what do I do to help my girls get along?
I need help from some experienced mamas.
I have a 3yo who has always been pretty high needs. She is cautious, sensitive, and intense as far as temperament, and has spent most of her life glued to me. I also have a 9 month old, who has recently become mobile. She definitely has a different temperament from her sister: wild and rascally, always busy.
I am home with both of them, and I'm finding it to be really challenging lately. Both girls are frustrated: older DD because she wants space from her wild little sister (but definitely does NOT want space from me), and younger DD because she wants to get in the middle of everything... climbing and grabbing stuff.
How have you mom's dealt with this dynamic? My older DD spends all day asking me to "get the baby", but she will whine for me if I'm playing with my younger DD (distracting the baby so older DD can have space).
My younger DD will cry if I put up a gate so she can see, but not get into an area where older DD and I are playing/working on a project. She also cries if she's in the pack too long, since she wants to get her exploring on and... well, participate.
So basically, the level of frustration in our house is through the roof.... theirs and mine, since I hate this new dynamic. Neither kid seems happy, and I'm starting to feel like I'm just not "enough" mom to go around.
I know part of this is the developmental stage each DD is in, and i hope the intensity fades as they get older. But please give me some tips to ride this out in the meantime, and to help foster a good relationship between them for the long run.