IL's staying until Sunday morning and my brother getting in with his wife and kids in the afternoon. They ended up leaving this morning. It was nice seeing everyone but I'm looking forward to some down time before we go on vacation this coming Sunday.

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#82 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 08:48 PM
 
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Yay Judah!

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#83 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 09:51 PM
 
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potty learning is going no where. Feels like an epic fail. I even tried the "big girls go to the potty" thing and now when I change her she says "I'm a baby"



My babies were born at home! 09/07, 01/10, and 09/12 joy.gif

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#84 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 10:07 PM
 
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potty learning...cian is no where near it. He will go when I put him on the potty and we have had accident free days doing that but he had no concept of actually going to the potty when he has to go...he just goes.

My dd wasnt potty learned til right around 3...maybe a bit later. She is over 4 now and still is horrible about it...meaning she will hold it ALL day if I dont force her (read we are not leaving til you go...not actually holding her on it or anything)

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#85 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 10:19 PM
 
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FG, Linus plays the baby card so often. He is a whiz at it. His big thing is to sit on our laps at meals an have us feed him. Dh is constantly suggesting he use his hands and feed himself but he doesn't want his hands dirty. "But it is a fried egg on toast!" The boy clearly has issues that are not my fault. Charlotte is more than happy to be dirty, filthy dirty in fact.

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#86 of 90 Old 05-31-2010, 11:01 PM
 
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I think our biggest thing is that Liam has reached a point where he's tired of having to stop and lay down for diaper changes. I STILL can't get him to poop on the potty, though. He poops first thing when he wakes up and stays in his room to do it, so by the time I hear him awake he's already gone. We've talked about pooping on the potty but he doesn't want to do it.

ribbonyellow.gif Army wife ribbonyellow.gif - Mama to Liam waterbirth.jpg (9/07), Laine uc.jpg (5/09), and Eliza h20homebirth.gif (7/11)

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#87 of 90 Old 06-01-2010, 08:08 AM
 
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Linus got a new "train backpack" yesterday and he has worn it all night long.

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#88 of 90 Old 06-01-2010, 08:48 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mommajb View Post
Linus got a new "train backpack" yesterday and he has worn it all night long.
cute!
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#89 of 90 Old 06-01-2010, 11:54 AM
 
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Linus got a new "train backpack" yesterday and he has worn it all night long.
awwww

Cian is train obsessed right now....he even talks about them in his sleep lol...trains and quesadillas

Nicole - )0( unschooling mama to Lilahblahblah.gif (12/21/05) and Cianwild.gif (9/21/07) as well as 3 dog2.gif 2 cat.gif,  4 rats, chicken3.gif and ducks
 
 

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#90 of 90 Old 06-01-2010, 03:26 PM
 
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new thread! http://mothering.com/discussions/sho....php?t=1230008

My babies were born at home! 09/07, 01/10, and 09/12 joy.gif

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