Quiet time? or am I being mean? - Mothering Forums

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Old 11-10-2010, 11:37 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am having a hard time setting boundaries with my 29 month old. He has never been a good sleeper, and now that my milk supply is dwindling he is getting worse. He just recently started fighting sleep again for whatever reason. His molars are in. He's done teething and I thought I would finally be getting sleep.

 

I can't do this anymore, and now he is fighting his naps. I need time to do work because we need the money. It's only 2 hours, yet he can not seem to go down for his nap. But then he will be tired at 5:30pm and crying to go to sleep.

 

I have heard of putting them in the room with the door closed. So that is what I am doing right now. He is in there saying "I need help with these toys, Mama". I feel like such a bad Mama... I am ignoring him.

 

I need help. Seriously. I have given *every* second of *every* day and *every* night to this child. I have let my house fall apart and my health run down from sleeplessness. I am ready to set some boundaries for my own personal comfort.

 

He gets up at night and wants to "play". He puts the light on at 3:30 in the morning and wakes everyone up and won't let us sleep. I know this could be related to allergies, but I'm so tired of trying to figure this all out. I have kept him soy, dairy, corn and wheat free for 2 years. We can hardly eat anything. Our food bill is outrageous. I'm so burned out. But I don't want to hurt him by withdrawing. Please help me make some sense of this all.

 

Please know that I am a highly sensitive person and so is my child. When I say I am giving *everything* to him, I mean it.

 

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Old 11-10-2010, 04:37 PM
 
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Giving yourself and your little one a set "quiet time" is not mean.  Since you have not been doing it all along, though, shutting him in his room for an hour might qualify as "mean".  I would load him up with books and toys and an egg timer.  Start with 10 minutes, set the timer and make it a game to see if he can wait to talk to you until the timer goes off.  We used to do it with a baby gate instead of a closed door.  My daughter is 4 and naps occasionally, but has quiet time every day.  We do 45 minutes.

 

Setting boundaries is not something to avoid! 

 

Edited to add: Make sure you do it as a natural part of the day, not in reaction to becoming frustrated or something like that.


~Amy~ Wife to my best friend Brandon. Mama to my sweet girl Eden (11/6/06) and my little man Theo (6/25/09)
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Old 12-31-2010, 08:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the advice. We definitely need those boundaries and Im going to try and get a schedule in with him...
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by herwitsend View Post

Giving yourself and your little one a set "quiet time" is not mean.  Since you have not been doing it all along, though, shutting him in his room for an hour might qualify as "mean".  I would load him up with books and toys and an egg timer.  Start with 10 minutes, set the timer and make it a game to see if he can wait to talk to you until the timer goes off.  We used to do it with a baby gate instead of a closed door.  My daughter is 4 and naps occasionally, but has quiet time every day.  We do 45 minutes.

 

Setting boundaries is not something to avoid! 

 

Edited to add: Make sure you do it as a natural part of the day, not in reaction to becoming frustrated or something like that.




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