Suddenly very clingy 17 month old - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 33 Old 05-10-2013, 06:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi all,

I'm hoping for some reassurance here. My son turned 17months a few days ago. For approximately the past 2 weeks he has become very very clingy to me, old fears have also re-emerged (e.g. the sound of the vacuum cleaner), and he is requesting to nurse almost constantly throughout the day unless he is very distracted. It was only 3 weeks ago when I was commenting to my husband about how independent he was becoming. Just wondering if anyone else has experienced this and whether it is (hopefully) a phase?
Thanks, SM
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#2 of 33 Old 05-10-2013, 12:29 PM
 
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It could be a growth spurt. Clinging, irritability, needing more food and sleep than usual are signs.
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#3 of 33 Old 05-10-2013, 12:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Possibly Aslago. Thanks. Hopefully!! :-)
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#4 of 33 Old 05-10-2013, 12:52 PM
 
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My son is doing the same thing and just turned 17 months. I even told my dh a few weeks ago how independant he was.
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#5 of 33 Old 05-10-2013, 01:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Really!! Wow! I wonder if it's a developmental thing ... a "wonder week" or weeks where they are making a mental leap? Or a growth spurt like the PP mentioned. It's a bit disconcerting to say the least!

How are you responding there? So far I'm going with it as calmly as i can, but it is very intense and I'm certainly not finding it easy. I try to keep him distracted when possible. So far my only rule is no nursing when mummy's eating. This rule caused a huge meltdown 2 evenings ago, but he's accepted it without tears since.

Oh I do hope it's a phase :-D
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#6 of 33 Old 05-10-2013, 04:54 PM
 
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I am just following him. Its mostly nursing a million times at night. I also trybto confine him to his high chair ifnhe is eating and god forbid let him watch baby einstien so ibcan maybe wash dishes that are becoming a biohazard.
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#7 of 33 Old 05-10-2013, 07:10 PM
 
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My DD went through a huge clingy/separation anxiety phase around 18 months. Then as suddenly as it started, it was over. She's 25 months now and gladly stays with my MIL while I go to my prenatal appointments. At 18 months, she would barely tolerate staying with daddy while I ran to the pharmacy.
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#8 of 33 Old 05-11-2013, 05:37 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks so much for sharing Skycheattraffic... Hope! :-D
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#9 of 33 Old 05-11-2013, 05:21 PM
 
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We're there/hopefully on the tail end.  Started around 16.5 mos, the week before we started in ISR lessons, so she has been lesss than thrilled to be in a pool with a stranger (even though she loves her teacher and talks happily about her all the time outside of lessons!) and now at 18mos is still slightly more reserved than in the past but is getting better about going to DH and not pitching a fit for me and throughout had never changed her attitude around people she knows well - friends and family - just not happy about new people and always asking for mommy!

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#10 of 33 Old 05-12-2013, 04:46 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Soooo interesting. 16.5m was our changing point too. Delighted for you PP that your DS has passed through the most intense part.

I don't think any of my friends with same aged kids are experiencing the same behaviours as us, but I've heard other behaviours mentioned around this age. I wonder if our experience of "the clingy-ness" is related to our kids particular temperment. My son is definitely a sensitive soul and has been very high need particularly in terms of sleep since the very beginning.... Just a thought..,
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#11 of 33 Old 05-13-2013, 07:24 PM
 
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Just wanted to add that we are going through this too and my ds turns 18mo tomorrow.  It started about 3 weeks ago and is just as you ladies are describing.  It's got a tiny bit better the past few days, but is still difficult.  What an exhausting phase!!


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#12 of 33 Old 05-14-2013, 06:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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It certainly is! I really look forward to being on the other side of this phase! Any time alone for longer than 3mins seems absolutely impossible / not worth the distress right now. It is reassuring to know we are not alone though! Hugs!!
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#13 of 33 Old 05-14-2013, 07:26 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by susanmary View Post

I wonder if our experience of "the clingy-ness" is related to our kids particular temperment. My son is definitely a sensitive soul and had been very high need particularly in terms of sleep since the very beginning.... Just a thought..,

I do think that comes into play.  As tough as my daughter is physically, she's very sensitive and emotional and was a SUPER needy/fussy baby.  She's absolutely horrible with teething too.  She can fall down and get a black eye (did this twice already), cry for less than 30seconds and go about her business, but get her cutting some teeth and she is just an absolute hot mess!  So when the clingy phase started I wasn't incredibly surprised and we're working through it.  Last night we both cried in bed from about 3am to just after 5 when she finally fell back asleep - the plus side of that is she finally cut a damn tooth and has 3 left to have a  full mouth and we're done for a while!!

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#14 of 33 Old 05-15-2013, 12:51 AM
 
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Thank god for this thread, i am touched out, nursed out, exhausted, my house is a mess. Rough phase. He is also really teething. I am right there with you sassyfirechick.

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#15 of 33 Old 05-15-2013, 05:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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We are teething on top of it all as well! My brain seems to be shutting down ... Earlier today I was on the phone to a shop sales assistant and said "love you" as I said goodbye!!! There are numerous other examples. I can't trust what comes out of my mouth! Hehe :-D I've become soooooo dizzy!
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#16 of 33 Old 05-15-2013, 05:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Tough night SFC! So glad the tooth has come through! No joy here yet and he only has 8 so far.

Hi LLQ...strength in numbers! :-)
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#17 of 33 Old 05-15-2013, 08:42 PM
 
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Teething here too!  I think my ds was stuck to my boob the entire night...I was in and out of consciousness and every time I woke up he was latched on.  I try not to drink coffee too much, but I've been drinking 2 cups now every morning just to get going!


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#18 of 33 Old 05-15-2013, 11:05 PM
 
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Teething here too!  I think my ds was stuck to my boob the entire night...I was in and out of consciousness and every time I woke up he was latched on.  I try not to drink coffee too much, but I've been drinking 2 cups now every morning just to get going!


I have been eating too much junk trying to stay awake.

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#19 of 33 Old 05-16-2013, 06:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Whatever gets us through ladies! We could be ingesting much worse ;-D

Two teeth have appeared on the top right here! Last night was a bit better.

He's still very clingy during the day, but the past 2 days he has requested to nurse slightly less throughout the day (he's pretty much usually an all night nurser).... so that's sort of heading in the desired direction.

Roll on this phase!!
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#20 of 33 Old 05-16-2013, 03:24 PM
 
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17mo old here too! Very independent typically, but has been all about Mama for about a week now. Clingy, whiny, all that fun stuff. He's getting molars & canines right now, and having massive developmental stuff going on... speech exploding, etc. I think we're heading into a wonder week, too, gotta check the book smile.gif
 

My sympathies, Mama!


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#21 of 33 Old 05-16-2013, 08:58 PM
 
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So today I went back into my old posts and found that I was complaining about the exact same thing at the exact same time with my first son who is now 7!  I attributed it at the time to a move we had recently done, but I guess that wasn't the case.  It seemed to clear up a bit shortly after 18 mo.  


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#22 of 33 Old 05-17-2013, 05:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Wonder weeks and teething combo! Our poor little ones really. I'm finding it very helpful to focus on the fact that ..."this too shall pass"! Being outdoors saves my sanity also mamas. :-)
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#23 of 33 Old 05-17-2013, 03:46 PM
 
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Outdoors IS a sanity saver!  DD took a nap the other weekend on the grass/blanket while I washed my car, guess she was lulled by all the neighbors mowing lawns :-)

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#24 of 33 Old 05-17-2013, 09:16 PM
 
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Outdoors IS a sanity saver!  DD took a nap the other weekend on the grass/blanket while I washed my car, guess she was lulled by all the neighbors mowing lawns :-)

 

Totally. We've been spending most days out of the balcony just hanging out. Those days are much easier!!


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#25 of 33 Old 05-17-2013, 09:53 PM
 
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Totally. We've been spending most days out of the balcony just hanging out. Those days are much easier!!


LMAO! Looks like I am cleaning the balcony tomorrow :)

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#26 of 33 Old 05-18-2013, 12:18 PM - Thread Starter
 
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:-D
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#27 of 33 Old 05-20-2013, 06:49 PM
 
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My son is 16.5 months and we've had these phases on and off for the last few months. It is typically teething with some developmental stuff thrown in and a dash of separation anxiety. I just try to roll with it and survive til bedtime lol. 

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#28 of 33 Old 05-21-2013, 01:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Other mums in the same boat ... How are you doing? I think we have a tiny bit of improvement here, just tiny really, and he certainly seems to have gone through a mental leap as we've now most certainly joined terrible two territory where he is realising that he is his own person but unfortunately for him he can't always get his own way. Rollercoaster days here!
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#29 of 33 Old 05-21-2013, 04:44 PM
 
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I agree I think its mental. He now is saying more words and more clearly. Also bed time is getting easier. He is also sitting in his high chair eating happily without me in eyeshot. I think it might be getting better. Also agree on the rampaging. He is decided destruction must occur at least twice an hour. My poor sliding glass door blinds.

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#30 of 33 Old 05-21-2013, 06:25 PM
 
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18.5 month old here taking his momma on a rollercoaster ride too...
I attribute my situation to cutting 4 teeth in 2.5 weeks (2 canine and 2 incisers)! I am also a bit of a hormonal mess so it is a positively challenging time.
Hugs and patience to you all.
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