Xposted in Life With A Babe...
I have been trying to introduce a "lovey" to my 11 month old LO for quite sometime. I tried stuffed animals, pieces of cloth from my clothing, blankets, etc...but he hasn't attached himself to anything.
I know this is normal- and I certainly can't force an attachment to anything-- but I was just curious, does your LO have one...and if so, when did he or she attach to it?
My 3 year old had a lovey, and it just happened naturally (actually, she has RAD and until recently she wouldn't attach to any actual people, but latched on to a yellow teddy bear as an infant). Nothing I did influenced when or what she chose. My 21 month old does not have a lovey. I guess she doesn't need one or something. She nurses when she needs comfort, she nurses at night, she nurses when she's hurt...apparently that's all she really needs in terms of loveys. :lol: She's not all that attached to any of her toys and when she wants to sleep with one, it's whatever one was the last one she was playing with that day.
So, I think that for some children, they just don't do the lovey thing. I'm trying to remember whether my DS had one...I don't believe he did.
Yeah, that's certainly true. Sometimes I wish she'd like anything else at 4 am though. :yawn:
DS is 18 mos and no lovey. About 6 mos ago, I tried to introduce one as I thought it would make bedtime easier, but to no avail. DD never really had one either.
Freedom is slavery.
Ignorance is strength.”
― George Orwell, 1984
DD (18 months) has three blankies and two babies that are her loveys. two of the blankies are the ones we've tucked her in at night with since she was 4 months. the babies are more recent, from the last couple of months, because she's been going through a baby crazy phase (she loves real babies too). her third blanket is one that's covered in duckies, and she is crazy about ducks, so she attached to that. I guess starting with a blanket or scrap of cloth that they sleep with is a good place to start.
part-time and through infancy. planning a
My DD has a stuffed bunny thats been in her crib since she was a newborn. She has always loved it. I'm not sure when the lovey attachment formed, but it was early - She was barely a year old when she started dragging it everywhere.
DD1 doesn't have one, never really did.. She rotates through her stuffed animals depending on her mood for the moment. Tonight I think shes sleeping with a stuffed minnie, last night it was a dinosaur, night before it was a cat.. Basically whatever it is closest to her when she decides she wants to sleep.. DD2 has her monkeys though. One in particular she loves and will get very upset if she loses it or misplaces it. After not being able to find it one night and not getting any sleep because of it I bought a spare to keep in the cupboard just in case it gets lost.
Both my boys have loveys. DS1 latched on to a blanket I always used when we nursed-by 3 months he wouldn't sleep without it. He also has affections for several stuffed animals that must all be present before bed. DS2 has latched on to a half blankie/half stuffed animal that his brother gives to him whenever he cries, and a blankie I use when we nurse.
DS sort of has a lovey, but only wants it at bedtime or naptime. It's an alligator pillow pet he calls "mimi" I have no idea why! He sort of attached himself to it after I weaned him a month ago. He needed something else to comfort him, even though I lay right next to him when he goes to sleep. DS is 23 months old. I don't really know if he needs it though since I haven't tried to put him down without it. I'd say if your kiddo is nursing, and you use that for comfort, he may not attach himself to a lovey until he is weaned. Not a bad thing in my book though!
DH(9/04) DS(12/08) and DD(5/11)
DS has had a lovey since he turned 1. It's a little soft blanket with a plush animal head attached. He now has 3 and snuggles with them when sleeping.
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" ~~ MLK
DS's lovey is one of my old T-shirts (I have finally accepted that I'm not getting it back *sigh*). The good news is that if he gets tired of carrying it around, he's more than willing to put it on like a dress.
If it looks like I'm trying to pick a fight... I'm not, I'm rarely that obvious.
I think I am definitely my 18 month old's "lovey". She has recently started being affection toward stuffed animals (giving them hugs and kisses) but she doesn't seem particularly attached or comforted by them. Which is funny, because as a child I had a blanket and teddy bear I was very attached too. I've wondered if nursing this long has an effect on this? (Which is perfectly fine, just something I've thought about!)
Yep, I am also my daughter's lovey. She is 2.5 and has never been interested in toys or lovey objects at all. It's all Mama all the time. If I give her anything at bedtime to snuggle with, she throws it out of the bed.
Mama to a bright 7 y/o girl and an exuberant 3 y/o boy Loving unschooling, 2x and natural living in Hawaii.
I tried to get my DD to pick a lovey for when I went back to work when she was 15 months old, but she wasn't interested. Like others have said, my boobs are her lovies, which is great, but I did want her to have a transitional object to help her when Grandma or Auntie or DP were with her and putting her to bed, when my boobies were several miles away. We started to include Bear in our bedtime and nap routines, and over time, he's become her sleeping buddy (and so ours too as we cosleep). She doesn't have anything that she carries around all the time or 'needs' to have, but Bear is part of her bedtime routine, which helps immensely. She also brings along Mia, a knitted kitten, when we go out. She puts her in a sling (playsilks work great for this), and nurses her, which is so sweet!
My DD is the same way. She just turned three, and about 5 months ago I tried to introduce the idea of a lovey to start transitioning away from me HAVING to be there for her to fall asleep. I used a toy that was already one of her favorites, and after about 4 days she started making the association with the toy & bed... and would scream bloody murder and run away every time she saw it, regardless of whether it was bedtime or not. So I didn't touch the thing for almost 2 weeks before she would even go near it. Now it's back to being one of her favorite toys, but not what I would call a lovey.