Yep, we're still here~Nov/Dec '02 mommas&babies~ - Page 7 - Mothering Forums

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#181 of 647 Old 08-06-2004, 06:17 PM
 
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oh honey, don't fret about them being comfortable in the sling. they were squished up inside your belly already. and i promise it will not affect their bone development which is the main rude comment i receive. it does take a little adjustment period for both of you.
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#182 of 647 Old 08-06-2004, 06:21 PM
 
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Well let see.... Maxi is a chatterbox. Talking in sentances in Spanish and English. Counting to 10 in Spanish and knows all the body/facial parts in both languages. He is SUPER into trains and trucks which leads me to believe that this boy thing is inherant from birth because I didnt really introduce him - he just seems to know what they are.

He is also really into baseball and loves going to DHs games and throwing the ball himself.

Seems like he is showing signs of being ready for potty training though I am not ready so we will see

Still nursing, slinging and co-sleeping and loving it! Thats about it for us!
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#183 of 647 Old 08-06-2004, 06:52 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MamaFern
its not so much that i *want* to ween him i just get frustrated because he goes from one boob to the other and back and forth and gets mad that i dont have much milk and then he plays with my nipples and nibbles and does acrobatics till i think hes going to rip off my nipples!!
That is my life in a nutshell :LOL

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#184 of 647 Old 08-06-2004, 07:13 PM
 
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nak
mamajazza--- do you have an over active let down by any chance? it took me months to realize that my let down released more then dd could handle. this made her love and hate nursing until i figured it out. pm me if u want.
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#185 of 647 Old 08-06-2004, 07:35 PM
 
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I wanted to agree with casina about the sling. I still can do just about anything when DS is in the sling. It sounds so inhumane, but I used to put Julianna in a sling and hang it off the back of the stroller, like if I had to take both of them to the doctor or WIC or whatever. I kept peeking in at her, but really she was quite comfortable! I always wondered if Zach could breathe while he nursed in there, but he would be happy even if he was all squished up. I always used it when I went shopping when Zach was very young, because he inevitably became hungry/tired halfway through the trip. I LOVE seeing other mamas loading groceries into their cars while nursing a baby in a sling! When I went to The Dead concert last month I got to dance the night away because DS nursed to sleep in the Maya! And when we were coming home from our trip from WA, and our plane was delayed and we had to sit at the airport for three hours with two sleepy, hungry toddlers- Zachary fell asleep in the Maya while Grammy fed Julianna a bottle. Thank GOD for whoever invented the sling. It has been a lifesaver many a time for me, and still is!

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#186 of 647 Old 08-06-2004, 07:42 PM
 
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We saved a lot and get rid of a lot. most of our clothes come second hand so we don't have much into them. Anything that is torn, stain, stretched or just didn't go well with cloth diapers goes. Anything we were keeping around to placate the grandparents goes. I only keep the nicest stuff, knowing that we will recieve more for gifts and that I do enjoy buying new clothes for my children occaisionally. I never once had a new outfit as a child and it drove me crazy. It isn't that much of a sacrifice for me to spend $5 on a clearance outfit. Also I was surprised to see what poor shape most of madelines baby clothes were and how much styles had changed (I know small thing but see above for why it was important. Hand me downs were never stylish in the 80s) . oNe of our favorite outfits my second never wore much because it just didn't line up but I was pumped when Ava could wear it. She wore it once and then when I was taking it off all the snaps pulled out. it was just too old, the fabric had started to break down. Also stains just get worse in storage. My younger two have a pretty steady sourse of hand me down, with quality better than we could afford so there is little reason to keep what my oldest wears. they all have an abundant amount of clothes between what little we kept and, hand me downs, and gifts. i was surprised at how much just didn't work. Mostly with my first because I was unskilled. but stuff that was way to fussy despite being cute, not working over cloth diapers, and bad fabric choices.

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#187 of 647 Old 08-06-2004, 10:22 PM
 
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[QUOTE=Max's Mami] He is SUPER into trains and trucks which leads me to believe that this boy thing is inherant from birth because I didnt really introduce him - he just seems to know what they are.

this sounds like elwynn.. he's crazy about cars..actually anything with whhels.. it makes me crazy because we dont even have a car..we walk everywhere.. and he says car about 600 times a day..and bus and weeeee means train.. he also knows all of his facial features and sometimes i say kiss mamma on the nose..on the cheeks..on the lips..on my head..my eyes... my chin and he does it..it is SOO cute.he's napping now.and he put himself to sleep!

jazz, samaya seems really healthy and happy to me.. you are a really good momma!

ps i dont know how to do the quote thingy..sorry

 

 

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#188 of 647 Old 08-08-2004, 12:59 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I've gotten over my paranoia about Samaya getting enough milk. Strangley enough, it has corresponded with my mom being back home. I guess I needed to be worried about something.

mamafern~ Saw your new pictures, and what a bruise Elwynn has on his nose! (BTW, for the rest of you, Haeven did that to him. She slammed him with a doll stroller )poor little guy. Hope to see you for the LLL meeting on the 9th
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#189 of 647 Old 08-08-2004, 01:53 AM
 
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actually it was a wooden train..i cant believe its taken so long to heal.. the big gash is gone but the bruise is sticking around.. it must have really hurt..and ive been giving him arnica daily. oh well these things happen..he is so accident prone if haeven didnt hurt him im sure he would manage himself just fine :P

jazz, i hope ill be back-what time is the meeting..maybe i can meet you in maple ridge or something. my mom was going to drive me home.. and im glad to hear that you are feeling better about the milk thing.. i always felt like that and it was hard on me..

 

 

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#190 of 647 Old 08-08-2004, 10:26 PM
 
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:LOL BeanBean loves cars, too. He knows all the logos, I'm not even sure how since we honestly don't watch that much tv. Today he took a walk in a parking lot with his grandmother and was running up to each car .."Ford! Pontiac! GMC! Olsmobile! Jeep!" and so on and so forth. :LOL He had the time of his life. :LOL

I was seriously considering selling all of the kids' outgrown stuff, because we're totally strapped for cash. Instead, I'm going to end up sending most of it to my SIL, who's due in December. Still, I'm going to get rid of a bunch of other stuff around here, like clothing *I've* outgrown. I'm losing weight, but I don't think I'll be a size 10 again any time soon. We also have more picture frames than any one family could use. :LOL

Rynna, Mama to Bean (8), Boobah (6), Bella (4) and Bear (2)
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#191 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 12:01 AM
 
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aah, the boyhood comes out. i have a friend who swears her son bit his sandwich into a shape of a gun no matter how much she worked to keep the image and concept out of his life.

the sling is more comfortable the tighter it is because the higher they are the easier it is on your back. having said that, i wear my newborns lower. and the shoulder part is more comfortable spread over the shoulder even though it will block your arm from going all the way up. remember to spread the lower part by the baby going around your waist. the bigger the band around your back the more supportive and comfortable the sling. and the more i wore the sling, the less i fretted about the baby.

meanwhile i'm enjoying my girl so much i just want to make more females to have around. but of course i can't imagine a different girl from ruby. i guess it would take having more girls for me to know how much of what she does is female and how much is her. she is like a different breed of child altogether, even with her personality so akin to reed's.
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#192 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 02:31 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Casina~I just looked at your pics.... I love the one of your son sitting in the tree (spying) wearing a paper bag...: They truely look like "wild" children. I hope you take that as a compliment.

The reason I asked about what kind of sling you use, is because the two that I have "inherited" are not the "maya wrap" style. They are both sewn at the ends, hard to explain... I think I might make/buy a better one, I actually get so annoyed with the ones I have because of them being tapered and sewn at the ends.

I've been meaning to ask you mamas, since we seem to be a little tribe now, what else do you do on MDC? Do you spend a lot of time reading posts, or just catching up on old ones (what I do) ...?
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#193 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 03:13 AM
 
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jasanna, i'm sorry i totally forgot to answer that question. i started on the nojo. it was easy to acquire. the padding made me less worried in the beginning, and the adjustability helped. we quickly outgrew it. i started making slings. i make a ring sling and a pouch and have fooled with the designs and fabrics and made some for others. the pouch is tricky to fit but loveable if it does fit perfectly. i recommend it for once the child is a certain size. i have friends that swear by the pouch no matter what, which sounds like what you have. the good thing is that you cannot fool with it and it is the least bulky and you never worry about it slipping and changing size or getting loose on you. the bad thing is that you cannot fool with it and i had my newborns laying nursing while after about six months they can sit up in it. then it is even more comfortable. but again, i have watched others sling their newborns upright and nurse.
i'd be glad to make you a sling or send you one of my used ones. how tall are you? the one i use the most now is a pouch with fifties housewives on it. i find the print irresistably ironic. unfortunately it is not fit to market because of the way fabric is....

i'm proud of my wild animal children. they are passionate aggressive and wholeheartedly loving. the other day reed took his kung fu uniforn test and he can do a full split sideways and chinese, and do a backbend from standing.
i need to get my camera working! but it is usually dh's territory. old habit. reed decided to take the bag off and the entire daycare was yelling at him because he was naked and ten feet up in the tree. the site has deleted my naked pictures before so i don't bother anymore. that's why there are no funny nursing pictures either. one day i'll get it all figured out, though i'm not sure about having my own website.

i'm really glad you, mamajaza, and mamafern are here. it is part of why this thread is so interesting. i hope you can work out the haeven and elwynn dynamic. by that i mean that you two can be peaceful about it even if the kids aren't. it is tough since you are family and need each others community. i have been on both sides of the aggressor and the attacked with reed at that age and reading your posts i can remember how it felt either way. it sucked feeling helpless and frustrated and pained that somehow as a mamma it was my fault and trying to figure what to do to fix it. especially when i needed the company of the mammas. and parenting the aggressor i find harder because i cannot take a moral stance. generally it has been easier to retreat or to meet at public spaces so there is less of a territory issue, or in a group gathering. but sometimes it got to where i couldn't be friends for awhile, at least in person. i have a friend i dearly love, one of the best mothers i know, that i cannot visit with the way i would like because our kids are so intense and it has happenned repeatedly with different kids since we have three each. i hate to even suggest it could happen that you would need to take a break from seeing each other if it gets too hard, but i think y'all need each other and it is better that the hitting does not divide you. i have dealt with it too many times. they are just babies. what the children do is not a reflection of you. how you react is the reflection of you.

done preaching. :
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#194 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 03:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I do totally blame myself for haeven's aggressiveness. And when she is like that, then I tend to get angry at her, which I know totally doesn't help the situation. I do notice that haeven will be better when we are at the park, or at a LLL meeting. I guess it is because of the "neutral territory" thing. It's funny when you think of it like that. But they are little animals, like we all are.

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#195 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 11:43 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *Mamajaza*
I've been meaning to ask you mamas, since we seem to be a little tribe now, what else do you do on MDC? Do you spend a lot of time reading posts, or just catching up on old ones (what I do) ...?
I belong to quite a few tribes, so I check those first. Then I go looking at other posts or start a few of my own; I've got loads of questions which come up, and MDC is the perfect place to ask because there's bound to be someone here who's done it before me. Sometimes no one can help (no one seems to have a child with feet as wide as BeanBean's, for example) but more often than not I get a few suggestions. There are forums I actively avoid (vaccinations), forums I browse in occasionally but rarely post in (diapering) and forums where I frequently feel the need to respond (homeschooling). I do not lurk in places where I don't belong (conservative tribe) but I do lurk in places where I don't necessarily post (birth & beyond).

I have a Maya sling which I and a pouch sling which I also . The pouch is fleece, so it's really warm and I carry BooBah in it cradled. She sleeps like a doll, it's adorable! The thing I like best about the pouch is that it's so simple Mike can use it all by himself; we just move the snaps so that it's bigger, and voila! He has a really hard time adjusting the Maya for some reason. Still, I'd love to get another Maya, because I end up wearing mine all the time and well, it gets spit on and pooped on and all kinds of stuff. :LOL I also want to get a water sling someday, to hold BooBah in the shower.

Rynna, Mama to Bean (8), Boobah (6), Bella (4) and Bear (2)
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#196 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 12:12 PM
 
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On MDC I belong to the September mommies due date club. I check out Toddlers first and then I head for the due date club. Also I poke around in Activism from time to time. I also poke around in babywearing and diapering. I have posted in Extended Breastfeeding looking for some advice. Every now and then I will post on the Conservative thread in Activism but not very often.

I would like to get an adjustable pouch so my husband can have an easier time of baby wearing. He tried the Maya Wrap ring sling and hated it. I think he would like the pouch if it is adjustable. I have two non-adjustable pouches that won't fit him. He prefers the backpacker. I just have a hard time convincing myself to pay the $56 for a KKAFP. I also want to purchase an Ellaroo. The wraps looking interesting.

Loving Mom to DS (7) and DS (5).
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#197 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 12:13 PM
 
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I forgot to mention that I am starting to lose bits and pieces of my mucous plug. I am wondering if this will be an August baby instead.

Loving Mom to DS (7) and DS (5).
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#198 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 12:14 PM
 
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hi ladies, we are back from our "vacation"

I have so much I want to share with you, but dd is needing some lovin' so I'll leave it to later.

to you all, and I'll be back - I read all the posts I missed yesterday, so I'll post my own update tonight, hopefully..

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#199 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 01:07 PM
 
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casina, have i ever mentioned that i love your hair? i have the same haircut, it's fabulous! :LOL

Rynna, Mama to Bean (8), Boobah (6), Bella (4) and Bear (2)
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#200 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 01:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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hjohnson~ the ellaroo is the wrap-style, right? I have made one like that... it's very easy. you could do that too, if you wanted to save some $$.
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#201 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 01:42 PM
 
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:LOL speaking of hair, i cut off 10 inches the other day for locks of love. WOW

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#202 of 647 Old 08-09-2004, 01:49 PM
 
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That's awesome! My sister cut off 14 inches for Locks of Love a couple months ago. Her hair is now shoulder length and looks great. My hair is above my ears and will probally stay that way.

Loving Mom to DS (7) and DS (5).
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#203 of 647 Old 08-10-2004, 12:44 AM
 
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really rynna, you shaved your head? for me it is so durned practical i can't live with it otherwise for now. i never have to look in the mirror except to put in contacts and inspect my teeth. the main comment i get from women is that they worry they would be masculinized, or that their husbands would hate it. i don't have to worry about feeling my feminimity (sp?) in public when i'm surrounded by children and nursing all the time.

it seems like a haircut year for everyone i know. except my kids. they want all of their hair. i do too until i can't see their eyes.

generally men do not need the adjustments since their chest is the same shape all the way down and there's no chance of nursing in the sling. and hate the tail. it's an interesting market since i actually see more men carrying the babies than the women. one day i'll sell some man slings.....
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#204 of 647 Old 08-10-2004, 08:21 AM
 
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yeah, i've shaved all my hair off before but this is the first time that i've seriously prevented it from growing back. i just love having it super short with the kids; eli can't pull it anymore, and i'm no longer finding my kids wrapped up in my hair (it was fairly long before i shaved it off).

i worried briefly that Mike wouldn't like it, but it got to a point where i just didn't care; i was too hot, and too irritated, and my hair was too much of a pain in the neck (literally). one evening i got out of the shower, couldn't find a comb and i said "honey, i'm shaving my hair off right now." i cut two long braids off for my kids and then just started cutting, long strands of curls flying. mike helped a bit, and beanbean stood by, clapping and saying "yay!" for some reason, he thought it was really cool. :LOLonce it was about 2 inches long, we got the clippers and buzzed me. it's been quite liberating, really. i've been running the clippers over my head twice a week ever since, and i don't think i'll let it grow back until my kids are older.

oh, mike really enjoys it, btw. he loves the way it feels and the way i feel about it. it's a good thing. i highly recommend it. i never thought it would make me feel masculine... i guess beacause i've done it before and i knew it'd be cute. i actually feel more feminine than ever, because i feel cleaner with no hair.

Rynna, Mama to Bean (8), Boobah (6), Bella (4) and Bear (2)
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#205 of 647 Old 08-10-2004, 10:20 AM
 
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tribes ---> this thread, the running mamas thread, I also visit getting started breastfeeding (cause i think they need the support), crafts, and working mamas. I rarely visit the toddler section because ya'll always answer those questions for me.


"i jumpin" is the phrase for the day. Lots of giggles from mom and baby.

Kristin -- mom of Erin (11/5/02) and Leah (9/29/05)
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#206 of 647 Old 08-10-2004, 01:23 PM
 
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Mammajazz-

I totally understand what you are going thru right now with the hitting. I am out of my mind. I blame myself everyday. Maybe it's because I nightweaned her, maybe it is because I work 3 days a week...... I have been beating myself up about this for 2 months now.

I have been reading Easy to Love Difficult to Disipline and How to Talk so Kids Will Listen .... and really trying to use those techniques. I also found a yahoo group for AP Discipline where I have so far only been lurking. I am trying to be very consistant with her and to watch closely to notice when she is getting tired etc.

I hope this passes soon.

Amy
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#207 of 647 Old 08-10-2004, 03:34 PM
 
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some kids just tend to hit. some bite. some of us get more frustrated easily. some of us are not as flexible. when we get tired and hungry we get cranky. it also wore me out to try to make sure my kids are in tip top form for socialization and just tried to make more understanding situations. it is normal, especially with a toddler that is just starting to use the skill of speaking. it is a shame that a baby hitting is so taboo that we get riled up which can sometimes feed the actions into something else. i've also had to deal with different reactions to a boy hitting as opposed to a girl. people tend to be extra alarmed when it is the boys, like that means they will be wife beaters. i believe there is a correlation between the acting out and their energy being lower since they can't handle the situation more appropriately. i have to believe they are doing their best since i am. then there is the quandary of it happenning because i am an open loving parent. of course if i made my children submissive and fearful of me they would not do it. but i think it is important that they feel free to show their emotions with me, and it takes much work and time to show how this can be done civilly. children naturally want to please us. but they have to have the skills as well.
observing and preventing gives me courage. i tackle the situations outside of the home first. i want my kids to observe and act as expected in different situations (notice i'm not saying that i have that yet.....) they are more comfortable at home and it is more confusing for them how much is other people;s desires and my own. these not yet two year olds do not have the impulse control to stop and decide to say i want it instead of hitting for a toy. i do think that consistent 5 second timeout of picking them from the situation right as it happens can show some kids that you are interrupting something you find inappropriate, and perhaps curb it from becoming a habit.
generally in a group situation the kids do work it out. the kids learn who to avoid and such. it is really just harder for us adults. we are not all committed to beating the sin out of them anymore. but we still tend to want the same type of rigid behaviour since that is all we have ever seen.

knowing my child and myself has been the most helpful in the end. having confidence in myself has only benefited my family.
sometimes i had to use bandaids just to get myself out of it the funk. dress my kid silly. put stickers on his forehead. being around older children has helped me too. i remember feeling much better in general after seeing a six year old cry tears because he stepped on some little thorns and his mom standing up holding him like a baby. spending energy worrying about what i've done wrong as a mother is energy i wasted that i could have used in showing my love.

meanwhile, i gotta get off and nuh-nurse!
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#208 of 647 Old 08-10-2004, 04:08 PM
 
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Well ladies, I am 1 1/2 cm dilated and 50% effaced. I am starting to make some progress.

Loving Mom to DS (7) and DS (5).
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#209 of 647 Old 08-10-2004, 05:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank-you Casina for more wise words of experience. I should spend a lot less time worrying about what has happened, and more time loving... which seems like all I do, as my house is a M_E_S_S.

Today Haeven threw the cordless phone at my little 5 week old baby, and it got her in the head. My mom was holding her, so she doesn't have a quick reactions that I have. There is now a bump on her little head, and it broke the skin too. So, I put haeven in the bathroom for a time out. I hope she is learning.

And when she hits elwynn, I put her in time-out as well. It seems to work so far. because when she comes out, she doesn't fight with him for a while.

We went to a LLL meeting last night, and it went well. Babies played nicely. moms got to chat.
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#210 of 647 Old 08-11-2004, 12:22 AM
 
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well ladies, i keep thinking im going to have teh time and energy to update you all on the latest here, but it just ain't happening. My energy is so low, and dd so demanding what's a mama to do. all i want to do is sit and :cry but i dont even have time for that. this has been the worst summer of my life, save for meeting Rose in Cali. That was like a beautiful dream, where for once I wasn't explaining myself, or my child, or my choices. I can't wait for her to get back so she can post some of the pics. It was an instant connection on everyone's part, and for me at least, it was like cool water on a hot day. much needed and oh so refreshing.

I feel so tired and lost these days and this summer has been difficult for us in so many ways. Now we are home and its just us three, I thought that it would be better. Instead I just feel empty and used up. I have to find my spirit again. I was feeling so invincible this spring, but alas I was more fragile than I knew.... All it took was six constant weeks of naggin and me explaining myself and defending myself to erode away all the confidence I had as a mother. It all came to a head yesterday, when I actually spanked my daughter. Boy that really woke me up.... I handled it really well, and of course loved on her and told her that i was wrong and mamas are never suppose to hit their babies. It really showed me how out of it I am though, it seems my anger and frustration is ruling my brain right now, I have to find my way back to peace and serenity, but im not sure how. Im trying to find someone to watch dd for just a few hours (she's nursing so much right now) so i can have a few hours just to concentrate on me and my long neglected needs but dh is working like crazy and my mom turned me down. really there is no one else.

i feel so low and like all i have worked for is wasted.


i would give just about anything to meet any one of you ladies for a nice cup of hot tea. I know you could ground me once again.

See the trip to Cali really sucked. The people we stayed with (dh family) unbeknownst to us didnt want a toddler in their house. We felt unwelcome from the get go. They were so disrespectful of her needs and when we tried to assert them they basically told us we dont know what we are doing because we are young and she is our first. Every night we had an argument because we refused to put her in the crib they borrowed (even though we told them before we went out there not to borrow it, she sleeps with us) We got the CIO speech countless times, they were so uncomfortable with my bf and even made comments about how "third world" it is that I squat down to play with dd etc. !!!! (a habit i picked up from the bradley books i read when pregnant) it was awful. And i feel so guilty because i didnt fight more for her. They refused to bend their schedule to meet her needs and i feel awful that i didnt stand up to them more.

Needless to say we won't be doing that again. We only went this time because mil wanted us to, and paid our way.

Anyhow, that's all from me.

P.S. yeah Heather, you are moving right along. You will be in my thoughts

P.P.S well i've been sitting here thinkign about how i just rained on all y'alls parades adn thought I should say something nice now at the airport when we were coming home, dh had laid dd down to change her diaper, and she said her first sentence : "I want Mama!" talk about heart melting! So yup, I got to do the honors! :LOL
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