How much quiet time do you do with your no-napper? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 09-23-2012, 10:47 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My 2.5 year old DD dropped naps just after her second birthday.  Nowadays we tend to do a quiet time during the day which consists of about 45 minutes together in her room reading books and snuggling, followed by her watching a show while I make lunch.  I find that the quiet time, while good for both of us, really doesn't do anything to ameliorate her afternoon tiredness.  She starts yawning by 4 p.m. and it's all I can do most days to get her through to a 6:00 bedtime.  I guess my issue with all this is, our days just feel so SHORT.  Quiet time, unlike a nap, takes up 1.5 hours of our precious 12 hours of awake time during the day.  Does anyone else with a no-napping 2 year old feel adding quiet time makes the day soooooo short?  If it doesn't really make her less tired, is it actually worth it?  And how long will it be before I feel like it's TRULY acceptable for her not to nap (i.e. she's not obviously tired from 11:00 a.m. on, and a total mess by bedtime)? 

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#2 of 6 Old 09-24-2012, 06:00 AM
 
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I think most humans need some down-time in every day, if possible. I don't see anything wrong with what you're doing now. Maybe I didn't understand your question..??
 


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#3 of 6 Old 09-24-2012, 07:28 AM
 
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I'm not there yet but 1.5 hours a day seems pretty ideal to me. It lets you have a break/get something done. Anything much shorter may not be effective. FWIW my DD will often take 30 to 45 just to fall asleep and sleeps 75 to 90 minutes on average. She's a rare morning napper and it really limits what we can do socially. I'm sticking with what works even if that means no classes or play groups, just random walks around the neighbourhood or to the library when they fit in our schedule.
While it may not look like she gets much rest, I bet she would be more miserable if you skipped it. The odd day when my DD can't nap, I make a point of snuggling with her in a dark, quiet room anyways for 30 to 45 minutes (as long as she will let me). On days where she isn't willing to do even that (very very rare), she is an absolute mess - tantrums over the least little thing, zero patience to play, I can't set her down for a single second, etc. If you feel like quiet time is interfering with your activities, maybe try it earlier or later. I would keep it though - especially the snugly reading time. It's a great chance to connect with your daughter and makes quality time a high priority. One option is to switch the show she watches to a shorter one. You could also make storytime a full hour, drop the TV and have her help you make lunch. Hth
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#4 of 6 Old 09-24-2012, 04:38 PM
 
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Things are a little different for us as i don't do her quiet time with her so for me i am like YAY QUIET TIME! (I.E. ME TIME) My DD is a usually non-napping 31 MO but she is still in a crib so just like when we did nap i do the same thing with leaving her in her crib in the dark with some stuffies and binky  (for one hour) but i go in my own room and read or take a quick nap. If she isn't asleep within the hour (usually not) i get her up. I know this will change in a few months though once she is in a toddler bed and my plan is to just put a gate up in her room & maybe set a timer.

 

Since you do her quiet time WITH her don't you think you will miss the snuggle time if you give it up? I know i do now that she sleeps on her own. I totally agree though that a quiet time does little if nothing to help with the 4pm tiredness. For us i almost feel like it knocks her out of her adrenaline rush and makes her MORE tired then she would be if i just let her keep running but since she still naps every few days i am sticking with this method for now since i know she still needs an occasional nap.

 

Maybe you could do quiet time on some days (when there is nothing better to do) and skip it on days when there is a class or event going on that you don't want to miss?

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#5 of 6 Old 09-24-2012, 06:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by P.J. View Post

I think most humans need some down-time in every day, if possible. I don't see anything wrong with what you're doing now. Maybe I didn't understand your question..??
 

 

Maybe I didn't understand my question.... :) 

 

I think I'm just still having a hard time with the no-napping thing.  Just when I think I'm zen with it I realize that it still really annoys me that she won't just nap when she's clearly tired from 11 a.m. until 4 p.m. and then totally loopy from then until bedtime. 

 

What I was really trying to get at in my question is that the 1.5 hour quiet time that I do with DD seems like an awful lot of sedentary time for an energetic little person to have (all in a row!) in their short waking hours.  So then I feel like we have to really go-go-go during the rest of the day to make up for it.  Does that make sense?  Whereas a nap is part of the child's sleep time, so then it seems like it's okay to have some normal sedentary moments in the course of their 12 hours of awake time in addition to the nap. 

 

skycheattraffic - Much as I wish we could skip the TV part, I would go bazonkers without it.  And I think you're right that she probably would be even more volatile in the evening without that rest time.  Yikes.  I wouldn't want to see that!

 

KellyandBean - Oh, how I wish that I could get a solo quiet time from her, but this child just LIVES to interact.  I'm lucky if I can get 2 minutes of independent play out of her during the day.  Our attempts at solo time have so far been as disastrous as our napping battles.  So, for now, we rest together.  We DO have parallel reading time for the first 5 - 10 minutes, and she's doing well with that.  It's a start, at least.  I do think I might miss the snuggle time with her.  Reminds me of the days we used to do car naps and I was kind of glad to be stuck in the car where I couldn't rush around doing chores during my "down time." 

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#6 of 6 Old 09-24-2012, 06:35 PM
 
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I would look at the 1.5 hours as a time to recharge. She is conscious but resting, recovering from a busy morning. I wouldn't worry about her being sedentary for that time because (if she's anything like mine) she is on the go the rest of the time. I don't think it's necessary for her to be constantly in motion her entire waking time. Some important/fun things are necessarily low energy like reading, building with blocks, eating, folding laundry with mommy, colouring, etc. As long as she gets good opportunities every day for energetic play she will not turn into someone who isn't active. just my two cents
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