Woudl you let your toddler wear footie pajamas to Target? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 190 Old 02-23-2011, 08:35 PM
 
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I just feel that, if other people that I see when I leave the house are important enough to see me when I look my best, then my family is too.  I feel more awake and ready to go, if we were invited somewhere or had to go out, then we are ready and I don't have to rush around to get everyone ready.  I think that it's a good habit to have, and one worth teaching to my children.

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What is the purpose of getting dressed if you aren't going anywhere? I am genuinely curious. It's not like anyone is gonna see you in your pj's or anything. And sometimes it's nice to just hang out in them.



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#62 of 190 Old 02-23-2011, 09:22 PM
 
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haha, I saw this thread earlier and was all "I'm going back later to post that pajamas are for in the house!!!!" And then ds was going potty and missed and splashed pee on his jeans, and then I discovered that every single pair of jeans in the house was dirty.

 

So guess what ds wore to the store this afternoon? You guessed it. Brown and green dinosaur pants, with a blue hoodie and black and red jordans. No socks or underwear, either. If it had not been a case of HAVING to drop dp off at work and HAVING to go buy disposable diapers for dd because right now we can't wash anything I would not have taken him out looking like that.

 

I generally DO make him change into at least sweats or track pants or something comfy but not straight up pajamas. But obviously, things happen and I don't think going out in footed pj's really THAT serious.


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#63 of 190 Old 02-23-2011, 09:41 PM
 
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No.

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#64 of 190 Old 02-23-2011, 10:01 PM
 
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I would let them, but I wouldn't let them walk around the parking lot or store without shoes on. They do pj day at least a couple of times a year at the local public school, and at different preschools, so I don't think anyone would notice beyond commenting "Oh, must be pajama day at school!" 

 

I've taken both kids out a couple of times this winter in footie pjs/nightgown, coat and snow pants, snow boots, hat and gloves. Of course, no one can tell under all the winter gear, so no comments!

 

They're warm enough, and it was the fastest way to get the dog out for a walk in the morning. Her kidneys are failing so she has to go out much more frequently and if DH is out of town or can't do it in the morning due to leaving at the crack of dawn...


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#65 of 190 Old 02-23-2011, 10:09 PM
 
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lol, love this!

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Originally Posted by Chamomile Girl View Post

My kid can wear whatever he wants. Dress codes...ALL dress codes are lame and society should bite me.



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#66 of 190 Old 02-23-2011, 10:17 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mrspineau View Post


I just feel that, if other people that I see when I leave the house are important enough to see me when I look my best, then my family is too.  I feel more awake and ready to go, if we were invited somewhere or had to go out, then we are ready and I don't have to rush around to get everyone ready.  I think that it's a good habit to have, and one worth teaching to my children.


 

 

The second part make a bit of sense. The first though, not really. I get dressed before leaving the house because the people I meet when I do leave aren't important enough to be allowed to see me in my pj's. (Neighbours not withstanding, they get to see my pajama's when I go get the mail.)
 


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#67 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 03:26 AM
 
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Totally would have let her wear them. *shrug* this is def one of those issues I tend to let go.

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#68 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 04:32 AM
 
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See now I feel like, why should my family be reserved for my scruffy lazy look?

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The second part make a bit of sense. The first though, not really. I get dressed before leaving the house because the people I meet when I do leave aren't important enough to be allowed to see me in my pj's. (Neighbours not withstanding, they get to see my pajama's when I go get the mail.)
 



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#69 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 07:19 AM
 
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It's a danger and germ thing for me. Danger because he could step on anything, and what if it was glass from something that broke in the grocery store, I mean, anything. What if some kid had a potty accident and they hadn't come to clean it up yet? That would just GROSS me out if he stepped in something like that. I'm sorry, I'd allow jammies, but shoes would have to be worn. I also don't like my kiddo to walk outside barefoot unless it's at home for the same reason. But then again my son's only 2, and doesn't have much of an opinion about it yet, so I may change my mind if it becomes a power struggle, of course :)

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Can I ask why all of you said as long as she wore shoes? My toddler barely ever wears shoes...Just if she's walking around outside, and even then she still doesn't as long as the ground is ok...She's much more happier wearing just something on her feet like footie jammies or just socks. Is this a danger or germ thing?




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#70 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 07:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mrspineau View Post


I just feel that, if other people that I see when I leave the house are important enough to see me when I look my best, then my family is too.  I feel more awake and ready to go, if we were invited somewhere or had to go out, then we are ready and I don't have to rush around to get everyone ready.  I think that it's a good habit to have, and one worth teaching to my children.


 


 

My sister is this way too.  Everyone in the house is dressed before they come down for breakfast.  That would drive me crazy.  I love lounging around in comfy clothes.  She just doesn't feel awake and like she can start her day though until she's dressed and her hair is done.  And before you think she's change her mind once she has a few kids - she has 4 boys 5 and under!

 

The shirt she ended up putting on yesterday (that she originally didn't want to wear) instead of wearing her jammies has been on her since and she is now running around in just it and underwear. shrug.gif


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#71 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 08:39 AM
 
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Quote:

Originally Posted by CrunchyChristianMama View Post

 

My sister is this way too.  Everyone in the house is dressed before they come down for breakfast.  That would drive me crazy.  I love lounging around in comfy clothes.  She just doesn't feel awake and like she can start her day though until she's dressed and her hair is done.  And before you think she's change her mind once she has a few kids - she has 4 boys 5 and under!

 

The shirt she ended up putting on yesterday (that she originally didn't want to wear) instead of wearing her jammies has been on her since and she is now running around in just it and underwear. shrug.gif


 

Priorities. Fighting about clothing is not one of mine.  DH and I both like to be comfy too, although he thinks it is distasteful for me to leave the house in anything that resembles pajama pants. I think it is inappropriate for him to wear flip flops when it is below 40 degrees, so we accomodate each other.  To each his own, right?


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#72 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 08:41 AM
 
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I would totally let her wear pajamas to target.


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#73 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 08:54 AM
 
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yes.  with shoes or boots/whatever.  but my parenting choices tend to run along the lines of "forgodsakesanythingbutscreamingyesyesyes"


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#74 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 09:07 AM
 
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My child can wear whatever he wants, I don't care and I don't want to fight about it, seriously - and he is only 2 as well.  So far we haven't had this issue, but I really don't see it as an issue if it does come up.  And honestly there are times I just leave him in his jammies and we go all sorts of places.  There's no way I can stop my child from wanting to wear jammies to the store anyways, because I will wear my jammies to the store as well (and I'm talking about polka dot / dream girl / crazy colored jammes!)

 

I've never been one to care about what society thinks they can dictate I should or shouldn't be wearing, and neither has my DH.  We were skateboarding punk rockers in H.S. with multi colored hair, tattoos, crazy clothes, etc anyways so I can only HOPE my children have just as much creativity when it comes to their clothing choices too.  I believe our clothes, and our hair, are ways to express ourselves and our creativity.  A child can be outrageous or creative for only so long with their clothes choices anyways before they need to grow up and be adults and go to work in their suits or ties or khakis or highheels, etc. 

 

I remember at my Grandpa's funeral, my brother was lik 3-4 or something.  My mom had a suit for him to wear but he refused to wear the dress shirt.  So he went to the funeral in suit pants and coat with a tie dye t-shirt underneath instead.  He was fine, the world didn't end, no one made negative comments, and he isn't emotionally disturbed now that he's an adult. 


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#75 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 09:52 AM
 
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Can some one please explain to me how pajamas are "inside" clothes and sweats and tee are "outside clothes"? headscratch.gif  I get the footie part of a small child's jammies not being acceptable footwear in rain/snow, etc but how are other styles of children's PJ's unacceptable in public?

 

And why can you wear "outside" clothes indoors but not "inside" clothes outdoors?

 

 

 

 


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#76 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 11:07 AM
 
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I don't necessarily get the "inside clothes" and "outside clothes" thing either, barring footies for outside walking of course.  How is a pj set for a kiddo really all that different from a t-shirt and stretchy pants for a kiddo, for example?  It has to do with others' expectations.  I think anyone who is bothered by seeing a toddler in pjs needs more to do with their time, personally...

 

I did want to come back to respond to the if-we-don't-teach-proper-behavior-at-2-when-will-we-this-is-what's-wrong-with-coddled-youth-today thing.  My 3.5 year-old may wear pajamas for days on end, asserting her choices for her body, but she is a kind child, polite, considerate of others, says "thank you Daddy" when she is asleep at night and he pulls her covers back up... I think my time and energy has been much better invested teaching her and modeling her these traits than fighting daily over trying to control *her body*.  I don't think society is going to come screaming to a halt if we don't force our toddlers into "appropriate" attire.  If it really matters, like a wedding, I explain to her that because it is a very special time, it will make people she cares about happy to see her in desired attire, or that wearing her pajamas might make them sad, and she changes with alacrity.  I am not prepared to try and tell her society's whims are more important than her deep cares on a regular basis though.  As long as she's covered and safe, I'm fine with her wardrobe choices. 

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#77 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 11:23 AM
 
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My kids wear pjs to the store sometimes, too.  Mostly, though, we don't.  I agree that people ought to look presentable when you are out and about.  And I try to look presentable for my dh by the time he comes home.  I have 4 littles, too, though, and somedays I just try to switch to new pajamas before I go to bed.  It's just life, whatever. 

 

But, to me the issue with your morning isn't about whether or not it was okay to wear pajamas to Target.  The issue was how you want your interactions to go with your dd.  If she was being hysterical and impossible, I wouldn't have let it go without a serious discussion.  I think those interactions set us up for more like it.  Yes, I know she's two.  I am on my third two year old, and I know that they can be unreasonable.  But, I don't have kids that throw fits all over the place either.  We just don't do that around here.  I think they ought to be allowed to express their opinions, and mine all do.  But they do it nicely, and if they don't, we don't talk.  And two is not too young to learn that either.

 

Just my two cents.


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#78 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 11:24 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CrunchyChristianMama View Post





 

My sister is this way too.  Everyone in the house is dressed before they come down for breakfast.  That would drive me crazy.  I love lounging around in comfy clothes.  She just doesn't feel awake and like she can start her day though until she's dressed and her hair is done.  And before you think she's change her mind once she has a few kids - she has 4 boys 5 and under!

 

The shirt she ended up putting on yesterday (that she originally didn't want to wear) instead of wearing her jammies has been on her since and she is now running around in just it and underwear. shrug.gif



Uhm...your sister?  :D


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#79 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 11:33 AM
 
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With a typical child- yup, I would have no problem letting them stay in their jammies to go to the store once in awhile.

 

With my ds- NO WAY. Why? Because he has autism and when he does it once he thinks it's okay to do allll the time and then it goes further and further until it's no longer socially acceptable. THEN it's harder than h*ll to get him back to wearing clothes. Take, for instance, an example from when he was in preschool (age 5). He was having a lot of sensory/autism issues and wouldn't wear pants. He just wanted to wear some of his flannel pj bottoms. His teacher said "no problem". However, that soon evolved into wearing pj pants and tops. And then he wouldn't wear those pj pants, he would only wear the tight cotton pj's. With no underwear underneath. And then he wouldn't wear socks. Or shoes. Only slippers. It was a HUGE downhill slope for him and it took us quite awhile to dig our way out of that (it was NOT appropriate for him to be wearing the tight cotton pj's with no underwear on to school). It took a couple weeks of being super mean and hardcore (his therapist came in every day and worked with him the entire time he was at preschool for almost 2 weeks until he accepted that he had to wear the clothes and shoes) but eventually we got him wearing clothes again. Our rule now is that pj's are for in the house, clothes must be worn outside the house. No if's, and's or butt's. The ONLY time we stretch this rule is if ds is ill and going to the dr or when he's been admitted to the hospital (a couple times over the past couple years).


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#80 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 12:51 PM
 
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If DD is wearing clothes I'm happy.  If it's jeans and a sweater or snowman footy jammies and a tutu I don't care.  I do make her put shoes on though.  I refuse to fight about clothes unless it's a safety issue, like shoes in parking lots. 


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#81 of 190 Old 02-24-2011, 01:36 PM
 
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I love the idea of having transitions for bedtime that signal the day has come to an end: we get into our jammies and go to sleep. It's morning time, so we wake up and get dressed. Typically, this is what I've always strived to achieve. BUT, really, if a toddler is sick or cranky or whatever and really wants to wear xyz out to the store, I don't give a second thought about what anyone else is thinking. The people who are thinking "bad" things about me would be thinking even worse if I brought said toddler into the store SCREAMING about not being able to wear pjs. To me, it's all about knowing our children, picking our battles to reinforce our family's values and whatever feels best to our personal comfort level. I actually avoid Target with toddlers in tow to begin with so kudos to Elizabeth for braving the trip to begin with! 


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#82 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 04:49 AM
 
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I don't find pajamas to be socially unacceptable. I find it odd that anyone would. I wear them in public all the time. I have never heard of "inside clothes", lol. .

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#83 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 05:08 AM
 
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No, I would not.

 

I think georgia summed it up really well. The day has a rhythm: in the morning, we get dressed. (And that could be sweats/costume/track pants, whatever) and at night we put on our pj's and go to sleep.

 

But my eldest never wanted to wear anything unusual outside of the house and the youngest is only one, it's not a battle I've ever had to fight. That said, I live in France and I have never, ever seen a child outside in pj's.

 

Beyond all of that, I think it's kind of gross to wear something outside all day then sleep in it in my bed. Maybe I'm a closet germaphobe. Also, we walk almost everywhere, it rains a lot, things get muddy, get dog poop on them, etc. So to me there are very big differences between what we wear outside and what we wear to bed.

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#84 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 06:08 AM
 
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I would, although it's never come up.  I need the aforementioned rhythm to *my* day so I get dressed in the morning, even if it's just into a clean pair of yoga pants, and DS1 likes to do what I'm doing so he gets dressed too.  He also usually manages to get his pajamas amazingly filthy during breakfast.  If he did wear jammies all day (like yesterday when we were sick and stayed inside) we put clean jammies on before actually going to bed.


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#85 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 08:06 AM
 
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Yes, I would let her wear footie pajamas to Target.  I'll even go as far as saying that I'd let the older kids wear them if they wanted.  WHO CARES?  As long as the socially required bits are covered and it's seasonally appropriate?  Really?

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#86 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 09:25 AM - Thread Starter
 
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It's not a comfort factor at all for her.  It's her intense love of her monkey jammies.  Well, anything with monkeys on it actually.  She has 3 pair of pjs that have monkeys on them and one regular shirt that gets worn at least a couple days a week.


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My DH discussed this the other night and here's the conclusion we came to.  Who cares what she wears to Target?  I don't when it really comes down to it.  The only way I would have made her change would be if I told her that she needed to and then she threw a fit about it.  That's not an appropriate response in our house to a directive.  As it was, all I said was, "here's some clothes honey" and she responded that she wanted to leave her monkey pjs on.  She ended up changing without another word from me on her own, so it became a non-issue.


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#88 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 01:12 PM
 
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sure.  ds is at preschool in pj pants right now.  Mostly because he insisted on wearing "clothes" to bed and then wet the bed and I switched him into pj pants and then he woke up "claiming" they were day time pants so therefore he could wear them to school.  I love little kids's logic.

 

The only reason I try to get ds out of footies and into two piece clothes is because he is potty trained and one piece clothes are a pain in the *** for pottying (esp in public).

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#89 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 01:45 PM
 
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The only time I left DS leave the house in PJ's was when he had HFMD and we were going to the doctor.

I wouldn't allow it for all the reasons other people posted. We just don't leave the house in PJ's. PJ's for sleeping/lounging... clothes for leaving the house. There was a brief time when I did the whole 'pick your battles' thing. Deliberating on which argument I wanted to have. And it was exhausting. It's like nobody knew what the rules were anymore.

So now, things are a whole lot simpler. There is just no debate with something like wearing PJ's to Target. We save our battles for bigger things. I just don't have the patience to let a 2 year old decide what they're going to wear. I mean she can pick reasonable things. But when she comes out with her dora swimsuit (like this morning) the answer is "no. That's for the beach. Go find some jeans!".

If I see a child at the grocery store in PJ's I think it was either a battle the mom didn't want to fight (not a big deal) or that the mom couldn't be bothered to dress her child that morning. Again, not a big deal.

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#90 of 190 Old 02-25-2011, 02:04 PM
 
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Just curious, at what point in time did pjs not become clothes? If I'm wearing pj's I'm not naked or anything right? (Well, ok half the time my pj's are naked but that's beyond the point).

 

PJ's are a type of clothing. (So are swim suits BTW and something you see people of all ages wearing out to shop, etc around here in the warmer weather). Of course you do see people out in PJ's around here too.

 

I love the ideas that DS comes up with, as much as I love the outfits DD comes up with, because he doesn't care what the "normal" use for something is. The only limit I put up is that underwear cannot be worn on the head (not an issue with DS yet, but have had the conversation when DD was little), and you have to ask if you want to wear something that belongs to another person.


malesling.GIFMutant Papa to DD (12)hippie.gif and DS (2)babyf.gif, married to DHribbonrainbow.gif
If it looks like I'm trying to pick a fight... I'm not, I'm rarely that obvious.hammer.gif
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