Taking children out to dinner... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 15 Old 05-22-2014, 06:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My latest blog post. I thought some of you would appreciate this...

 

http://www.blogher.com/take-two-children-out-dinner-25-easysteps?from=comments


Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. ~Dylan Thomas

 

<3 LBM <3 AHM <3

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#2 of 15 Old 05-22-2014, 08:58 PM
 
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Thanks, I found 23 most funny
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#3 of 15 Old 05-30-2014, 09:48 AM
 
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#23 and this one, too:

13) Locate and claim a table. Ignore the appalled looks of old couple nearby. Sorry, buddy, but if I have to pay your Social Security, you have to listen to my overtired kids for ten minutes.
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#4 of 15 Old 06-11-2014, 07:12 AM
 
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Sounds about right. Lol.
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#5 of 15 Old 06-16-2014, 05:26 AM
 
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great,I have to pay your Social Security, you have to listen to my overtired kids for ten minutes.thanks
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#6 of 15 Old 06-16-2014, 12:39 PM
 
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How about getting takeout??

Nobody today is truly paying the social security benefits of prior generations - read up on monetary reform and the actual use of social security funds and payouts by the US gov't.

Disrespecting the public spaces of others is not a right that is "purchased" in any case. Teaching children to respect others is a better approach for them and the adults they will become.
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Last edited by pumabearclan; 06-16-2014 at 05:15 PM.
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#7 of 15 Old 06-16-2014, 05:14 PM
 
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I know this was supposed to be funny but I really don't get it. I don't see how bribing your kids with treats, ruining dinner for others (including yourself) and expecting a line cook to be a waitress and deliver your food to a table is a joke.

If you are going to feed your kids food like that anyway (muffins, cookies, bagels) - why not use a drive through? If getting food to your table is such an issue - why not go to a casual sit down place like a diner or Friendly's? If they are tired and hungry after daycare to the point it's disruptive and unproductive to be out with them, why not order pizza or chinese or buy microwave meals? You write that the kids are not eating much, if anything there and you are being forced to scarf down your food.

It's very unfair to ask a food preparer that is probably overworked and underpaid to act as a waiter for you because you are unprepared.

It's insulting to say that you pay for others social security. See the pp's comment above. You make a snarky remark about seniors entitlement while asking for entitlement of your own because you have young kids. That's a very hypocritical statement.

Perhaps you need to think about and respect the needs and limitations of others, if you expect them to help you and sympathize with your situation.
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#8 of 15 Old 06-25-2014, 12:56 PM
 
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I would also recommend just getting take-out or delivery next time. Sounds like you're making everyone's dinner experience unpleasant (including the employees and YOUR OWN),and thinking it's funny. I'm not old and on Social Security, and I don;t appreciate families acting this way in restaurants I'm eating at. Maybe go to Chuck E Cheese or something similar if you really feel you must eat inside a restaurant.
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#9 of 15 Old 06-28-2014, 06:20 AM
 
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Whatever, I think it's great and very accurate when trying to juggle taking multiple kids out to eat...even when they are on good behavior. This is nothing that would bother me, or would have bothered me when I didn't have kids, and in fact I would be the one to help you with getting things situated at your table. I am in the camp of "it takes a village" and think that these days we all spend too much time judging and distancing each other. When I worked at a restaurant (which may actually be this one, some things you mentioned sound extremely familiar) if we saw someone struggling with multiple children we would automatically bring them their food to the table as well as grab a highchair for them as they went to sit down. No, it wasn't our job -- but it's courteous.

Moms shouldn't have to get takeout or eat at home just because it's hard to get in and out of the restaurant. Prime example, whenever my ex-husband and I separated and I was a single mom. I saved and scrimped to be able to provide for my family, and on the last day of every other month we all went out to eat. It was a way for me to feel "normal." We would literally turn in the change jar at the bank's counting machine and that was what we had to go out. Sometimes we had enough for something like Panera, other times it was Burger King. But it created some normalcy in our lives. My two kids were, at that time, 6m and 2.5 years old. Going out, even with them be very well behaved children, was a struggle. The blog post resonated with me hardcore. Yes we sometimes were a little louder and messier than the tables around us, but that was a special time for us and something my two year old looked forward to every single time we went. I just think we all need a little more love and understanding out there, we never know another person's struggles <3

~Christi~
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#10 of 15 Old 07-04-2014, 08:54 AM
 
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The tone of the original post put me off. It wasn't an expression of frustration or a plea for tolerance, to my opinion, it was a judgmental rant full of entitlement. If a parent knows that they may be disrupting the dining room then they can take the most discreet table, politely ask for extra help from the wait staff (and tip accordingly), prevent avoidable messes, and apologize to other diners if their children are staring at them over the back of the booth or frequently running past their table (and of course try to correct the behavior so that the children learn to respect others and appreciate the experience their parent is paying for).

If the original poster felt that the issue was unpleasant enough to rant about with such anger and blame then I still think that she should try takeout until she feels up to the challenge.

Good points, but it's not only moms but also the elderly, the injured, the rushed and preoccupied and depressed etc who may have challenges dining out but who also should try to do so without being angry or rude. Everyone has struggles, as you say, and respect goes both ways. I think that people generally are helpful and tolerant, but people aren't usually eager to be helpful and tolerant to people who don't give respect in return.
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#11 of 15 Old 07-07-2014, 12:08 PM
 
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Wow I forgot everyone on here is such perfect parents!!! It's a joke, try not being so judgmental! I admit the social security comment was a little mean, but I also don't feel the need to rip the OP apart. This Is supposed to be a site to be supportive and I have seen some of the previous posters on other threads with their negative opinions that are not needed!
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Last edited by apeydef; 07-07-2014 at 12:17 PM.
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#12 of 15 Old 07-07-2014, 02:26 PM
 
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I think that this site is incredibly supportive to mothers, all of us struggle, many share their struggles here. I haven't noticed any parents on mothering.com who claim to be perfect and I see tremendous bravery and openness among the members here in all ways, including the difficult discussions that occur. In particular I appreciate that members are willing to disagree and not just "support" any behavior of anyone simply because they are a mother, which doesn't help anyone, I think, especially not the children who learn from us. What I see happening here is that we are helping each other and learning from one another and to me that is real support not lip service.

Many of us did not think that this was an appropriate joke. If you did, OK. We don't all have to agree.

If you issues with what another member has said in other threads perhaps you could PM and try to work it out.
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#13 of 15 Old 07-07-2014, 02:32 PM
 
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You did not have to agree and I am not saying I did or didn't. But you and a few others attacked her! Also I did not say MDC was not supportive. That is opposite of what I said. You don't have to support her either just don't say anything if you don't gave anything nice to say. There is a difference in disagreeing and attacking.
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#14 of 15 Old 07-07-2014, 02:33 PM
 
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I'm also have noticed a pattern with some of the same people who are constantly starting attacks!
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#15 of 15 Old 07-07-2014, 03:02 PM
 
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I'm not seeing how anyone attacked her. We disagreed and stated why. No one said she was a bad mother or a bad person or anything insulting or demeaning or degrading or inflammatory at all. In fact I see that the responses to her blog post are all constructive and respectful of the OP and anyone else.

You said this was a site that was supposed to be supportive (but you feel it isn't? or you do?)

I'm very sorry if you personally felt attacked or offended by what I wrote. If it's me you are referring to then I would like to hear your comments rather than insinuation. You can PM me and we can talk about it. As I said I haven't noticed that anyone has been starting attacks or being hostile to any other member, not on this thread or on other threads so I frankly don't see what you mean, but that's OK.

Last edited by pumabearclan; 07-07-2014 at 03:08 PM.
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