Vacation Without Kids - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 07-07-2014, 05:22 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Smile Vacation Without Kids

Hello moms :-) I'm brand new here. I was looking for a fairly anonymous, unbiased place (ie NOT Facebook groups) to ask for a little advice or encouragement.

My fiancé and I are travelling next week for a conference on our 3 year olds neurological disorder. There are little resources where we live, so attending this conference is an opportunity that we cannot pass up!

Our son will be staying with his grandparents (paternal) for the first time. We will be gone for a week. They live out of town and only visit maybe once a month, if that, but they do FaceTime every night.

I know that he will be in great hands. The best possible hands other then our own...but I still have moments of extreme anxiety over the idea of leaving him

I'm afraid of the possibility of him missing us, or not understanding why we aren't there. We have never been away from him since he was born!

How do you moms who maybe take an adults only vacation a year, or travel for work, etc, handle leaving your little one/s home with family or friends other then their parent?
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#2 of 8 Old 07-07-2014, 12:09 PM
 
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I don't leave mine like that til age 4 but only you know if yours is ready. Of course they need plenty of visits beforehand with you present so they aren't almost strangers, visits every month or two plus Facetime is enough for my kids to know their paternal grandparents well. I gave Nana a detailed list of our routines so they know what the kids are used to. What kinds of things they eat and when, what they do for down time when they need a rest, bedtime routines. Include safety rules, sunscreen, car seats, water safety, etc. Also I would write up what I've found works as far as diffusing problem situations and disciplining them, and what behaviors come up lately that may need diffusing or disciplining. Mine have stayed twice with Nana and Granddad several days and had a great time both times. They played hard and wore themselves out and were remarkably happy and cooperative. They sent pictures a few times a day on my phone.
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#3 of 8 Old 07-07-2014, 12:47 PM
 
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Would one of them be willing to come with you so you don't have to leave him?
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#4 of 8 Old 11-23-2014, 02:29 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie O'Toole View Post
My fiancé and I are travelling next week for a conference on our 3 year olds neurological disorder. There are little resources where we live, so attending this conference is an opportunity that we cannot pass up!

This isn't a vacation, this is research to attempt to be the best parents possible and help him reach his full potential.

We didn't leave our kids at that age, but I can see why you are. I can also see why you are having a hard time leaving (I would too) but I think that focusing on his Best Good will get your through it. This isn't a selfish trip. This is FOR him.

If you were just going off to an island to relax, I'd write a very different post.

BTW, do you know that there is a Special Needs Board here on mothering? I have a DD with autism.

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#5 of 8 Old 11-24-2014, 06:27 AM
 
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Right, this is research to attempt to be the best parents possible and help him reach his full potential.thanks
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#6 of 8 Old Today, 01:10 PM
 
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Originally Posted by apeydef View Post
Would one of them be willing to come with you so you don't have to leave him?
Interesting idea for a vacation, but likely an unnecessary expense that might not be realistic for a family who already has a lot of special medical expenses.

I think it will be difficult, but I would focus on the before and after more than the during. Before, I echo what other posters said. For after, I'd make sure you have lots of time and energy left over (hahaha...) to deal with a possibly very disrupted and thus disruptive kiddo. He may very well fall apart for a few weeks from the change, like my daughter did when we moved.

Another idea is maybe you and your partner could take turns on the trip? Like you could go for the first half of the conference and keep him up to date, take lots of notes, etc. and he could go the second half? If there is a particularly important part you want to do together, like a family networking thing or an interactive workshop, then have that be an overlap day.

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#7 of 8 Old Today, 01:21 PM
 
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It's not a vacation though, that's the point. They asked for advice/opinions and I gave mine. Thanks for the response to an old thread though.
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#8 of 8 Old Today, 01:41 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by apeydef View Post
Would one of them be willing to come with you so you don't have to leave him?
Interesting idea for a vacation, but likely an unnecessary expense that might not be realistic for a family who already has a lot of special medical expenses.

I think it will be difficult, but I would focus on the before and after more than the during. Before, I echo what other posters said. For after, I'd make sure you have lots of time and energy left over (hahaha...) to deal with a possibly very disrupted and thus disruptive kiddo. He may very well fall apart for a few weeks from the change, like my daughter did when we moved.

Another idea is maybe you and your partner could take turns on the trip? Like you could go for the first half of the conference and keep him up to date, take lots of notes, etc. and he could go the second half? If there is a particularly important part you want to do together, like a family networking thing or an interactive workshop, then have that be an overlap day.

Writing about life-long learning and discovery at: www.neoapprentice.com 

:: A neo-apprentice knows there are no true masters. 

 

25yo FTM to a Wiggle Panda diaper.gif, student teacher read.gif, newlywed love.gif 

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