So upset - 22 mnth. old tackled baby - should I worry? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 09-21-2005, 02:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm still shaking. This morning I hosted a meeting for an organization I'm in at my home. One of the Moms brought her 6 month old daughter and set her on a blanket by us. My 22 month old son was very interested in the baby and he "played" very nicely with her for about 20 minutes. Then suddenly, with no warning, he straddled her and started like mauling her head She was screaming and it was very hard to get him off her (then he started screaming) It was a scary incident - he has never done anything like this. He has been around babys before (he is an only child) Every once and a while he is "rough" with me or with his best friend. Should I be very worried? I am a wreck. I felt so terrible for the baby, she was fine and the mother seemed fine - but another Mom there kept looking at my son like he was the devil child the rest of the meeting I am worried it s going to get around the organization that my son is "mean" or disturbed ot something. I just don't know if this is something "normal" (I'm a first time Mom) or not. He is on daily asthma medication and one of the listed side effects is "aggressiveness." I'm really wondering about that now :
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#2 of 4 Old 09-21-2005, 02:44 PM
 
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I have a 2 yr old and a 1 yr old. For my boys, this was normal. Just take note that the next time he's around little babies, you need to be down there with him, and help guide him in appropriate behaviour. If the babe was fine and the mom was fine, then I think the incident just needs some taking note. Maybe have a talk with him, using dolls or whatever (role-playing?) on the nice way to play with babies, if he has the interest in that?
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#3 of 4 Old 09-21-2005, 04:39 PM
 
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Oh mama, I've been there. My older son, now 4 went through behavior just like this at playgroup for 2 years. Most of the time when he would tackle/bite/hit another child, it would be for no reason and it would come seemingly out of the blue. He wasn't angry. I eventually stopped going to playgroup since he was labled "the bully". It took me a long time to get comfortable being around other children with him, since his behavior was so unsuspecting. This year he has made huge strides, particularly in the last few months. He has not had any incidents. We had to teach him to read other childrens faces for clues that they did not like the behavior he was doing. We had to teach him to tattle when other children hit him, rather than have him hit back. He still loves to wrestle and tackle, but has learned to pick up on cues when they have had enough. It took a long time and there were so many times I felt so sad and lonely. I didn't want my sweet boy with any label attatched to him. Its hard, but we got through it and he is doing awesome.
Be consistent with whatever you do. Teach him how to play gently using dolls and showing him the proper way to behave. Remove him from the situation every time something like that happens.
We use only gentle discipline with our boys and time outs never worked for my older son. So, when this type of behavior happened, we would simply pick up and leave(depending on how bad the behavior was), at the very least, I would remove him from the situation in order to get his attention.
(((HUGS)))to you!
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#4 of 4 Old 09-21-2005, 05:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you so much lilsis and Willorose - you helped me feel so much better. We also practice gentle discipline and hearing your story makes me feel much affirmed - your cutie sounds like he is doing great Willowrose
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