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Potty Training: When did you start? When did you finish?

2K views 55 replies 41 participants last post by  physmom 
#1 ·
One method claims to work in 3 days one in one day. Most parents I talk to say it took several months from beginning to completely diaper free. I've read studies that say if you start earlier you will finish earlier but it will take longer ( like start at 12 months finish at 20 months vs start at 36 months and finish in 3 days). I just red something in the Potty training in one day book that said kids who started at 2 mostly finished by 3 but kids who started at 18 months or earlier didn't finish till 4 or after. I don't know if I believe that!


So at what age did you first start potty training and at what age were you daytime dry and then at what age nightime dry?

Thanks!!
 
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#2 ·
Hah, well here's my experience:
DD1: Started on day three (of life), diaper free at 18 months, dry with few accidents without prompting at 21 months.
DD2: Started on day two or three of life, we can go diaper free but we are quite busy and I'm waiting for that 18 month benchmark to take off diapers and go commando.

I know LOTS of children who started after two and didn't finish until four or later (too many to count but 35 whom I know personally in diapers at 3.5 despite training beginning with all "readiness signs" at two sounds about right), but I only know of two children (hearsay) that were pottied as infants that didn't finish until after three.

One was the eighth of ten kids, this was in Asia, she was pretty neglected by our standards, her eight-year-old sister was in charge of her.

One I read about here on MDC, mom was having issues, child just did not interrupt play for pottying.

You can read about a lot of successes on the Elimination Communication board for early starting.
 
#3 ·
I'd love to hear answers on this too. We introduced the potty several months ago and all my DS wanted to do was stand on it or take it apart
.

I think I got him to pee 2 drops in it once
. Now at 2, he wants nothing to do with it. Being wet/dirty bottomed never bothered him so I fear we have a long road ahead.
 
#4 ·
My take is, no matter when you start, your child will be potty trained when they are ready.
I actively tried potty training my eldest when he turned 2. He wasnt 'trained' until he was 4.
The 6 next babies were self led. We showed them the potty, we brought them to the bathroom with us, we applauded when they sat on the potty even if it was for a sec.
1st child- using potty fulltime by 4
2nd-3yo
3rd-his 2nd birthday he sat on the potty next to big brother, peed and never used a diaper again!
4th-3 1/2yo
5th-2 1/2yo
6th- 2yo
and 7th is currently 16mo, sits on his potty when he sees one of us on ours

No pee yet, only toys
 
#5 ·
DS1 - got the potty on 2nd bday. He peed in it once a month or so, but mostly liked to sit on it while I was going potty. We really started trying to potty train at 34 months and were diaper free in less than a month. He was perfect with pee, but poo took at least a month longer. By 3.25 he was 100% potty trained.

DS2 - 30mo and has yet to do anything on the potty. I'm waiting for him to want to do it before I start trying to encourage it.
 
#6 ·
We started at 4.5 months. Apart from a few tiny accidents, DS never pooped in his pants again. Peeing took a bit longer, but at about 15 months, he was mostly dry during the day. Now at 2.5 years old, he is doing his business completely independently (although I do need to wipe his bottom). He's been consistently dry at night for about a week. It's been a very, very gradual process and he never liked the potty, preferring to use the toilet instead.
 
#7 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by just__angel View Post
My take is, no matter when you start, your child will be potty trained when they are ready.


When DD was 20 months she snuck a pee in the potty without even telling me during one of her naked times. The very next day, I let her go naked all day and she went on the potty without prompting and had no accidents. She never went pee in her diaper again. In fact, it was an issue because we kept her in a diaper going out on long outings probably too long, so we didn't have to worry about a bathroom for her, but she would refuse to go in her diaper and hold it for a restoom.

Prior to this we just talked about the potty and left it in the bathroom. we never ever ever put her on it, but she would sit on it while we went (in her diaper.) And, we gave her a ton of nakid time starting at about 13 months. She never had accidents during the hour or so of nakid time a day. We never thought that was wierd, but maybe it is. I dunno.

We never did EC. I got the potty on a whim thinking it would be good for DD to get to know for when she started PTing at 2.5.
 
#8 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Latte Mama View Post
I'd love to hear answers on this too. We introduced the potty several months ago and all my DS wanted to do was stand on it or take it apart
.

I think I got him to pee 2 drops in it once
. Now at 2, he wants nothing to do with it. Being wet/dirty bottomed never bothered him so I fear we have a long road ahead.
This was us exactly. My DD2 used her potty as a big puzzle and a step stool. She did use one of those cushioned potty seats that go on a toilet at about 3.5. Once she decided to use the toilet she never put on another diaper and only had 2 accidents during the first week. So I guess we didn't really 'potty train' at all, just waited until DD2 wanted to use the toilet like everyone else in the family. It was really easy and completely stress and drama free. We have relatives who did the whole making their kid, 6 months older than DD2, sit on a potty every few hours and he potty trained closed to the same age as DD2 did, except the kid had months of being upset and annoyed by the whole process. Except for the EC LOs, I think kids stop using diapers when they are ready.

I did the same thing with DD1, now 24years old, and she started using a potty right before turning 2. Kids are just ready at different times.
 
#9 ·
Started "potty learning" e.g. introducing the concept of a potty in the first week of life.
Independent for requesting a potty for pooping by 16.5 months.

Able to stay dry with help, not yet. (~3 accidents a week from 18 months on)
Independent for requesting a potty for peeing, not yet. (from time to time since 20 months, but no consistency)

But she's been able to manage her own pants for a while now. So around 23 months for being able if not willing to do the potty independently (she likes me to get her toys/books for her
)
 
#10 ·
Well...hmmm...Ds1 was part time EC'ed when he was really young, but then stopped when he was 1yo. We didn't do any EC after that. He never seemed bothered by wet diapers.
We might have done little tries here and there before he was 3, but when he turned 3 I got really motivated, and he was pee pt'ed in a few days. He maybe had one or two accidents after that. I didn't actually do much, IIrc; he was just ready.
For poop, I think he was a bit scared for some reason, so we did a sticker chart (that HE was in charge of deciding if he got a sticker, and putting it on, etc- so more of a checklist for himself). That worked pretty fast, but we had to keep up the sticker chart for a few weeks to keep him motivated enough to not be scared.

Ds2, we're doing very part time EC, and he pees in the potty most mornings, and sometimes after naps. He's only 15mos, so who knows where that will go. We change him after every pee, but if we miss one, he often comes and tells us that he's wet. I think he dislikes being in a wet diaper, so maybe that will help.
 
#11 ·
I should say, children under two cannot usually pull down their pants, wipe, and pull them back up adequately. Or at least many can't. Many also would do so if the toilet was in the main room, but do not feel comfortable going into the bathroom alone.

So it depends. If you think "finish" means, child asks to go to the potty most of the time and will use it when asked before a walk or a trip, but needs help with some logistics, I think it can happen very early.

If you mean, I don't have anything to do with toileting, I think there's no way it's happening before three.

I feel a huge mistake many parents make is they just tell the child where to go and if one of the many logistical issues is daunting for the child (pants down, wiping, bathroom alone is scary, doesn't like feel of seat on bottom), then the child is asked to wait for months more.

All depends on what you mean by success, I suppose.
 
#12 ·
Maybe it was laziness or just our go with the flow attitude but I don't feel i trained dd at all - we tried getting her to sit on the potty at 18m and on and off for another year but while she seemed to display some signs of readiness she didn't have the interest or motivation to do it - at 2.75 I KNEW she could do it (don't remember how I knew tho?) but when I asked her when she would wear underwear she just said "when I'm three" - well on her third b-day we took away the diapers and she NEVER.HAD. AN. ACCIDENT.... She stayed in diapers at night for another 6 months or so and we noticed right before we would go to bed she would be writhing around so we started taking her to pee then - that lasted a week and she was done...no night time accidents either

I know this is not typical but really - no training involved on our part at all...

About the only really good advice I read from my mainstream Parenting magazine was that children will learn to potty in a way that is consistent with their temperament - and my dd does not like to do things until she can do them perfectly - she COULD have walked at 9 months - she RAN/cruised along the couch before risking a single step - then at 10.5 months she let go and never toddled or stumbled

and now with reading? at age 6.75 - she's been doing fine/grade level stuff but just won't 'risk' reading to me, claims she doesn't know most of the time - I jokingly said she won't read until she can read War and Peace - and sure enough last night as I was reading Ch 20 of the Secret Garden she wanted to know exactly where I was and stared reading some of it back to me, until we got to the Yorkshire accents and I told her that was tough for even me (to read out loud) and was content to just listen
 
#13 ·
DS started at 2y 2m with a 4 week old baby sister. He was dry at night and then had the Super Pee every morning that no diaper could contain. I found Diaper Free Before Age 3 super helpful. He stopped wearing diapers at 2 1/2 . In my experience at pre-school, the kids that started around 2 were much, much easier to train. It isn't a battle of wills, just hey, lets read some stories on the potty at these specific times. Potty learning can occur at lots of different times. It was very helpful to switch to training pants early because it kept us on track, as much as the kids. Yes, we had some accidents but not all that many. For boys, I think it is easier to get them to pee sitting down first because it helps figure out the whole poop in the potty thing. They can figure out pee standing up later.

Most of us, the parents on these boards, were trained by 2.
 
#14 ·
Quote:
but kids who started at 18 months or earlier didn't finish till 4 or after. I don't know if I believe that!
Not true in the least. Read "Diaper Free Before Three". DD2 and DD3 were both completely done before their 2nd birthdays. I think I started one around a year and the next around 6 months.
 
#15 ·
DS is 20 months & we tried EC with him occasionally but it just seemed to upset him more. He started using the potty multiple times a day probably around 14 months?? Then we seemed to end up with lots of potty drama so we actually kind of discouraged the potty for the past few months, though he still does pee in it a couple times a day. It seemed like he was/is intellectually ready to use it (very interested, understands what it's for, WANTS to use it) but physiologically just isn't ready -- he can't hold his pee & can't poop in the potty & he seems to be more upset about the whole potty thing. So we're in 'wait & see' mode... one of these days I want to try a modified version of the 3-day potty method to see if going all out with it might get him over the hump, but I've yet to work up the motivation since I know it will be a ton of effort for both of us!!
 
#16 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by pranava View Post
that said kids who started at 2 mostly finished by 3 but kids who started at 18 months or earlier didn't finish till 4 or after. I don't know if I believe that!

I call total BS on that one. Unless, well, if the author's experiences with training before 18 months was the abusive training with forcing kids to seat on a potty chair (some had straps!) until they performed which caused constipation and worse, then I could see that particular sample set of "early learners" not being done until after 4.

But that'd bring up a whole 'nother problem about the author's ability to do research. I mean using a sample set that's not even from the same half century as your target audience's kids?

I think it's in the book to scare clueless people who will follow a book and not their child into waiting until the kid is older. Older the kid, more chance that they'll have the cognitive development to be able to be trained even if they aren't ready to learn on their own. Which is admirable, but sucks for people who do follow their child and just don't have the time or inclination to be on top of everything in the world of potty learning.
 
#17 ·
DD was 22 months when we started training and she was completely done, day and night, at 23 months. I had part time EC'ed her from 5 months so she was ready to make the jump to panties.

She just turned 2 and she can't pull her pants up and down on her own yet. She tells me when she needs to go and I go with her. She will even wake up and call out to us at night when she needs to go.
 
#18 ·
When DS was 21 months, we decided to try a nakey day and see what happened. He has been diaper free ever since. For the first few nights we put a pull-up on him, but he was dry in the mornings and he asked to wear underpants at night, too, so he did. He has had 1 accident since July. He needs help to wipe after a poop, but other than that he goes on his own. I decided to NOT read any potty training stuff and just do what my mama instincts told me. With DD we do a little EC'ing and at 14 months she can ask to use the potty to poop but has a hard time with pee. I think if I paid more attention to her cues we could figure out the pee thing but I haven't put as much time into it as I would have liked.
 
#19 ·
We started at 25 months. Just went completely diaper free for awake time. Took a few days for it to click, although he peed quite a bit on the potty those first few days, he was just peeing all the time.

Then he had a really good stretch from 26-29 months, pretty much all pees in the potty.

At 30 months he is now too busy playing to go potty - or so it seems. We've brought back the motivators (skittles) and it's working again. He just needs a lot more reminders now than he did before.

I'm sure he will be completely accident free when he is ready, but I like not having to do a lot of diaper laundry, so I am okay with how it is going.

And, he will go for a days of pooping in the potty and then wait for a pull-up at naptime or bedtime most days. Which is a bummer, but it's alright too.
 
#21 ·
We started at about 23 months. Bare-butt method around the house. He did fairly well, but still had to be in diapers when we went out, and the two mornings a week he went to daycare. He was out of diapers at his second birthday, but still having accidents when not bare-butt. It took a while to "get it" completely while wearing regular underwear and pants, but by about 25 months, he was down to one accident a week, barring weird circumstances. Nowadays (2.5 y/o) the only "accidents" we get are pre-potty dribbles when he's too busy doing important toddler things to get to the bathroom before a drop or two squeezes out.

He's still not dry at night, though.
 
#22 ·
For DD - we potty trained her a few weeks before her 2nd birthday. She took about a day and never had accidents. We wiped her butt till she was 3 but she was able to do most of the pull up/pull down unless there were buttons and snaps involved. She night trained at the same time.

For DS - we potty trained him a few weeks after his 2nd birthday. He took about 48 hours for pee and about 2 weeks for poop (he was petrified to poop on the potty and it was a crazy ordeal to get him to finally trust it was going to be okay!). We still wipe his butt (he's 2.5 now) and he still needs a good amt. of help getting his pants up and down unless he's in sweat pants.

IME, potty training isn't a hugely difficult thing. You have to be responsive to your child, but firm. Once you go undies, you don't go back. They might be scared, but new things CAN be scary, and I just encouraged and helped them through it, like I would anything else. My son is VERY strong willed and language delayed and it was just a matter of getting on his level and going through the process with him.
 
#23 ·
We started at 14 months and dd was pl'd during the day at 19 months (but there was a move in there so she went back into diapers). She's now 23 months, and asks to go potty (like I can trust her, unless she says something she doesn't need to go), but still has trouble with her pants, so I have to take her unless she's wearing a dress with no panties. I intend to start around the same time with any future children.
 
#24 ·
We started offering with DS1 around 18 months and once it clicked, he was done in a few days at 21 months.

DS2 we started around 20 or 21 months offering the potty around bathtime, etc. and once it clicked he took about 10 days at 23 months.

Bare-bottom method for both and they learned to manage pants/undies shortly after. I still help with wiping as requested, especially with DS2.

Neither are fully dry at night, though DS2 is close.
 
#25 ·
DD2 decided on her own at 2.5y to PL, she did it in one day, day and night, never had an accident. I know that is rare.
I introduced the potty right at 2 with DD2, she was so not interested. About 1.5m later, she wanted to use it and she did. I had to remind her and help her for months, she had some accidents here and there but was mostly dry. Then DS came and she backtracked for a while before eventually getting back on track. She will be 4 this week and is still not dry at night.

The difference between the two was huge, DD1 was ready all on her all, I did nothing. WIth DD2 I had to watch the clock, remind her, bribe her, change wet pants, read book after book while she sat on the potty. Honestly I have better things to do with my time and i highly doubt I will start DS at that age but wait until it is less work on me.
 
#26 ·
Peony, I love your signature right now. That is so where I'm trying to be... hard while going through a separation, but anyway. LOL!
 
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