Taking forever to get out of the house- routines - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 10 Old 07-30-2012, 06:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So I have noticed especially in the last month or so it is taking forever to get out of the house with my almost 2 year old.  It can take up to a half hour to get into the car to go somewhere!  It feels as if I am just chasing him around the house and only able to get him to do one thing at a time- sit on potty, get dressed, shoes, etc and then he runs off.  I have tried just telling him he needs to come and get shoes on/pee on potty/whatever the next step is and I just sit and wait.  That works sometimes but often there is a time crunch going on and I cannot wait all day.  I have also asked him to help me pack his bag, get his shoes, etc which works for about one thing. It is even happening if we are going somewhere he wants to go such as the park, playdate, pool, whatever it may be.  I have made a point not to actually chase after him because he will really love that and make it a game.  I just kind of follow him from room to room and end up getting frustrated that it has taken so long.  I was thinking of making some kind of a chart with visuals of what we/he has to do when we are going somewhere.  I am a Special Ed teacher so that idea is a normal thing to me and I was wondering if it's too much/strict/routine for a 2 year-old or would be a helpful tool.  Does your toddler also do this- strategies, ideas, suggestions please.

 

Thanks in advance

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#2 of 10 Old 07-31-2012, 04:49 AM
 
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It's age appropriate behavior from what I've read. Actually between 30-36 months seems to be the most resistance for change and transitions (new sibling, moving home, new caretaker can be very difficult at this stage). As per transitions though, I have a 33 m.o. and a wise mom once said allow at least 20 extra minutes, but I find it's more like 40 minutes extra. I often use a phrase such as "finish up please, we will be leaving soon" or "which toys would you like to bring along in the car?" (sometimes we take an arm load but hey it works) then my last tactic is something to carry "please call Daddy on my phone" (carry tot to car while he dials). Creative diversions really seem helpful.

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#3 of 10 Old 07-31-2012, 05:00 AM
 
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We are taking 40-45 extra minutes to get out of the house nowadays--and it drives me up the wall.  DS, 27 months is potty learning (he is dry/clean in just shorts all day--wears diapers for sleep) and IF (and only if) we are home, sitting on the potty can take an hour and he DOES NOT want to get off the potty until he has peed AND pooped.  He doesn't seem to get that he may not have to poop yet and he can get back on the potty if he needs to.  If we are out, he will quickly pee and we can move on.  I would love ideas for what to do about this.  But, OP, I'm kind of relieved that other folks have as much of a struggle getting out of the house--it's particularly frustrating b/c often I want to get out of the house so we can do something I know he'll love!  


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#4 of 10 Old 08-01-2012, 10:05 AM
 
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#5 of 10 Old 08-01-2012, 10:12 AM
 
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It takes ages to get a kid that age out the door. I start working on stuff way before. Get everything done early I can, and then maybe 10 to 15 minutes before we go head to the potty and get shoes on. But everything else I might be working on way ahead of time - packing whatever I need, etc. I don't think there is a way to hurry a toddler. You should probably factor the time in when you make your plans for the day.
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#6 of 10 Old 08-01-2012, 08:29 PM
 
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I agree with mamazee, it's just part of the deal. I have made the mistake of saying "we'll meet you right after her nap". Well she is 16 months old so it's potty, chasing naked bum with diaper, nursing, downstairs, snack, chasing grubby face with a wipe, pack bag, change outfit, potty again, chase bum with diap and on a good day 45 mins later we are fighting to get into the car. The only time savings I can think of is to pack everything early and load the car/stroller early. I just learned to incorporate the delay into my plans. She is at the stage where she has all the ambition to do EVERYTHING herself but with very little skill or coordination. My very sweet and super practical MIL has started laying down a tarp under her booster chair when we visit eat.gif
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#7 of 10 Old 08-02-2012, 09:41 AM
 
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Ha ha!  So I'm not the only one!  If we aren't in a time crunch, I try to let 18-month-old DS bring me his shoes when he's ready (I keep saying "Bring me your shoes so we can go in the car") because I think it's really good for him to have some control over what he does and when.  But there are those times where we are in a time crunch so I pick him up and put them on and tell him that I need to put his shoes on because we need to hurry and get in the car.  I guess I feel like it's a balance of starting to let him decide some things himself but also know that sometimes, he doesn't get to choose.  DS gets up at 9am and naps around 1-3 so I often feel like the morning is the only time we can get out of the house but by the time we have breakfast and both get dressed, a lot of times it's close to 11 and we never make it out of the house!  Some days I feel like a lazy mom and some days I just feel like this is "life with a toddler!"


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4 years and 5 IVF cycles in the making, Elliott was born at home in water on 2/2/11.
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#8 of 10 Old 08-02-2012, 03:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by gemasita View Post

Ha ha!  So I'm not the only one!  If we aren't in a time crunch, I try to let 18-month-old DS bring me his shoes when he's ready (I keep saying "Bring me your shoes so we can go in the car") because I think it's really good for him to have some control over what he does and when.  But there are those times where we are in a time crunch so I pick him up and put them on and tell him that I need to put his shoes on because we need to hurry and get in the car.  I guess I feel like it's a balance of starting to let him decide some things himself but also know that sometimes, he doesn't get to choose.  DS gets up at 9am and naps around 1-3 so I often feel like the morning is the only time we can get out of the house but by the time we have breakfast and both get dressed, a lot of times it's close to 11 and we never make it out of the house!  Some days I feel like a lazy mom and some days I just feel like this is "life with a toddler!"


Hah - I've taken to just plopping her in the car barefoot and I slap her shoes on her while she's still strapped in before we get out of the car :)

 

Yes, we're very much in the same boat.  Everything takes forever.  We get up at 6:30 a.m. and are ready to leave the house at...9:30 or 10.  The whole prepping-eating-cleaning breakfast part of our day takes over an hour.  DD likes to "help."  And "keep me company."  So my own business take almost as long as hers!  I'm thinking there's no real way around it without sacrificing something (i.e. skip the breakfast dishes, use the drier that day instead of the line, etc.).  Really frustrating, though.  It's really challenging my view of what constitutes a "day."  Dressing, cooking, eating, etc.  That's what we DO. 

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#9 of 10 Old 08-03-2012, 05:18 AM
 
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I started using the kitchen timer a couple of days ago--I tell him how much time he/we have and then let the timer deliver the bad news ;)  It's working pretty well--mostly because turning off the beeping timer is something he thinks is fun to do, so he will stop what he's doing to do it (we'll see how long that works!)

 

We also get into the car barefoot...thumb.gif


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#10 of 10 Old 08-05-2012, 10:41 PM
 
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Things that help us get out the door quicker:

I put her shoes on while she is sitting on the potty.

I make sure our bag is fully packed and ready to go and sitting by the door.

If I know it is going to be a busy fun week, I will make sure to cut up fruit and snacks that we can quickly grab and put in the bag at a moments notice. 

I lay her clothes out  and get her excited to get dressed..'let's put your swimsuit on so we can go swimming!' or ' let's put your play dress on so we can go meet your friends at the park!'. She usually gets so excited that she can't get dressed fast enough. 

If I know she has been favoring her raggedy ann doll all week, I will place it next to our bag and as we are walking out the door I will tell her something like, 'don't forget to grab your doll, so she can have fun with you at the park!"...she usually smiles and runs to her doll.  

 

We usually get out of the house pretty quickly.  There are times when she putters around but usually she is so excited to get to her destination that she cooperates without hesitation.  

 


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