3 year old still poops in a diaper - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 13 Old 09-28-2010, 02:58 PM - Thread Starter
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I'm sure there is a discussion already started about this somewhere ..... my 3 yr old (turned 3 in august) is still pooping in a diaper. She is completly potty trained and never has accidents....just when she has to poop, she comes and asks me for a diaper. I have tried to take the stand of just letting this go....after all, she won't poop in a diaper when she's 12. But I am wondering if there are non-threatening things I can do to encourage her to poop on the potty. Today, I tried suggesting that she sit on the potty with a diaper on and try pooping sitting down. She was not down with that! My theory is that her position of choice for the most comfortable poop is to stand and often lean on something and so the idea of sitting to do that is just so foreign to her. Makes me think I should do my EC with my 4 month old!

Any thoughts or suggestions?

Sarah, SAHM to dd C (8-9-07) and C (5-27-10), happily married to DH for 10 years

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#2 of 13 Old 09-28-2010, 03:17 PM
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That's tough. Do you use cloth or disposables? If it's disposables, I've heard it recommended to have her see how many diapers are left and tell her there won't be any more for her to use after they are gone. You could probably do the same with cloth if you put all the cloth diapers you have for her in one spot and let her use them until they are all used up.
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#3 of 13 Old 09-28-2010, 03:50 PM
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I don't have much advice, but I'm right there with you. DS is 3 1/2, and has been fully dry for the day and his naps for at least 9 months, but he still poops in a diaper. Part of the issue with him is he's not night dry, so he gets a diaper to go to bed, and he waits to poop until he has his diaper on, and then comes wandering out of bed to be changed. So I wind up going through two diapers, instead of one, and it drives me crazy. He CAN poop on the toilet. He does it for my mom, and sometimes he'll surprise me, but mostly he has this habit of pooping in bed, and it's what works for him, and he refuses to give it up.

For a long, long time, I decided to just let it go. I learned that lesson with DD1-- that there are certain things you just have to let them get around to doing on their own.

I'm having good luck, right now, with outright bribery-- I have a big bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips in the bathroom, hung out of reach, and ANYONE who can show me poop in the toilet gets a handful. So even if my DDs poop, they get some too, so DS watches them get the "reward." (They don't NEED a reward, of course.)

Anyway, we've been doing this for a week, and the last three days, he watched as DD2 pooped and got her chocolate, and then ran in to sit on the toilet and try and get some chocolate for himself.

So my solution would be bribery. Which probably isn't what you wanted...

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#4 of 13 Old 09-28-2010, 03:55 PM
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Let her watch you poop, dump poop from diaper in the potty, talk about her pooping in potty and maybe ask her if she wants to try sometimes when she is already there to pee. I would keep it cool like you have been. She will get there.
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#5 of 13 Old 09-28-2010, 04:16 PM
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When my younger dd went through this, we read _Everyone Poops_ about 95 times (dd found the book interesting), and promised to take her out for ice cream when she finally did it.

I don't know if those things actually helped, but we felt like we were doing something and that helped us not to be too nutty about it.
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#6 of 13 Old 09-28-2010, 04:25 PM
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Same issue

DD is 3 and totally potty trained but says "Time to poop momma, I need a pull up.." I've done everything: I've offered her bribes (from a new pet to a chocolate milk) and she doesn't seem to care, and I've also just said "nope no pull ups" only she held it in so that didn't work. She also won't sit so I'm thinking it's the same type of issue

I'm letting it go, she can't poop in her pull up forever!

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#7 of 13 Old 09-29-2010, 02:23 AM
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Our god-son is 4 and still asks for a diaper. Because I'm not parent, there's little I can do, forcefully, ya know. But at our house, I at least make him go in the diaper, In the Bathroom. I'd prefer it sitting on the toilet, but just the bathroom is so much for him. He really wants to be alone - normally the closet in "his" bedroom, so just forcing him to stand in the bathroom is a big one.
We have all pooped in front of him; we've tried candy, cars, stickers on a board in the bathroom. We've read the Everyone Poops 1000 times.

I'm hopeful that now he's in preschool - which doesn't allow for potty training (although apparently his mom did alert that he isn't 100%, but will just hold it... oh poor kiddo) - that he'll get the idea from seeing other kids.

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#8 of 13 Old 09-29-2010, 03:55 AM
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Same problem over here with DS. He will pee in the potty no problem. He only wants a dipe when he has to poop, and he absolutely refuses to poop on the potty. We tried everything, including bribery, which did not work.

So I'm just letting it go for now. He's 3. I'm sure at some point he will do it. Sigh.
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#9 of 13 Old 09-29-2010, 03:36 PM
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I'm in the same place. My son turned three august 12. He will only poop in a diaper squatting while playing at his castle. When we go out of town I have to bring the castle with us (enabler?!). I've tried the bribery thing but it does not work. Instead he just peeps in the potty and asks what he gets for peepeeing in the potty. I'm just playing the waiting game.
IF you find something that works let me know!
Good luck with the poopy learning!

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#10 of 13 Old 09-29-2010, 07:53 PM
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We are in the same place with my son that turned 3 in July. Pees just fine in the toilet, even wakes up dry. Have you given her something to rest her feet on and to help her push against? I tried it with my ds and it didn't help, but it may help yours.

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#11 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 09:20 AM
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What we did when we potty trained was put all of the diapers away. Totally. So as far as she is concerned it is not an option.

Then I told her that we need to keep her underpants clean. Thoughout the day I would ask her "are your pants clean?" - of course they were are we would clap and say yaaaaaaaaay! There were some accidents in the pants of course but after a few days of this she held the poop all day. The next day she sat on the toilet to pee and asked me to close the door. She was in there quite a while and she pooed. And that was it.

Recently she had a short regression for a few days where she started going in her underpants again. We did the clean pants routine again and after a day we were bakc to normal (after one day of poop holding). Now she likes to read a magazine on the toilet.

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#12 of 13 Old 10-01-2010, 02:53 PM
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Maybe a bribe & the diapers are suddenly all gone & we can't buy anymore. Plus toilet entertainment, even adults like something to occupy themselves with while pooping. Or change of scenery. Maybe she'd poop on the potty in the play area or outdoors?
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#13 of 13 Old 10-03-2010, 01:41 AM - Thread Starter
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Thanks for the responses! If anything, it's just nice to know this isn't totally out of the norm. I decided to try some bribery. I got some M and M's (which she LOVES) and tried it out. She gave it a try but just coudln't do it (and didn't end up pooping at all). This freaked me out b/c I do not want to deal with her holding it-I've had many friends whose kids were on laxatives b/c the kids would hold it for like a week! AH!

I guess she just really is not ready. I'll keep encouraging but keeping it no pressure for now.

Sarah, SAHM to dd C (8-9-07) and C (5-27-10), happily married to DH for 10 years

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