Help! 2yo wants mommy, only mommy, nooooooo daddy! - Mothering Forums

 
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#1 of 4 Old 10-10-2005, 09:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have a feeling you're all going to tell me this is normal, but...I'm hoping you might have some ideas for handling the fallout. My almost 28 month old ds has begun requiring mommy to do everything, and refusing to have DH help, even with things he used to want only daddy for. Like, stories before bed. The other night he had such a meltdown when I left the room after potty, brush teeth, jammies, put in bed, etc. that, when given the choice of lights out, closing the door and going to bed, or having daddy read stories, he chose lights out! It is mommy does it, or major fits. He has started acting like daddy is the devil - when he is in a mood, daddy can't even bribe him to cooperate with a piece of candy or the like. (Part of me, a very small part at 9 pm, is happy to see this as I think it means my child is smart enough not to be manipulated, but still...=)

My DH is great with the boy, and mostly just takes these fits as they come, but you can only hear "nooooooo Daddy! Mommy potty! Mommy hugs!" (complete with crying, clinging and snot) before it starts to hurt your feelings, ya know?

I should say that I had a baby 2 1/2 months ago. I know that a lot of this mommy do it stuff must be regression, but he didn't seem to have any problems with things until 2 weeks ago. Is this normal for the age? Or, normal with sibling issues? I have to say, by bedtime I am starting to lose it as my very, very, very low maintenance daughter needs to have a little time with mommy too, and that is when she is alert and wanting some interaction. I feel pulled in two directions and would really love to have my hubby be able to help out as he wants to. I need it after a whole day of nursing and carrying my 2 year old around because he can't seem to walk anymore. =)

Please tell me this will pass. Any suggestions, comiserations would be welcome. =)

Krista
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#2 of 4 Old 10-10-2005, 09:13 PM
 
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I love coming to MDC because every time I do I immediately see a post from someone going through EXACTLY what I am. :LOL

I'm guessing it's normal. My DD is 28 months, and for the past few weeks she won't let her Papa do any of the things he normally does. Not even get her dressed, or take her to the bathroom, not anything. It's all "Mama do it! Mama do it!" It's frustrating for both DH and me, because I'm 31 weeks pregnant and suffering from exhaustion and would love her to just let DH take over. I'm guessing a lot of it is sibling jealousy, too (even though DD's sibling hasn't been born yet, I'm sure she's sensing all sorts of changes).

I'm right there with you.
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#3 of 4 Old 10-11-2005, 02:11 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey, thanks! It IS nice even just to hear that another person is going through a similar thing. I think I saw a post from you in another thread and I was thinking, "hey, that's just like us!"

Congrats on your nearly newborn. Despite the tears and the tiredness, it is really a lot of fun to have two. Big brother is really great with his sister for most of the day and it is so fun to see him try to make her laugh. It's just at bedtime that he gets tired of sharing (in part because Daddy is home and he also has to share Mom with Dad! =) In his little toddler sentences he has made it very clear that, "Mommy, bed, stories, Griffon...Daddy, Sophie, couch. OK?" Ha Ha! Tonight while he was sitting on the potty and daddy was trying to keep the baby occupied he stated that "Sophie is TOO LOUD!" =)

Well, I got a few tips from the gentle discipline board and at least bedtime tonight was a little more peaceful. Daddy even got to read a couple of stories to all of us.

Krista
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#4 of 4 Old 10-11-2005, 09:28 AM
 
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Wow! We've been in the same situation for a few months. No new baby to add to the mix, but DH was unemployed over the summer and always around, and DD wasn't getting the Mummy time that she was used to. Our house has reverberated with, "Noooo Daddy Noooo!" and "Mummy do it!" for just about everything. Poor DH; I know that the consistentcy and duration has hurt his feelings, but he's being a trooper. He started a new job yesterday, so maybe that will help settle things a bit, now that we're all getting back to our more regular family rhythms.

It's heartening to know that other families are dealing with a similar situation, hard as it is. We're just trying to ride it out and to be respectful of DD's very strongly stated wishes.

Kristen
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