Velcro Boy - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 9 Old 08-29-2013, 08:59 AM - Thread Starter
 
rainbowasylum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Boreal Handbasket
Posts: 566
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

I don't mind the clingy infant stage when they need you right there all the time.  But at 20 months he is too heavy to hold all the time.  I can wear him when we are out and about, but at  home he really only wants to be held on my lap.  My left arm is beginning to match that of a body builder.  

He is my youngest kiddo, but the others haven't been quite so attached and  clingy.  

I know it's a stage and soon enough he'll be off on his own.  In the meantime, I just needed a moment to know I am not alone. 

rainbowasylum is offline  
#2 of 9 Old 08-29-2013, 11:22 AM
 
prescottchels's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Swimming in essential oils
Posts: 1,639
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

It's totally normal AND it's ok for you to set limits w/him about needing breaks from holding him AND it's ok for him to express his disapproval of those limits winky.gif

Maybe a couple of these articles on encouraging independent play would be helpful 

http://www.janetlansbury.com/2013/05/stop-entertaining-your-toddler-in-3-steps-2/

 

http://www.janetlansbury.com/2012/11/7-myths-that-discourage-independent-play/


Former Nanny Extraordinaire, looking forward to being a Mama! treehugger.gif I love Organizing & being a Health & Wellness Coach eat.gif & I'm crunchy granola as long as it's organic and certified gluten free. GF since March '08 yummy.gif. Willoughby Nov '11  cat.gif TTC #1-still, again, some more, & seriously pondering adoption. 
prescottchels is online now  
#3 of 9 Old 08-29-2013, 12:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
rainbowasylum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Boreal Handbasket
Posts: 566
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

I love the articles, they are very much the approach we take in general.  My youngest, however, by virtue of being the youngest, probably is not as encouraged to do as much independently as the others have been.  I still think of him as the 'baby' and I suppose I need to give him a bit of a push to move beyond that place. really though, he only began walking a couple months ago, so I was holding out on toddlerhood until that happened. :)

rainbowasylum is offline  
#4 of 9 Old 08-29-2013, 12:34 PM
 
prescottchels's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Swimming in essential oils
Posts: 1,639
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

20 mon is still very young no matter how you look at it. There's always that balance thing going on for us as parents & caregivers of cherishing the sweetness of babyhood & encouraging growth & independence... love.gif


Former Nanny Extraordinaire, looking forward to being a Mama! treehugger.gif I love Organizing & being a Health & Wellness Coach eat.gif & I'm crunchy granola as long as it's organic and certified gluten free. GF since March '08 yummy.gif. Willoughby Nov '11  cat.gif TTC #1-still, again, some more, & seriously pondering adoption. 
prescottchels is online now  
#5 of 9 Old 08-30-2013, 05:19 AM
 
skycheattraffic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,699
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Subbing
skycheattraffic is offline  
#6 of 9 Old 09-01-2013, 01:42 PM
 
Gracecody's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Colorado
Posts: 573
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Just letting you know that I'm there with you! Mine is 23 mos and has been much more clingy the past 2 mos or so. To the point where he SCREAMS if I run (RUN) upstairs to get something quickly. Which is pretty much the only time we are apart. smile.gif he is the youngest of 3 and I do think I remember the other two going through something like this. For them it is also related to stranger anxiety as that ramped way up around the same time.
Gracecody is offline  
#7 of 9 Old 09-01-2013, 05:30 PM - Thread Starter
 
rainbowasylum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Boreal Handbasket
Posts: 566
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

I know the older kids have done a similar stage, but this little one takes the cake in terms of cling.  I think a lot of is it due to some family changes and relocation, probably at one of the most sensitive times in terms of security. 

rainbowasylum is offline  
#8 of 9 Old 09-01-2013, 06:36 PM
 
luckiest's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 647
Mentioned: 5 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 12 Post(s)

Another thought - if he only started walking recently, he could be a bit overwhelmed with his new powers of mobility and potential for exploration, and be needing to be closer to you while he adjusts.  There's a lot of expansion and contraction that goes on as their independence grows; he could just be in a contraction phase.  At any rate, it will pass, and it's totally okay to set limits on it in the meantime if you need to.




Living and loving in ATX with DH (of 7 years) and DS (3.5)
luckiest is online now  
#9 of 9 Old 09-02-2013, 05:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
rainbowasylum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Boreal Handbasket
Posts: 566
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

He's made great progress just today.  Apparently learning that he is capable of managing the stairs without help means he is much happier in general.  Toddlers are funny creatures.  He's still cling-on man, but less anxiously so today, anyway. 

rainbowasylum is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off