At wit's end with almost four-year old - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Thread Tools
#1 of 1 Old 10-24-2012, 07:34 AM - Thread Starter
Starfish11's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 2,573
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Serenity now!  My DD turns four at the end of November.  She's always been a focused, independent spirit and super sweet.  So much so, that folks that know her marvel at how lovely she is in terms of being kind to others and a very loving little girl. 


Recently, though, she has started using words and phrases that are just not ok with us as her parents.




I don't like you!

I hate you, Wyatt! (her little brother)

You can't say that to me!

You don't get to do that.

I WILL do it. (after being instructed to modify her behavior)

Mommy, you are NOT nice!


Plus she has started to swing at me and often makes contact.  When she does hit me she immediately says she is "sorry" but the behavior continues. 


I know that words and actions right now have power for the little ones as they start to realize how what they do and say cause reactions.  I get that it's developmentally appropriate.  What I don't know is how I should react.  I've tried ignoring it, I've tried talking to her about it using feeling terms, e.g. it hurts Mommy when you hit her.  And we've sat and given her mommy and daddy time while talking to her about how she can express herself differently.  When she makes sweeping statements about "don't like" and "hate" I try and isolate actions from the entire dismissal, i.e. Wyatt took your doll and you don't like that he did that.


Still, the behavior is escalating to the point where I just need some feedback couched in advice :)

Walking in the light with DH, DD (11/08), DS (4/10) , four dogs, and one insouciant cat.
Starfish11 is offline  

Quick Reply
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:


Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.

User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page

Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off